Have you ever felt that when your spouse is listening to you, it only LOOKS like they're listening? That as soon as you're done speaking, they will unleash their advice and their opinions on you?

On this Thursday Thoughts episode, we'll discover HOW we listen matters just as much (or more) than the fact that we are listening. We'll also learn:

• that "listening to understand" is more important than "listening to convince"
• how listening to understand can help us escape the drama triangle

Resources:

“In a study of two types of listening, clinical psychologist Faye Doell demonstrated how people who listen in order to understand versus listen in order to respond have higher across-the-board relationship satisfaction.”

from "Good Inside" by Dr. Becky Kennedy

https://www.goodinside.com/book/

An excellent article on the drama triangle:

https://www.idmin.org/_files/ugd/0d9c11_b989426836064bd3a9dfdfe15fe4e382.pdf

Want to get in touch with us? info@livingmarriages.com and check out our new website: www.livingmarriages.com

"Shame is the most powerful force on the planet, apart from grace."

Katie Skurja, founder of Imago Dei Ministries, is an internationally recognized inner healing practitioner, spiritual director and marriage counsellor. We were thrilled and honoured that she could join us in this conversation exploring the devastating power of shame in our marriages and the joy and freedom available in Christ's healing work.

Topics we explore include:

• What are "shadow vows" and why every couple should do them
• God's grace that is available for us to turn into and confront our shame rather than hide it
• How, as image bearers of God, we are like "Peanut M&Ms"
• When we understand the paradoxes of God, we understand ourselves and our spouses better
• What the drama triangle is and how it threatens our marriages

Resources:

For Katie's incredible conversation with children regarding the image of God and "Peanut M&M's", check out this video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVTBnl5iEEg&t=310s

An excellent article on the "Drama Triangle":

https://www.idmin.org/_files/ugd/0d9c11_b989426836064bd3a9dfdfe15fe4e382.pdf

Where to find Katie, her resources and courses:

Imago Dei Ministries - https://www.idmin.org

Companying Center - https://www.companioningcenter.org

Let us know what you think of this conversation! Contact April and Aaron at info@livingmarriages.org

When is the last time you thanked your spouse? For who they are or for something they did? Has it been awhile?

On this Thursday Thought, join Aaron as he explores another tip on creating a healthy marriage with God, this time by looking at the transformative power of gratitude in your marriage.

Topics we cover:

• Why gratitude matters
• How gratitude can transform your marriage along with some of the science that backs it up
• How keeping a gratitude journal transformed one man's view of his wife and his marriage

Resources

Gary Thomas: “Gratitude With Purpose In Marriage”

https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/gratitude-with-purpose-in-marriage/

Psychology Today

https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/imperfect-spirituality/202310/gratitude-could-help-your-marriage-last

Are you thankful for something in your marriage or your spouse? Please feel free to share! info@livingmarriages.com