Showing results by narrator "Johnny Heller" in All Categories

Hector, Terrence, and Dee have always wondered about their school lunch lady. What does she do when she isn't dishing out the daily special? Where does she live? Does she have a lot of cats at home? Little do they know, Lunch Lady doesn't just serve sloppy joes—she serves justice! Whatever danger lies ahead, it's no match for Lunch Lady in these two exciting adventures packed into one audiobook!

In the critically acclaimed Leisureville, Andrew Blechman delves into life in the senior utopia, offering a hilarious firsthand report on everything from ersatz nostalgia to the residents' surprisingly active sex lives. But this is more than just a romp through a retirement paradise; Blechman traces the history of the age-segregated retirement phenomenon, and travels to Arizona to show what has happened to the pioneering developments after decades of segregation.

Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein, longtime philosophers and comedians, present Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar, an entertaining, enlightening, and engaging guide to the love of wisdom. With their combined knowledge, wit, and whimsy, the authors provide a book that can be thoroughly enjoyed by anyone, from the curious layman to the most well-versed professor of Nicomachean Ethics.

It's been two years since the events of Gangsterland, when legendary Chicago hit man Sal Cupertine disappeared into the guise of Vegas rabbi David Cohen. It's September 2001, and for David everything is coming up gold: temple membership is on the rise, the new private school is raking it in, and the mortuary and cemetery - where Cohen has been laundering bodies for the mob - is minting cash. But Sal wants out.

Bob Patterson considers himself an everyman - albeit an everyman with a rich, beautiful wife, two good kids, and a mail-it-in job that ignores his law degree. Despite his good fortune, Bob is idling through life, bored at work and at home. In short, he is the proverbial coaster. Bob's wife, Sarah, is the anointed heir to the empire built by her father, Sam, a kind of Kansas City, Missouri, Warren Buffet. Fine by Bob, the family soccer mom, but early one morning he and Sarah awake to terrible news.

Best-selling author Dan Gutman delights young listeners with the what-if appeal and gentle humor of his Baseball Card Adventures, featuring a time-travelling boy who loves baseball. When Stosh travels into the past to meet Roberto Clemente, a legendary ballplayer and a beloved humanitarian, he’s got only one goal - to warn Roberto not to get on the doomed plane that will end his life in a terrible crash.

In the mid-20th century, Michael S. Gazzaniga made one of the great discoveries in the history of neuroscience: split-brain theory, the notion that the right and left hemispheres of the brain can act independently from each other and have different strengths.

Follow the journey of Nitro, a tiger kept in captivity in Kansas. His story starts when the county sheriff visits a Kansas property and decides to confiscate all big cats from their owner. Lions are sent to a Detroit zoo and Nitro and his friend, Apache, to the Carolina tiger rescue. As Nitro adjusts to his new home, things go terribly wrong.

A tanker steaming through the deep Northwest Providence Channel of the Bahamas comes across a shocking sight: a lone dinghy carrying Captain Julian Harvey and the body of a young girl. They are all that remain of the ketch Bluebelle, a handsome sixty-foot sailing yacht chartered by the Duperrault family of Green Bay, Wisconsin.

Insults are part of the fabric of daily life. But why do we insult each other? Why do insults cause us such pain? Can we do anything to prevent or lessen this pain? Most importantly, how can we overcome our inclination to insult others? In A Slap in the Face, William Irvine undertakes a wide-ranging investigation of insults, their history, the role they play in social relationships, and the science behind them.

After an accident, Laran wakes up in a strange fantasy world governed by a System, with his only knowledge coming from his fiery tutorial assistant, Toot, a faerie who is more snarky than helpful. Even worse, the Undying Empire is hunting him for reasons he doesn’t understand. That means hordes of undead soldiers, dark assassins lurking in every shadow, and worse. The good news is that apparently he is considered a Glory Seeker here, meaning he's able augment almost anything he does by using points of Glory, a resource earned through actions in the world—heroic or villainous.

Carl and his 15-year-old cousin stumble into a clearing to find the small tarpaper shack with the smoke coming out of the chimney. It may belong to a trapper. Or it could belong to a woodsy - a man who live in the woods because he can’t be with other people. But with night advancing quickly, the boys know they must find shelter from the coming storm - and fast. And that’s how they first meet the Foxman, a strange recluse with a face hideously deformed by a wartime injury. While Carl is just as glad to leave the shack after the storm, his cousin feels strangely drawn to the Foxman.

Ned is not just any troll. Even though Ned is nearly seven feet tall, with a nose the size of a pickle, Ned has a heart full of love! A heart that swoons over poetry and craves true friendship! And when it comes to humans...it's complicated. So complicated that, long ago, Ned fled the Enchanted Realm for the one place no one would notice a troll hiding in plain sight: New York City. But one human boy - Cody - has noticed.

Combat veteran and author Hans Halberstadt takes listeners deeper inside the elusive world of snipers than ever before, from recruitment and training to the brutality of the killing fields. Based on hundreds of hours of exclusive interviews, Halberstadt gets inside the sniper mind and shows how snipers think and interact with each other, how missions are planned and executed, how the weapons work, and even what happens when a bullet finally strikes its target.

There are only a few hundred snipers from all the services put together in combat at any one time, making this true inside story a rare and important event.

This is the true story of Carmine Imbriale—a gambler, a brawler, a bandit, a bookie, an enforcer. For two decades, Imbriale was a street-level operative in one of the most violent crews in the Colombo Family. Now in hiding, Imbriale teams up with true-crime veteran writer Craig McGuire to take you inside the Thirteenth Avenue rackets at the height of their violence. This is the jarring account of his lawless lifestyle culminating in a gang war in South Brooklyn, from which he emerges a survivor.

A fascinating insight into notable speeches that were never delivered, showing what could have been if history had gone down a different path. For almost every delivered speech, there exists an undelivered opposite. These "second speeches" provide alternative histories of what could have been if not for schedule changes, changes of heart, or momentous turns of events.

Food writer and clinical psychologist Scott Haas wanted to know what went on inside the mind of a top chef - and what kind of emotional dynamics drove the fast-paced, intense interactions inside a great restaurant. To capture all the heat and hunger, he spent 18 months immersed in the kitchen of James Beard Award-winner Tony Maws's restaurant, Craigie on Main, in Boston. He became part of the family, experiencing the drama first-hand.

Sam Rockwell came home from the Second World War to work as a fledgling private investigator specializing in helping "Returns": recently deceased ghosts who've come back with unfinished business. Short on experience and long on the imitated swagger of the detectives found in his dog-eared collection of pulp fiction P.I. mysteries, the quick-witted Sam waits for his big break - and his chance to win the heart of Amelia, his Girl Friday. But when his no-nonsense father is murdered and becomes a Return himself, everything changes.

The first in a line of Animal Rescues chapter books, Dog Finds Lost Dolphins will be a tale you'll not soon forget. In this charming and awe-inspiring story you'll meet Cloud, the black lab with a nose for rescue. She's the only dog certified to sniff out stranded dolphins. Cloud can sniff out a dolphin over a mile off the coast of the Florida Keys. She's even become friends with them, waiting on the dock for them to pop up and give her a kiss.

Few authors can claim to have marked a genre so thoroughly and personally that their words have leaked into every aspect of modern pop culture. Clive Barker is such an author, and the Books of Blood marked his debut - his coming out to the world - in brilliant, unforgettable fashion. Crossroad Press is proud to present Clive Barker's Books of Blood in digital for the first time.