The Book of Dog: A Satire
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Narrated by:
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Scott Aiello
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By:
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D.J. Molles
About this listen
When their peoples mysteriously vanish, a pair of faithful dogs must work with their foul-mouthed feline friend to discover why, and how to bring them back home.
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Banger and Mash knew something strange was happening when their peoples’ scent began to fade. Sweetpea the cat knew it too, but…you know…he just wasn’t that worried about it. But when their human vanishes into thin air right before their noses, they race to get help from the other dogs in the village, only to discover that EVERYONE'S humans have disappeared.
Banger, a rescue with a traumatic past, convinces the other dogs that they must have done something Very Bad to incur this terrible punishment. Determined to become Perfect Dogs to entice the humans to return to them, a draconian system of laws is put into place to keep dogs from doing anything that might be seen as Bad—no more eating trash, no more sleeping on the couch, and definitely no humping. Sweetpea is more than happy to use his prodigious feline memory to help them keep track of their ever-more-complicated rules…so long as they refer to him as His Masterfulness, and pay him homage.
Mash, on the other hand, is not so sure that they’re going about it the right way. He wants to be a Good Dog, but he’s pretty sure that the whole reason the peoples loved them in the first place was because they were…well…dogs.
As differing philosophies give rise to conflict amongst the canines, a new theory of how they should behave arises from an unlikely source: Sweetpea--AKA, His Masterfulness--who is either the only cat capable of hearing the voice of the peoples…or maybe he’s just going crazy.
Satire and metaphysics come together in this humorous and often heartwarming tale about our four-legged friends, and how love conquers all.
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- By Been there on 11-23-24
By: Elvis Costello
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The Great Indoors
- By: Ginny Hogan
- Narrated by: Mae Whitman
- Length: 3 hrs and 53 mins
- Original Recording
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Alice's journey begins as all good journeys do: hitting on the sales guy at REI. After a tumultuous breakup, a quick career transition, family upheaval, and a sobriety journey that didn't fix her life quite as much as she expected it to, Alice decides that the only way to solve all her problems is to hike the Pacific Crest Trail. But as she begins preparing for the months-long quest, she realizes the answers she's seeking might not be on top of a snow-covered mountain. Especially since she just learned there was snow in California.
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Chuck full of laughs to lift anyone's spirits.
- By Laura Boogaert on 09-22-24
By: Ginny Hogan
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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Very Unbecoming
- By: Emily Kron, Kate Hopkins
- Narrated by: Zoë Chao, Esther Povitsky, Amy Sedaris
- Length: 4 hrs and 31 mins
- Original Recording
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When two childhood best friends blow up their respective romantic relationships, they make a time-sensitive pact: serial-cheater Chuck cannot sleep with anyone as she attends a three-month-long recovery group for cheaters, while sex-deprived Sofia vows to hook up with as many people as possible before recommitting to monogamy and tying the knot with her long-time fiancé. To keep things interesting, Chuck and Sofia decide to revive a past tradition from their summer camp days—also known as the dawning of sluthood.
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Hilarious
- By Rachel on 11-21-24
By: Emily Kron, and others
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American Psycho
- By: Bret Easton Ellis
- Narrated by: Pablo Schreiber
- Length: 16 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Patrick Bateman moves among the young and trendy in 1980s Manhattan. Young, handsome, and well educated, Bateman earns his fortune on Wall Street by day while spending his nights in ways we cannot begin to fathom. Expressing his true self through torture and murder, Bateman prefigures an apocalyptic horror that no society could bear to confront.
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Fanntastic book but maybe not for everyone....
- By So Fain on 03-27-11
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The Perfect Find
- By: Tia Williams
- Narrated by: Wesleigh Siobhan
- Length: 11 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Jenna Jones, former It-girl fashion editor, is broke and desperate for a second chance. When she’s dumped by her longtime fiancé and fired from Darling magazine, she begs for a job from her old arch nemesis, Darcy Vale. The beyond-bitchy publisher of StyleZine.com, Darcy agrees to hire her rival - only because her fashion site needs a jolt from Jenna’s old school cred. But Jenna soon realizes she’s in over her head.
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A-FREAKING-MAZING!!!
- By Bernadette on 05-30-21
By: Tia Williams
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Heads Will Roll
- By: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne
- Narrated by: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne, Tim Gunn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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Heads Will Roll is an Audible Original from Saturday Night Live star Kate McKinnon and her cocreator/costar (and real-life sister) Emily Lynne. Produced by Broadway Video, this is not an audiobook - it’s a 10-episode, star-studded audio comedy that features performances from Meryl Streep, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, Queer Eye’s Fab Five, and so many more. Please note: This content is not for kids.
