In this episode of The Adoption Roadmap Podcast, Rebecca Gruenspan sits down with Jessie Mattos—a birth mother, passionate advocate, and director of birth mother programs at Abiding Love Charities. Known online as @ittakesatriad, Jessie brings raw honesty and powerful insight into what it truly means to support every member of the adoption triad.

Jessie bravely shares her own adoption journey, the complex emotions that followed placement, and how her healing truly began years later—after discovering the power of community and education. She dives into the realities of informed consent, post-adoption grief, and why love is not enough when it comes to ethical adoption.

Together, Rebecca and Jessie explore how hopeful adoptive parents can show up with intentionality, humility, and a willingness to listen—even when it’s uncomfortable. They also unpack red flags to look for when choosing an adoption agency, the do’s and don’ts of pre-placement communication, and how open adoption requires effort and honesty from both sides.

This episode is a must-listen for anyone hoping to adopt—and who wants to do it ethically, compassionately, and with long-term success in mind.

Important Links

• Abiding Love Charities

• BraveLove

• RG Adoption Consulting

• Follow Jessie on Instagram: @ittakesatriad

• • Take the “Are You Ready to Adopt?” Quiz

  
  

  ⏰ Chapters

  00:00 Intro – Why Every Side of the Triad Matters02:17 Who Is a Birth Mother, Really?05:11 Informed Consent & Risks Every Mom Deserves to Know07:26 Healing Through Education & Community11:20 Post-Placement Regret: What Causes It16:44 Understanding Birth Mom “Responsibilities”21:06 Red Flags in Adoption Agencies27:50 Toxic Positivity & Manipulative Language35:30 Grief After Placement: What Hopeful Parents Need to Expect40:11 Birth Fathers, Silence, and Support43:00 Language in Profile Books: What NOT to Say48:35 Communicating Directly with Expectant Moms55:44 How Adoptive Parents Can Truly Support a Birth Mom01:03:27 Double Standards in Adoption01:06:41 What Jessie’s Most Proud Of01:13:10 What Every Adoptive Parent Should Know

  
  

  Tune in to The Adoption Roadmap Podcast every Wednesday and Friday morning. If you like what you hear, I’d appreciate a follow and a 5-star rating & review! 💙 THANK YOU!

  For adoption questions, episode suggestions, or to appear as a guest, email support@rgadoptionconsulting.com