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None of This Rocks
- A Memoir
- Narrated by: Joe Trohman
- Length: 7 hrs and 24 mins
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Publisher's summary
The lead guitarist and cofounder of Fall Out Boy shares personal stories from his youth and his experiences of modern rock and roll stardom in this memoir filled with wit and wisdom.
Trohman cofounded Fall Out Boy with Pete Wentz in the early aughts, and he’s been the sticky element of the metaphorical glue-like substance holding the band together ever since, over the course of a couple decades that have included massive success, occasional backlashes, and one infamous four-year hiatus. Trohman was, and remains, the emotive communicator of the group: the one who made sure they practiced, who copied and distributed the flyers, and who took the wheel throughout many of the early tours. As soon as he was old enough to drive, that is—because he was all of 15 years old when they started out. That’s part of the story Trohman tells in this memoir, which provides an indispensable inside perspective on the history of Fall Out Boy for their legions of fans. But Trohman has a great deal more to convey, thanks to his storytelling chops, his unmistakable voice, and his unmitigated sense of humor in the face of the tragic and the absurd.
None of This Rocks chronicles a turbulent life that has informed Trohman’s music and his worldview. His mother suffered from mental illness and multiple brain tumors that eventually killed her. His father struggled with that tragedy, but was ultimately a supportive force in Trohman’s life who fostered his thirst for knowledge. Trohman faced antisemitism in small-town Ohio, and he witnessed all levels of misogyny, racism, and violence amid the straight edge hardcore punk scene in Chicago. Then came Fall Out Boy. From the guitarist’s very first glimpses of their popular ascension, to working with his heroes like Anthrax’s Scott Ian, to writing for television with comedian Brian Posehn, Trohman takes listeners backstage, into the studio, and onto his couch. He shares his struggles with depression and substance abuse in a brutally honest and personal tone that listeners will appreciate. Not much of this rocks, perhaps, but it all adds up to a fascinating music memoir unlike any you’ve ever hear.
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Elliott Smith was one of the most gifted songwriters of the 90s, adored by fans for his subtly melancholic words and melodies. The sadness had its sources in life. There was trauma from an early age, years of drug abuse, and a chronic sense of disconnection that sometimes seemed self-engineered. Smith died violently in LA in 2003, under what some believe to be questionable circumstances, of stab wounds to the chest. By this time fame had found him, and record-buyers who shared the listening experience felt he spoke directly to them from beyond: astute, damaged, lovelorn, fighting, until he could fight no more.
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Almost interesting, often overwrought, poorly read
- By PerpetualGeorge on 01-27-14
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Anger Is an Energy
- My Life Uncensored
- By: John Lydon
- Narrated by: Derek Perkins
- Length: 18 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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John Lydon is an icon - one of the most recognizable and influential cultural figures of the last 40 years. As Johnny Rotten, he was the lead singer of the Sex Pistols, the world's most notorious band. The Pistols shot to fame in the mid-1970s with songs such as "Anarchy in the U.K." and "God Save the Queen". So incendiary was their impact at the time that in their native England, the Houses of Parliament questioned whether they violated the Traitors and Treasons Act.
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I Just Can't
- By notamatopoeia on 12-30-15
By: John Lydon
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Got The Life
- By: Fieldy
- Narrated by: William Dufris
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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By all appearances, Fieldy had the life. But he was on the dark path of excess, alienating friends, families, and loved ones, nearly destroying himself and the band. It took an unexpected tragedy to straighten him out: the death of his father, a born-again Christian, to a mysterious illness. Following his father's dying wish, Fieldy found God. Filled with the spirit of his new faith, Fieldy quit drugs and drinking cold turkey, and found the best part of himself.
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Good story, poor Narrator!
