
Rethinking Narcissism
The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
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Narrated by:
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Kiff VandenHeuvel
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By:
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Dr. Craig Malkin
About this listen
Harvard Medical School psychologist and Huffington Post blogger Craig Malkin addresses the "narcissism epidemic" by illuminating the spectrum of narcissism, identifying ways to control the trait, and explaining how too little of it may be a bad thing.
"What is narcissism?" is one of the fastest rising searches on Google, and articles on the topic routinely go viral. Yet, the word narcissist seems to mean something different every time it's uttered. People hurl the word as an insult at anyone who offends them. It's become so ubiquitous, in fact, that it's lost any clear meaning. The only certainty these days is that it's bad to be a narcissist - really bad - inspiring the same kind of roiling queasiness we feel when we hear the word sexist or racist. That's especially troubling news for millennials, the people born after 1980, who've been branded the "most narcissistic generation ever".
In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self. On the far end lies sociopathy. Malkin deconstructs the healthy from the unhealthy narcissism and offers clear, step-by-step guidance on how to promote healthy narcissism in our partners, our children, and ourselves.
©2015 Craig Malkin (P)2015 HarperCollins PublishersListeners also enjoyed...
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This book CHANGED MY LIFE!
- By Mojo on 12-19-18
By: Debbie Mirza
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You Might Be a Narcissist If... - How to Identify Narcissism in Ourselves and Others and What We Can Do About It
- By: Paul Meier, Cynthia Munz, Lisa Charlebois
- Narrated by: Stuart Richardson
- Length: 2 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Why is this relationship so hard? It is so invigorating to know that we don't have to stay stuck. Even if we're not the one struggling with narcissism, we can change the way we relate to the people who do. Find out if the stress in your relationships with family, friends, or at work is unknowingly caused from narcissism in yourself or others... Narcissism is actually much more common than we may think and, in reality, most of us have some of these characteristics.
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Great book
- By Todd Shipman on 07-25-20
By: Paul Meier, and others
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The Narcissism Epidemic
- Living in the Age of Entitlement
- By: Jean M. Twenge, W. Keith Campbell
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 12 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Dr. Jean M. Twenge focuses on the pernicious spread of narcissism in today's culture, which has repercussions for every age group and class. Dr. Twenge joins forces with Dr. W. Keith Campbell, a nationally recognized expert on narcissism, to explore this new plague. Together, they provide an eye-opening exposition of the alarming rise of narcissism and its catastrophic effects at every level of society.
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An Outstanding Piece of Work, Highly Reccomended
- By RWalker on 08-12-14
By: Jean M. Twenge, and others
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Gaslighting
- Recognize Manipulative and Emotionally Abusive People -- and Break Free
- By: Stephanie Moulton Sarkis
- Narrated by: Suehyla El Attar, Stephanie Moulton Sarkis
- Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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A mental health expert sheds light on "gaslighting" - the manipulative technique used by sociopaths, narcissists, and others - offering practical strategies to cope and break free. Dr. Sarkis delves into the psychology behind the phenomenon, devoting chapters to specific scenarios, such as gaslighting in dating, in relationships, at work, and in families. With warning signs and examples of the destructive consequences along with practical tips and strategies, Gaslighting will help anyone trapped in a manipulative relationship to break free and heal from this toxic behavior.
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This book helped me through the toughest of times
- By Claudia on 12-10-18
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Toxic Parents
- Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life
- By: Craig Buck, Susan Forward
- Narrated by: Jo Anna Perrin
- Length: 10 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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In this remarkable self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward draws on case histories and the real-life voices of adult children of toxic parents to help you free yourself from the frustrating patterns of your relationship with your parents---and discover a new world of self-confidence, inner strength, and emotional independence.
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Its worth a listen.
- By Amanda on 08-20-12
By: Craig Buck, and others
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Why Is It Always About You?
- The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism
- By: Sandy Hotchkiss, James F. Masterson MD - foreword
- Narrated by: Amanda Carlin
- Length: 7 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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In this groundbreaking audiobook, clinical social worker and psychotherapist Sandy Hotchkiss shows you how to cope with controlling, egotistical people who are incapable of the fundamental give-and-take that sustains healthy relationships. Exploring how individuals come to have this shortcoming, why you get drawn into their perilous orbit, and what you can do to break free, Hotchkiss describes the "Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism" and their origins.
