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Stories I Tell on Dates
- Narrated by: Paul Shirley, Punch Audio
- Length: 7 hrs and 21 mins
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Publisher's summary
Everyone tells stories on dates. Sometimes we tell these stories to make people laugh. Sometimes we tell them to make people think. Sometimes we tell them so we can increase the chances we'll see the other person naked.
Paul Shirley's stories are about an adulthood spent all over the world: living in Spain, playing in the NBA, and having his heart (and spleen) broken. But they're also stories about growing up in small-town Kansas: triumphant spelling bees, catastrophic middle school dances, and a Sex Ed. class taught by his mother.
They're funny stories. They're vulnerable stories. Most of all, they're universal stories, just as the stories we tell on dates should be.
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When Lily and Alex entered a packed gymnasium in Queens, New York, in 1972, they barely recognized their son. The boy who escaped to America with them, who was bullied as he struggled to learn English and cope with family tragedy, was now a young man who had discovered and secretly honed his basketball talent on the outdoor courts of New York City. That young man was Ernie Grunfeld, who would go on to win an Olympic gold medal and reach previously unimaginable heights as an NBA player and executive.
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Exceptional
- By Patrick Messing on 04-07-22
By: Dan Grunfeld
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Shattered
- Struck Down, But Not Destroyed
- By: Frank Pastore, Ellen Vaughn
- Narrated by: Frank Pastore
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Shattered is part sports audio book, because you’ll go on road trips, enter clubhouses, and walk on the fields of professional baseball. It’s part romantic novel, because you’ll journey with two young kids who fall in love and eventually elope, evading not only her family, but the law as well - for she was only 16. It’s also a story of brokenness, betrayal, and burn-out. If you were raised in a dysfunctional family, if you’ve ever had your dreams fall apart, been betrayed by close friends, or hit the psychological “wall” in your professional career, this is your audio book too.
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Loved it
- By Jim Battle on 01-29-23
By: Frank Pastore, and others
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The Keeper - Young Readers' Edition
- The Unguarded Story of Tim Howard
- By: Tim Howard
- Narrated by: William Harper
- Length: 5 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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In this heartwarming and candid memoir, Tim Howard does something he would never do on a soccer field: he drops his guard. As fiercely protective about his privacy as he is guarding the goal for the US national team and for Everton in the English Premier League, Howard opens up for the first time about how a hyperactive kid from New Jersey with Tourette's syndrome defied the odds to become one of the world’s premier goalkeepers.
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Don't judge a book by it's cover.
- By Anonymous User on 08-17-17
By: Tim Howard
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Solo
- A Memoir of Hope
- By: Hope Solo
- Narrated by: Christina Delaine
- Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Hope Solo is the face of the modern female athlete. She is fearless, outspoken, and the best in the world at what she does: protecting the goal of the U.S. women's soccer team. Her outsized talent has led her to the pinnacle of her sport - the Olympics and the World Cup - and made her into an international celebrity who is just as likely to appear on ABC's Dancing with the Stars as she is on the covers of Sports Illustrated, ESPN The Magazine, and Vogue.
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Not your normal memoir
- By Rory on 02-14-15
By: Hope Solo
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The Silver Linings Playbook
- A Novel
- By: Matthew Quick
- Narrated by: Ray Porter
- Length: 7 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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During his years in a neural-health facility, Pat Peoples has formulated a theory about silver linings. He believes that his life is a movie produced by God, that his mission is to become physically fit and emotionally supportive, and that if he succeeds, his happy ending will be the return of his estranged wife, Nikki. When Pat goes to live with his parents, everything seems changed: no one will talk to him about Nikki, and his new therapist seems to be recommending adultery as a form of therapy.
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WARNING: FOOTBALL FOOTBALL FOOTBALL!
- By Jennifer on 03-06-15
By: Matthew Quick
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Life Is Not an Accident
- A Memoir of Reinvention
- By: Jay Williams
- Narrated by: Jay Williams
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Like millions of kids before him, Jay Williams used to pretend he was making the game-winning shot while playing basketball in his Plainfield, New Jersey, backyard. Unlike almost all of those other kids, he kept right on making shots until he became an NCAA champion and two-time national player of the year at Duke and the number-two overall NBA draft pick in 2002.
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Taking ownership of mistakes
- By ladybug on 07-20-16
By: Jay Williams
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Courage to Soar
- A Body in Motion, a Life in Balance
- By: Simone Biles
- Narrated by: Imani Parks
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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In Courage to Soar, the official autobiography from four-time Olympic gold-winning and record-setting American gymnast Simone Biles, Simone shares how her faith, family, passion, and perseverance against tremendous odds made her one of the top athletes and record-breaking gymnasts in the world - and how you too can overcome challenges in your life. In this audiobook, Simone shares the details of her inspiring personal story - one filled with the kinds of daily acts of courage that led her, and can lead you, to even the most unlikely of dreams.