- By Aaron on 11-01-11
By: Fieldy
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Swimming with the Blowfish
- Hootie, Healing, and One Hell of a Ride
- By: Jim Sonefeld
- Narrated by: Jim Sonefeld
- Length: 8 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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The ultimate front-row seat to the rise, fall, and rebirth of a band that was - for a time - the biggest in the world, Hootie & the Blowfish, and Jim Sonefeld’s shattering and redeeming spiritual path from addiction to recovery and a more fruitful life.
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An Honest Reflection
- By Rob M. on 08-11-24
By: Jim Sonefeld
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This Is Gonna Hurt
- Music, Photography, and Life Through the Distorted Lens of Nikki Sixx
- By: Nikki Sixx
- Narrated by: Nikki Sixx
- Length: 3 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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This Is Gonna Hurt: Music, Photography And Life Through The Distorted Lens Of Nikki Sixx, is all Nikki Sixx. It is a collection of compelling photography and stories that capture the rage, love, optimism, darkness, and determination that shape his work.
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MUST HAVE!!
- By Yvonne on 05-28-11
By: Nikki Sixx
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Bare Bones
- I'm Not Lonely If You're Reading This Book
- By: Bobby Bones
- Narrated by: Bobby Bones
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Growing up poor in Mountain Pine, Arkansas, with a young, addicted mom, Bobby Estell fell in love with country music. Abandoned by his father at the age of five, Bobby saw the radio as his way out - a dream that came true in college when he went on air at the Henderson State University campus station broadcasting as Bobby Bones while simultaneously starting The Bobby Bones Show at 105.9 KLAZ.
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A look inside the narcissist life of Bobby Bones.
- By Selena on 05-20-16
By: Bobby Bones
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You're Making Me Hate You
- A Cantankerous Look at the Common Misconception That Humans Have Any Common Sense Left
- By: Corey Taylor
- Narrated by: Corey Taylor
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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In the tradition of the late, great George Carlin, Corey Taylor, the lead singer of Slipknot and Stone Sour, sounds off in hilarious fashion about the many vagaries of modern life that piss him off. Whether it's people's rude behavior in restaurants and malls, the many indignities of air travel, eye-searingly terrible fashion choices, dangerously clueless drivers, and - most of all - the sorry state of much modern music, Taylor's humor and insight cover civil society's seeming decline.
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New perspective.
- By jeremy on 09-22-15
By: Corey Taylor
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Dirty Daddy
- The Chronicles of a Family Man Turned Filthy Comedian
- By: Bob Saget
- Narrated by: Bob Saget
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Millions of viewers know and love Bob Saget from his role as the sweetly neurotic father on the smash hit Full House, and as the charming wisecracking host of America's Funniest Home Videos. And then there are the legions of fans who can't get enough of his scatological, out-of-his-mind stand-up routines, comedy specials, and outrageously profane performances in such shows as HBO's Entourage and the hit documentary The Aristocrats.
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Meh to the 2nd Power
- By Hilary on 06-30-14
By: Bob Saget
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BRAVE
- By: Rose McGowan
- Narrated by: Rose McGowan
- Length: 6 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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In a strange world where Rose McGowan was continually on display, stardom soon became a personal nightmare of constant exposure and sexualization. Rose escaped into the world of her mind, something she had done as a child, and into high-profile relationships. Every detail of her personal life became public, and the realities of an inherently sexist industry emerged with every script, role, public appearance, and magazine cover. The Hollywood machine packaged her as a sexualized bombshell, hijacking her image and identity and marketing them.
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I always wondered what it was like to be Rose
- By Bobbie J Daniel on 03-01-18
By: Rose McGowan
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The Gospel According to Luke
- By: Steve Lukather
- Narrated by: Steve Lukather
- Length: 10 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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In this incisive memoir, Steve Lukather tells the complete Toto story. He also lifts the lid on what went on behind the closed studio doors, shedding light on the unique creative processes of some of the most legendary names in music: from Quincy Jones, Michael Jackson, Paul McCartney, Stevie Nicks, and Elton John to Miles Davis, Joni Mitchell, Bruce Springsteen, and Aretha Franklin. Lukather’s extraordinary tale also encompasses the dark side of stardom and the American Dream. Frank, engaging, and often hilarious, The Gospel According to Luke is no ordinary rock memoir.