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More like this please
- By Anon893 on 05-03-19
By: Kate McKinnon, and others
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Breakfast of Champions
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: John Malkovich
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Breakfast of Champions (1973) provides frantic, scattershot satire and a collage of Vonnegut's obsessions. His recurring cast of characters and American landscape was perhaps the most controversial of his canon; it was felt by many at the time to be a disappointing successor to Slaughterhouse-Five, which had made Vonnegut's literary reputation.
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Kurt Was Right to Grade This a C
- By Dubi on 01-10-16
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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In a steel-and-lead-encased bunker 20 feet below the basement level of his house, a soldier waits for his final orders. On the surface, a plague ravages the planet, infecting over 90% of the populace. The bacterium burrows through the brain, destroying all signs of humanity and leaving behind little more than base, prehistoric instincts. The infected turn into hyper-aggressive predators, with an insatiable desire to kill and feed. Someday soon, the soldier will have to open the hatch to his bunker, and step out into this new wasteland, to complete his mission....
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Trying to escape a lifetime of regrets—and outrun his own demons—veteran soldier Lochled Thatcher embarks on the Fourth Crusade to Leftland, a country rich in magic. Desperate to save her brothers, Rony joins Lochled’s squad only to discover that war is very different from all the songs and fancy speeches. As politics and power clash, Kayna, a Seeker, and Ord, a priest of the Church of Alchemy, find their foundations of loyalty and faith shaken and crumbling. In this theater of chaos, magic, and treachery, soldier and priest alike will find their humanity in as much danger as their lives.
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Interesting premise, but slow
- By Matthew Explosion on 08-24-24
By: D.J. Molles
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Wolves
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Ten years after the collapse, Huxley has built a good life again. He has a loving wife, a farm with fields of golden barley, and a daughter with a strange and wonderful gift. Then the slavers come. Working out in the fields during the attack, Huxley returns too late. His daughter has been taken, and his wife is bleeding out, her last whispered words about a man with a scorpion tattoo on his neck. Where do the slavers go? Huxley has no idea. He knows only that they head east, and so will he, setting out on foot across the desert of the Wastelands.
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Brilliant. I do have one criticism.
- By Billy on 09-04-16
By: D. J. Molles
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When the World Goes Quiet
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- By: Gian Sardar
- Narrated by: Jesse Vilinsky
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
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It’s 1918 in German-occupied Bruges, Belgium. With luck, Evelien will make it to the end of the war and be given what she was promised: a prized painting in exchange for safeguarding her employer’s possessions. Until then, Evelien knows to keep her head down and stay out of trouble. But life never goes to plan, especially in war. A member of the Resistance approaches Evelien: steal a list of names hidden in her employer’s home.
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Brilliantly connected every thread of the story
- By JoAnn Ollila on 03-31-24
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In the serene backdrop of New Hampshire's Franconia Notch, Micah Taylor, an ex-Army Ranger, finds solace with his loyal golden retriever, Grover. Their peaceful existence is suddenly shattered when a first date with his old friend, Jess Bender, takes an unexpected turn. Bright lights descend from the sky, leading them into the dark woods and a shocking discovery: the Kylonari, an advanced alien species with a special connection to Micah, here on a quest to find "The Lost Tribe"—a colony that vanished millennia ago.
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What a Fun Ride!
- By CarterFSU on 08-22-24
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The King of Diamonds
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As a string of high-profile jewel thefts went unsolved during the Swinging Sixties, the press dubbed the elusive thief the King of Diamonds. Like Cary Grant in To Catch a Thief, the King was so bold that he tip-toed into the homes of millionaires while they were home, hiding in their closets and daring to smoke while they were sleeping. Rena Pederson, then a young reporter with UPI, started following the elusive thief while she managed the night desk. With gymnastic skill, he climbed trees and crawled across rooftops to take jewels from heiresses, oil kings, corporate CEOs.
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Grew Up In Dallas? This one’s for you!
- By Claire P. on 07-22-24
By: Rena Pederson
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The Remaining
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- Length: 8 hrs and 39 mins
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In a steel-and-lead-encased bunker 20 feet below the basement level of his house, a soldier waits for his final orders. On the surface, a plague ravages the planet, infecting over 90% of the populace. The bacterium burrows through the brain, destroying all signs of humanity and leaving behind little more than base, prehistoric instincts. The infected turn into hyper-aggressive predators, with an insatiable desire to kill and feed. Someday soon, the soldier will have to open the hatch to his bunker, and step out into this new wasteland, to complete his mission....
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Die Hard Meets 28 Days Later
- By G Wallace on 01-10-14
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A Harvest of Ash and Blood
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Interesting premise, but slow
- By Matthew Explosion on 08-24-24
By: D.J. Molles
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Overall
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Ten years after the collapse, Huxley has built a good life again. He has a loving wife, a farm with fields of golden barley, and a daughter with a strange and wonderful gift. Then the slavers come. Working out in the fields during the attack, Huxley returns too late. His daughter has been taken, and his wife is bleeding out, her last whispered words about a man with a scorpion tattoo on his neck. Where do the slavers go? Huxley has no idea. He knows only that they head east, and so will he, setting out on foot across the desert of the Wastelands.
