
Toddlers Are A**holes
It's Not Your Fault
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Narrated by:
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Bahni Turpin
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By:
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Bunmi Laditan
About this listen
Toddler a**holery is a normal part of human development - not unlike puberty, except this stage involves throwing food on the floor and taking swings at people who pay your way in life. For parents of toddlers, it's a "you better laugh so you don't cry" period.
Bunmi Laditan's hilarious, satirical guide to toddlerhood offers parents instant (and very welcome) comic relief - along with the very good news that It's Not Your Fault. Chapters cover the cost of raising a toddler, feeding your toddler, potty training, tantrums, how to manage the holidays, and "how not to die inside". Parents will see themselves in the very funny sections on taking your toddler to restaurants ("One parent will spend their time walking your toddler around the restaurant and outside like a cocker spaniel, while the other, luckier parent will eat alone."), things you thought you'd never say that you now say as a parent of a toddler ("I can tell you're pooping because your eyes are watering."), and how to order pizza ("Spend $40 on pizza delivery. Listen to your toddler cry for 30 minutes about how the pizza is all wrong. Watch your toddler take a small bite of crust. Google 'can anger give you a heart attack?' Start the bedtime routine.").
Laditan's wildly funny voice has attracted hundreds of thousands of fans of Honest Toddler on social media; here she speaks parent to tired parent, easing the pains and challenges of raising toddlers with a hefty dose of adult humor and wit.
©2015 Bunmi Laditan (P)2015 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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horrible. boring. do not waste your time
- By Michelle on 01-23-21
By: Alicia Ybarbo, and others
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Oh Crap! I Have a Toddler
- Tackling These Crazy Awesome Years - No Time Outs Needed
- By: Jamie Glowacki
- Narrated by: Jamie Glowacki
- Length: 8 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Oh Crap! I Have a Toddler is about doing more with less - and bringing real childhood back from the brink of overscheduled, overstimulated helicopter parenting. With her signature down-and-dirty friend-to-friend advice, Jamie is here to help you experience the joy of parenting again and giving your child - and yourself - the freedom to let them grow at their own pace and become who they are.
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So good
- By AC555 on 07-19-19
By: Jamie Glowacki
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How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids
- A Practical Guide to Becoming a Calmer, Happier Parent
- By: Carla Naumburg PhD
- Narrated by: Patricia Rodriguez
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Stop the yelling, lose the guilt, and become a calmer, happier parent. Drawing on evidence-based practices, here is an insight-packed and tip-filled plan for how to stop the parental meltdowns. Its compassionate, pragmatic approach will help listeners feel less ashamed and more empowered to get their, ahem, act together instead of losing it.
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Good content written poorly
- By Red Beard on 09-01-20
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Stop Yelling and Love Me More, Please Mom.
- Positive Parenting Is Easier than You Think: Happy Mom, Book 1
- By: Jennifer N. Smith
- Narrated by: Meg Price
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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We can not raise a happy child if we are constantly screaming threats at them. No parent sets out to hurt their child, but this type of parenting does just that. To raise a happy child that wants to behave, you need to retrain yourself first. You need to change the way you think and react to their behavior. You need to understand your triggers and heal yourself. Only then you can begin to heal your relationship with your children.
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Nice information
- By Yesika on 09-27-19
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The Montessori Toddler
- By: Simone Davies
- Narrated by: Susie Berneis
- Length: 7 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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This guide offers a step-by-step plan that helps parents cultivate daily routines so that they can turn life with toddlers into a mutually rich time of curiosity and learning.
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A good book with a lot of ideas
- By Dewey on 07-23-21
By: Simone Davies
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The 7 Easy Steps to Anger Management for Parents with Toddlers
- How to Stop Stressing So Much and Start Enjoying Parenthood
- By: Raffael Lyon, S.K Braga
- Narrated by: Deb Thomas
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Has your home turned into a yelling hole with lots of “don’t do that", "stop", and "who did this?”—and you don’t know how to get past the frustration? Today is your lucky day—you are about to uncover some calm parenting hacks to help you get through. Written for the modern-day parent, this guide is tailored to your needs, providing practical advice and insights to change how you relate to your child today. You will learn how to calm yourself, get your child to listen to you, and start building the strong family relationships you desire.