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Wow Best Rock Biography Ever
- By Hercules on 09-29-18
By: Steve Lukather
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Wild Tales
- A Rock & Roll Life
- By: Graham Nash
- Narrated by: Graham Nash
- Length: 12 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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From Graham Nash - the legendary musician and founding member of the iconic bands Crosby, Stills & Nash and The Hollies - comes a candid and riveting autobiography that belongs on the reading list of every classic rock fan.
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The Best of the Recent Rock Biographies
- By Steven Schuster on 10-28-13
By: Graham Nash
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Turn Around Bright Eyes
- A Karaoke Love Story
- By: Rob Sheffield
- Narrated by: Rob Sheffield
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Turn Around Bright Eyes picks up Sheffield’s story right after Love Is a Mix Tape. He is a young widower devastated by grief, trying to build a new life in a new town after his wife’s death. As a writer for Rolling Stone, he naturally takes solace in music. But that’s when he discovers the sublime ridiculousness of karaoke, and despite the fact that he can’t carry a tune, he begins to find his voice.
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Witty (sometimes sad) love story/Soundtrack
- By Wally Tonra on 05-07-15
By: Rob Sheffield
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Liner Notes
- On Parents & Children, Exes & Excess, Death & Decay, & a Few of My Other Favorite Things
- By: Loudon Wainwright III
- Narrated by: Loudon Wainwright III
- Length: 10 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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A memoir by the influential Grammy Award-winning singer and actor - son of journalist Loudon Wainwright, former husband of Kate McGarrigle and Suzzy Roche, and father of Rufus Wainwright, Martha Wainwright, Lucy Wainwright Roche, and Lexie Kelly Wainwright - a captivating meditation on relationships and creativity from the patriarch of one of America's great musical families. With a career spanning more than four decades, Loudon Wainwright III has established himself as one of the most enduring singer-songwriters who emerged from the late '60s.
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Best ever book for listening
- By Jeff Bernhardt on 10-29-17
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The Diva Rules
- Ditch the Drama, Find Your Strength, and Sparkle Your Way to the Top
- By: Michelle Visage
- Narrated by: Michelle Visage
- Length: 3 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Michelle Visage is not your average diva. Powerful, positive, and polished, this diva's not only glamorous, she's a savvy businesswoman with serious credentials who works her tail off. From her days vogueing in the downtown Manhattan clubs in the '90s to her successful career in radio and her ultimate cult status as a judge on RuPaul's Drag Race, Michelle has achieved her dreams and then some!
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A Whole Lot of Nothing
- By teal on 04-29-16
By: Michelle Visage
What listeners say about None of This Rocks
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Cailin
- 01-22-23
As a FOB fan girl it was a 10/10
Joe!
This book was raw and performed so so so well! Mental health and families suck a lot sometimes but hearing your story was something I’m very thankful for. Take all the time you need to get good bro, see you on the other side!
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- Jsb509
- 10-01-23
Loved learning about Joe
As a diehard fan of Fall Out Boy from the very beginning, it was really insightful to learn about Joe. I loved getting to know more about him, and hope he knows how many people love him!
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- Matthew S. Matson
- 11-06-24
A delight!
I really enjoyed hearing all the anecdotes about growing up, personal relationships and the eventual formation and inner workings of Fall Out Boy. One need not even be a FOB fan to enjoy this memoir - it's great regardless.
Besides discussing being a professional musician it was very candid about the struggles of addiction, mental health and complicated family dynamics which can affect anyone. There's a delightful bit of brevity between such serious subject matter with jokes and accounts of childhood character building moments interjected throughout. Joe Trohman delivers a well done book in general, not just for many diehard Fall Out Boy fans of the world.
