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Men Have Called Her Crazy

By: Anna Marie Tendler
Narrated by: Anna Marie Tendler
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Publisher's summary

A powerful memoir that reckons with mental health as well as the insidious ways men impact the lives of women.

In early 2021, popular artist Anna Marie Tendler checked herself into a psychiatric hospital following a year of crippling anxiety, depression and self-harm. Over two weeks, she underwent myriad psychological tests, participated in numerous therapy sessions, connected with fellow patients and experienced profound breakthroughs, such as when a doctor noted, “There is a you inside that feels invisible to those looking at you from the outside.”

In Men Have Called Her Crazy, Tendler recounts her hospital experience as well as pivotal moments in her life that preceded and followed. As the title suggests, many of these moments are impacted by men: unrequited love in high school; the twenty-eight-year-old she lost her virginity to when she was sixteen; the frustrations and absurdities of dating in her mid-thirties; and her decision to freeze her eggs as all her friends were starting families.

This stunning literary self-portrait examines the unreasonable expectations and pressures women face in the 21st century. Yet overwhelming and despairing as that can feel, Tendler ultimately offers a message of hope. Early in her stay in the hospital, she says, “My wish for myself is that one day I’ll reach a place where I can face hardship without trying to destroy myself.” By the end of the book, she fulfills that wish.

©2024 Anna Marie Tendler (P)2024 Simon & Schuster Audio

What listeners say about Men Have Called Her Crazy

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Felt incomplete

I was quite excited for this book, having been a fan of AMT’s artistic work for a few years. The narration was done well and added to the listening experience, it always feels special to listen to a story told in the author’s voice and cadence. However, the story felt incomplete. The discussion around the patriarchy seemed shallow due to Tendler’s lack of examination of how race and social class contributes to it, which is unfortunate because the topic comes up often. Another factor that contributed to the book’s incomplete feeling was the absence of John Mulaney. I knew beforehand that he would not be mentioned and there is probably a valid reason for that, but his absence left a gaping hole in the middle of the story, making it feel disjointed.
There also seemed to be a lack of sensitivity when Tendler mentioned her eating disorder. The book states her exact weight at her hospitalization intake (which can be distressing to those with eating disorders, especially because EDs are competitive), she repeatedly mentions her thinness, and does not talk about any steps to recovery in that area. There was slightly more attention given to DBT for Tendler’s anxiety and suicidality.
Overall, the book had some interesting/insightful sections, but felt like it was still missing things. It seems as though the story was written too early, more reflection and life experience would be beneficial.

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Vulnerability

This was such a raw and beautiful book. I empathized with Anna so much and also related to her feelings. I have never loved or needed a book this much. Thank you Anna.

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Very relatable

Its a slow burn. It is very relatable to what women go through with men in the dating world. I was surprised at how similar the behaviors were from the men she dated to the men I've dated. I even had a similar Mother. Interesting how alike the experiences are from female to female. Also her anxiety, depression to ovarian cysts was like my experience. I was never hospitalized but I've been through the hormonal loopdy lou.

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Loved it.

Highly recommended. There’s been criticism because Tendler left Mulaney mostly out of the book, but I really appreciate this move. It allowed me to understand her more as an individual than an extension of another person. She’s a fascinating person on her own.

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Phenomenal!

This book is phenomenal. Cannot recommend the audiobook enough, hearing Anna Marie Tendler speak her art out loud gives it further dimension. Recommend for anyone, but especially women born in the 80s and coming of age in the 90s and early 2000s - the personal social dynamics described within the larger cultural framework feel deeply relatable. Looking forward to further works by this author.

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Food for my soul

This book was like eating an incredibly delicious, comforting meal. I devoured it. It’s honest and vulnerable and sad and funny. I think if you or anyone you know struggles mentally, it’s a must-read. If you are a woman or you have women in your life, it’s a must-read. It’s such a relatable and helpful reminder that life is not linear, cycles are really hard to break, and that things actually can get better.

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Honest

an honest story that i think needs to be heard. Not an untypical experience but she made it ok to talk about it.

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Devastating and Beautiful

The raw emotions and account of this book took my breath away. Tendler’s way of building a narrative of her navigation of a mental break was honest and powerful.

She is more than the exwife of a famous comedian. She is an artist and she exists outside of the small box society tries to stuff her into.

Highly recommended

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Battling demons and mental health “help”

This is a first person sharing of a mental health journey, including symptomology and going to multiple therapists and treatment centers. The author is honest, vulnerable and open with her journey and shares the ups and downs of finding treatment and help. I wish the best for this author with many many years of good mental health. Thank you for sharing your story.

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Honest and vulnerable

"Men Have Called Her Crazy" by Anna Marie Tendler is a heartfelt exploration of mental health and personal identity. The author shares her experiences with honesty and vulnerability, making her story relatable and impactful.

The writing is beautiful and the illustrations add an extra layer of emotion. Tendler's reflections of loss, and self-acceptance resonate deeply, inviting to empathize with her journey.

This book is a powerful reminder of the importance of discussing mental health openly. It’s an inspiring read for anyone looking to understand more about resilience and the human experience. Highly recommended!

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