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Not worth the money
- By Hector H. Matthies on 08-25-23
By: Raffael Lyon, and others
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Raising Good Humans
- A Mindful Guide to Breaking the Cycle of Reactive Parenting and Raising Kind, Confident Kids
- By: Hunter Clarke-Fields MSAE, Carla Naumburg PhD
- Narrated by: Jennifer Gilmour
- Length: 5 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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With this book, you’ll find powerful mindfulness skills for calming your own stress response when difficult emotions arise. You’ll also discover strategies for cultivating respectful communication, effective conflict resolution, and reflective listening. In the process, you’ll learn to examine your own unhelpful patterns and ingrained reactions that reflect the generational habits shaped by your parents, so you can break the cycle and respond to your children in more skillful ways.
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Great Book About Parenting and Teaching Kindness!
- By Ma P on 09-11-20
By: Hunter Clarke-Fields MSAE, and others
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The 5 Love Languages of Children
- The Secret to Loving Children Effectively
- By: Gary Chapman, Ross Campbell
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Every child has a unique way of feeling loved. When you discover your child's love language - and how to speak it - you can build a solid foundation for your child to trust you and flourish as he or she grows. In this audiobook for parents, teachers, single parents, and more, Drs. Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell offer practical advice for how to discover and speak your child's love language - in dozens of ways!
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"good content beware, heavy on religion "
- By Langenbergs on 02-15-20
By: Gary Chapman, and others
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Angry Parent Angry Child
- Anger Management Strategies to Stop Yelling, Keep Your Cool and Become a Peaceful Family
- By: Carrie Khang
- Narrated by: Ivory Tiffin
- Length: 3 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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As parents, you don’t have control over your kids; you can only control yourself! Therefore, you need to work on yourself and start having an enjoyable parenting experience. If your child constantly screams, throws tantrums, misbehaves, and engages in power struggles with you, you’re in the right spot. This book will teach you exactly how to work past your anger and resolve with your kids peacefully.
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Great advice
- By Kayla M. Rogers on 07-09-23
By: Carrie Khang
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No-Drama Discipline
- The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind
- By: Tina Payne Bryson PhD, Daniel j. Siegel MD
- Narrated by: Daniel J. Siegel MD, Tina Payne Bryson PhD
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Highlighting the fascinating link between a child’s neurological development and the way a parent reacts to misbehavior, No-Drama Discipline provides an effective, compassionate road map for dealing with tantrums, tensions, and tears - without causing a scene. Defining the true meaning of the “d” word (to instruct, not to shout or reprimand), the authors explain how to reach your child, redirect emotions, and turn a meltdown into an opportunity for growth.
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I Can See Light At The End Of My Tunnel
- By G Busi on 02-23-15
By: Tina Payne Bryson PhD, and others
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Summer Romance
- By: Annabel Monaghan
- Narrated by: Kristen DiMercurio
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Ali Morris is a professional organizer whose own life is a mess. Her mom died two years ago, then her husband left, and she hasn’t worn pants with a zipper in longer than she cares to remember. No one is more surprised than Ali when the first time she takes off her wedding ring and puts on pants with hardware—overalls count, right?—she meets someone. Or rather, her dog claims a man for her, in the same way he claimed his favorite of her three children: by peeing on him. Ethan smiles at Ali like her pants are just right—like he likes what he sees.
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Sweet ,clean romance that was sometimes a bit too slow
- By Well Read Nana 1/24 on 06-06-24
By: Annabel Monaghan
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1-2-3 Magic
- Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 (6th edition)
- By: Thomas W. Phelan PhD
- Narrated by: Paul Costanzo
- Length: 7 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Being a parent is one of the most rewarding experiences in life, but every family faces challenges that can be frustrating and overwhelming. For more than 25 years, internationally renowned clinical psychologist Thomas W. Phelan's 1-2-3 Magic has helped millions of parents, teachers, and caregivers raise independent, emotionally intelligent children and build happier, healthier families - all through an easy to understand program that you'll swear "works like magic".
