✿Summary

S1 E5: Smashing the Patriarchy (with Music & Wisdom!)

Zoe and the incredible Vidya Rao dive into voice, self-expression, and how to overcome the weight of societal expectations on women. Vidya, Thumri singer, feminist researcher and wise crone, opens up about high-functioning depression, resilience, and the healing power of music. They explore aging with grace, embracing contradictions, and the deep need for community. Get ready for an inspiring, thought-provoking ride—because smashing the patriarchy (since the 70s) sounds even better with a soundtrack! 🎶💥

✿Keywords

Vidya Rao, Thumri, feminism, voice, self-expression, aging, community, mental health, music, empowerment

✿Guest: Vidya Rao

✿Takeaways

-Vidya Rao emphasizes the importance of voice in self-expression and healing.

-Aging is a beautiful process that brings wisdom and new opportunities.

-Community and connection are vital for emotional well-being.

-High-functioning depression can be challenging, but it is manageable with self-care.

-Music serves as a powerful tool for healing and connection.

-Navigating societal expectations requires courage and authenticity.

-Embracing one's identity is essential for personal growth.

-Vulnerability can lead to deeper connections with others.

-Life is uncertain, and acceptance of this uncertainty is crucial.

-The journey of self-discovery is ongoing and ever-evolving.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Vidya Rao: A Musical Journey

05:45 The Importance of Voice: Physical and Metaphorical

06:25 Becoming a Respected Artist: Vidya's Path

08:00 The Connection Between Body and Voice in Music

09:11 Vulnerability in Sharing Art: Overcoming Fear

11:26 The Healing Power of Music and Writing

12:30 Allowing imperfection and the gift of 'becoming'

13:09 The Role of Deadlines in Creativity

14:21 Tonglen Meditation

14:47 Overcoming Fear and Ignoring "Haters" with LOVE

16:25 Going against tradition

20:27 Exploring Feminism Through Music

22:44 Respectability, Self-expression and Feminism

24:14 Reclaiming one's totality and the erotic

25:11 Understanding the Form: Thumri and Its Meanings

26:05 Finding through Thumri: the earthly is spiritual

27:18 The Interconnection of Spirituality and Earthliness

28:12 The Wisdom of Kabir: The Earthen Pot

29:48 Kabir's Poem on 'The little Pot': The silence before anything

31:10 Embracing Imperfection and Human Experience

33:08 Navigating Emotions: The Dance of Life

39:15 Personal Struggles: Depression and Resilience

43:19 Lessons from the Pandemic: Uncertainty and Community

44:06 The Importance of Community

44:42 Self-Acceptance in Difficult Times

44:52 Navigating High Functioning Depression

45:23 The Gifts of Aging

46:00 Embracing Aging

47:57 The Wisdom of Experience

51:32 Lessons from Life's Journey

53:42 The Age of Understanding and Community

✿Connect with Zoe: www.avalotherapy.comhello@avalotherapy.comIG: @avalotherapy ✿Book a session with Zoe:⁠https://avalotherapy.janeapp.com/⁠

✿Connect with Vidya Rao: www.vidyaraosinger.com

Vidya's CD: http://www.amazon.in/dp/B00PH5KHMO

https://www.oklisten.com/vidyarao

https://tinyurl.com/y7244rhw

https://tinyurl.com/3sutd6ta

SONG CREDITS:Vidya's performance of Yeh Tan Thaat Tambure Ka is one of a series of uploads for Ajab Shahar, a webspace dedicated to mystic poem and song, created by the Kabir Project team (http://www.ajabshahar.org ; http://www.kabirproject.org).

Vocals: Vidya RaoTabla: Idries Khan Sarangi: Bharat Bhushan Goswami Translation: Vidya Rao Video Credits: Camera: Shabnam Virmani Sound: Fireflys Post-Sound, Mumbai Editing: Sharanya Gautam Sub-Titling: Shruti Kulkarni Collection: The Kabir Project

In this episode, Zoe and her comedian/ BIPOC advocate friends – Aliocha (educator), Arya (musician) and Katrina (artist and community organizer) – take you on a hilarious and thought-provoking journey where comedy, identity, and the immigrant experience collide. From using humour as a survival tool to cracking open hard truths, they dive deep into navigating cultural expectations, battling generational trauma, and facing that nagging imposter syndrome—especially in BIPOC communities. The group redefines success beyond the typical capitalist grind, celebrating the power of community and "lowercase love" instead of the usual metrics. Packed with laughs, raw insights, and moments of self-reflection, this episode is all about finding belonging, fulfillment, and the real meaning of success.

