
The New One
Painfully True Stories from a Reluctant Dad
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Narrated by:
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Mike Birbiglia
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J. Hope Stein
About this listen
With laugh-out-loud funny parenting observations, the New York Times best-selling author and award-winning comedian delivers a book that is perfect for anyone who has ever raised a child, been a child, or refuses to stop acting like one.
In 2016, comedian Mike Birbiglia and poet Jennifer Hope Stein took their 14-month-old daughter, Oona, to the Nantucket Film Festival. When the festival director picked them up at the airport, she asked Mike if he would perform at the storytelling night. She said, "The theme of the stories is jealousy."
Jen quipped, "You're jealous of Oona. You should talk about that."
And so Mike began sharing some of his darkest and funniest thoughts about the decision to have a child. Jen and Mike revealed to each other their sides of what had gone down during Jen's pregnancy and that first year with their child. Over the next couple years, these stories evolved into a Broadway show, and the more Mike performed it, the more he heard how it resonated - not just with parents but also people who resist all kinds of change.
So he pored over his journals, dug deeper, and created this book: The New One: Painfully True Stories from a Reluctant Dad. Along with hilarious and poignant stories he has never shared before, this audiobook is sprinkled with poetry Jen wrote as she navigated the same rocky shores of new parenthood.
So here it is. This book is an experiment - sort of like a family.
©2020 Mike Birbiglia and J. Hope Stein (P)2020 Grand Central PublishingInterview: Mike Birbiglia Tells the Deeper Story in 'The New One'
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Critic reviews
"Fusing good humor and raw honesty with selections from Stein's evocative poetry, Birbiglia narrates his journey into parenting...Hilarious, relatable, cringeworthy, and effortlessly entertaining." (Kirkus, starred review)
"This is a brilliant, funny, big-hearted version of he-said, she-said. Birbiglia and Stein trade jokes and poems and splendid storytelling about their roundabout stumble into parenthood. It's hilarious, humane, often beautiful, and absolutely captivating." (Susan Orlean, staff writer at The New Yorker and New York Times best-selling author of The Library Book)
"Mike Birbiglia and Jen Stein are the best collaborators since Emily Dickinson teamed up with her long-winded comedian friend. I'm joking because I cannot express how much this book affected me and how many times it made me cry." (John Mulaney, comedian)
"Wise and wise-assed, the comic hit of the year." (Mary Karr, best-selling author of The Liar's Club, Cherry, and Lit)
"Birbiglia and Stein have not only survived parenthood, they're making their most hilarious and truthful art yet. This book might save your best friend's life." (Lin-Manuel Miranda, Pulitzer Price-winning writer of Hamilton)

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- What Street Addresses Reveal About Identity, Race, Wealth, and Power
- By: Deirdre Mask
- Narrated by: Janina Edwards
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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An exuberant and insightful work of popular history of how streets got their names, houses their numbers, and what it reveals about class, race, power, and identity. When most people think about street addresses, if they think of them at all, it is in their capacity to ensure that the postman can deliver mail or a traveler won’t get lost. But street addresses were not invented to help you find your way; they were created to find you. In many parts of the world, your address can reveal your race and class.
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Simply OK
- By CJFLA on 07-18-20
By: Deirdre Mask
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Written in Bone
- Hidden Stories in What We Leave Behind
- By: Sue Black
- Narrated by: Sue Black
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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In her memoir All That Remains, internationally renowned forensic anthropologist and human anatomist Dame Sue Black recounted her life lived eye to eye with the Grim Reaper. During the course of it, she offered a primer on the basics of identifying human remains, plenty of insights into the fascinating processes of death, and a sober, compassionate understanding of its inescapable presence in our existence. Now in this book, Black builds on that memoir, taking us on a guided tour of the human skeleton and explaining how each person's life history is revealed in their bones.
