If Only I'd Known!
How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth
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Narrated by:
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Chelsey Brooke Cole
About this listen
This therapist-written and recommended 3-part audiobook will help you understand the inner workings of a narcissist, heal from narcissistic abuse, and experience sustainable post-traumatic growth.
In relationships, have you ever found yourself:
• Feeling like something is "off," but not being able to explain why?
• Leaving conversations feeling more confused than when you started them?
• Constantly ruminating on how to "make sense" of what you feel and what's happening?
• Feeling "not enough" no matter how hard you try?
Narcissistic abuse creates a tidal wave of confusion, hypervigilance, and overthinking. You have trouble thinking clearly, remembering things, or taking in new information.
And because these changes are happening to you, you begin to wonder:
What's wrong with me?
Why can't I make this relationship work?
Am I fundamentally broken?
And that's exactly how narcissistic abuse works—it happens so subtly that you believe the insecurities you're experiencing are "you" instead of "what's happening" to you.
You think there's something wrong with you.
You think you need to change or get better.
You think no one else understands.
Narcissistic abuse is a multilayered attack on your sense of self—a dismantling of who you are and what you believe you're worth.
This audiobook covers unique information related to narcissistic abuse, including:
• How different narcissistic types love bomb
• Cognitive, emotional, behavioral, and physiological warning signs that you're being abused
• How and why narcissistic trauma bonds form and the process to untangle yourself from these binding relationships
• How to set boundaries even if you're highly empathic
• The most common reasons you stay stuck and how to get "unstuck"
If you've ever wondered:
• How did I get into this relationship?
• I'm such a people pleaser—how can I set better boundaries?
• What if healing isn't possible for me?
• I feel so lost and broken—where do I even start?
This audiobook is for you!
©2023 Chelsey Brooke Cole, LPC-MHSP, CPTT, RPT (P)2023 Chelsey Brooke Cole, LPC-MHSP, CPTT, RPTListeners also enjoyed...
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How to enrich your life and destroy doubt in five seconds. Throughout your life, you've had parents, coaches, teachers, friends, and mentors who have pushed you to be better than your excuses and bigger than your fears. What if the secret to having the confidence and courage to enrich your life and work is simply knowing how to push yourself?
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I turned it off after an hour.
- By Zac on 04-08-17
By: Mel Robbins
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The Daily Stoic
- 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living
- By: Ryan Holiday, Stephen Hanselman
- Narrated by: Brian Holsopple
- Length: 10 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Why have history's greatest minds - from George Washington to Frederick the Great to Ralph Waldo Emerson along with today's top performers, from Super Bowl-winning football coaches to CEOs and celebrities - embraced the wisdom of the ancient Stoics? Because they realize that the most valuable wisdom is timeless and that philosophy is for living a better life, not a classroom exercise. The Daily Stoic offers a daily devotional of Stoic insights and exercises, featuring all-new translations.
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Not well made as audio
- By Andreas on 12-27-16
By: Ryan Holiday, and others
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How to Train Your Mind
- Exploring the Productivity Benefits of Meditation
- By: Chris Bailey
- Narrated by: Chris Bailey
- Length: 3 hrs and 18 mins
- Original Recording
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Meditation makes you more productive because it lets you earn back time. For each minute you spend meditating, you'll earn around nine minutes back, as Chris Bailey - author of The Productivity Project and Hyperfocus - will show in this candid and counter-intuitive guide to the productivity benefits of meditation.
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Started Listening By Accident
- By T.D.Willis on 01-17-21
By: Chris Bailey
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Deep Sleep Hypnosis: Fall Asleep Instantly and Sleep Well
- By: Jasmine Harris
- Narrated by: Allison Mason
- Length: 2 hrs and 48 mins
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A lack of quality sleep can hinder your alertness and quality of life while awake, as anyone with sleeping issues already knows. Suffering through sleepless nights does not have to be your reality. Instead you can fall asleep fast and get quality sleep tonight and every night. Hypnosis has been used for centuries to cure many ailments, including the inability to get better sleep. You can help yourself improve the quality of your life with hypnotherapy.
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put me right to sleep
- By Cassandra on 05-08-17
By: Jasmine Harris
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Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
- A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed
- By: Lori Gottlieb
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley
- Length: 14 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.
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It was like a hallmark movie being waterboarded into my ears for 15 hours
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-19
By: Lori Gottlieb
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The Mastery of Self
- A Toltec Guide to Personal Freedom
- By: Don Miguel Ruiz Jr.
- Narrated by: Charlie Varon
- Length: 3 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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The ancient Toltecs believed that life, as we perceive it, is a dream. We each live in our own personal dream, and these come together to form the dream of the planet, or the world in which we live. Problems arise when our perception of the dream becomes clouded with negativity, drama, and judgment (of ourselves and others), because it's in these moments of suffering that we have forgotten that we are the architects of our own reality and we have the power to change our dream if we choose.
