Alexandra Petri's US History
Important American Documents (I Made Up)
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Narrated by:
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Alexandra Petri
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By:
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Alexandra Petri
About this listen
A witty, absurdist satire of the last 500 years, Alexandra Petri's US History is the fake textbook you never knew you needed!
Alexandra Petri's US History contains a lost (invented!) history of America. (A history for people disappointed that the only president whose weird sex letters we have is Warren G. Harding.) Petri's "historical fan fiction" draws on real events and completely absurd fabrications to create a laugh-out-loud, irreverent takedown of our nation's complicated past.
On Petri's deranged timeline, John and Abigail Adams try sexting, the March sisters from Little Women are sixty feet tall, and Susan Sontag goes to summer camp. Nearly eighty short, hilarious pieces span centuries of American history and culture. Nikola Tesla's friends stage an intervention when he falls in love with a pigeon. The characters from Sesame Street invade Normandy. And Mark Twain—who famously said reports of his death had been greatly exaggerated—offers a detailed account of his undeath, in which he becomes a zombie.
This side-splitting work of historical humor shows why Alexandra Petri has been hailed as a "genius," a "national treasure," and "one of the funniest writers alive."
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Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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American Psycho
- By: Bret Easton Ellis
- Narrated by: Pablo Schreiber
- Length: 16 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Patrick Bateman moves among the young and trendy in 1980s Manhattan. Young, handsome, and well educated, Bateman earns his fortune on Wall Street by day while spending his nights in ways we cannot begin to fathom. Expressing his true self through torture and murder, Bateman prefigures an apocalyptic horror that no society could bear to confront.
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Fanntastic book but maybe not for everyone....
- By So Fain on 03-27-11
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The Perfect Find
- By: Tia Williams
- Narrated by: Wesleigh Siobhan
- Length: 11 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Jenna Jones, former It-girl fashion editor, is broke and desperate for a second chance. When she’s dumped by her longtime fiancé and fired from Darling magazine, she begs for a job from her old arch nemesis, Darcy Vale. The beyond-bitchy publisher of StyleZine.com, Darcy agrees to hire her rival - only because her fashion site needs a jolt from Jenna’s old school cred. But Jenna soon realizes she’s in over her head.
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A-FREAKING-MAZING!!!
- By Bernadette on 05-30-21
By: Tia Williams
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Breakfast of Champions
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: John Malkovich
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Breakfast of Champions (1973) provides frantic, scattershot satire and a collage of Vonnegut's obsessions. His recurring cast of characters and American landscape was perhaps the most controversial of his canon; it was felt by many at the time to be a disappointing successor to Slaughterhouse-Five, which had made Vonnegut's literary reputation.
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Kurt Was Right to Grade This a C
- By Dubi on 01-10-16
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Black Friend
- Essays
- By: Ziwe
- Narrated by: Ziwe
- Length: 4 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Ziwe made a name for herself by asking guests like Alyssa Milano, Fran Lebowitz, and Chet Hanks direct questions. In Black Friend, she turns her incisive perspective on both herself and the culture at large. Throughout the book, Ziwe combines pop-culture commentary and personal stories that grapple with her own (mis)understanding of identity. From a hilarious case of mistaken identity via a jumbotron to a terrifying fight-or-flight encounter in the woods, Ziwe raises difficult questions for comedic relief.
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Something for everyone
- By Happy on 10-21-23
By: Ziwe
What listeners say about Alexandra Petri's US History
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Georgia Shopper
- 01-20-24
Hilarious and bizarrely educational
Alexandra Petri writes a column for the Washington Post, where she regularly makes me laugh, sigh, and cringe at the goings-on in the world. In short, I was a rabid fan before I bought this book. However, while istening to this book, I heard her speak for the first time! Now I will forever read her columns and hear them in her actual voice (a GOOD thing). This book was amazing in two ways--first, it is very, very funny, but in a nerdy kind of way. It helps if you know a little about history and literature, or are willing to do a quick Google so you're in on the jokes. Second, for a book containing so much made-up history, it was pretty darned educational. I was constantly thinking "that fact must be made up" and Googling to check (often finding that it was, indeed, the part that was NOT made up). Alexandra has a way of mocking events while not substantially changing the record of what happened. While I loved hearing the book in the author's voice, I am also going to buy and read the Kindle version. Some portions of the book seem to be visual and difficult to convey via narration. I think this book needs to include both the audio and the written formats so it may be enjoyed by as many senses as possible!
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