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A little thin
- By Rachel2450 on 11-24-16
By: Simone Biles
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Play Their Hearts Out
- A Coach, His Star Recruit, and the Youth Basketball Machine
- By: George Dohrmann
- Narrated by: Emily Rose Speer
- Length: 15 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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The NBA has returned to prominence on the backs of phenoms like LeBron James, Kobe Bryant, and Kevin Garnett. The media promotes them, the shoe companies pay them, and America applauds. But how exactly do such players reach the pros? What do they give up to get there? And what happens to those who fall short?
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Amazing book, fantastic narration.
- By Randy on 11-03-10
By: George Dohrmann
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Between Sundays
- By: Karen Kingsbury
- Narrated by: Kathy Garver
- Length: 10 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Football season becomes a time of realization that life's most important victories are won off the field. A star running back with much to learn, a younger player with much to give, and a woman with a heart for underprivileged kids - all three are thrown together into a time of self-discovery and a new awareness of the things that matter most.
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Great Narration
- By Jennifer on 12-30-12
By: Karen Kingsbury
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Slow Getting Up
- A Story of NFL Survival from the Bottom of the Pile
- By: Nate Jackson
- Narrated by: Nate Jackson
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Nate Jackson’s Slow Getting Up is an unvarnished and uncensored memoir of everyday life in the most popular sports league in America - and the most damaging to its players - the National Football League. After playing college ball at a tiny Division III school, Jackson, a receiver, signed as a free agent with the San Francisco 49ers, before moving to the Denver Broncos. For six seasons in the NFL as a Bronco, he alternated between the practice squad and the active roster, eventually winning a starting spot - a short, tenuous career emblematic of the average pro player.
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Almost unlistenable...AND I'M A DENVER DIEHARD!
- By JROD2133 on 07-02-14
By: Nate Jackson
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No Excuses
- Growing Up Deaf and Achieving My Super Bowl Dreams
- By: Marcus Brotherton, Derrick Coleman Jr.
- Narrated by: Sean Crisden
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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In this inspirational memoir, Derrick Coleman, Jr., the Seattle Seahawks fullback who won the 2014 Super Bowl with the Seahawks in his second year in the NFL, relates his inspirational story of hard work and determination in his own words. Showcasing his unlikely and challenging journey to become the first deaf athlete to play offense in the NFL, he talks about overcoming internal and external obstacles in the course of reaching your true potential.
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Inspirational & honest!
- By Kari Piazza on 04-24-17
By: Marcus Brotherton, and others
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The Chicken Runs at Midnight
- A Daughter’s Message from Heaven That Changed a Father’s Heart and Won a World Series
- By: Tom Friend, Tim Kurkjian - foreword
- Narrated by: Ben Holland - foreword, Mark Schlicher
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Weaving baseball history with personal memoir, this book is one that will make you thrill to victory, believe in hope, stand up to cheer for what is good in peoples' lives. It's a powerful story of redemption and faith that reminds us that God can work in our lives even when we think it's too late to change - and sometimes he sends us signs from heaven if we only have eyes to see.
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not really a sport's fan
- By virginia loranger on 09-24-20
By: Tom Friend, and others
What listeners say about Stories I Tell on Dates
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Bang Potential
- 10-28-17
Paul Shirley reads the audiobook and it really flies by.
It has clever insights from an "innocent(s) abroad", and recalls youth in a way that's uniquely enriching as opposed to the empty-to-all-but-the-author mode I normally find done elsewhere.
You'll laugh on the street, your commute, while you assemble a fake Eames rocker, however it won't be from setup, tick, tick, punchline but something much more refreshing. Every chapter is better than the one before and when people ask what you are laughing about you'll be keen to do a retelling but vexed about where to start.
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- TheKYDude
- 02-27-18
Great story that guys can relate to
If you could sum up Stories I Tell on Dates in three words, what would they be?
Interesting life stories
What was one of the most memorable moments of Stories I Tell on Dates?
Humor mixed with emotions of a guy whose struggle through professional sports and life yielded a great series of stories.
What about Paul Shirley and Punch Audio ’s performance did you like?
Paul's audio made the story's humor come to life as he reads it like he meant it to be read.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
The story makes each of us reflect on some of the silly and emotional things that happened in our lives and have been part of forming who we are.
Any additional comments?
A great read in chapters-if you are looking for something to listen to in chunks-a little bit each day-and want to laugh and ponder life a bit-this book is for you.
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- HollyHobby
- 03-16-18
Stories I Tell on Dates on Audible
Loved it! The book's inter-twined, candid stories were delightfully entertaining! Especially for this fellow Iowa Stater.
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- David A. Gardner
- 05-03-18
Fascinating and heartwarming
Paul's vulnerability and unique path in life as a pro athlete relating to women was told with refreshing honesty and held an enjoyable line between lighthearted and deep. The end result is a charming, well written memoir.
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- Tom Craven
- 11-10-17
Thoroughly enjoyable and unexpectedly thoughtful memoir
I was pleasantly surprised in just about every way by this book. It’s a collection of good stories, well told. Shirley has a sense of humor, which I expected, but also a literary style, which I did not.
I would recommend it to basketball fans of Paul’s era, but also to anyone who grew up in the 80s, has dealt with anxiety in a high performing way, or just enjoys quality memoir writing.
Someday I would love to listen to his reflections on fatherhood.
