Someone Could Get Hurt
A Memoir of 21st-Century Parenthood
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Narrated by:
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Drew Magary
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By:
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Drew Magary
About this listen
Audie Award Finalist, Humor, 2014
A sharp, funny, and heartfelt memoir about fatherhood and the ups and downs of raising a family in modern America.
No one writes about family quite like Drew Magary. The GQ correspondent and Deadspin columnist's stories about trying to raise a family have attracted millions of readers online. And now he's finally bringing that unique voice to a memoir. In Someone Could Get Hurt, he reflects on his own parenting experiences to explore the anxiety, rationalizations, compromises, and overpowering love that come with raising children in contemporary America.
In brutally honest and funny stories, Magary reveals how American mothers and fathers cope with being in over their heads (getting drunk while trick-or-treating, watching helplessly as a child defiantly pees in a hotel pool, engaging in role-play with a princess-crazed daughter), and how stepping back can sometimes make all the difference (talking a toddler down from the third story of a netted-in playhouse, allowing children to make little mistakes in the kitchen to keep them from making the bigger ones in life). It's a celebration of all the surprises - joyful and otherwise - that come with being part of a real family.
In the wake of recent best sellers that expose how every other culture raises their children better, Someone Could Get Hurt offers a hilarious and heartfelt defense of American child rearing with a glimpse into the genuine love and compassion that accompany the missteps and flawed logic. It's the story of head lice, almost-dirty words, flat-head syndrome, and a man trying to commit the ultimate act of selflessness is a selfish world.
©2013 Drew Magary (P)2013 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"It’s an honest and hilarious portrayal of how aggravating it can be to raise a family." (Justin Halpern, author of the New York Times best seller Sh*t My Dad Says)
"The world needs Drew Magary’s wonderfully funny, breathtakingly honest book about parenting." (Jen Doll, memoirist and senior writer at The Atlantic Wire)
"The Father's Day book for dads who hate getting books for Father’s Day." (Will Leitch, author of Are We Winning? and God Save the Fan)
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Lauren Weedman is not okay. She's living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a gig as a correspondent with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO's Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In these comedic essays, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually not okay.
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Good
- By Ajules29 on 04-02-16
By: Lauren Weedman
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The Postmortal
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- By: Drew Magary
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 10 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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In a world where an anti-aging cure is available worldwide, immortality comes with its own unique problems. John Farrell is about to get "The Cure". Old age can never kill him now. The only problem is, everything else still can.
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Interesting concept but bleak and wearing
- By Amazon Customer on 05-15-12
By: Drew Magary
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Everything You Ever Wanted
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- By: Jillian Lauren
- Narrated by: Jillian Lauren
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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In her younger years, Jillian Lauren was a college dropout, a drug addict, and an international concubine in the Prince of Brunei's harem, an experience she immortalized in her best-selling memoir, Some Girls. In her 30s, Jillian's most radical act is learning the steadying power of love when she and her rock star husband adopt an Ethiopian child with special needs.
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Great for adoptive families
- By berry bomb on 07-06-22
By: Jillian Lauren
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If I am Missing or Dead
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- By: Janine Latus
- Narrated by: Shelly Frasier
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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In April 2002, Janine Latus' youngest sister, Amy, wrote a note and taped it to the inside of her desk drawer. "Today Ron Ball and I are romantically involved", it read, "but I fear I have placed myself at risk in a variety of ways. Based on his criminal past, writing this out just seems like the smart thing to do. If I am missing or dead this obviously has not protected me...."
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All About Janine
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By: Janine Latus
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I'm Down
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- Narrated by: Mishna Wolff
- Length: 8 hrs and 6 mins
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Mishna Wolff grew up in a poor black neighborhood with her single father, a white man who truly believed he was black. "He strutted around with a short perm, a Cosby-esque sweater, gold chains and a Kangol---telling jokes like Redd Fox, and giving advice like Jesse Jackson. You couldn't tell my father he was white. Believe me, I tried," writes Wolff. And so from early childhood on, her father began his crusade to make his white daughter down.
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I stopped listening an hour in....
- By Casey on 11-07-09
By: Mishna Wolff
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I Can Barely Take Care of Myself
- Tales from a Happy Life Without Kids
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- Narrated by: Jen Kirkman
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"You'll change your mind." That's what everyone says to Jen Kirkman - and countless women like her - when she confesses she doesn't plan to have children. But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control.
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Funny. Not fall down laughing funny, but funny
- By david on 05-22-13
By: Jen Kirkman
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#IMomSoHard
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- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
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In their highly anticipated first audiobook, the hilarious mom duo with millions of followers explores all the ridiculous shit you’re expected to do to keep multiple humans alive and happy-ish and celebrates the love for the friends who get you through it.
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IRelateSoHard
- By Peekablue on 04-20-19
By: Kristin Hensley, and others
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May We Be Forgiven
- By: A. M. Homes
- Narrated by: Andy Paris
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- Unabridged
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May We Be Forgiven, a darkly comic novel of 21st-century domestic life, stars Harold Silver, a historian who's always been jealous of his successful brother, George. But when the hot-tempered George is institutionalized for committing a violent act, Harold finds himself comforting his brother's wife and children. What follows is a scathing examination of a family so fractured it may never be whole again.
