-
Punpkins for Cheap
- A Grotesque Horror, Novelette
- Narrated by: Ronald Young
- Length: 1 hr and 28 mins
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Publisher's summary
Just in time for Halloween! Trick or treat?
The first story is the trick.
The second story is the treat.
Punpkins for Cheap
This book should never be listened to by anyone. It's gross and immature. It's almost as if a small child wrote it. If you enjoy poorly written dark humor, you might like this book. I mean, there's a chapter titled "Tampons Are Not Yummy". So use your imagination as to what kind of story this is.
This book will get bad reviews (if anyone ever listens to it). I expect that. If I had to review it, I would say it was the dumbest book I have ever heard/wrote. However, it does make me laugh. (Oh yeah, it's kinda gross too.) At least it's short.
Plus, it could be scary. What if maggots evolved and wanted to take over the world? A maggot has invaded Jimbo's brain. The maggot has plans to make baby maggots and sell them inside jack-o-lanterns.
Plus a bonus story titled "Them Bones".
"Them Bones" is the most disturbing story I have ever written. It is true body horror! Probably one of the most twisted and bloodiest stories I have ever written. No spoilers, but it's about a man who falls in love with a skeleton. The skeleton asks him to make her pretty.
Proceed with caution.
Mature audiences only two extreme short stories.
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When Heather McKinley dreamed of becoming a doctor, she imagined curing sick kids and sporting pink stethoscopes. She never anticipated the sleepless nights, grueling exams, and endless labs. And she certainly never knew that her medical school earned the nickname Dead Med thanks to the tragic history of students overdosing on illegal drugs. But Heather would never consider doing anything like that. That is, until her longtime boyfriend dumps her, she finds herself failing anatomy, and her world starts to crumble.
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Hmm
- By Morgan Meaux on 08-22-24
By: Freida McFadden
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Wynonna Earp
- Tales from Purgatory
- By: Emily Andras
- Narrated by: Melanie Scrofano, Tim Rozon, Dom Provost-Chalkley, and others
- Length: 4 hrs
- Original Recording
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Saddle up and join Wynonna Earp on an immersive new audio adventure in the gritty supernatural world of Purgatory. This Audible Original invites you deeper into the Weird West to follow Wynonna Earp (Melanie Scrofano), as she embarks on her craziest adventure yet: riding off into the sunset with her soulmate, Doc Holliday (Tim Rozon)—yes ... that Doc Holliday. Brace yourself for more wise-cracking demon hunters, earth-shattering revelations and all the genre-blending action you've come to expect from the cult hit TV series.
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Happy #Earper ☺️
- By Kate Skidmore on 10-17-24
By: Emily Andras
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George Orwell’s 1984
- An Audible Original adaptation
- By: George Orwell, Joe White - adaptation
- Narrated by: Andrew Garfield, Cynthia Erivo, Andrew Scott, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
- Original Recording
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It’s 1984, and life has changed beyond recognition. Airstrip One, formerly known as Great Britain, is a place where Big Brother is always watching, and nobody can hide. Except, perhaps, for Winston Smith. Whilst working at the Ministry of Truth, rewriting history, he secretly dreams of freedom. And in a world where love and sex are forbidden, where it’s hard to distinguish between friend and foe, he meets Julia and O’Brien and vows to rebel.
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A Revelation!
- By wotsallthisthen on 04-07-24
By: George Orwell, and others
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Starship Troopers
- By: Robert A. Heinlein
- Narrated by: R.C. Bray
- Length: 8 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Johnnie Rico never really intended to join up—and definitely not the infantry. But now that he’s in the thick of it, trying to get through combat training harder than anything he could have imagined, he knows everyone in his unit is one bad move away from buying the farm in the interstellar war the Terran Federation is waging against the Arachnids. Because everyone in the Mobile Infantry fights. And if the training doesn’t kill you, the Bugs are more than ready to finish the job.
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The definitive version!
- By Kristopher G. Hesson on 10-03-24
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Ghost Stories: Stephen Fry's Definitive Collection
- By: Stephen Fry, Washington Irving, M.R. James, and others
- Narrated by: Stephen Fry
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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As the days grow shorter and the temperature drops, Halloween approaches. Come, brave listener, pull up a chair, and spend some time with master storyteller Stephen Fry as he tells us some of his favourite ghost stories of all time, in truly terrifying spatial audio. From the headless horseman of Sleepy Hollow to the tortured spirits of M.R. James, from Edgar Allan Poe’s terrifying tale of a doppelganger to Charlotte Riddell’s Open Door that should definitely stay shut, join Stephen as he tells you some truly terrifying tales.