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A very human story by a very believable human
- By Gary on 09-21-21
By: Sue Black
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Misfit
- Growing Up Awkward in the '80s
- By: Gary Gulman
- Narrated by: Gary Gulman
- Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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For years, Gary Gulman had been the comedian’s comedian, acclaimed for his delight in language and his bracing honesty. But after two stints in a psych ward, he found himself back in his mother’s house in Boston—living in his childhood bedroom at age forty-six, as he struggled to regain his mental health. That’s where Misfit begins. Then it goes way back. This is no ordinary book about growing older and growing up. Gulman has an astonishing memory and takes the listener through every year of his childhood education, with detailed stories that are in turn alarming and riotously funny.
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I get it
- By Karen Johnson on 10-02-23
By: Gary Gulman
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Under a White Sky
- The Nature of the Future
- By: Elizabeth Kolbert
- Narrated by: Rebecca Lowman
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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That man should have dominion “over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth” is a prophecy that has hardened into fact. So pervasive are human impacts on the planet that it’s said we live in a new geological epoch: the Anthropocene. The question we now face is: Can we change nature, this time in order to save it? Elizabeth Kolbert, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author of The Sixth Extinction, takes a hard look at the new world we are creating.
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Feel Sorry For Your Grandchildren
- By Allen Moody on 02-28-21
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The Devil Finds Work
- An Essay
- By: James Baldwin
- Narrated by: Dion Graham
- Length: 3 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Baldwin's personal reflections on movies gathered here in a book-length essay are also a probing appraisal of American racial politics. Offering an incisive look at racism in American movies and a vision of America's self-delusions and deceptions, Baldwin challenges the underlying assumptions in such films as In the Heat of the Night, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, and The Exorcist.
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A Critical Masterpiece.
- By Ramon McGee on 05-10-18
By: James Baldwin
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Unorthodox
- The Scandalous Rejection of My Hasidic Roots
- By: Deborah Feldman
- Narrated by: Rachel Botchan, Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 10 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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As a member of the strictly religious Satmar sect of Hasidic Judaism, Deborah Feldman grew up under a code of relentlessly enforced customs governing everything from what she could wear and to whom she could speak to what she was allowed to read. Yet in spite of her repressive upbringing, Deborah grew into an independent-minded young woman whose stolen moments reading about the empowered literary characters of Jane Austen and Louisa May Alcott helped her to imagine an alternative way of life among the skyscrapers of Manhattan.
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Narrator Problem
- By Phyllis on 04-24-20
By: Deborah Feldman
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Harold
- By: Steven Wright
- Narrated by: Steven Wright
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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From the outside, Harold is an average seven-year-old third grader growing up in the 1960s. Bored by school. Crushing on a girl. Likes movies and baseball—especially the hometown Boston Red Sox. Enjoys spending time with his grandfather. But inside Harold’s mind, things are a lot more complex and unusual. His thoughts come to him as birds flying through a small rectangle in the middle of his brain. He visits an outdoor cafe on the moon and is invited aboard a spaceship by famed astronomer Carl Sagan.
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Yes, Harold?
- By DC333 on 06-27-23
By: Steven Wright
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I Have Something to Tell You
- A Memoir
- By: Chasten Buttigieg
- Narrated by: Chasten Buttigieg
- Length: 7 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Throughout the past year, teacher Chasten Glezman Buttigieg has emerged on the national stage, having left his classroom in South Bend, Indiana, to travel cross-country in support of his husband, former mayor Pete Buttigieg, and Pete's groundbreaking presidential campaign. Through Chasten's joyful, witty social media posts, the public gained a behind-the-scenes look at his life with Pete on the trail - moments that might have ranged from the mundane to the surprising, but that were always heartfelt.
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A common yet inspiring and hopeful story
- By Steph on 09-03-20
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Funny Farm
- My Unexpected Life with 600 Rescue Animals
- By: Laurie Zaleski
- Narrated by: Erin Moon
- Length: 8 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Laurie Zaleski never aspired to run an animal rescue; that was her mother Annie’s dream. But from girlhood, Laurie was determined to make the dream come true. Thirty years later as a successful businesswoman, she did it, buying a 15-acre farm deep in the Pinelands of South Jersey. She was planning to relocate Annie and her caravan of ragtag rescues - horses and goats, dogs and cats, chickens and pigs - when Annie died, just two weeks before moving day. In her heartbreak, Laurie resolved to make her mother’s dream her own.