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Beyond Useful -Going to relisten often
- By SleezeyBoi on 04-21-20
By: Sandy Hotchkiss, and others
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How to Stop Being a Narcissist
- Overcome the Toxic Narcissism that is Sabotaging Your Relationships
- By: Lucas Bailey
- Narrated by: Christopher Macky
- Length: 3 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you find it hard to maintain existing connections, ultimately resulting in lost opportunities? It’s proven that by taking the right daily actions, you can build and strengthen the bonds you need to take you where you want to go. Do you fear losing the people closest to you because of your narcissistic tendencies? That’s where the multi-award-nominated author Lucas Bailey’s book How to Stop Being a Narcissist comes into its own!
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Poorly written, no references: AVOID
- By Juan Vera on 07-10-23
By: Lucas Bailey
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Should I Stay or Should I Go?
- Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist
- By: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Should I Stay or Should I Go? is a survival manual, a guidebook, and a shot of reality. Some people will never change, and kissing frogs is the stuff of fairy tales, not real life. The Beast never turns out to be a nice guy (or gal). This is a book that breaks down what mean people do to us, how they do it, and what we can do to survive.
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Wake up call !
- By sashy on 08-18-16
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Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare
- How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself
- By: Shahida Arabi
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
- Length: 19 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Although clinical research has been conducted on narcissism as a disorder, less is known about its effects on victims who are in toxic relationships with partners with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Individuals with this disorder engage in chronic devaluation and manipulation of their partners, a psychological and emotional phenomenon known as "narcissistic abuse". Unfortunately, the full extent of what narcissistic abuse entails is not taught in any psychology class or diagnostic manual.
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Finally
- By zero on 12-08-16
By: Shahida Arabi
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The Empath and the Narcissist
- An Empath's Guide to Recognizing, Overcoming, and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Christine Murray
- Narrated by: Nyamukandawiri
- Length: 1 hr and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Empaths and narcissists are on opposite sides of the spectrum. They attract each other like magnets. But the truth is they are a toxic duo. Remember when you first met a certain narcissist? Remember how charming and loving and attentive they seemed? Remember the butterflies you felt in your stomach every time you saw them? They lured you in like a fisherman. The Empath and the Narcissist will help you discover how to come to terms with your narcissistic acquaintance, combat common tactics narcissists use to manipulate you, and how to get on the road to recovery and healing.
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A decent baseline on the topic
- By Shannon R Story on 03-26-23
By: Christine Murray
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"Don't You Know Who I Am?": How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility
- By: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
- Length: 19 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Health and wellness campaigns preach avoidance of unhealthy foods, sedentary lifestyles, tobacco, drugs, and alcohol, but rarely preach avoidance of unhealthy, difficult, or toxic people. Yet the health benefits of removing toxic people from your life may have far greater benefits to both physical and psychological health. We need to learn to be better gatekeepers for our minds, bodies, and souls. Narcissism, entitlement, and incivility have become the new world order, and we are all in trouble. They are not only normalized but also increasingly incentivized.
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Excellent reality check
- By Lisa Rose on 10-11-19
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Out of the Fog
- Moving from Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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The FOG is an acronym that stands for "Fear, Obligation, and Guilt". These three emotions are often how narcissists, sociopaths, and other types of emotional manipulators go about controlling others.
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THE best book I’ve ever read on the subject
- By Alexandria Filipowski on 10-23-19
By: Dana Morningstar
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It's Not You
- Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People
- By: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani Durvasula PhD, Maria Shriver
- Length: 11 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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It’s not always easy to tell when you’re dealing with a narcissist. One day they draw you in with their confidence and charisma, the next they gaslight you, wreck your self-confidence, and leave you wondering, What could I have done differently? As Dr. Ramani Durvasula reveals in It's Not You, the answer is: absolutely nothing. Just as a tiger can’t change its stripes, a narcissist won’t stop manipulating and invalidating you. To heal in the aftermath of their abuse and protect yourself from future harm, you first have to accept that you are not to blame.
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I needed this
- By Austin E. Jonas Jr. on 03-02-24
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Covert Narcissism
- Signs of a Covert Narcissist, Ways to Protect Yourself from Their Manipulation and How to Deal with Their Narcissism
- By: Louisa Cox
- Narrated by: Heidi Baker
- Length: 1 hr and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Covert narcissism is a hidden and concealed form of narcissism, making it all the more difficult for the abuser to be confronted or "outed" for their behavior. Covert narcissism is a passive-aggressive, hostile, and toxic form of abuse that makes victims feel hopeless, unheard, hurt, and confused by the abusers' behavior.
