https://youtu.be/ffhy1tIhsZ0 Auto-generated transcript:In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. All praise is due to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. And peace and blessings be upon the Prophet Muhammad, the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him many glories. And after him, my dear brother Umar, may Allah bless you. Umar is one of those who asks good questions and I, that is one of the reasons I love him. I love him for many other reasons. May Allah bless him, he is doing medicine now. And we hope Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala puts shifa in his hand, inshaAllah. And that he is able to help people all around the world. And Umar asked me two questions, as I said, he asked both questions. The first question he asked me was, in terms of marriage, how do you deal with marital conflict? You have a problem with your wife. I have a problem with my husband. What do you do? How do you deal with marital conflict? And the second question he asked was, what is the role of parents in a marital conflict? If there is a conflict, do the parents have a role? Should they have a role? And so on. What is the role of parents? Now, my answer is this, very simple. First and foremost, choose your conflicts. And the criterion of choice is, ask yourself, which is more important, the marriage or the conflict? And do it likewise. The problem happens because people pick the wrong fights. And they get themselves into a situation where even if you win the fight, you ask yourself, what did I really get? And you got nothing. You got nothing. In the process, you could have... You really put yourself in a situation where you would have destroyed or you had a good chance of destroying a perfectly good relationship. Now, that is a very stupid thing to do. That's a very stupid way of leading your life. So pick the conflict. And the second thing, as I already mentioned, is ask yourself, what is more important, the conflict, meaning winning the conflict, winning the argument or retaining the relationship? Sometimes it is a... You have to make the choice. And walking away from an argument is the best thing that you can do. Rasulullah mentioned in my hadith, he said that, I will guarantee a place in Jannah for the person who walks away from the argument, meaning he gives in even when he is right. So the question is, how much more important, because this hadith relates to a general situation, people situation, you and me situation, not necessarily a marriage situation. So if that is being said about this general situation, how much more important it is with regard to marriage? So ask yourself, is it worth arguing? And if it's not worth arguing, then don't argue. Leave it. Let your wife or your husband do whatever they want to do. Nothing is going to happen if they win the argument, if they do what they are doing, and you walk away from there. And I walk away, I don't mean make actually, you know, sort of stage a walkout. I mean just, just give in and say, okay, alhamdulillah, good for you. Do that. No problem. Leave it. Don't make a fuss. Don't sulk. You know, don't play these games. Because these games are, all of them without exception are destructive. Destructive to the relationship. So it's a very stupid thing to play games like that. So walk away and you will have a long and happy marriage. My principle with regard to my marriage is that as long as my wife does not want to do something which is against Islam, against the Sharia, I never say no. And alhamdulillah, I have a wife who will never do that. Her taqwa is better than mine, alhamdulillah. So she will never ask to do or want to do something which is against the Quran and Sunnah, against the Sharia. She is very particular about those things. So I have nothing to worry about. So I just say, yes, whatever you want to do, just do it. The bank book is in her hand. She is a co-signatory of the bank. I almost never go. She does the banking. My principle is very simple.
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