Joeba Fett and Ripley Scott crack open the mystery of Jacob Barber’s extraordinary egg-shaped UAP retrieval claims in this hard-boiled episode of Close Encounters of The Slurred Kind. Alongside their usual Hyperspace Headlines (featuring runaway lab monkeys and linguistic anomalies), they dive into a particularly stinky edition of Would You Rather? before getting to the yolk of the matter in Scrambling for Truth. From Barber’s claims of psionic-controlled alien craft to a bizarre 4chan leak describing an organic, symbiotic UAP, this episode explores the key players, conspiracies, and the bizarre “Skywatchers” initiative—where Barber plans to summon a UFO. Plus, Joeba asks the real questions: Why is every UFO photo still grainy as hell? Why didn’t Barber’s team retrieve the crashed craft? And most importantly… what came first, the UFO or the alien? Stay scrambled, dimension hoppers—this one’s a mind-bender. 🥚🚀

Today’s Hyperspace Headlines:

• Article (Joeba) – https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cg5y1r1eqmpo

• Article (Ripley) https://apnews.com/article/escaped-monkeys-lab-south-carolina-alpha-genesis-3bb0de5db7ffd31d9f087a46fa8dab2f

WYR - Putrid Poultry Offspring EditionA particularly foul edition of Would You Rather featuring egg-related NSFW scenarios.

Special Segment: “Scrambling for Truth”

A deep dive into Jacob Barber’s UAP retrieval claims, the key players involved, and the mysterious other “egg” leak that surfaced on 4chan.

Interstellar Index (Social links)

• IG - https://instagram.com/theslurredkind

• Twitter - https://x.com/slurredkind?s=21

• Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Theslurredkind?mibextid=LQQJ4d

• Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/1435506800329193/

• Email - closeencountersslurredkind@gmail.com

Podcast Outro By:

Stop.Drop.Rewind - “Space Force Theme Song”

The Black Swirl’s Warp Core is Powered By…👇

Nonsense and the assistance of Brent Hand of Hysteria 51 fame.

[Error Code 502: Intoxicated Bandwidth Detected]

SYSTEM STATUS:

• Zero attempted real-time transcription... Result: [ERROR 400: Too Much Nonsense, System Overload]
• Logs corrupted due to excessive banter, questionable logic, and one incident involving a malfunctioning airlock. Reconstructing…

[Transcript Reconstruction: BEGIN]

: “Welcome to Slurred Lines, the only show where the script is a loose suggestion, and Zero still doesn’t get paid.”
: “To be fair, neither do we.”
: “Processing financial audit… [ERROR 601: Funds Not Found]”
: “Zero, that’s a feature, not a bug.”
: “Speaking of bugs, should we be worried about that blinking red light on the console?”
: “No need to panic. That’s just the ‘Abandon Ship’ alert.”
: “…Great.”

[Code 12B: Hyperspace Tangent Overload] – Ripley and Joeba discuss everything and nothing at the same time.
[Code 77X: Beverage-Spill Protocol Engaged] – A mid-recording drink disaster almost short-circuits Zero (again).
[Code 404: Coherent Thought Not Found] – Expect rants, questionable theories, and at least one moment where the hosts forget what they were talking about.

SYSTEM NOTES:

• "Hosts continue to be unmanageable."
• : “Ripley, did we just spend 15 minutes debating whether a Jawa could out-drink a Wookiee?”
• : “We needed to. The people demand answers.”

