When I Die I'm Going to Heaven 'Cause I've Spent My Time in Hell
A Memoir of My Year As an Army Nurse in Vietnam
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Narrated by:
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Janet Metzger
About this listen
When she was 18, she joined the army to finance her nursing education.
With less than six months of nursing experience, she was assigned to the 24th Evacuation Hospital in South Vietnam.
True tales of the war that are by turns horrifying and humorous, told with an eye for detail, by a woman who was in the thick of it.
©2013 Barbara Hesselman Kautz, MSN, RN (P)2019 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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In the late 1990s, a young physician in Albuquerque, New Mexico, published a stunning memoir of his experiences in the highly charged world of the ER. Presented in a series of powerful, poetic vignettes, The Blood of Strangers became an instant classic. Now, over two decades later, Dr. Frank Huyler delivers another dispatch from the trenches—this time from the perspective of middle age. In portraits visceral, haunting, sometimes surreal, Huyler reveals the gritty reality of medicine practiced on the razor’s edge between life and death.
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Even Better than The Blood of Strangers
- By Elizabeth Darcy on 10-14-20
By: Frank Huyler
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God's Hotel
- A Doctor, a Hospital, and a Pilgrimage to the Heart of Medicine
- By: Victoria Sweet
- Narrated by: Victoria Sweet
- Length: 13 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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San Francisco's Laguna Honda Hospital is the last almshouse in the country, a descendant of the Hôtel-Dieu (God's hotel) that cared for the sick in the Middle Ages. Ballet dancers and rock musicians, professors and thieves - "anyone who had fallen, or, often, leapt, onto hard times" and needed extended medical care - ended up here. So did Victoria Sweet, who came for two months and stayed for 20 years. Laguna Honda, lower-tech but human-paced, gave Sweet the opportunity to practice a kind of attentive medicine that has almost vanished.
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Great read
- By kayla solomon on 04-08-17
By: Victoria Sweet
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MASH: An Army Surgeon in Korea
- By: Otto F. Apel JR. M.D., Pat Apel
- Narrated by: Dr. Bill Brooks
- Length: 9 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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When North Korean forces invaded South Korea on June 25, 1950, Otto Apel was a surgical resident living in Cleveland, Ohio, with his wife and three young children. A year later he was chief surgeon of the 8076th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital, constantly near the front lines in Korea. Immediately upon arriving in camp, Apel performed 80 hours of surgery. His feet swelled so badly, he had to cut his boots off, and he saw more surgical cases in those three and a half days than he would have in a year back in Cleveland.
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MASH and the Korean War
- By Angie on 08-29-17
By: Otto F. Apel JR. M.D., and others
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Rebuilding Sergeant Peck
- How I Put Body and Soul Back Together After Afghanistan
- By: John Peck, Dava Guerin, Terry Bivens, and others
- Narrated by: John Peck, Peter Berkrot, Christina Traister
- Length: 8 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Marine Sgt. John Peck survived an IED during the War on Terror that left him with a traumatic brain injury, amnesia, and cost him his marriage. He survived another three years later, one that left him with three and a half limbs missing. He’s one of only two living people to survive the flesh-eating fungus he contracted in recovery at Walter Reed, one that left him as a quadruple amputee. And that’s only the beginning of his story. What followed was a recovery nothing short of miraculous.
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Story of one man's will to overcome
- By Amazon Customer on 02-12-21
By: John Peck, and others
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You Are Worth It
- Building a Life Worth Fighting For
- By: Kyle Carpenter, Don Yaeger
- Narrated by: Kyle Carpenter
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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You Are Worth It is a memoir about the War in Afghanistan and Kyle’s heroics, yes, but it also is a manual for living. Organized around the credos that have guided Kyle’s life (from “Don’t Hide Your Scars” to “Call Your Mom”), the book encourages us to become our best selves in the time we've been given on earth.
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Beautiful and emotionally draining
- By Shane on 10-25-19
By: Kyle Carpenter, and others
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Knocking on Heaven's Door
- The Path to a Better Way of Death
- By: Katy Butler
- Narrated by: Katy Butler
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Like so many of us, award-winning writer Katy Butler always assumed her aging parents would experience healthy, active retirements before dying peacefully at home. Then her father suffered a stroke that left him incapable of easily finishing a sentence or showering without assistance. Her mother was thrust into full-time caregiving, and Katy became one of the 24 million Americans who help care for aging parents. In an effort to correct a minor and non - life threatening heart arrhythmia, doctors outfitted her father with a pacemaker.
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A better way to narrate a book about death?
- By MAUREEN on 10-21-13
By: Katy Butler
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A Woman of Firsts
- The midwife who built a hospital and changed the world
- By: Edna Adan Ismail, Wendy Holden
- Narrated by: Edna Adan Ismail
- Length: 13 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Edna saw first-hand how poor healthcare, lack of education and ancient superstitions had devastating effects on Somaliland’s people, especially its women. When she suffered the trauma of FGM herself as a young girl at the bidding of her mother, Edna’s determination was set.
