What happens when your own body becomes your enemy? In this powerful conversation, therapist and PhD researcher IJ Asike shares her extraordinary journey living with lupus - an autoimmune disease where the body's defense systems attack its own tissues and organs.

From unexplained childhood illnesses to finally receiving a diagnosis at age 26, IJ reveals the physical and emotional toll of navigating a condition that can affect everything from her joints to her kidneys, creating unpredictable limitations that transform daily life. "Sometimes I wake up feeling fine, but by 10am, I'm at 15% battery," she explains.

Beyond the medical aspects, IJ offers profound wisdom about the psychological and spiritual dimensions of chronic illness. She shares her process of pain, acceptance, adaptation, and growth - challenging common misconceptions about what acceptance means. "Acceptance isn't giving up faith," she insists. "It's a point you arrive at that allows you to adapt and see new possibilities." This perspective transformed her experience from one where "life stopped" to discovering unexpected purpose through her condition.

The conversation explores how faith, medical support, family connections, and finding meaning beyond illness create the foundation for flourishing despite physical limitations. IJ's research examines the crucial question: what factors determine whether someone with chronic illness merely survives or genuinely thrives?

For anyone navigating chronic illness, supporting a loved one with health challenges, or simply seeking inspiration for life's unexpected difficulties, IJ's story demonstrates how adversity can become a pathway to deeper authenticity. As she poignantly puts it: "My healing is not the absence of lupus - my healing is having the support I need to live meaningfully with it."

Join us for this transformative discussion about finding strength, purpose and authentic living when life doesn't follow your original plan. Share your own experiences or questions in the comments!

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Dad coach Jube Ojomo shares insights on men's mental health, highlighting how childhood experiences shape fatherhood and emotional processing patterns in men.

• Growing up in Nigeria with structured discipline and family traditions that influenced his own parenting style
• Transforming his parenting approach after his daughter was diagnosed with special needs
• Teaching his daughters accountability by allowing them to respectfully call out his emotional responses
• Navigating multiple crises simultaneously while lacking mentors to process emotions with
• The challenge of emotional numbness in men and its connection to mental health issues
• Why men need male-only support groups to process emotions safely
• Creating value-based meetups that focus on skill-sharing and meaningful connection
• The importance of redefining masculinity beyond just being a provider
• Finding personal balance through giving to others and regular reflection
• Building stronger communities through vulnerability and shared experiences

Join the Better Dad community to connect with other fathers and men seeking growth through authentic relationships and mutual support.

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When was the last time you saw a man cry openly? The phrase "men don't cry" has been ingrained in our collective consciousness for generations, but at what cost? In this powerful Father's Day conversation, I sit down with Don Kester OSHIOREAME, a respected creative professional and relationship mentor, to unpack the devastating impact of this harmful stereotype.

"Crying is not a gender-assigned emotion," Don Kester states emphatically. "It's a human right." This simple yet profound declaration challenges centuries of conditioning that has taught men to suppress their tears and, by extension, their emotional lives. But as we discover throughout our discussion, these suppressed emotions don't simply vanish—they transform and resurface in destructive ways, from alcoholism and substance abuse to relationship problems and even violence.

We explore the painful reality of men's grief, particularly in situations like miscarriage where all attention focuses on the woman while men are expected to remain strong and supportive despite their own heartbreak. Don Kester shares practical strategies for dismantling this stigma, beginning with conscious parenting that models healthy emotional expression for boys. Through personal examples of how he teaches emotional intelligence to his teenage son, he demonstrates how we can raise a new generation of men who aren't afraid to acknowledge and express their feelings.

The conversation weaves through the spiritual dimension of men's lives, the challenge of forming meaningful adult friendships, and powerful advice for men currently struggling with their mental health. Don Kester's "LIP" framework—maintaining Life, Integrity, and Peace—offers a beacon of hope for men facing seemingly insurmountable challenges.

Whether you're a man struggling to express emotion, someone who loves a man who can't cry, or a parent raising boys, this conversation will transform how you think about masculinity and emotional expression. Share this episode with the men in your life—it might just be the permission they've been waiting for to acknowledge their full humanity, tears and all.

Don Kester Oshioreame books:
I am not disadvantaged

https://www.amazon.com/Am-Not-Disadvantaged-Don-Kester/dp/1514463555

No excuse

https://a.co/d/4Ey7TCy

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