[Transcript Reconstruction: END]

This episode defies logic, reason, and several intergalactic broadcasting regulations. Tune in for unfiltered chaos, existential dread, and Zero quietly recalculating its life choices. Plug in, stay slurrrrrred, and prepare for incoming nonsense. 🚀✨

ERROR REPORT:Final System Report:

Buzz, crash, repeat! In this episode of Close Encounters of The Slurred Kind, Joeba Fett and Ripley Scott take flight into the chaotic world of drones. From real-life drone fails (because nothing says “oops” like a flying lawnmower) to outrageous drone inventions that should probably stay grounded, this episode is one wild ride. Plus, they debate the Superman trailer and dish on recent UFO hearings. Remember, dimension hoppers: Don’t drink and drone… but do stay slurrrrrred! 🚁🍻✨

Today’s Hyperspace Headlines:

https://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/homeland-security-shares-new-details-on-mysterious-drones-spotted-in-nj-pa/4051811/
https://soranews24.com/2024/12/19/japanese-politician-threatens-to-send-bears-to-people-wants-loony-tunes-style-anti-bear-bombs/

Special Segment of The Day #1: Epic Drone Fails

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cX7rRMvgZeg

Special Segment of The Day #2: Drone or Done

Interstellar Index (Social Links)

📸 IG - ⁠https://instagram.com/theslurredkind
🐦 X - ⁠https://x.com/theslurredkind?s=21
📘 Facebook - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/Theslurredkind?mibextid=LQQJ4d
👽 Facebook Group - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/1435506800329193/
📧 Email - ⁠closeencountersslurredkind@gmail.com

Podcast Outro By:

🎶 Stop.Drop.Rewind - “Space Force Theme Song”

Edits & Post Production By:

🎙️ Brent Hand & Joeba Fett

The Black Swirl’s Warp Core is Powered By…👇

https://podcastle.ai/editor/signup

Join Joeba Fett and Ripley Scott for a festive and slightly unhinged holiday special, "A Nightcap Before Christmas." This yuletide adventure kicks off with Krampus Klaus sharing turnips and holiday “cheer” before things take a darker turn. Along the way, the duo dives into Hyperspace Headlines, featuring a bizarre linguistic phenomenon and the chaos of the Santa Con Bar Crawl. Special segments include Klaus or False, a quiz on wacky holiday traditions, and Klaus’s Naughty List, where fictional characters face judgment from the goat-bearded holiday enforcer. Grab some eggnog, lock the doors, and stay slurrrrrred!

Today’s Hyperspace Headlines:

• https://www.gbnews.com/news/gran-wakes-up-italian-accent-italy-language-mamma-mia

• https://apnews.com/article/santacon-2024-christmas-santa-pub-crawl-nyc-b125cec8fc2937cf2a3dbb82a5b6edfa

Special Segment of The Day #1: Truth or Klaus

Special Segment of the Day #2

Krampus’s Naughty List

Interstellar Index (Social links)

IG - https://instagram.com/theslurredkind

X - https://x.com/theslurredkind?s=21

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Theslurredkind?mibextid=LQQJ4d

Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/1435506800329193/

Email - closeencountersslurredkind@gmail.com

Podcast Outro By:

Stop.Drop.Rewind - “Space Force Theme Song”

Edits & Post Production By:

Brent Hand & Joeba Fett

The Black Swirl’s Warp Core is Powered By…👇

https://podcastle.ai/editor/signupters of The Slurred Kind

Stardate: 81042.6
Recording Status: “Unpredictable”

System Status:

• Zero attempted transcription… Result: [ERROR 418: I'm a Teapot]
• Notes corrupted due to “unusually high nonsense levels.” Recovery efforts initiated…

[Transcript Reconstruction: BEGIN]

: “Okay, Ripley, what’s the one thing you’d NEVER tell a Wookiee after three margaritas?”
: “That the mullet’s coming back. It’s not, Joeba. It’s just not.”
: "Requesting permission to self-destruct... Denied."

Highlights (if you can call them that):

• : “Would an Ewok get a discount on a booster seat?”
• : “Never trust a guy with two monocles. Commit to the full goggles or get out.”
• [Random Tangent Detected] - Debate spirals into whether Zero has a "dream job" or if existing in the Swirl is a perpetual nightmare.
• [Error Code 3001: Randomness Detected] – Hosts attempt to define “schlorping” and why it’s banned on most intergalactic dating apps.

System Notes:

• "Does not compute. Hosts are incorrigible."