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Brilliant. I do have one criticism.
- By Billy on 09-04-16
By: D. J. Molles
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When the World Goes Quiet
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- By: Gian Sardar
- Narrated by: Jesse Vilinsky
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It’s 1918 in German-occupied Bruges, Belgium. With luck, Evelien will make it to the end of the war and be given what she was promised: a prized painting in exchange for safeguarding her employer’s possessions. Until then, Evelien knows to keep her head down and stay out of trouble. But life never goes to plan, especially in war. A member of the Resistance approaches Evelien: steal a list of names hidden in her employer’s home.
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Brilliantly connected every thread of the story
- By JoAnn Ollila on 03-31-24
By: Gian Sardar
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- By: Jeremy Robinson
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In the serene backdrop of New Hampshire's Franconia Notch, Micah Taylor, an ex-Army Ranger, finds solace with his loyal golden retriever, Grover. Their peaceful existence is suddenly shattered when a first date with his old friend, Jess Bender, takes an unexpected turn. Bright lights descend from the sky, leading them into the dark woods and a shocking discovery: the Kylonari, an advanced alien species with a special connection to Micah, here on a quest to find "The Lost Tribe"—a colony that vanished millennia ago.
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What a Fun Ride!
- By CarterFSU on 08-22-24
By: Jeremy Robinson
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The King of Diamonds
- The Search for the Elusive Texas Jewel Thief
- By: Rena Pederson
- Narrated by: Erin Dion
- Length: 13 hrs and 42 mins
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Performance
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Story
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What listeners say about The Book of Dog: A Satire
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- G Stewart
- 02-25-24
Thought and emotion provoking
I had no expectations when I started this book but was sucked in immediately. This book brought out so many emotions and thoughts about my interactions with my beloved furry friends and my people interactions as well. It is a wonderful book which I hope you enjoy as much as I did.
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- AZgma
- 07-29-24
Wonderful story!
Great narration. Very interesting story. I’m not crying, you’re crying 😢 Makes you want to hold your own pets tighter.
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- Erin Pritchett
- 03-10-24
I couldn't stop listening!
As with all of D.J. Molles' books, this one was so well written and amazing, I just couldn't stop listening to it. I love all of the characters and the journey they go through, a few places had my eyes leaking, both from laughter and from emotions. Scott Aiello is an exceptional narrator, perfect for this book. This is a must buy, you will be pleased you did!
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- Cathy King
- 12-20-23
Wonderful
I loved this book. Mash is a very good dog just trying to do the right thing in a strange new world. When all the peoples left some dogs tried to be perfect to bring them back. Some dogs hid their pain by acting like the peoples never loved them anyway so they threw out all the rules! Mash was banished for not taking sides but he was trying to do The Right Thing.
Living in the woods, Sweetpea the opinionated cat became his best and only friend. Sweetpea knew that neither pack’s side had it right, too.
Mash sticks to his path, Sweetpea follows her path and the lessons they learn will make you laugh and cry. Sometimes all at once.
You need to see where their paths lead. It’s a wonderful tale! Is it too much to hope for a sequel?!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Johnathan Breeland
- 03-11-24
Funny and Heart warming
first off I can't believe that the guy that wrote the remaining Universe wrote this book but I'm so glad that he did it's a breath of fresh air to go from reading some of the dark books that I read to reading this that is just so funny and heartwarming this Guy knows how to write a book and get you invested after listening to this I don't think there's a book that he'll put out that I won't check out you will laugh you will cry and you will have a good time doing it read it
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- Scott M.
- 01-18-24
Great book everyone should listen
What a great story that the world needs to hear thanks DJ we need more people like you
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- Paul G. Peppers
- 01-04-24
The cat was funny.
I found the parts where the cat was lead character very funny. the narrator captured the essence of cat.
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- Zack
- 01-04-24
Fun and Heartwarming Tale of Cats and Dogs!
What happens when all the peoples disappear and dogs and cats are left to their own devices?
This book answers that question and then some!
Not gonna lie, this book hit me in the feels as many times as it made me laugh! Amazing change of pace by Molles and a fun, refreshing story to have in your library. Interesting human parallels and absolutely spot on species specific behavioral accuracy! Narration was perfection (Again, species specific accuracy at its finest).
A must have for dog and cat lovers alike!
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- Jarad
- 01-15-24
Damn!!!
What a story! Hilarious and much more emotional than I expected. I love the other series by Molles, but this is far different from his other styles. Great performance as well! Sweetpea was my favorite!
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- Anonymous User
- 02-15-24
Love it!
The story is amazing! It's so well told, I couldn't put it down. The narrator did the best job of narrating and portraying each character. So much so that I could distinguish who was speaking even without him saying who was speaking. All in all 10 out of 10!
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