Showing results by narrator "Patrick Harris" in All Categories

"Congratulations!" You're about to have a kid? Well, Bro, you might be asking yourself a series of important questions: Will I be able to afford this? Can I ever have sex again? Will I be a good parent? Am I able to love this child as much as I love my own life? Can I ever have sex again? Well, the answer to all of these questions is a rock solid "no." But just because your life is now a petrifying turd on the canvas of life doesn't mean your kid has to be as lame as you're about to become. And Barney Stinson is here to help.

The latest work from one of America's most important young playwrights and creator of the current hit TV series, "Brothers and Sisters". Financial powerhouse Sandy Sonnenberg finds his personal and professional life threatened by unraveling secrets from his past. A tragic game of financial and moral betrayal plays out over four decades, with an exacting price - family, friends, love and marriage. Starring members of the original Off-Broadway production.

The theft of a whetstone from a Welsh museum and the murder of a curate during a grave robbery seem, at first, like random crimes. But the troubling deeds are linked by a precarious thread. An unusual collection of rare and scattered British antiquities has become a target — and the relics' value lies in something much more dangerous than money....

Brad Denning's brother Petey is long lost, and Brad's picture-perfect life is haunted by guilt over Petey's childhood disappearance. But everything changes one day when a man claiming to be Petey appears, ingratiates himself in Brad's life - and then kidnaps Brad's wife and son. After the police and FBI are forced to end their fruitless search, Brad's only recourse is to put himself into the mind of the man who claimed to be his brother, and hunt him down himself.

Do you believe in magic? Carter doesn’t. He knows magic tricks are just that - tricks. And as a street magician he’s also pretty good at them. But then Carter runs away from his con man uncle, and he finds himself alone and in danger from dastardly carnival ringleader, B. B. Bosso. He could really use some magic now.... A chance encounter with the mysterious Mr Dante Vernon leads Carter to a magic shop, where he teams up with five other like-minded kids, and the Magic Misfits are born! Can the gang use their magical talents to save the day and stop B. B. stealing a priceless diamond?

With all the excitement of Christmas approaching, it's no surprise that Marley, the lovable pup with a nose for trouble, wants to get in on the action. Anticipating his very first snowfall and Santa's arrival, Marley jumps in to help his family every way he can. But Marley, being Marley, always ends up on the wrong side of right. It's not long before he tears down the twinkle lights, attacks a chain of paper snowflakes, and mistakes the Christmas tree for...well...his very own indoor bathroom.

Ruby was murdered on Earth 18 years ago and reincarnated on Zadok as a Pastel Zeek named Harlow. To be born at the bottom of her race’s caste colour system to a middle-class family of Magentas has made Harlow a source of conflict amongst the ruling Purples, and a source of derision from all three colours.

The Byrnes family came to Texas and carved out a place on the land. Three generations who paid in blood and treasure. Children carried off by Comanche. A brother lost to war. Lives shattered. Chet Byrnes was trying to hold the ranch together through one more winter for one more cattle drive when he hanged three horse thieves this side of the Red River - and a blood feud erupted....

Lou Prophet loves to keep beautiful women company. But when the invitation comes from Miss Louisa Bonaventure, the Vengeance Queen, he finds himself intimate with hot lead instead of her warm female form. Louisa’s got him riding the brutal Mexican frontier chasing outlaws led by Tony Lazzaro, a notorious thief whose deadly weapon, Sugar Delphi, is a blind and blood-hungry pistolera.

Tensions between the Bearkillers, the Mackenzies and Mount Angel alliance, and Norman Arminger’s Portland Protectorate Association have finally come to a head, as the Protector’s armies invade the Western Territories. Mike Havel faces down the deadly Lord Alexi Stavarov and his combined forces at the now ruined city of Salem. Meanwhile, Lady Juniper and the Clan Mackenzie take to the hills with a guerrilla style campaign against the Marchwarden Conrad Renfrew.

The Lord Protector of Portland has continued to press his rule into every corner of the Willamette. Both Juniper and Havel know that war is coming, but their allies in the Free-state of Corvallis are less convinced. Sir Nigel continues his escape from mad King Charles with the aid of his new found Tasmanian allies, having to out race the legendary sailing ship the Cutty Sark and battle pirates off the coast of Africa.

Rudi Mackenzie has been abducted by the forces of the Portland Protective Association, whose forces have pushed the Bearkillers and Mackenzie’s to the edge of defeat. Will aid arrive in time or will Mike Havel and his family be defeated by Norman Arminger and his mad grab for power? What of the secret plan now afoot between the Mackenzie’s and the forces at Mount Angel? Will the Abbot Dmwoski and his forces be able to break the siege of their monastery in time to come to the aid of Lady Juniper and her Witch Army?

Alex has called it quits and stormed off, leaving Harlow alone and vulnerable in the danger zone with little chance of survival and a broken heart. Luckily, Jax finds her and brings her back to the caves. However, little does she know she’s returning with multiple souvenirs. Standing out for all the wrong reasons has become Harlow’s specialty, and as the effects of her vertic switz tattoo set in and new issues are brought to light, she and her friends will find themselves in the line of fire with Rae and Electra.

It’s been eight years since the Change rendered technology inoperable across the globe. Rising from the ashes of the computer and industrial ages is a brave new world. Survivors have banded together in tribal communities, committed to rebuilding society. In Oregon’s Willamette Valley, former pilot Michael Havel’s Bearkillers are warriors of renown. Their closest ally, the mystical Clan Mackenzie, is led by Wiccan folksinger Juniper Mackenzie. Their leadership has saved countless lives.

Matt North's secret plan to force an entire range to reverse its decision to raise sheep.

About the fascinating Mrs. King, young Rosalia Dures, and the strong, silent Tom Folliard. A story in which bullets supply the answer after all other ways fail.

Growing up in an orphanage, Leila was bullied for being different. But she turned her hardship into skill by becoming an escape artist - a valuable trait when belonging to a group of magical best friends. When a famous psychic comes to town, however, Leila and her pals won't be able to escape the big mystery heading their way. Whether chasing mad monkeys or banishing ghosts from haunted hotels, these six friends will do their best to keep Mineral Wells safe - but can they still protect themselves in the process?

The news is bad. The stage driver's wife who is expecting a child has taken a serious fall and now needs her husband. Dave Judd will take his place driving the stagecoach filled with passengers who want to get through before the bitter cold that is lifting becomes a blizzard.

Ridley Larsen is everything you want in a friend. She's tough as nails, she's fiercely loyal and she's smart as a whip. But she can be a harsh critic, which has put her position with the Magic Misfits on the rocks, even as the threat of the group's longtime enemy Kalagan looms large. Ever since his recent appearance in Mineral Wells, the kids know that a showdown with the vicious magician is imminent. They must first deal with a series of odd instances and random attacks, though, all of which they use to bring themselves closer to discovering where Kalagan may be hiding.

Matt Hurst seeks justice when a sheriff's posse kills his father and brothers.