Fear and Other Uninvited Guests
Tackling the Anxiety, Fear, and Shame That Keeps Us from Optimal Living
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Narrated by:
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Harriet Lerner
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By:
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Harriet Lerner
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Ph.D
About this listen
Unhappiness, says best-selling author Harriet Lerner, is fueled by three key emotions: anxiety, fear, and shame. They are the uninvited guests in our lives. When tragedy or hardship hit, they may become our constant companions.
With stories that are sometimes hilarious and sometimes heartbreaking, Lerner takes us from "fear-lite" to the most difficult lessons the universe sends us. We learn:
- How to have the courage to speak, act, and show up when we are anxious and afraid
- How to deal with the fear of not being good enough and the shame of feeling essentially flawed and inadequate
- How to stay calm and clear in an anxious, crazy workplace
- How to manage fear and despair when things fall apart
- How "positive thinking" helps and harms
- How to be our best and bravest selves, even when we are terrified
No one signs up for anxiety, fear, and shame, but we can't avoid them either. As we learn to respond to these three key emotions in new ways, we can live more fully and move into the future with courage, clarity, humor, and hope. Fear and Other Uninvited Guests shows us how.
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Editorial reviews
The writer of many useful mental health guides says that anxiety, fear, and shame can paralyze us if we don't understand these feelings. But we can become unparalyzed by being proactive, speaking up, thinking positively, and being alert to negative feelings about the self that impose limitations and inhibit healthy interpersonal behavior. Negative emotions can be used to clarify our experiences and promote self-understanding. The key is not being on the defensive and developing more productive and self-affirming emotional patterns. Few guides to emotional functioning have the depth of understanding offered by this therapist, who seems as knowledgeable about the workings of the psyche as she is about formulating real-world coping strategies.
Critic reviews
"Conversational and often witty." (Publishers Weekly)
"Superb insights." (Library Journal)
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- By: Jasmine Harris
- Narrated by: Allison Mason
- Length: 2 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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A lack of quality sleep can hinder your alertness and quality of life while awake, as anyone with sleeping issues already knows. Suffering through sleepless nights does not have to be your reality. Instead you can fall asleep fast and get quality sleep tonight and every night. Hypnosis has been used for centuries to cure many ailments, including the inability to get better sleep. You can help yourself improve the quality of your life with hypnotherapy.
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put me right to sleep
- By Cassandra on 05-08-17
By: Jasmine Harris
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Ho Tactics
- How to MindF**k a Man into Spending, Spoiling, and Sponsoring
- By: G. L. Lambert
- Narrated by: Patrick Stevens
- Length: 9 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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I have discovered a group of women who refuse to be exploited, are immune to manipulation, and who never settle in the name of love. These ladies know what they want and take what they want by beating men at their own game. Utilizing the secrets exposed in this book, these women gain power, money, and status. Men call them gold diggers, women call them hos, but they call themselves winners. This is the book that society doesn't want you to listen to….
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I spent $24,000 in 4 months
- By B.M. on 10-06-18
By: G. L. Lambert
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Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
- A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed
- By: Lori Gottlieb
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley
- Length: 14 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.
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It was like a hallmark movie being waterboarded into my ears for 15 hours
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-19
By: Lori Gottlieb
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The Mastery of Self
- A Toltec Guide to Personal Freedom
- By: Don Miguel Ruiz Jr.
- Narrated by: Charlie Varon
- Length: 3 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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The ancient Toltecs believed that life, as we perceive it, is a dream. We each live in our own personal dream, and these come together to form the dream of the planet, or the world in which we live. Problems arise when our perception of the dream becomes clouded with negativity, drama, and judgment (of ourselves and others), because it's in these moments of suffering that we have forgotten that we are the architects of our own reality and we have the power to change our dream if we choose.