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Not for kids with Trauma
- By Amy K. on 12-17-19
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Tiny Humans, Big Emotions
- How to Navigate Tantrums, Meltdowns, and Defiance to Raise Emotionally Intelligent Children
- By: Alyssa Blask Campbell, Lauren Elizabeth Stauble
- Narrated by: Alyssa Blask Campbell
- Length: 10 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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We’re in the midst of a parenting revolution that is radically changing the way we raise our kids. Gone are the days of minimizing emotions: Don’t Cry. You’re Fine. Don’t Make a Scene. As our understanding of developing brains has increased, today’s parents are looking for a new way to help their children understand their feelings and learn to process them.
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Good pointers for preschool parents and teachers
- By Chelsea on 06-17-24
By: Alyssa Blask Campbell, and others
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How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk
- By: Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish
- Narrated by: Susan Bennett
- Length: 8 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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This best-selling classic by internationally acclaimed experts on communication between parents and children includes fresh insights and suggestions, as well as the author’s time-tested methods to solve common problems and build foundations for lasting relationships.
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Best. Parenting. Book. Ever.
- By John on 01-02-13
By: Adele Faber, and others
What listeners say about Toddlers Are A**holes
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- D Whervs
- 07-10-16
laugh out loud
This book gave a funny realistic interpretation of raising a toddler and whereas not everything applied to me I appreciate that I'm not the only mommy who feels overwhelmed at times.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Emily
- 07-25-19
if you need a good laugh
Lots of relatable hilarious moments! however the satire got a little much by the end, as there was no break.
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- Sheila Daniels
- 04-30-21
Loved This Audio
This audio was funny and true. Experiences were very true to life daily events. As a grand parent i can relate.
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- Perfect for rentals
- 10-11-22
F…..ing hilarious
So I rarely give reviews, I just don’t have the time, but this book is hilarious!! I have a four year old bonus child and my husband and I are trying for our own together. That being said, I am a toddler parent and a working women. ANYONE should read this book; to lighten up, have a laugh, or get prospective. Slowish start…but HELL OF A BOOK with a fabulous commentator. I just laughed SUPER out loud in the gym while on the elliptical! READ IT!
Ps-even my man’s man sexy husband is reading it!
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- Danielle Lopez
- 10-16-23
Laughed so hard I cried
Thank you felt a huge weight lifting off my shoulders when listening to this book. My kid entered the terrible two phase around 18mths. Still have a ways to go with her in this phase so it’s been rough. Good to have a laugh it’s been awhile now….much needed!!!
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-24-19
Loved it
I really enjoyed this audio book! OMG! I could relate to almost everything. My daughters are grown up now, but this book took me way back. Thank you for the laughs. Hilarious material. Great performance!
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- Jessica Newman
- 09-18-19
This book is HYSTERICAL!!!!!
This book is so funny! If you have a toddler you have to read it!
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- FrozenYak
- 08-03-18
Hilariously Accurate...
If you don’t have a sense of humor this isn’t for you. If you feed your kid chia seeds and organic goat cheese instead of Cheetos and string cheese, this isn’t for you. It flows more like a comedy set and isn’t a self help book, it’s more validation that you are human and reinforces that you’re not sh*tty parent because you at times give up and give in to your little a-hole. I enjoyed it best at 1.25x speed.
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- Laura G
- 09-14-18
Extreme, but funny at times
Struggled to finish this one. The overarching premises are true, but the toddler in the story seems to be the worst possible depiction of every toddler struggle, with lots of swearing and alcohol included by the writer as a solution and way of life to cope.
The narrator is tough- its better sped up; I used 1.3x. Her voice comes across condescending and slow initially. So much attitude, I have a hard time relating throughout.
That said, several parts made me chuckle, and take my toddler's fits and struggles with a little better perspective.
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- Stevie
- 09-01-22
Loved it.
Loved it. Let's a real toddler mom know she's not alone, that there is more of us then the fake moms out there. lol
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