• 121 - Understanding Anger, Abuse and Violence
    Feb 22 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    Understanding the crucial distinction between anger, abuse and violence is essential for fostering healthier relationships. This episode of the Anger Secrets podcast delves into these concepts, highlighting that emotional abuse often leaves deeper scars than physical harm.

    Listeners will learn about the five main types of abuse and discover why taking responsibility for abusive behaviors is vital for personal growth and change.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Anger is an emotion while abuse and violence are actions that cause harm.
    • Understanding the distinction between feeling angry and acting abusively is crucial for relationships.
    • Emotional abuse can leave deeper scars than physical abuse, impacting mental health significantly.
    • Taking responsibility for abusive behaviors is the first step towards meaningful change and healing.
    • Seeking professional help for anger issues demonstrates courage and a desire for growth.
    • Recognising that abuse and violence are fundamentally the same can help address personal accountability.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    11 mins
  • 120 - 5 Tips To Resolve Relationship Conflict
    Feb 15 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    Navigating conflict in romantic relationships can be challenging, but it’s essential for building stronger connections. In this episode of the Anger Secrets podcast, host Alastair Duhs shares five proven tips to help couples manage disagreements constructively.

    By emphasising the importance of controlling anger, avoiding the urge to win arguments and focusing on understanding your partner’s perspective, you can transform heated discussions into opportunities for growth.

    Alastair also encourages listeners to choose their battles wisely, ensuring that not every issue becomes a contentious debate. With practical strategies and insights drawn from his extensive experience, this episode aims to empower individuals to create calmer, happier and more loving relationships.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Controlling your anger is crucial for resolving conflicts effectively in relationships.
    • The goal of disagreements should be understanding and resolution, not winning or losing.
    • Listen to your partner to understand their perspective, rather than crafting a rebuttal.
    • Establish mutual respect by setting ground rules for discussions to avoid destructive behavior.
    • Choose your battles wisely; not every issue requires a heated argument or discussion.
    • Practicing self-awareness and anger management techniques can lead to healthier relationships.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    9 mins
  • 119 - Time-Out Made Simple
    Feb 8 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    Taking a Time-Out is an effective tool for controlling your anger. In this episode of the Anger Secrets podcast you will learn how to use Time-Outs to step back and cool down before conflicts escalate.

    Host Alastair Duhs shares actionable tips for implementing Time-Out effectively in your relationship, ensuring both you and your partner feel respected and heard. Join Alastair as he provides insights from over 30 years of anger management experience, empowering you to create a calmer, happier and more loving relationships.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Taking a Time-Out is a conscious decision to step away and cool down before anger escalates.
    • Discuss Time-Out with your partner beforehand to ensure mutual understanding and effectiveness.
    • Recognise the signs of rising anger to take a Time-Out before it leads to conflict.
    • During a Time-Out, engage in calming activities like mindfulness or listening to soothing music.
    • Communicate clearly when taking a Time-Out and avoid blaming your partner for your feelings.
    • Upon returning from a Time-Out, prioritise repairing the relationship and deciding how to address the issue.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    11 mins
  • 118 - How To Be Happier
    Feb 1 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    Are you ready to break free from anger and discover true happiness? This episode introduces the powerful ETFA model, which emphasises that it's not the events in life that trigger anger, but rather your thoughts about those events.

    Podcast host Alastair Duhs shares how changing your perspective can lead to greater calmness and understanding, ultimately enhancing your emotional well-being. You'll also learn two transformative habits that can significantly boost your happiness levels.

    By applying these strategies, you can take control of your anger, foster healthier relationships, and embrace a happier and more fulfilling life.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Changing your thoughts about events will alter your feelings and reactions.
    • The ETFA model teaches that it's not events that create anger, but your thoughts about them.
    • Practicing gratitude can greatly enhance your overall happiness levels.
    • Generosity towards others can lead to increased happiness for both you and them.
    • By focusing on what you appreciate in life, you can shift your emotional state.
    • Engaging in acts of kindness can create a positive feedback loop of happiness.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    10 mins
  • 117 - When Anger Controls Your Life, Here's How to Take It Back
    Jan 25 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    When anger controls your life, here's how to take it back: Tony's story is a powerful journey that illustrates that confronting anger is not only possible but essential for personal transformation and healthier relationships.

