Preview
  • This Quest Is Broken!

  • This Trilogy Is Broken, Book 1
  • By: J. P. Valentine
  • Narrated by: Andrew Tell
  • Length: 12 hrs and 2 mins
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars (976 ratings)

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This Quest Is Broken!

By: J. P. Valentine
Narrated by: Andrew Tell
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Publisher's summary

The Questing Stones have come to Nowherested, and Evelia Greene is finally ready to receive her life's quest. Perhaps she'll be a great warrior, or a wealthy merchant, or a brilliant mage. Perhaps her quest is simply to live a quiet life, constantly honing a craft to the heights of perfection.

Or perhaps the Questing Stones will grant her the legendary mission of popping over to the next village to pick up a loaf of bread.

Wouldn’t that be ridiculous?

Eve can’t even begin to guess how or why she’s come by such an absurd life goal, nor how a level-one messenger girl is supposed to complete anything labeled as legendary, but at least she can be sure of one thing. No matter how many wolves or goblins attack, no matter how many speeding tickets she racks up, no matter how many bakeries spontaneously combust as she steps into town, one way or another, Eve is going to get that goddamned bread.

There just might be a few side quests along the way.

This book contains game elements, good jokes, bad jokes, worse jokes, and language strong enough to lift weights. Please enjoy.

©2021 Nixia Publishing LLC (P)2021 Nixia Publishing LLC
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What listeners say about This Quest Is Broken!

Average customer ratings
Overall
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    644
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Story
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
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  • 3 Stars
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  • 2 Stars
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  • 1 Stars
    21

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  • Overall
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    5 out of 5 stars

Hilarious adventure with a great story

This book was hilarious, fun, and awesome! It was a great adventure with lots of jokes and puns, and I loved the characters. Going right now to get the second book.

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1 person found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Really good!

Thought I’d take a chance on a new author and a new narrator in the recent sale. Premise sounded fun.

It was most excellent fun. Charming and enough innovation to keep you hooked. I’ll be finishing this series. Has stats but isn’t heavy-handed about it.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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Good audiobook

I loved it! Thought it was a little weird a man was narrating when the main character is female but I really enjoyed his preform.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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Thoroughly Enjoyed

I like this type of world where there’s a game system in place already. So you don’t have people coming in from another world, trying to figure out the system. Instead you’re learning about characters who’ve grown up with the system and are trying to work it to their advantage

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

never knew a fetch quest to be so hard.

loved it, eve is the punky little sister we want to root for, and cant tell you how i enjoy being continuously surprised by this book.

voice acting was strong and they did a very good job humanizing the characters.

good plot and great jokes.

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7 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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good book

its a good book and good start to a series but people are right like why is everything in the book super gay lol like everything

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Fun and Moves Along Nicely

A quest for a loaf of bread. A legendary quest for a loaf of bread. What's so difficult about buying a loaf of bread? Everything, when everywhere you go, something conspires against you!

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

story mechanics, character, all pluses

I didn't even know this genre existed! Love the level up system. Found myself waiting on edge for the event that would result in some type of upgrade. Love all the characters and the character development. as the stars suggest, just love it.

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

great story overall. real funny.

I'll start by saying, overall, this is an excellent story. I hadn't been quite sure when I first bought it. The sample didn't really do much more than show me that the narrator was good at his job. The brief description sounded like it might be fun, and so I took a shot in the dark.

Overall, I'm glad I did. The story does a great job at keeping you on the edge of your seat, It's at moments blindingly funny, while still having lots of action. The 12 hours seemed to fly by.

I will say this, there is a moment perhaps 8 - 9 hours into the story, where the story gets a little odd. I'm not even really sure if I can point out what the problem is. i just know that for nearly 90 minutes perhaps 3 hours before the story ends, I went from not being able to put the book down, to having to force myself to continue, only for the story to pick up again.

It ended strong, and I'm looking forward to the second book, but there was an issue there near the end.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

If you like another stupid trilogy then you'll

Yet in the vein of another stupid trilogy this story turns the genre on its side and shakes it for everything it's worth it's a good rump that respects The genre Is Give a twist of a sense of humor and pokes fun hide everything Just the right way

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