Guests: Aliocha Perriard Abdoh, Arya Afshar, and Katrina Esguerra!

✿Keywords

comedy, identity, immigrant experience, generational trauma, imposter syndrome, success, community, love, BIPOC, cultural expectations

✿Connect with Zoe:

www.avalotherapy.com

hello@avalotherapy.com

IG: @avalotherapy

✿Book a session with Zoe:

⁠https://avalotherapy.janeapp.com/⁠

✿Connect with our Guests (IG):

• Arya Afshar @aryaafsharm

• Katrina Esguerra @katrina_yvr

• Aliocha Perriard Abdoh @liochaabdoh
  

• ✿Takeaways

• Comedy serves as a tool for truth-telling and coping.

• Navigating identity involves balancing cultural expectations and personal truth.

• The immigrant experience is often marked by generational trauma.

• Imposter syndrome is influenced by external societal pressures.

• Success should be redefined beyond capitalist metrics.

• Community plays a crucial role in fostering love and connection.

• Lowercase love is often undervalued but essential for well-being.

• Self-reflection is necessary for understanding personal values.

• Cultural narratives shape our understanding of success and happiness.

• Finding belonging requires vulnerability and authenticity.
  

• ✿Chapters

• 00:00 Introduction and Background

• 02:46 The Power of Comedy

• 04:51 Navigating Dual Identities

• 07:49 Comedy as a Form of Expression

• 13:58 Challenges of Being BIPOC

• 20:12 The Role of Therapy

• 23:12 Navigating Family Dynamics

• 28:17 Navigating the Pressure to Fit In

• 29:53 Rest is Resistance

• 31:14 Redefining Success Based on Personal Values

• 36:40 The Power of Community and Lowercase Love

• 41:28 De-centering the Idea of a Perfect Partner

• 49:16 Listening to Your Body

• 50:30 The Balance Between Individualism and Community

• 52:16 Finding Joy and Peace in Authentic Relationships

• 53:06 The Challenges and Freedom of Immigrant Parents

• 54:03 Living for Oneself: Letting Go of Societal Expectations

• 54:33 Conclusion and Future Episodes

✿✿✿summary In this cosy conversation, therapists Zoe Ho and Jane Ngo explore the complexities of parental relationships, especially from BIPOC lived experiences, the emotional impact of childhood experiences, and the journey towards healing and self-acceptance. They discuss the importance of acknowledging feelings towards parents, the influence of cultural expectations, and the significance of reparenting oneself. They emphasize the need for embodiment, self-compassion, understanding, and community support in the healing process, while also addressing the challenges of letting go of blame and embracing personal growth. Special appearance by Ms. Coco, who is pawsome.

✿✿Connect with Zoe:

www.avalotherapy.com

hello@avalotherapy.com

IG: @avalotherapy

✿✿Book a session: https://avalotherapy.janeapp.com/

✿✿Connect with Jane:

IG: @maicounsellor_

✿✿✿keywords parenting, emotional healing, inner child, therapy, relationships, self-love, cultural influences, compassion, blame, personal growth, BIPOC ✿✿✿takeaways ✿Acknowledging feelings towards parents is crucial for healing. ✿Childhood experiences shape adult relationships significantly. ✿Cultural expectations can complicate parental relationships. ✿Healing requires compassion for oneself and one's parents. ✿Reparenting involves nurturing the inner child. ✿Letting go of blame is essential for personal freedom. ✿Community support plays a vital role in healing. ✿Understanding that parents are human and imperfect is important. ✿Grief is a natural response to unmet parental needs. ✿Finding one's own path to healing is a personal journey. titles ✿Navigating Parental Relationships: A Journey to Healing ✿Understanding the Impact of Childhood on Adult Life ✿✿✿Connect with Zoe: Book: www.avalotherapy.janeapp.com/ www.avalotherapy.com IG: @avalotherapy with Jane: IG: @maicounsellor_ Book: www.maicounselling.janeapp.com/ ✿✿✿Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Setting 06:59 The Intergenerational Gap and Changing World 08:55 The Importance of Education and Resources for Parents 15:36 Healing and Reparenting Through Therapy 23:53 Stuck in Blame 25:48 Embracing All Colors of Emotion 27:52 Witnessing and Validating Feelings 29:31 The Power of Emotions 32:12 No Bad Parts 34:46 Creating Space for Healing 36:54 Recognizing Parents' Limitations 39:32 Reframing Perspectives on Parents 41:16 Validation and Perspective 44:02 Navigating Family Dynamics and Personal Growth 44:54 The Impact of Family of Origin on Life Choices 45:36 Outro

✿Summary✿ In this episode of 'We All Got Problems', clinical counsellors Zoe Ho and Kristy Hourd delve into the complexities of autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and the lived experiences of autistic individuals. They discuss the challenges faced by those on the spectrum, including societal expectations, emotional sensitivity, and the importance of community support. Kristy shares her personal journey of understanding her own neurodivergence and emphasizes the strengths that come with being autistic. The conversation highlights the need for a more inclusive society that accommodates diverse sensory needs and reframes autism as a difference and a superhuman trait, rather than a deficit.

