Cocktail Therapy

By: Michael Ashenfelter LPC-S & Michael Leach PhD
  • Summary

  • Cocktail Therapy is a refreshing blend of humor, depth, and practical advice as two experienced therapists explore the intricacies of relationships, attachment theory, and pop culture over crafted cocktails.


    Each episode unpacks attachment theory in a fun, relatable way—mixing expert insights with pop culture references to make complex psychology accessible. Through lively conversations, real-life case studies, and actionable advice, Cocktail Therapy helps listeners deepen their understanding of relationships and personal growth.


    Whether you’re a therapist, a psychology enthusiast, or just curious about what makes relationships tick, grab a drink and join us as we shake up the worlds of mixology, attachment science, and pop culture. Cheers!

    © 2025 Cocktail Therapy
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Episodes
  • Earned Security & Self-Respect | The Bear S02E07 Forks
    Feb 10 2025

    In this episode, we explore Richie’s transformative journey as he experiences the five key conditions that foster security of attachment. Sent to a Michelin-starred restaurant, Richie initially perceives it as a punishment—another sign that he’s being cast aside. But as he immerses himself in this structured, respectful, and attuned environment, he begins to internalize something different: a sense of purpose, belonging, and pride.

    We discuss:

    • How secure attachment is nurtured in community
    • The power of feeling seen, supported, and delighted in
    • Why repetition and consistency are essential for healing attachment wounds
    • The pivotal moment of self-respect that shifts Richie's entire outlook
    • The unexpected joy of Taylor Swift and personal reinvention

    This episode of The Bear shows that healing isn’t linear—security is caught, not just taught. Join us as we break down how Richie’s earned security leads to self-respect, curiosity, and joy in a way we’ve never seen before.

    Grab a drink (maybe a maple old-fashioned) and let’s talk attachment! 🍹🎧

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    47 mins
  • Navigating Dinner Table Chaos | The Bear S02E06 Fishes
    Jan 6 2025

    Dinner can be a battlefield when disorganized attachment takes the lead. In this episode, the hosts explore The Bear, Season 2, Episode 6, "Fishes," breaking down the intense family dynamics and survival strategies at play. From Donna’s erratic cycles of connection and withdrawal to Carmi’s dismissive calm and Sugar’s anxious attempts to help, this episode is a masterclass in attachment theory. They also reflect on how the dinner table becomes a crucible for unresolved trauma and explore the broader implications of disorganized attachment for relationships and healing.

    Whether you’re drawn to the chaos or find it overwhelming, this conversation offers profound insights into the ways attachment affects us all.

    • 00:00 - Introduction
      Setting the stage for a deep dive into The Bear’s most intense episode.
    • 02:15 - What’s “Fishes” About?
      Recap of Episode 6 and why it stands out in the series.
    • 05:30 - Dinner Table Chaos and Binds
      The dynamics of disorganized attachment: Donna’s erratic behavior and its impact.
    • 12:48 - Sugar’s Anxious Coping
      Sugar’s attempts to control the situation and seek safety through connection.
    • 17:22 - Carmi’s Dismissive Strategies
      Carmi’s flat calm and avoidance as his way of managing family chaos.
    • 22:10 - Donna’s Cycles of Connection and Withdrawal
      Examining Donna’s unpredictable behavior and the fear it evokes.
    • 27:40 - Trauma Passed Down: Generational Attachment
      How attachment classifications are inherited and how families stay trapped in patterns.
    • 32:05 - The Dinner Table as a Symbol of Survival
      The painful interplay of fear, love, and unresolved trauma at the family gathering.
    • 38:18 - Healing is Possible
      Reflections on the hard but hopeful work of breaking generational cycles.
    • 42:00 - Wrapping Up and Looking Ahead
      Closing thoughts and a preview of the next episode.
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    1 hr and 12 mins
  • Growth Through Reflection and Play | The Bear S02E05 Pop!
    Dec 23 2024

    What does it look like when characters begin to grow into themselves and their relationships? In this podcast episode, the hosts unpack The Bear, Season 2, Episode 5, "Pop!", focusing on Tina’s newfound confidence and vulnerability alongside Carmi’s tentative steps toward emotional transparency. Tina shines in moments of connection with others, from her level-headed calm in chaos to her courage on the karaoke stage. Meanwhile, Carmi’s developing relationship with Claire showcases his attempts to navigate openness and intimacy while still struggling with unresolved dynamics in his partnership with Sidney. The conversation balances attachment theory insights with playful banter, all while teasing the emotional storm ahead in Episode 6.

    00:01 - Setting the Stage
    Introduction to the series themes, spoiler disclaimers, and excitement for Episode 6 on the horizon.

    03:20 - Why "Pop!"? Theories on the Episode Title
    Speculations on the meaning behind "Pop!"—from soda references to foreshadowing breakthroughs.

    07:45 - Tina’s Transformation in Chaos
    Tina’s emotional growth shines as she remains calm, direct, and collaborative in challenging situations.

    12:33 - Karaoke Night and Belonging
    Tina takes an emotional risk by singing at karaoke, symbolizing her courage to embrace community.

    18:10 - Carmi’s Steps Toward Vulnerability
    A look at Carmi’s playful connection with Claire and his monologue on risk-taking and reflection.

    23:50 - Reflective Dialogue: Carmi and Claire
    How Carmi and Claire’s conversations model secure attachment and mutual understanding.

    30:22 - The Tension with Sidney
    The repeated misattunements between Carmi and Sidney and the growing relational divide.

    37:05 - Anticipating "Fishes"
    Wrapping up with reflections on attachment in "Pop!" and gearing up for the intense, buzz-worthy Episode 6.

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    46 mins

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