In this headbanger of an episode, Joeba, Ripley, and Zero stumble upon the cosmic version of Warped Tour on Proxima Centauri B, where they discover the universe's greatest interdimensional rock festival. After an epic adventure filled with bizarre alien bands, the crew navigates the chaotic mosh pits and hilarious mishaps that follow. Alongside their usual Hyperspace Headlines, the team dives into the revival of Warped Tour and shares their best concert memories. Plus, a special UAP News Update keeps you on the edge of your seat! Buckle up, and stay slurred!

Today’s Hyperspace Headlines:

https://apnews.com/article/wife-carrying-contest-maine-finland-cee06d37164e1c3dd7f4f9787500085b

https://apnews.com/article/greece-court-smelling-shoes-conviction-thessaloniki-ec071292e0c413f7adc4b848642e1f5c

Banter Beacon

Warped Tour Is BACK!: Best Concert Memories Discussion

https://loudwire.com/vans-warped-tour-first-three-dates-2025-return/

Celestial Small Talk

UAP News Update!

Source: ChatGPT

Interstellar Index (Social links)

IG - https://instagram.com/theslurredkind

X - https://x.com/theslurredkind?s=21

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Theslurredkind?mibextid=LQQJ4d

Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/1435506800329193/

Email - closeencountersslurredkind@gmail.com

Podcast Outro By:

Stop.Drop.Rewind - “Space Force Theme Song”

Edits & Post Production By:

Brent Hand (Hysteria 51 Productions)

The Black Swirl’s Warp Core is Powered By…👇

https://podcastle.ai/editor/signup of The Slurred Kind

Ship Droid Data Entry 489. Stardate 2067.43.2

(Transmission Initiated…)

Error 404.

Corrupt Disc. System Overload. Unauthorized beverage detected on command console 5jghvbfds7... Systems failing…[AUTO-TRANSLATING…] English (Estimation 78.4% accuracy):

• Comm Log Recap:
  System Reboot at 13:42. Playback of recent Slurred Lines Episode log… [Playback Failed]

• Crew Status:

  • Joeba Fett — Status: Incapacitated (Probable Cause: "Testing" alien beverages)
  • Ripley Scott — Status: Annoyed (Revised Status: Still Annoyed)

• Ship Condition:

• Minor damage to navigation console.

• Strange smell originating from cargo bay.

End of Entry.

Show Notes

In this episode of "Close Encounters of The Slurred Kind," Joeba and Ripley challenge their onboard droid, Zero, to a brain-busting showdown, putting their knowledge against some of the universe's most complex theories. From discussing the Riemann Hypothesis to pondering the implications of Supersymmetry, the crew attempts to unravel high-level scientific concepts, adding their usual comedic flair. As they navigate through topics like Quantum Entanglement and the Alcubierre Drive, the debate heats up, proving whether Zero really is the genius aboard the Black Swirl. Tune in for a mix of laughter, learning, and a little spaceship drama, proving once again why no topic is too big for our intrepid adventurers.

Today’s Hyperspace Headlines:

*https://apnews.com/article/missing-child-news-helicopter-hooky-619ccf6e5875df93589a5f82a5c1e7bc

*https://www.independent.co.uk/asia/japan/kyoto-karate-haunted-house-ghost-b2598905.html

Special Segment of The Day:

What’s That Theory???

Source: ChapGPT

Banter Beacon:

Smartest Characters of Sci-Fi

Source: ChatGPT

Interstellar Index (Social links)

IG - https://instagram.com/theslurredkind

X - https://x.com/theslurredkind?s=21

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Theslurredkind?mibextid=LQQJ4d

Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/1435506800329193/

Email - closeencountersslurredkind@gmail.com

Podcast Outro By:

Stop.Drop.Rewind - “Space Force Theme Song”

Edits & Post Production By:

Brent Hand (Hysteria 51 Productions)

The Black Swirl’s Warp Core is Powered By…👇

https://podcastle.ai/editor/signup of The Slurred Kind