The narration was by the deep-voiced author, and it was excellent.
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- Randy Brown
- 01-06-18
The Audio allowed me to laugh at the guy I know!
Where does Stories I Tell on Dates rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
It ranks up there on the top of the heap for me along with The Herion Diaries by Nikki Sixx. Both presented a raw, honest, and unashamed look at their past, making for a powerful book.
Who was your favorite character and why?
My favorite character was the one and only, Paul Shirley, himself!
Have you listened to any of Punch Audio and Paul Shirley ’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
I've listened to him more than most, yes. I was his coach at Iowa State and saw about every side of the guy possible.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
When the girl asked for his autograph in the library-----it moved me because I was with him and shared tears with him after out loss to Michigan State. That story will stick to me forever.
Any additional comments?
He not only is an excellent writer, he teaches writing to those moved to do so. I like that!
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- Julie Richer
- 07-03-19
At times funny, at times suspenseful, great fun
I found this in my 29-year-old daughter's library when she set up sharing in Audible. So glad I did. Paul Shirley's account of growing up in a small Kansas town with dreams of playing in the NBA and achieving that goal is an entertaining memoir regardless of whether you like basketball. I like that it's told by the author. He makes the suspenseful moments come alive, whether it's at a spelling bee or a game where the team's future is on the line. There were times I laughed out loud. Other parts I found quite touching. He is insightful and, I think, has a wonderful future as an author. I look forward to hearing more from him.
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- Nat
- 01-19-18
I never wanted these "Dates" to end
If you're preparing yourself for a first date with Paul Shirley, his books make for interesting crib notes. They also prove why he's so well-qualified to write a tell-all: Shirley fields a lot of questions (certain ones, on repeat), and he's awfully good at answering them.
In his latest volume, "Stories I Tell on Dates," the former collegiate and professional basketball player (NBA via Iowa State University) exposes even more of the sizable brains and guts that brought us "Can I Keep My Jersey? 11 Teams, 5 Countries, and 4 Years in My Life as a Basketball Vagabond" in 2007, drawing the reader into his emotional anguish while allowing us to laugh with him when crying has already been exercised as an option.
"I've thrown up in more countries ... than most people from my hometown will ever visit," Shirley cautions in "Stories I Tell on Dates" as he takes the reader (or audiobook listener; this author narrates his own tales) around the world with anecdotes of the life experiences to bring upon him the furrowing of some apparently very overworked brows. Like his description of hometown life on the Kansas plains, time spent reading or hearing Shirley's stories will slip by "like a buckskin canoe in a gurgling creek."
The self-described "scissors in a junk drawer" opines on a range of emotions, from disappointment in the realization he would never attain a childhood goal of becoming an astronaut due to his "arrival at a height far too great for any spacesuit NASA has ever made," to sad reverie following basketball defeat through physical pain and painkillers alike: "Emotional deflation has a weird way of rendering useless most opiates." As he leads us through blush-inducing scenarios familiar to all who've navigated the toils and snares of growing up, Shirley spills every detail with poignant aplomb: "I want (someone to) ... get under some blankets with me, and tell me everything will be OK. This is my secret: I just want someone to tell me it will be OK."
I find this to be the perfect time to also recommend Shirley's first tome, for reasons beyond the clichéd "I laughed, I cried" (though I did truly, honestly chuckle to myself on multiple occasions and douse tears welling up at others). Today's drastically lighter-hearted (though still bass-deep) voice is a welcome contrast from that of his days of, shall we say, globe-trotting: A decade ago, Shirley claimed to be able to "out-sullen nearly anyone;" now he boasts a social media feed colorfully featuring book signings, cartwheels, California smiles and beach-body abs (worth the price of admission, ladies. Just follow paulthenshirtley on Insta and thank me later). This reader finds relief in the happy-sunset denouement of a nice Kansas farm (well, country) boy basking in adulthood rather than being subjected to it. I never wanted these "Dates" to end.
If you're curious about a real-life date with the author, you can both stand in line (his list of romantic interests include Division I basketball and volleyball players, a professional gymnast, at least one Playmate bunny, and the best-looking women in the arenas, restaurants, airports and other stops along his way) as well as take a peek into his writing to help put together that crib sheet: A devourer of novels himself (such as Tolstoy's "War and Peace" over the course of a recent seven months), Shirley is working on drafts of several more books, including one aimed at young adults. I predict readers will be, to borrow a Shirley phrase, "cheering with the sort of fervor usually reserved for 21st century soccer matches and 17th century beheadings." In other words, everything will be more than OK for the Cyclones alum (especially those abs).
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- warwick jackson
- 01-12-18
Uncomfortably close to the truth
Paul Murphy Shirley (PMS ) , is just talented! Real stories we can all relate to that make you laugh out loud. Even NBA and college basketball players had the same feelings and insecurities as mere mortals growing up. .......and he used to watch Doogie Howser MD, so he clearly good judgement. Love your work Paul five stars
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- Boris Baeta
- 12-21-17
Paul is a fantastic storyteller.
By the end of this book you learn a little about Paul but I think you will find that you will have learned a little about yourself as well. A very entertaining book.
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