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Heartwarming
- By Petfan on 04-13-22
By: Laurie Zaleski
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Parade
- A Novel
- By: Rachel Cusk
- Narrated by: Genevieve Gaunt
- Length: 5 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Midway through his life, the artist G begins to paint upside down. Eventually, he paints his wife upside down. He also makes her ugly. The paintings are a great success. In Paris, a woman is attacked by a stranger in the street. Her attacker flees, but not before turning around to contemplate her victim, like an artist stepping back from a canvas. At the age of twenty-two, the painter G leaves home for a new life in another country, far from the disapproval of her parents. Her paintings attract the disapproval of the man she later marries.
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Incomprehensible biologically-essentialist nonsense
- By Lu Clark on 03-15-25
By: Rachel Cusk
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Left on Tenth
- A Second Chance at Life: A Memoir
- By: Delia Ephron
- Narrated by: Delia Ephron
- Length: 7 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Delia Ephron had struggled through several years of heartbreak. She’d lost her sister, Nora, and then her husband, Jerry, both to cancer. Several months after Jerry’s death, she decided to make one small change in her life - she shut down his landline, which crashed her internet. She ended up in Verizon hell.
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Cover to cover in a day
- By Ginny Kubek on 04-24-22
By: Delia Ephron
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Godshot
- A Novel
- By: Chelsea Bieker
- Narrated by: Lauren Ezzo
- Length: 11 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Drought has settled on the town of Peaches, California. The area of the Central Valley where fourteen-year-old Lacey May and her alcoholic mother live was once an agricultural paradise. Now it's an environmental disaster, a place of cracked earth and barren raisin farms. In their desperation, residents have turned to a cult leader named Pastor Vern for guidance. He promises, through secret "assignments," to bring the rain everybody is praying for.
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flawless novel, not the best narration
- By Adrienne on 05-05-20
By: Chelsea Bieker
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Becoming Elisabeth Elliot
- By: Ellen Vaughn
- Narrated by: Connie Shabshab
- Length: 12 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Elisabeth Elliot was a young missionary in Ecuador when members of a violent Amazonian tribe savagely speared her husband, Jim, and his four colleagues. Incredibly, prayerfully, Elisabeth took her toddler daughter, snakebite kit, Bible, and journal...and lived in the jungle with the stone-age people who killed her husband. In this authorized biography, Ellen Vaughn uses Elisabeth’s private, unpublished journals, and candid interviews with her family and friends, to paint the adventures and misadventures God used to shape one of the most influential women in modern church history.
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Great book!
- By Dove on 09-27-20
By: Ellen Vaughn
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Uncommon Type
- Some Stories
- By: Tom Hanks
- Narrated by: Tom Hanks
- Length: 10 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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A collection of 17 wonderful short stories showing that two-time Oscar winner Tom Hanks is as talented a writer as he is an actor. The short stories are surprising, intelligent, heartwarming, and, for the millions and millions of Tom Hanks fans, an absolute must-have!
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Old fashioned romp of stories, some real gems!
- By Lili on 11-13-17
By: Tom Hanks
Funny, heartwarming, and most importantly funny
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(Disclaimer: the writer of this review does not recommend physically eating this book or the device playing this audiobook. Such action could result in injury or death. Learn about metaphors!)
All the thread counts! Baby changes everything!
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My one complaint was that I wish they could have found a way to mix the audio to balance the two narrator's voices. J. Hope Stein's voice is so soft that I had to crank up the volume every time she came on, only to have my eardrums blasted by Birbiglia's much stronger narration.
This is a book I would recommend for parents of children young and old, as well as those thinking about the prospect of parenting, who might be on the fence.
Raw, Entertaining
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touching raw and funny
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Really nice!
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Lotsa Laughs
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Funniest Book I've Heard So Far!
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As someone undecided on whether to have children
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What a phenomenal book.
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Not My Favorite
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