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Wonderful narration. Mediocre stories.
- By Michael Fuchs on 11-07-23
By: Stephen Fry, and others
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The Art of War
- By: Sun Tzu
- Narrated by: Aidan Gillen
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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The 13 chapters of The Art of War, each devoted to one aspect of warfare, were compiled by the high-ranking Chinese military general, strategist, and philosopher Sun-Tzu. In spite of its battlefield specificity, The Art of War has found new life in the modern age, with leaders in fields as wide and far-reaching as world politics, human psychology, and corporate strategy finding valuable insight in its timeworn words.
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The actual book The Art of War, not a commentary
- By Fred271 on 12-31-19
By: Sun Tzu
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Technically Speaking
- By: Michael Elliot
- Narrated by: Coco Jones, Keith Powers, Queen Latifah, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 50 mins
- Original Recording
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Oakland-bred LaVeesha “Vee” Gilliam (Coco Jones) is a determined single mother of an autistic son and a gifted aspiring coder. When Vee loses her job as a food-services worker at the onsite restaurant at Grapengine, a large Silicon Valley tech company, she’s unable to pay for her son’s much-needed specialized education. By a twist of fate, mistaken identity, and her tech skills, Vee meets Troy Wilson (Keith Powers), the company’s wealthy founder and CEO and a wunderkind in the tech industry, who believes that Vee is a college-educated techie who works at his company.
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Overdue Diverse Representation in Tech!
- By Jatai Pollock on 09-26-24
By: Michael Elliot
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Dracula [Audible Edition]
- By: Bram Stoker
- Narrated by: Alan Cumming, Tim Curry, Simon Vance, and others
- Length: 15 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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The modern audience hasn't had a chance to truly appreciate the unknowing dread that readers would have felt when reading Bram Stoker's original 1897 manuscript. Most modern productions employ campiness or sound effects to try to bring back that gothic tension, but we've tried something different. By returning to Stoker's original storytelling structure - a series of letters and journal entries voiced by Jonathan Harker, Dr. Van Helsing, and other characters - with an all-star cast of narrators, we've sought to recapture its originally intended horror and power.
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IS THAT NOT SO?
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 11-05-15
By: Bram Stoker
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Brain Damage
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Megan Tusing
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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As Charly struggles to recover from her brain injury, she begins to realize that the events of that fateful night are trapped in the damaged right side of her brain. Now, she must put the jigsaw pieces together to discover the identity of the man who tried to kill her...before he finishes the job he started.
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Who Else Laughed, Cried, and Shuddered?
- By Jennifer Chichester on 09-16-22
By: Freida McFadden
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Frankenstein
- By: Mary Shelley
- Narrated by: Dan Stevens
- Length: 8 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Narrator Dan Stevens ( Downton Abbey) presents an uncanny performance of Mary Shelley's timeless gothic novel, an epic battle between man and monster at its greatest literary pitch. In trying to create life, the young student Victor Frankenstein unleashes forces beyond his control, setting into motion a long and tragic chain of events that brings Victor to the very brink of madness. How he tries to destroy his creation, as it destroys everything Victor loves, is a powerful story of love, friendship, scientific hubris, and horror.
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ARE WE ALWAYS TO BE UNHAPPY?
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 01-28-16
By: Mary Shelley
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Fahrenheit 451
- By: Ray Bradbury
- Narrated by: Tim Robbins
- Length: 5 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family."
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Wish I Hadn't Cliff Noted This in High School
- By Joel on 03-27-17
By: Ray Bradbury
What listeners say about Punpkins for Cheap
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Becky
- 02-07-23
Gross and Discusting
Don't let the title - Punpkins - make you think this is a Halloween story for kids. It is not. A maggot taking over a live body. Planning to take over the world. Gross. Then the bonus story. A cop falls in love with a plastic skeleton and wants to make her happy any way she wants.
I listened to Audible version of this book. The narrator presented it very well.
It's funny. It's gross. It's disgusting. It's so entertaining. Thank goodness it's short.
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