    After a troubling incident that left his wife fearful, Tony realised he needed to address his anger issues for his sake and that of his future children. Through the Complete Anger Management System, he discovered valuable tools and insights that shifted his perspective and helped him take control of his emotions.

    This episode offers real-life examples and actionable strategies for anyone struggling with anger, emphasising that with the right mindset and support, change is achievable.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Recognising the impact of your anger on loved ones is the first step towards change.
    • Seeking help for anger issues will significantly improve your relationships and quality of life.
    • Effective anger management requires self-reflection, understanding the effects of your behavior and commitment.
    • Engaging in group sessions provides valuable perspectives and reduces feelings of isolation during recovery.
    • Learning to view situations from others' perspectives can help de-escalate potential conflicts.
    • Taking small, consistent steps toward managing anger can lead to lasting, positive transformations.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    18 mins
  • 116 - How To Stop Getting Angry
    Jan 18 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    Are you tired of feeling overwhelmed by anger? Discover how to regain control of your anger with three transformative steps that will help you manage anger effectively.

    This episode of the Anger Secrets podcast delves into recognising the physical, emotional, and cognitive signs of anger and emphasises that awareness is the first crucial step toward change.

    Podcast host Alastair Duhs also shares practical strategies for reshaping your thoughts and communicating calmly, ensuring that anger does not escalate into conflict. By applying these techniques, you can foster healthier relationships and create a more peaceful environment for yourself and those around you.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Awareness of your physical and emotional signs of anger is crucial for management.
    • Recognising that your thoughts drive your anger helps you regain control over it.
    • Effective communication involves using 'I' statements to express feelings without blame.
    • Taking a moment to pause before reacting can prevent escalations in conflict.
    • Recognising the impact of your thoughts allows for healthier emotional responses to triggers.
    • Practicing active listening during disagreements fosters understanding and reduces anger.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    13 mins
  • 115 - How Forgiveness Can Change Your Life
    Jan 11 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    Forgiveness is one of the most powerful tools for healing and personal growth. Letting go of anger and resentment not only frees others but also liberates yourself.

    In this episode of the Anger Secrets podcast, host Alastair Duhs explores the profound impact of holding onto past hurts and offers seven actionable tips to help listeners navigate the challenging journey of forgiveness.

    From understanding the burden of anger to practicing empathy and communicating feelings, each tip is designed to empower you to reclaim your emotional well-being.

    With practical insights drawn from over 30 years of experience, this episode aims to motivate and inspire you to take control of your emotions and transform your relationships.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Holding onto anger is like drinking poison; it harms you more than anyone else.
    • Forgiveness is a choice that can lead to profound personal healing and growth.
    • Practicing empathy allows you to understand the motivations behind hurtful actions.
    • Letting go of the need for revenge opens the door to healing and personal freedom.
    • Communicating your feelings can help release the weight of bottled-up emotions.
    • Focusing on the present empowers you to create a better future for yourself.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    12 mins
  • 114 - Breaking the Cycle: Angela's Journey Beyond Anger
    Jan 4 2025

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    Anger can feel like an inescapable cycle, especially for those who have grown up in environments where conflict and frustration are commonplace. In this episode, host Alastair Duhs shares the powerful journey of Angela, a mother struggling with anger management in the wake of her upbringing in a volatile household.

    Angela reveals how her father's short temper shaped her understanding of anger, including a gradual realisation that her own reactions were negatively impacting her children and marriage.

    The episode uncovers the transformative steps Angela has taken by participating in the Complete Anger Management System, illustrating that change is not just possible, but within reach for those determined to break free from the past.

    Key Takeaways:

    • Angela's journey highlights that change is possible, regardless of your upbringing or past.
    • Understanding the different forms of anger can help in managing emotional responses effectively.
    • Recognising the impact of anger on relationships is crucial for personal transformation.
    • Taking the first step towards anger management can lead to a calmer, happier life.
    • Mindfulness in communication helps to prevent escalation during conflicts with loved ones.
    • Breaking the cycle of anger and abuse involves conscious effort and commitment to change.

    Links referenced in this episode:

    For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

    For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.

    To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.

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    14 mins