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listen.. .then listen again
- By Casiano on 12-22-16
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How to Say It: Words That Make a Difference
- By: Allison Friederichs Atkison, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Allison Friederichs Atkison
- Length: 4 hrs and 44 mins
- Original Recording
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Words. We use them all the time, every day, mostly without giving them much thought at all. We take for granted that they’re here at our disposal whenever we need them. But if you’ve ever wished you could communicate more effectively, words are the place to start. It’s incumbent upon you to choose the best words to accomplish your goals, because how you choose to communicate influences—well, everything! The power of communication shapes our professional goals, our relationships, and our lives—so the words we choose to use carry a great deal of power.
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Meh. Glad I didn't pay for it.
- By Paula on 07-23-22
By: Allison Friederichs Atkison, and others
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What listeners say about Fear and Other Uninvited Guests
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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- Debra Cockrell
- 10-20-23
Such insight
I listen, stop, listen again and return at letter dates for the refreshing and sustaining insights recorded here and am grateful for the treasure.
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Overall
- Marty
- 12-27-07
very insightful and realistic
This book is excellent in many respects but first a comment about the author's delivery, which other reviewers have made into the issue about this book. It's true. The delivery takes some getting used to. Also, the book starts out a bit slow. It takes time to get to the parts that are actually useful. But, it does provides some very deep insights, in relatively simple terms and what I prize most about her account is that she's realistic and also self-deprecating. If you are looking for ways to understand anxiety and fear and other mind states that can be quite debilitating, this is an excellent resource and the author's perspective provides a sense of understanding that in and of itself can be healing. Excellent book, warts and all.
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13 people found this helpful
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- B. Brown
- 04-17-20
Insightful!
So much wisdom packed into three hour-long chapters! Lerner is a pro at the content. Her delivery was a little hypnotizing, slow, and repetitive. I suggest listening to it at a faster speed than 1.0.
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5 people found this helpful
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- Shelly
- 06-30-15
Harriet Lerner, again, makes it look doable.
I have read Harriet Lerner's books for many years. I find myself rereading them every once in a while when I lapse back into old thinking habits.
She is a down to earth person who is gifted with the ability to break things down to a basic level. I love the examples she shares to illustrate her logic.
It is refreshing to hear her laugh about herself and the experiences that have made her the strong, empowered woman she is today.
I just wish I could find an unabridged recording. I miss the additional stories and concepts that are not included in the abridged recording.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Pamela
- 03-28-15
The humanity of anxiety
I so appreciated how human she makes anxiety. So often I feel like a failure when I'm experiencing anxiety, but this was a refreshing reminder that it's not about whether or not we experience anxiety but how we choose to respond to it. It's definitely going to get a second listen!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Samantha F.
- 07-08-20
understandable and insightful
this book was an easy listen filled with insight. great for anyone interested in understanding and building a healthy relationship with negative emotions
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall
- Brenda
- 01-30-06
Very informative and helpful
Once you get past the sometimes monotonous tone of the author, this book is very helpful. I have read a number of books on anxiety but this one tackles all the issues. She discusses shame, fear, depression, anxiety, and phobias, as well as other conditions and how they all relate.
She takes a somewhat mediation approach to her psychology. That is, being aware of what you are thinking and using this knowledge to move on productively. This approach to me is the best because it forces you to be real and actually deal with you emotions instead of finding ways to distract yourself from them. Her speech is also very real and as a listener you feel connected to her. Some books feel clinical, but not this one.
If you are serious about healing your mind, this is the book to get. It offers concrete advice and is filled with humorous and personal stories. She doesn't just ask you to expose your weakenesses, she invites you to listen to hers as well. So get past her monotone voice and understand the message.
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16 people found this helpful
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- Meena
- 10-14-21
No one other than Harriet
Loved it. No one can present such hard material as simply and as clearly as Harriet.
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Overall
- John
- 05-16-05
Stopped listening 1 hour deep
This audiobook may have had some interesting nuggets, but they were hard to mine from the narrator's irritating tone and impossibly slow pace.
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11 people found this helpful
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- Clare
- 06-06-14
Personal Development Insights
Good content, narrator is author and not ideal. A quick listen. I enjoyed the distinctions.
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