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Nearly All the Men in Lagos Are Mad
Stories
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Narrated by:
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Anniwaa Buachie
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Thabang Makhubela
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By:
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Damilare Kuku
About this listen
The anti-rom-com debut collection that took Nigeria by storm, featuring twelve “bewitching and revelatory” (The New York Times) and “ridiculously entertaining” (Booklist starred review) stories about the perils and pitfalls of dating men in Lagos, from a rising star of Nollywood
“Sharply observational, funny and profound, this book is dynamic sociological satire that is as universal as it is specific.”—Bolu Babalola, author of Reese's Book Club pick and national bestseller Honey and Spice
One night, you will calmly put a knife to your husband's private part and promise to cut it off. It will scare him so much that the next day, he will call his family members for a meeting in the house. He will not call your family members, but you will not care. You won’t need them.
In this remarkable short story collection, Damilare Kuku takes us deep into the heart of modern Lagos, Nigeria’s largest city, and the lives of a collection of audacious women who cope with romantic difficulties by brilliantly turning the tables on the men who wrong them.
One hardworking married woman calmly threatens sharp-edged revenge on her lazy, hypocritical husband. Another skillfully protects her own business interests by shielding her pastor-husband from allegations of cheating that may or may not be true. A group of wealthy wives deceived by their husbands join forces in a WhatsApp support group called the Virtuous Wives Guild. And a discerning dater fed up with Nigerian men makes a vow to date only oyibos before discovering that white men can act just as badly.
A bestseller in Damilare Kuku’s native Nigeria, Nearly All the Men in Lagos Are Mad is a raunchy, satisfying, and outrageous listen steeped in the chaos and allure of sub-Saharan Africa’s largest city. It’s also a love letter to Nigerian women: the women in these stories may be confronted at every turn with liars, scammers, and cheaters in their quests for love, but they always figure out how to come out victorious.
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Who is Audrey Hoedemaker? It's a question her sister Maureen has heard more times than she can count, and she doesn't know what the short answer would be. Little sister, troubled teen, backpacker, musical theatre coach, con artist, childcare worker. Murderer. A tragic, traumatic childhood casts a long shadow on the Hoedemaker sisters. Maureen has worked hard to move beyond the violence of the past and build a good, honest life for herself. Audrey, however, just can't seem to do the same, careening from one state of chaos to another.
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Good read with a not so good ending.
- By Katie A Scribner on 12-26-24
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The Art of War
- By: Sun Tzu
- Narrated by: Aidan Gillen
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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The 13 chapters of The Art of War, each devoted to one aspect of warfare, were compiled by the high-ranking Chinese military general, strategist, and philosopher Sun-Tzu. In spite of its battlefield specificity, The Art of War has found new life in the modern age, with leaders in fields as wide and far-reaching as world politics, human psychology, and corporate strategy finding valuable insight in its timeworn words.
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The actual book The Art of War, not a commentary
- By Nemo71 on 12-31-19
By: Sun Tzu
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Fahrenheit 451
- By: Ray Bradbury
- Narrated by: Tim Robbins
- Length: 5 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family."
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Wish I Hadn't Cliff Noted This in High School
- By Joel on 03-27-17
By: Ray Bradbury
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The Mistake
- By: K. L. Slater
- Narrated by: Lucy Price-Lewis
- Length: 8 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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You think you know the truth about the people you love. But one discovery can change everything.... Eight-year-old Billy goes missing one day, out flying his kite with his sister Rose. Two days later he is found dead. Sixteen years on, Rose still blames herself for Billy's death. How could she have failed to protect her little brother? Rose has never fully recovered from the trauma, and one of the few people she trusts is her neighbour Ronnie, who she has known all her life.
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How much do we really know about the ones we love?
- By T. West on 12-03-17
By: K. L. Slater
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Brain Damage
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Megan Tusing
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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As Charly struggles to recover from her brain injury, she begins to realize that the events of that fateful night are trapped in the damaged right side of her brain. Now, she must put the jigsaw pieces together to discover the identity of the man who tried to kill her...before he finishes the job he started.
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Who Else Laughed, Cried, and Shuddered?
- By Jennifer Chichester on 09-16-22
By: Freida McFadden
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Ghost Stories: Stephen Fry's Definitive Collection
- By: Stephen Fry, Washington Irving, M.R. James, and others
- Narrated by: Stephen Fry
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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As the days grow shorter and the temperature drops, Halloween approaches. Come, brave listener, pull up a chair, and spend some time with master storyteller Stephen Fry as he tells us some of his favourite ghost stories of all time, in truly terrifying spatial audio. From the headless horseman of Sleepy Hollow to the tortured spirits of M.R. James, from Edgar Allan Poe’s terrifying tale of a doppelganger to Charlotte Riddell’s Open Door that should definitely stay shut, join Stephen as he tells you some truly terrifying tales.
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Wonderful narration. Mediocre stories.
- By Michael Fuchs on 11-07-23
By: Stephen Fry, and others
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Slayers: A Buffyverse Story
- By: Christopher Golden, Amber Benson
- Narrated by: Amber Benson, Charisma Carpenter, James Charles Leary, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Original Recording
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Story
Original cast members from the beloved TV series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, reunite for an all-new adventure about connections that never die—even if you bury them. A decade has passed since the epic final battle that concluded Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV). The game-changing spell that gave power to all potential Slayers persists. With new Slayers constantly emerging, things are looking grim for the bad guys.
