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Life on Delay

By: John Hendrickson
Narrated by: George Newbern
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Publisher's summary

A NEW YORKER BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR • USA TODAY BOOK CLUB PICK • ONE OF AUDIBLE'S BEST BIOS AND MEMOIRS OF 2023 • “A raw, intimate look at [Hendrickson's] life with a stutter. It’s a profoundly moving book that will reshape the way you think about people living with this condition.”—Esquire • A candid memoir about a lifelong struggle to speak.

Life On Delay brims with empathy and honesty . . . It moved me in ways that I haven’t experienced before. It’s fantastic.”—Clint Smith, author of the #1 New York Times bestseller How the Word Is Passed

“I can’t remember the last time I read a book that made me want to both cry and cheer so much, often at the same time.”—Robert Kolker, best-selling author of Hidden Valley Road

In the fall of 2019, John Hendrickson wrote a groundbreaking story for The Atlantic about Joe Biden’s decades-long journey with stuttering, as well as his own. The article went viral, reaching listeners around the world and altering the course of Hendrickson’s life. Overnight, he was forced to publicly confront an element of himself that still caused him great pain.

He soon learned he wasn’t alone with his feelings: strangers who stutter began sending him their own personal stories, something that continues to this day. Now, in this reported memoir, Hendrickson takes us deep inside the mind and heart of a stutterer as he sets out to answer lingering questions about himself and his condition that he was often too afraid to ask.

In Life on Delay, Hendrickson writes candidly about bullying, substance abuse, depression, isolation, and other issues stutterers like him face daily. He explores the intricate family dynamics surrounding his own stutter and revisits key people from his past in unguarded interviews. Listeners get an over-the-shoulder view of his childhood; his career as a journalist, which once seemed impossible; and his search for a romantic partner. Along the way, Hendrickson guides us through the evolution of speech therapy, the controversial quest for a “magic pill” to end stuttering, and the burgeoning self-help movement within the stuttering community. Beyond his own experiences, he shares portraits of fellow stutterers who have changed his life, and he writes about a pioneering doctor who is upending the field of speech therapy.

Life on Delay is an indelible account of perseverance, a soulful narrative about not giving up, and a glimpse into the process of making peace with our past and present selves.

©2023 John Hendrickson (P)2023 Random House Audio
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Critic reviews

“Hendrickson has cultivated an undeniable gift for concise metaphors, distilling potentially long-winded explanations into memorable images, briskly delivered. . . . He movingly describes not only his own experience of trying to speak to others but also his constant awareness of their experience of him. . . . All of this is seamlessly recounted, threading together science and emotion, ideas and experience.”—Jennifer Szalai, The New York Times

“Mold-breaking . . . Astutely illuminates the complexity of disfluency . . . Life on Delay recasts stuttering and, in doing so, challenges long-standing attitudes toward disability. By drawing deftly from personal experience, research, others’ stories and his wellspring of empathy, Hendrickson transforms the disorder he avoided claiming for decades into an invitation to all of us to demonstrate genuine humanity. . . . This full-hearted memoir grapples with shame, resentment and fear as Hendrickson answers with courage and compassion one of the most meaningful questions in life: ‘How do you accept an aspect of yourself that you’re taught at such an early age to hate?’”—Anna Leahy, The Washington Post

“[A] moving exploration . . . A wealth of fascinating detail . . . But the real draw lies in [Hendrickson’s] account of his personal experiences, which convey something essential about the challenge of being human.”The New Yorker

What listeners say about Life on Delay

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Way to go john I really enjoyed it

Hey John, I just want to let you know I really enjoyed your book. I cried and laughed and I have a whole new appreciation for people who stutter. Thanks to you and this book.

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a moving must-listen!

A wonderful debut memoir that also has a significant amount of reportage, utilizing John's skills as a reporter and journalist. Quite moving in many scenes from childhood through adulthood—understanding the struggles and shame that anyone with a stutter lives with—and ultimately inspiring tale about how to heal family fissures through communication and empathy. In the chapter that details The Look, everyone will feel implicated, but it's not about casting blame, but rather being transparent and finding understanding. At his book launch in New York City, I asked him about the narration and he said he worked with George Newbern to help "teach him to stutter" in the parts that required that. Highly recommend!

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True but an error.

The error is with regard to stammering for the rest of your life. As a child, I was 0% fluent. At the age of 26, I went to Seattle Speech and Hearing - became 100% fluent! Within weeks, my back stiffened to the point I had to sleep sitting upright. Stress manifests itself in different ways and my stress caused me to stammer. My speech settled into 70% or so of fluency.

After reading this book, I decided not to stammer anymore!!! And I don’t!

Great book and story. Brought back the terror of being young and having a stammer.

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Great Read

Highly recommend and enjoyed every minute of this book. An eye opener for sure.

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An honest look at living life as a stutterer

John's transparency took an amazing amount of courage. So many stutterers spend their lives living as invisible as they can. Open discussion is so much better.

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Do NOT miss this book! Even if you dont stutter

Even if you don't stutter, or don't think you know someone who does (you are wrong, they just hide it well) As a former/current stutterer I got tired of how clinical any book on the topic was...this one informative AND entertaining, taking you inside what it is like to stutter beyond the the non-fluid speech and gesturing that you can see. It is warm and engaging yet you can feel the very real pain and frustrations...simple things like not ordering what you want on a menu because you will stutter (or just pointing to it for the waiter) Just get this book!

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An excellent portrayal of the affliction

As a rehabilitation professional, I have dealt with all types of disabilities. This is a great portrayal of a person that has dealt with the affliction of being a stutter or their entire life. What I liked the most was how he noticed that President Biden has not overcome his stuttering. He is a stutterer.

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very personal from many people

nothing about the medications that help speech dysfluencies in adults nor enough about preventing children 3-6 years old from contining normal dysfluencies by the effective technique : look, listen, stay silent and patient while the children talk. No corrections nor comments. Silent attentive listening works in the vast majority of pre-6 yr dysfluencies, let alone doing the same in non dysfluent older persons' conversation!

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MY Life on Delay

I’m a 71 year old woman who accepted a lesser life because of my stutter. I, too, wanted to be a journalist but I really wanted to be an actress. I gave up before I started.
At 62 years old, I got up on my first stage as a personal storyteller. The shame of my stutter was compounded by the fact that I was a moderate stutterer and castigated myself for not being able to summon the courage to live the life I wanted. As a kid I realized dogs would be my salvation and finally wrote about it—14 Dogs and Me: One Woman’s Story of Never Saying No. It wasn’t until then when I realized how much I relied on dogs to help me navigate this world. (No, I was not a hoarder. I had 14 dogs over a lifetime.)
Page after page, I heard the words that could’ve come out of my mouth. How I felt about myself and my feelings of low self-worth, not answering the phone, not believing I had a place in the world. It all came rushing back but in a good way. Thank you, John.

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Must read

Dear John, thank you for writing this book. My son is a person who stutters, while I am someone who has always had a quick, sharp tongue. It is not hard to love my son, and I love everything about him. It can sometimes be hard to understand what it must be like for him to live in a family of fast-talkers. He isn’t quite old enough yet to receive much feedback from the broader world, but I know it’s coming. Your book was a valuable window into his world, including challenges he may face in the future, and ways I can do better as his parent. This book is for everyone, thank you for writing it.

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