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Give this one a try!
- By JWB on 02-13-13
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Darling Days
- A Memoir
- By: iO Tillett Wright
- Narrated by: iO Tillett Wright
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Born into the beautiful bedlam of downtown New York in the eighties, iO Tillett Wright came of age at the intersection of punk, poverty, heroin, and art. This was a world of self-invented characters, glamorous superstars, and strung-out sufferers, ground zero of drag and performance art. Still, no personality was more vibrant and formidable than iO's mother's. Rhonna, a showgirl and young widow, was a mercurial, erratic glamazon. She was iO's fiercest defender and only authority in a world with few boundaries and even fewer indicators of normal life.
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Can’t wait for more from this Author!
- By Team Hobson on 07-24-19
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Stories I'd Tell in Bars
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jen Lancaster, John Fletcher
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- Unabridged
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Unfiltered. Unapologetic. Older, but not wiser, Lancaster goes back to basics in this hilarious essay collection about everything from taking community policing classes to accidentally getting high with her waiter after a fancy dinner. These are the tales she'd tell if she met you in a bar... if she weren't too lazy to put on pants and go to a bar. Offering advice ranging from how to remain happily married to a man who refuses to blow his damn nose already to not creating An Incident at the cheese counter during an attempt at Whole30, she's you, only louder.
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self absorbed
- By D D H on 06-15-19
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Kissing Games of the World
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- Narrated by: Myra Platt
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- Unabridged
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What if the one person you can't bear to be with is also the one person you can't bear to be without? Jamie McClintock is a free-spirited artist and single mother who has at last found peace and freedom sharing a farmhouse with an elderly man and his young grandson. But when the old man dies suddenly her idyllic country life comes to a halt as the old man's estranged son, Nate, returns to claim the house and his child.
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Great Writer, Great Narrator ! Loved it!
- By Ms. Critic on 05-30-09
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What listeners say about Someone Could Get Hurt
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Bailey
- 06-11-13
Funny
Which scene was your favorite?
When he was talking about the first few weeks of having a newborn. I could totally relate
Any additional comments?
Good book, wish it was longer.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Ryan D. Sullivan
- 02-05-17
Drew Magary is a Total Jerk
I read this book a few years ago and genuinely loved it then. For some reason the audio book got on my radar and I decided to try it out. I'm so glad I did. Drew is clearly emotionally invested in this book. You could hear it as he told the stories from his life. He has a unique ability to put you on a rollercoaster of emotion, especially if you've shared any of his more dramatic life experiences. The NICU is the best/worst thing in the world, and as he told his story I got incredibly emotional, something a grown ass man should never do. And this is why Drew Magary is a total jerk.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 12-18-19
Raw. Real. Relatable. Refreshing
This is the best book written from a fatherhood perspective. It was raw, real, relatable, and refreshing. If you are a parent, especially a dad, you will enjoy this one.
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- Michael Odlyzko
- 05-25-24
Great reading of uneven provocative memoir essays
There are brilliant self-effacing and no-nonsense stories (and opinions) in here. There are also plenty of gross, abrasive, and boring bits. Good audiobook reading that could have been great with a more mature voice and/or some shrewd editing. Drew is an interesting writer, i hope to keep exploring over time.
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- Cody
- 01-20-20
Couldn't finish it.
The language/imagery just aren't my style. I simply didnt enjoy listening after putting about an hour into this one.
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- Reader
- 07-22-17
Love Drew Magary's style
Your story is so powerful, real and touching while also funny! I can't wait to get into your next book, keep them coming!
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- masterchief147
- 10-04-18
Excellent!
Laugh out loud funny, yet also very heartwarming. A very cleverly written and enjoyable narrative!
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- Tom Craven
- 12-05-16
Enjoyable book that is perfect for new fathers
I loved listening to this on later this leave while taking care of my 3 week old NICU alumna. The audio version is excellent - the author does his children's voices, sings, and really adds to the experience.
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- MissAmy72
- 02-27-17
Wow!
I laughed hysterically at this book. I saw a lot of negative comments about how the shower incident was "so unsettling" and terrible. I am more bothered by the fact that the children ran the whole house. What do we think parents are for? Discipline and guidance. Yes, you must keep your wits and remain calm. But the reason kids continue to run roughshod over adults is because they are ALLOWED to do so. I have 2 grown kids and I am one of those parents that are totally disgusted when parents allow such lunacy and disrespect (hot tub incident).
That being said, I was so touched by his love for his children and his honest introspection, that I worked my way around the disrespectful behavior that was allowed to go on. This book was simultaneously hilarious and deeply moving. I recommend it to anyone that has kids. Not only as therapy and levity but as a reminder of what you'll deal with if you allow children to remain unchecked with no consequences.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Jennifer
- 06-18-20
Relatable
When this book first opened, we're presented with a fairly serious situation and I thought, "This isn't funny, it's not what I expected." And then it turns around. Often, you can see your own parenting in his - and you can also find yourself thinking, "Well, that's what happens when you let the kids run all over you...". But it was laugh out loud funny at times, tear provoking others. Definitely worth a read if you've ever thought you were completely f@#king your kids up with your parenting.
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