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A dream come true
- By Anonymous User on 10-12-23
By: Christopher Golden, and others
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He Who Fights with Monsters 2
- A LitRPG Adventure (He Who Fights with Monsters, Book 2)
- By: Shirtaloon, Travis Deverell
- Narrated by: Heath Miller
- Length: 22 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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But Jason Asano is settling into his new life. Now, a contest draws young elites to the city of Greenstone to compete for a grand prize. Jason must gather a band of companions if he is to stand a chance against the best the world has to offer. While the young adventurers are caught up in competition, the city leaders deal with revelations of betrayal as a vast and terrible enemy is revealed. Although Jason seems uninvolved, he has unknowingly crossed the enemy’s path before.
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Contrary to common reviews
- By Karen on 05-21-21
By: Shirtaloon, and others
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Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
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Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Jialing is only seven years old in 1908, when she is abandoned in the courtyard of a once-lavish estate near Shanghai. Jialing is zazhong - Eurasian - and faces a lifetime of contempt from both Chinese and Europeans. Without her mother's protection, she can survive only if the estate's new owners, the Yang family, agree to take her in.
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Set in 1982, in rural, racially divided Ricksville, Mississippi Wade in the Water tells the story of Ella, a Black, unloved, precocious eleven-year-old, and Ms. St. James, a mysterious white woman from Princeton who appears in Ella’s community to carry out some research. Soon, Ms. St. James befriends Ella, who is willing to risk everything to keep her new friend in a town that does not want her there.
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Early 1900s London: Taken from his homeland, twelve-year-old Celestine spends most of the time locked away in the attic of a large house by the sea. The only time Celestine isn’t bound by confines of the small space is when he is acting as an unpaid servant to English explorer Sir Richard Babbington, As the years pass, he desperately clings on to memories of his family in Africa, even as he struggles to remember his mother’s face, and sometimes his real name . . .
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Read/ listen to this book!
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When Tia accidentally overhears a whispered conversation between her mother—terminally ill and lying in a hospital bed in Port Harcourt, Nigeria—and her aunt, the repercussions will send her on a desperate quest to uncover a secret her mother has been hiding for nearly two decades. Back home in Lagos a few days later, Adunni, a plucky fourteen-year-old runaway, is lying awake in Tia’s guest room. Having escaped from her rural village in a desperate bid to seek a better future, she’s finally found refuge with Tia, who has helped her enroll in school.
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Didn’t disappoint!
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Justin C. Key has long been obsessed with monsters. Reading R. L. Stine’s Goosebumps as a kid, he imagined himself battling monsters and mayhem to a triumphant end. But when watching Scream 2, in which the movie’s only Black couple is promptly killed off, he realized that the Black and Brown characters in his favorite genre were almost always the victim or villain—if they were portrayed at all.
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Review by the author
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Dele Weds Destiny
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Funmi, Enitan, and Zainab first meet at university in Nigeria and become friends for life despite their differences. Funmi is beautiful, brash, and determined; Enitan is homely and eager, seeking escape from her single mother's smothering and needy love; Zainab is elegant and reserved, raised by her father's first two wives after her mother's death in childbirth. Their friendship is complicated but enduring, and over the course of the novel, the listener learns about their loves and losses.
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It’s over?!?!
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What listeners say about Nearly All the Men in Lagos Are Mad
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- Anonymous User
- 07-15-24
Unflinchingly Real!
The author crafted unflinchingly real moments, some of which were painful, yet necessary in order to fully appreciate each snapshot into the characters' lives. A smattering of humor in unexpected places steadied journeys that are carefully measured, beautifully written, perfectly narrated. Well done all!
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- Anonymous User
- 05-20-24
Sexy stories about trash men!
Thoroughly enjoyed all the stories and loved that some of them took me for a loop. Definitely for the grown and sexy woman who has met these kinds of men or even just heard of them. Very funny and entertaining from start to finish.
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- ugonna
- 09-02-24
True story....got it very right
Great stories of what life is like In Lagos. Very funny and vivid descriptions. I thought the sex acts were a bit too much. The narrators were good.
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- Black Women Read Too
- 03-19-24
So Good !!! So GOOD
I love every single story in this book. I cannot believe how good this book was. I am a short story fanatic. These were AMAZING
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- Msada
- 11-29-24
A narrator can make a story
I really wanted to immerse myself into this book after “only a big bum bum matters tomorrow.” Performed by a phenomenal narrator. I was hooked! I wanted more of her books until this. The narrator ruined the experience. Hard to get through the thick accent, and hearing the dialects butchered killed my ears, she’s definitely not Nigerian (not that she needs to be).
Suffice to say, an audiobook is as enjoyable as its narrator.
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1 person found this helpful
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Story
- Doussou Camara
- 06-11-24
AMAZING STORYTELLING
This story is such a page turner! I tried to prolong finishing it as long as I could. I can’t wait to re-read it.
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- Phebe
- 10-23-24
Amazing narrator
This was one of the best narrations I’ve ever heard! The stories were so great to listen to.
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- Omotoye Makinde
- 03-23-24
Interesting short stories
The narration was terrible, especially the female narrator. The accent was all over the place and somehow managed to turn every sentence into an aggressive spew.
Audible, for what it’s worth, i’m a british american nigerian with voice performance experience. We can do better for these writers and these stories.
This narration made it really hard to listen to what should have been a thoroughly entertaining and relatable read. Y’all didn’t do right by this author
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- Jamani Swift
- 07-30-24
Rated RG for Real Grown 👍🏾
Strong start….
It is a series of completely unrelated stories.The Story-telling format at one point was a one-sided conversation 😖 other than that it was an interesting read. Rated RG for Real Grown lol sexual content is strong while not raunchy.
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
- Joy
- 11-26-24
Good Story, Horrible Narration
The female narrator ruined the story. Her rendering was insufferable. I’m not sure what her accent was supposed to be; but her narrating efforts greatly undermined what would’ve been an impactful story. She made listening incredibly difficult.
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