✿Connect with Zoe: www.avalotherapy.com hello@avalotherapy.com IG: @avalotherapy

✿Book a session with Zoe: https://avalotherapy.janeapp.com/ ✿Connect with Kristy: www.throughthecrackstherapy.com

✿keywords✿ autism, neurodivergence, emotional sensitivity, relationships, community, strengths, societal challenges, counseling, personal experiences, spectrum ✿takeaways✿ ✿Autism is a spectrum with diverse presentations. ✿Personal experiences can enhance understanding of autism. ✿Society often overlooks the needs of autistic individuals. ✿Emotional regulation can be challenging for those with autism. ✿Community support is crucial for autistic individuals. ✿Intuition plays a significant role in navigating life as an autistic person. ✿Creating comfortable environments can improve quality of life. ✿Autistic individuals often have unique strengths and abilities. ✿Reframing autism as a difference can reduce stigma. ✿An ideal world would be adaptable to various sensory needs. titles ✿Exploring the Spectrum of Autism ✿Understanding Neurodivergence and Its Challenges ✿Chapters✿ 00:00 Introduction and Overview 01:42 Understanding Autism: A Spectrum Disorder 04:54 Challenges Faced by Individuals with Autism 07:24 Sensory Sensitivities and Emotional Regulation in Autism 10:34 The Impact of Autism on Relationships 15:20 Recognizing and Supporting the Strengths of Individuals with Autism 19:21 Navigating Change and Collaboration 25:04 Harnessing the Power of Intuition 29:59 Creating a Supportive Sensory Environment 30:23 Working with Special Interests 33:03 Understanding and Accommodating Individual Needs 34:41 Challenges of Asking for Help 35:02 Community and Unmasking 37:13 Navigating Relationships 41:03 Understanding the Autism Spectrum 41:05 Creating an Adaptable Society 45:26 Counseling Autistics

Zoe and stand up comedian Andrea Feltrin dive into writing, humour, and personal growth. Discover the therapeutic aspects of journaling, community and queer comedy. Joking about perfectionism, vulnerability and how to mine one's trauma for gold, they navigate the challenges and joys of self-expression, ultimately celebrating embracing your unique narrative.

✿Connect with Zoe: www.avalotherapy.com hello@avalotherapy.com IG: @avalotherapy

✿Book a Session with Zoe: https://avalotherapy.janeapp.com/ ✿Connect with Andrea Feltrin: www.birdshtfilms.com IG: @andyfeltrin_

✿keywords

writing, humor, journaling, personal growth, stand-up comedy, vulnerability, creativity, community, narrative therapy, self-expression

✿takeaways:

• Writing can be a therapeutic outlet for self-expression.
• Humor plays a crucial role in processing emotions and experiences.
• Finding a balance between humor and seriousness is essential in writing.
• Vulnerability in writing can lead to personal growth and connection.
• Journaling helps in understanding and navigating one's feelings.
• Morning pages can serve as a powerful tool for creativity.
• Community support in comedy fosters a welcoming environment for artists.
• The transition from improv to stand-up can be a liberating experience.
• Embracing one's unique voice is vital in writing and performance.
• Writing should be enjoyable and free from the pressure of perfection.

• The Journey of Writing and Self-Expression
• The Role of Humor in Writing

✿soundbites

• "This is like the best podcast already."
• "You can be silly and professional, it is not interchangeable."
• "I think that actually feels like taking a big breath."

✿chapters

00:00. Introduction and meet Andrea Superstar Comic

04:19. Childhood dreams of Writing

08:46. Standup Bit: Federal Arts Org

09:30. Perfectionism and Creativity

11:09. Freeing self-expression

27:13. Standup Bit: Cheese

27:48. Community and Stand up

35:00. Finding Voice

50:24. Life chapters, Shame and Acceptance

56:13. New Chapter

58:14 Vulnerability Brings Closeness