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- cat
- 02-15-23
Probably would have enjoyed print version better
Almost turned it off because Joe's voice is like nails on a chalkboard, but the story kept me interested enough that I never did! I truly appreciate Joe for being so open about his mental health struggles. If you read this Joe, know that we appreciate you for putting yourself out there and chipping away at the stigma of mental illness.
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- Crash
- 04-01-24
You're worth it!
I'm not gonna lie. I only picked this book because I had some credits and was in a rush to have something downloaded before I went off grid and I've been really into the stories behind the scenes of the music of my teen years recently. This book was awesome though. Extremely relatable and humble. Honestly some of the feelings Joe describes made me feel like I was crazy and if someone kind of like me can do all that I'm gonna be alright. and to Joe, bro you earned it, you're worth it, and stop worrying that you're bothering everyone. I know you can't but you're the shit and I'm really greatful I got to hear your story!
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- Samantha Dydiw
- 04-09-24
Joe rocks
Very impressed by and thoroughly enjoyed Joe’s writing, storytelling, and humor. I was even more excited to listen when I saw that he narrated the audiobook himself! Joe’s book is honest and vulnerable, yet down-to-earth and relatable. A really well-written, entertaining, and interesting insight into Joe’s life. I hope there will be more to come from Joe!
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- Deanna
- 04-23-24
Fascinating, witty, and raw
A refreshing memoir that seems more like a heart-to-heart with a good friend than a celebrity tell-all. Through candid anecdotes and self-depreciating humor his unfiltered storytelling is relatable and compelling. From the exhilarating highs of performing on stage to the crushing lows of self-doubt and creative struggles, Joe really peels back the layers of the man behind the guitar. This book definitely tops my list of favorite memoirs and is an absolute must read for FOB fans!
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- Nametags
- 09-13-22
All of this rules!
An illuminating journey through Joe Trohman’s life and his personal struggles. A quick “read” that any fan of any of his music can and should read.
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- Matthew O'Neil
- 09-15-22
Interesting man
Of course I got a copy of the memoir of Fall Out Boy’s guitarist. Having bought their Fueled by Ramen debut purely out of the interest in their band name, I felt like I grew up with the band. This led to buying their Jack-Ass style DVD, seeing music videos of Trohman throwing himself around, and concerts to see him destroy himself live for the performance.
It’s curious to hear it from the perspective of the very person that made me want to attend their live shows. The reason behind the antics, what was going on behind closed doors, and then lots of backstory that led to his decision to pursue music.
It was a bit of a struggle listening at times. Trohman’s writing feels like reading a high schooler’s English paper with all the jokes they want to make actually making it onto the page. It’s an endearing aspect of the storytelling, and Trohman is a talented storyteller, but it made me cringe at times.
If you don’t mind that, then otherwise the book is a captivating read.
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- Sharai B.
- 09-18-23
It’s Okay to Not Be Okay
Thank you for being willing to share so much of yourself in this. I can only imagine what it must’ve been like to write about these vulnerable parts of you, not sure how it would be received. Know that you should be beyond proud of all the hard work you put into it. It’s well paced and structured. And having you narrate it makes your words even more poignant.
So much of the mental health struggle and growing pains that you experienced since childhood deeply resonated with me. I’m 33 and still feel hopeless most days. My mental illnesses are paralyzing. I constantly deal with the fear that I am never enough; that I don’t belong. Your book reminded me of how important it is to have the right support and to not give up.
I started listening to FOB this year after going to night 2 in LA with my cousin and partner; they’ve both been fans since TTTYG. We loved the concert so much, we drove to Mountain View for the next show and bought tickets to four shows next year.
Thank you for being you, for still being here, and for beating the shit out of that white supremacist. You make a difference and damn good art. I listened to The Damn Things and love all the songs! Keep going, Joe!
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