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Author Read and So Moving
- By Clementa Frederiksen on 03-04-24
By: Edna Adan Ismail, and others
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Undaunted
- The Real Story of America’s Servicewomen in Today’s Military
- By: Tanya Biank
- Narrated by: Pam Ward
- Length: 11 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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As she did so provocatively with military spouses in Army Wives, Tanya Biank gives us the inside story of women in today’s military - their professional and personal challenges from the combat zone to the home front. Since 9/11, more than 240,000 women have fought in Iraq and Afghanistan - more than 140 have died there, and they currently make up 14 percent of the total active-duty forces. Despite advances, today’s servicewomen are constantly pressed to prove themselves.
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Relevant for veterans/ PTSD
- By THE NOBLE MARRIAGE on 10-15-16
By: Tanya Biank
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Paradise General
- Riding the Surge at a Combat Hospital in Iraq
- By: David Hnida M.D.
- Narrated by: George K. Wilson
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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A family doctor with limited surgical experience, Dr. Dave Hnida volunteered for two tours of duty in Iraq - first as a battalion surgeon with a combat unit and then as trauma chief at the busiest Combat Support Hospital (CSH) during the Surge. Like a modern-day M*A*S*H, Dr. Hnida and his team conducted surgery under terrible conditions in a series of tents connected to the occasional run-down building.
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Fans of M*A*S*H will enjoy this book!
- By Elle Kay on 06-18-16
By: David Hnida M.D.
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Little Matches
- A Memoir of Finding Light in the Dark
- By: Maryanne O'Hara
- Narrated by: Maryanne O'Hara
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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When their only child was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis (CF) at the age of two, Maryanne O'Hara and her husband were told that Caitlin could live a long life or be dead in a matter of months. Thirty-one years later, Caitlin lost her battle with this devastating disease following an excruciating two-year wait on the transplant list and a last-minute race to locate a pair of healthy lungs. The sudden spiral of events left Maryanne in an existential crisis, searching to find an answer to the eternal question: Why we are here?
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I don't know who needs to read it...
- By H. Hill on 04-18-23
By: Maryanne O'Hara
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Your Heart, My Hands
- An Immigrant's Remarkable Journey to Become One of America's Preeminent Cardiac Surgeons
- By: Arun K. Singh MD, John Hanc - contributor, Delos Cosgrove MD - foreword
- Narrated by: Shridhar Solanki
- Length: 8 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Leaving a life marked by crippling setbacks and his father's doubt, in 1967 a 20-something doctor from India arrived in America with only five dollars and the desire to claim his American dream. Faced with an entirely new culture, racism, and the lasting effects of disabling childhood injuries, through hard work and perseverance he overcame all odds. Now having performed over 15,000 open-heart surgeries, more than nearly every surgeon in history, Dr. Singh reflects on his most memorable patients and his incredible personal life.
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Remarkable!
- By Stacey on 12-01-22
By: Arun K. Singh MD, and others
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no action, just talk
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Through the Valley
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In 1971 William Reeder was a senior captain on his second tour in Vietnam. He had flown armed, fixed-wing OV-1 Mohawks on secret missions deep into enemy territory in Laos, Cambodia, and North Vietnam, on his first tour. He returned as a helicopter pilot eager to experience a whole new perspective as a Cobra gunship pilot. Believing that Nixon's Vietnamization would soon end the war, Reeder was anxious to see combat action. To him, it appeared that the Americans had prevailed, beaten the Viet Cong, and were passing everything over to the South Vietnamese Army so Americans could leave.
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Vietnam - There & Back: A Combat Medic's Chronicle is a candid account of the time when Jim Purtell and several other combat vets found themselves conducting operations in the jungles of Vietnam during and after the Tet Offensive. Purtell describes in gritty detail what it was like to live and fight with an infantry company only to return to anti-Vietnam sentiment so strong that he and his fellow veterans felt nobody cared about them or the sacrifices they made.
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In the years since the Vietnam War, the elite unit known as SOG has spawned many myths, legends, and war stories. Special Forces medic Joe Parnar served with SOG during 1968 in FOB2/CCC near the tri-border area that gave them access to the forbidden areas of Laos and Cambodia. Parnar recounts his time with the recon men of this highly classified unit, as his job involved a unique combination of soldiering and lifesaving.
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Medics in Vietnam war
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Last Stand at Khe Sanh
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The vivid, fast-paced account of the siege of Khe Sanh told through the eyes of the men who lived it. For seventy-seven days in 1968, amid fears that America faced its own disastrous Dien Bien Phu, six thousand US Marines held off thirty thousand North Vietnamese Army regulars at the remote mountain stronghold called Khe Sanh. It was the biggest battle of the Vietnam War, with sharp ground engagements, devastating artillery duels, and massive US air strikes.