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Good
- By John Galt on 08-10-19
By: Louisa Cox
What listeners say about Rethinking Narcissism
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- Jill
- 10-02-15
A timely and practical book
I'm a clinical psychologist who works with many "Echos and Narcissists" in my psychotherapy practice. This book's spectrum approach to understanding narcissism is positive and well explained. Dr Malkin's writing is clear and approachable without being technically dense or overly simplistic. The narration of this audio book couldn't have been more perfect. And I didn't catch a single mispronunciation in the entire narration, always a pleasure. I will definitely be recommending this book to many of my clients.
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7 people found this helpful
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- Holistic_Practitioner
- 01-19-20
Great dive into rediscovering narcissism
Absolutely loved it. Learned so much about myself and those around me. Wonderful narration also!!
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-02-17
Excellent exploration of healthy and unhealthy pre
Excellent exploration of healthy and unhealthy presentations of narcissism. The narrator is engaging as well.
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- Courtenay Veenis
- 02-02-19
Top of its category many categories actually
I cannot remember the last time I finished a book reading visually or listening where I had to say to myself throughout the process especially towards the last few chapters I had to stop and say oh my gosh wait who is this guy again even though I know exactly who he is I have been engaging online with YouTube ever since my 1st real paradigm/existential breakdown after some very a some very borderline psychopathic or pathological personalities in my life... I am no longer saying covert narcissism because I was listening to the fact that this is not a medical or a legitimate term to be using. I am using my Bluetooth to say this also I apologize for the lack of punctuation and if you could just meet me in the middle and forgive me for I just genuinely don't wanna forget or put off for a minute my experience with this book it is a Self Help book I guess technically by every sentence is literally poignant and terse and intelligent and also thoughtful and well just simply useful I wish I could speak to so many individuals about this book right now and run to them but I'm going to tame the Echo and just process on my own. I'm crying a little bit now thank you for this book.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Laurie A. Helgoe
- 06-25-17
Well researched, well written, and well read
Dr. Malkin's discussion of narcissism is humanizing, accessible, and practical. It is too easy to portray narcissists as caricatures, feeding the very dynamic that reinforces the problem. Malkin helps us see the human in narcissism, and the versions of narcissism (or problematic lack of) that all of us contend with, sometimes for better and sometimes for worse. A comprehensive and generous work.
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- Erin Brzykcy
- 05-03-17
Objective Explanation of Narcissism
I like how Narcissism was explained on a spectrum, including "healthy narcissism". I appreciated the positive research and the explanation of addiction. I especially enjoyed the chapter on parenting.
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- Mary Robinson
- 03-28-21
The book Gave me a new perspective
The book starts with the premise that we are all narcissists at some level from healthy to unhealthy, which altered my view on life and other people in a healthy new way.
I also like the voice of the speaker. The speaker is as important as the words that are spoken. If I can’t tolerate listening to the voice, then it becomes difficult to receive the information by the author.
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- Amazon Customer
- 05-17-23
Love the spectrum
Dr. Malkin talks about how narcissism is a spectrum and too little narcissism is just as bad as too much. I agree. In a way, the book gave me permission to enjoy public speaking and to continue having the desire to be an influencer. While, at the same time, it provided me guidance on how to avoid harming others with my desire to feel special. We’re all special. And I can be special in my own way without stealing the spotlight or putting someone else down to retain my need to be special. I can allow other people to hold the spotlight and be special without it ruining my self image.
I’m not an extreme narcissist, but I would say my narcissistic traits are higher than normal. I’d probably be a 7 on his scale. I’m not quite healthy. I still have things to work on. But, I was grateful Dr. Malkin didn’t say that all narcissism was bad. I was feeling like I needed to either throw caution to the wind and embrace being an extreme narcissist or give up my career aspirations as unhealthy fantasies. It’s nice to know that I can strive for a healthy medium and keep finding joy in my career goals without harming others.
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- Jonathan
- 07-11-17
more true perspective of understanding narcissism
very much appreciated this understanding View of narcissism in general, but also in light of narcissistic personality disorder. Would have loved to see some expounding on cluster personality traits as some of those were a parent in some of the examples given, but that probably would have had to reprioritize other aspects out of the book. overall, very very good. I'm glad to have read it!
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- Merle B
- 05-27-19
A Highly Informative Book on Narcissism
This book was a bit of a surprise, as I didn't expect it to be as good as it was. I have read quite a few books on the narcissism spectrum, and found that this one was one of the clearest explainers on healthy and unhealthy narcissism. It's a short and easy read. I highly recommend it.
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