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listen.. .then listen again
- By Casiano on 12-22-16
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Ho Tactics
- How to MindF**k a Man into Spending, Spoiling, and Sponsoring
- By: G. L. Lambert
- Narrated by: Patrick Stevens
- Length: 9 hrs and 12 mins
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I have discovered a group of women who refuse to be exploited, are immune to manipulation, and who never settle in the name of love. These ladies know what they want and take what they want by beating men at their own game. Utilizing the secrets exposed in this book, these women gain power, money, and status. Men call them gold diggers, women call them hos, but they call themselves winners. This is the book that society doesn't want you to listen to….
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I spent $24,000 in 4 months
- By B.M. on 10-06-18
By: G. L. Lambert
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How to Say It: Words That Make a Difference
- By: Allison Friederichs Atkison, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Allison Friederichs Atkison
- Length: 4 hrs and 44 mins
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Words. We use them all the time, every day, mostly without giving them much thought at all. We take for granted that they’re here at our disposal whenever we need them. But if you’ve ever wished you could communicate more effectively, words are the place to start. It’s incumbent upon you to choose the best words to accomplish your goals, because how you choose to communicate influences—well, everything! The power of communication shapes our professional goals, our relationships, and our lives—so the words we choose to use carry a great deal of power.
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Meh. Glad I didn't pay for it.
- By Paula on 07-23-22
By: Allison Friederichs Atkison, and others
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Great except for one big thing
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Helpful with specific strategies
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What listeners say about If Only I'd Known!
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anonymous User
- 08-23-23
Dealing with a Narc? Then this is for you
This book gave me the information, insight and courage I needed to realize I’m married to a narcissist. never feeling good enough and always believe they will change for the better, this book sums it up in soluch a great way. I am so grateful for the information from Chelsey. I feel anyone who thinks they are dealing with a narcissist should have this book,
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1 person found this helpful
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- by jake
- 01-25-24
Fantastic Book!
What a fantastic book. It felt so good to be affirmed and put an explanation to the years of emotional and psychological abuse that I endured. I highly recommend!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Juan Servin
- 01-03-24
This book is amazing.
It was an amazing experience to listen to this audio book. The narrative is so close to the audience, that made me have a perfect understanding all the way from the beginning to the end. I found a profound connection with the author that I am seriously considering on sharing my story. Before I listened this audio book, it was hard to find a good resource of support for people like me. A man who was a victim of narcissistic abuse is not a common thing. All the programs out there are made for female victims. I recommend this book 1000%.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Veronica
- 09-22-23
Thank you!
I plan to listen to this beautiful book once a year as a reminder of my strength as a survivor of a narcissist mother and husband
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2 people found this helpful
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- Michelle
- 08-24-23
Losing yourself and need a roadmap? This is for U!
If Only I'd Known paints the picture so clear there is no way to deny the impact of this type of abuse, if this is what you are experiencing.
Do you feel stuck? Do not recognize yourself? Constantly questioning yourself? Feel you are not enough...YOU are not ALONE!
Chelsey has the knowledge, expertise, experience and real-life strategies to help you become armed with information that can lead to healing which leads to a way out to an abundant life that you so richly deserve. You owe it to yourself to educate yourself especially with a licensed therapist like Chelsey who has also had firsthand experience of Narcissistic Abuse.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Kim Harris
- 05-22-24
BEGINNER EMPATHY
Basic and easy to understand. A good place to start start learning about an Empath or find out if you are one.
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- Anonymous User
- 07-12-24
mot of this was an exact copy of most of my experiences.
not only is her voice very kind, inviting but also reassuring. I learn so much listening to this. I understand me more after listening to this. I feel encouraged and not as afraid of everything as I had been.... I'm ready for the next book!!
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- Primetime
- 01-20-24
Thank You So Much!
This book was exactly what I needed! Thank you so much! I so grateful! I am going to order the hard copy, too. The book is one of the best books on healing from narcissistic abuse. I absolutely recommend 👌. I am glad the author was the narrator. I felt the compassion and sincerity in her voice. I plan to use the tips to heal myself from the nightmare of my marriage to a narcissist.
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- Jason
- 11-20-23
mind blown
we have learned more about the Pilgrims in life than we do about narcissists and narcissists have had a massive impact on my life whereas pilgrims have not. this book should be required reading for everyone on the planet. for me it has been the instruction manual to my life. finally it all makes sense. read this and change your life.
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- Melissa Castro
- 08-28-23
This book could have saved decades of my life
I wish I would have read this book decades ago; it could have saved decades of my life. I missed all of the warning signs. Chelsey's book has really helped my heart heal, helped me feel not so alone, and know that this too shall pass. One thing really struck me when she said don't give him any space in your head. That's exactly what I needed to hear! I immediately stopped giving him any space in my head because he never deserved to be there in the first place. My mind is clear, and my thoughts are surrounding healing and self-care. Thank you for writing this AMAZING book and for speaking up for Women that are married to abusive narcissists.
Now that I know better, I can be better, and do better.
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