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The Great War and the Birth of Modern Medicine
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The Great War of 1914-1918 burst on the European scene with a brutality to mankind not yet witnessed by the civilized world. Modern warfare was no longer the stuff of chivalry and honor; it was a mutilative, deadly, and humbling exercise to wipe out the very presence of humanity. Suddenly, thousands upon thousands of maimed, beaten, and bleeding men surged into aid stations and hospitals with injuries unimaginable in their scope and destruction. Doctors scrambled to find some way to salvage not only life but limb.
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Interesting but weirdly sexist?
- By J-Murphy on 07-19-22
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Things I'll Never Forget
- Memories of a Marine in Viet Nam
- By: James M. Dixon
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Things I’ll Never Forget is the story of a young high school graduate in 1965 who faces being drafted into the Army or volunteering for the Marine Corps. These are his memories of funny times, disgusting times and deadly times. The author kept a journal for an entire year; therefore many of the dates, times and places are accurate. The rest is based on memories that are forever tattooed on his brain. This is not a pro-war book, nor is it anti-war. It is the true story of what the Marine Corps was like in the late 1960’s.
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Accurate Description
- By USMC VIETVET on 07-02-19
By: James M. Dixon
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We Were Soldiers Once... and Young
- Ia Drang - The Battle That Changed the War in Vietnam
- By: Harold G. Moore, Joseph L. Galloway
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis
- Length: 16 hrs
- Unabridged
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In November 1965, some 450 men of the First Battalion, Seventh Cavalry, under the command of Lt. Col. Hal Moore, were dropped by helicopter into a small clearing in the Ia Drang Valley. They were immediately surrounded by 2,000 North Vietnamese soldiers. Three days later, only two and a half miles away, a sister battalion was chopped to pieces. Together, these actions at the landing zones X-Ray and Albany constituted one of the most savage and significant battles of the Vietnam War. How these men persevered makes a vivid portrait of war at its most inspiring and devastating.
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The truth
- By Bobbyg on 10-08-19
By: Harold G. Moore, and others
What listeners say about When I Die I'm Going to Heaven 'Cause I've Spent My Time in Hell
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- marjorie
- 10-23-20
Engaging setting and story
I enjoyed Hesselman's story and life experience, and especially having insight into the Vietnam War era from one who was in country. I would have given it a higher rating if the narrator chosen had been younger, I felt like I was listening to my grandmother telling a story. It was distracting to have an older woman's voice, however capable, narrating a story about young adults. If the narrator had been livelier and youthful, I think it would have pulled the listener into the story's struggles, pain, parties and drama in a much more engaging manner.
Otherwise, it was a good 6 hours of listening.
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- Nancy J. Martin
- 07-03-23
Another Viet nam hero
Having a background in health care and having served, I appreciated the telling of her experience. I have respect for all who served in Vietnam and did what they could. Would recommend.
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- N. Thomas
- 02-13-20
Loved this
I am a little younger than Barbara and am also an RNMSN. I taught nursing and worked ER . I have a small idea of what she experienced. I had a close friend who was in ADAC. It was horrible too. She passed last year from a bad heart.
You are heroes for sure!
Nancy MSNRN
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4 people found this helpful
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- Patricia
- 03-19-24
Compelling narrative of life as a nurse in Viet Nam
This is a story that needs to be told, wars are still being fought and medical treatments necessary but effects on care givers is overlooked.
The narrative seemed bland when describing more intense situations but the anecdotes about life outside of the hospital are priceless.
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- Debra
- 03-18-23
Great book!
I really enjoyed this book. The author graduated from nursing school one year before me although I did not join the military. Many of the things she talked about are outdated and no longer done, however, I remember them well! The story bears some similarities to M*A*S*H but focuses more on the day-to-day experiences of the nurses. I highly recommend it even if you aren't in the medical field.
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- Anonymous User
- 12-14-23
A Nurses 1 yr tour in Vietnam
I ♥️♥️♥️ed this book. Although the closest I’ve come to being in the medical profession was a Dental Asst. Shows like Trauma in the ER & Dr. G Medical Examiner have always fascinated me. So did this audiobook. I found it very well written & narrated giving me a peek into the life of a nurse in the military practicing in Vietnam.
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- M. Jones
- 02-20-24
Intrigued by this chapter in our history!
This kept me engaged the whole time I listened. Was amazing to hear about the women who made a difference during the Vietnam war, and the way doctors & nurses had to persevere even through horrible times. They often treated more than just the soldiers fighting on our side. It’s a very good listen!
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- Deborah Peterson
- 03-28-24
What a great story
I loved this adventure- filled with equal measures of sadness and hope. What a wonderful story. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time.
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