I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends
Confessions of a Reality Show Villain
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Narrated by:
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Courtney Robertson
About this listen
Courtney Robertson joined season 16 of The Bachelor looking for love. A working model and newly single, Courtney fit the casting call: She was young, beautiful, and a natural in front of the cameras. As the season unfolded and sparks began to fly, it became clear: She was not there to make friends. Courtney quickly became one of the biggest villains in Bachelor franchise history. She unapologetically pursued her man, steamrolled her competition, and broke the rules. Now, after a very public breakup with her Bachelor, Ben Flajnik, Courtney dishes on life before, during, and after The Bachelor, including Ben's romantic proposal to her on a Swiss mountaintop and the tabloid frenzy that continued after the cameras stopped rolling. Complete with stories, tips, tricks, and advice from your favorite Bachelor alumni, and filled with all the juicy details Courtney fans and foes alike want to know, I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends is a must-listen for every member of Bachelor nation.
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In the tradition of Cynthia Heimel and Chelsea Handler, and with the boisterous iconoclasm of Amy Sedaris, Julie Klausner's candid and funny debut I Don't Care about Your Band sheds light on the humiliations we endure to find love - and the lessons that can be culled from the wreckage. I Don't Care about Your Band posits that lately the worst guys to date are the ones who seem sensitive. It's the jerks in nice guy clothing, not the players in Ed Hardy, who break the hearts of modern girls.
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Shopping for Men at the Wrong Mall
- By Pamela Harvey on 01-02-13
By: Julie Klausner
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Fairy Tale Interrupted
- A Memoir of Life, Love, and Loss
- By: RoseMarie Terenzio
- Narrated by: RoseMarie Terenzio
- Length: 5 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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To everyone else, John F. Kennedy Jr. may have been American royalty, but to RoseMarie Terenzio, he was an entitled nuisance—and she wasn’t afraid to let him know it. RoseMarie was his personal assistant, his publicist, and one of his closest confidantes during the last five years of his life. In this, her first memoir, she bravely recounts her own fairy tale interrupted, describing the unlikely friendship between a blue-collar girl from the Bronx and John F. Kennedy Jr.
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Mediocre read
- By Rachel on 05-28-12
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Every Day I'm Hustling
- By: Vivica A. Fox, Kevin Carr O'Leary
- Narrated by: Vivica A. Fox
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Vivica A. Fox is a dynamo who has created a lasting career on her own, through sheer, roll-up-your-sleeves DIY hustle. Every Day I'm Hustling is a personal book with a message Fox passionately believes in: that you make your own luck, that you never ever wake up in the morning thinking somebody's going to call you and offer you that part or ask you out on that date that's going to change your life, that you have to wake up and put on your longest eyelashes and fiercest heels and go out and make your life happen yourself.
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Loved it!
- By colette on 04-09-18
By: Vivica A. Fox, and others
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I'm the One That I Want
- By: Margaret Cho
- Narrated by: Margaret Cho
- Length: 4 hrs and 57 mins
- Abridged
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I'm the One That I Want, based on her show of the same name, is filled with dead-on insights about the experience of being a woman with attitude, of flowing with the highs and lows of life, and of creating one's own identity and acceptance. It is every bit as hilarious, shocking, and irreverent as she is.
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Hilarious and deeply engrossing
- By Ling on 04-10-03
By: Margaret Cho
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White Girl Problems
- By: Babe Walker
- Narrated by: Tavia Gilbert
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Babe Walker, center of the universe, is a painstakingly manicured white girl with an expensive smoothie habit, a proclivity for Louboutins, a mysterious mother she's never met, and approximately 50 bajillion Twitter followers. But her "problems" have landed her in shopping rehab - that's what happens when you spend $246,893.50 in one afternoon at Barneys. Now she's decided to write her memoir, revealing the gut-wrenching hurdles she's had to overcome in order to be perfect in every way, every day.
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Hysterical
- By Kimberlykate on 02-01-13
By: Babe Walker
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Easy for You to Say
- By: John Melendez
- Narrated by: John Melendez
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Easy For You To Say is "Stuttering" John Melendez's memoir of his childhood being bullied in school for his stutter; his years as an on-air personality with The Howard Stern Show; and his subsequent 10-year career as a writer and on-air announcer for Jay Leno's Tonight Show. It details his famously acerbic relationships with celebrities he interviewed/insulted (Raquel Welch once punched him in the face). In the audiobook, Howard Stern emerges as a surprisingly mean, stingy, and megalomaniacal boss - and Jay Leno as a seeming sufferer from OCD.
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Was expecting more
- By Amazon Customer on 10-25-18
By: John Melendez
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Dirty Thirty
- By: Asa Akira
- Narrated by: Veronica Worthington
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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As she contemplates turning 30 years old while still being in the adult film trade, Asa Akira, author of the best-seller Insatiable, delves into her past, present, and future, exploring the events that brought her to where she is now and the surprising and insightful plans she has for her future. Internationally known as a porn star, Akira's perceptive, funny, and straightforward writings on love, sex, death, marriage, and celebrity come together in a surprising book of essays.
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this was fun I'm going to buy her other book 2
- By Sir Lawrence on 01-09-19
By: Asa Akira
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You're Better than Me
- A Memoir
- By: Bonnie McFarlane
- Narrated by: Bonnie McFarlane, Alexander Cendese
- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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In the spirit of Mindy Kaling, Kelly Oxford, and Sarah Silverman, a compulsively listenable and outrageously funny memoir of growing up as a fish out of water, finding your voice, and embracing your inner crazy person from popular actress, writer, and comedian Bonnie McFarlane.
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Sandy!!! She wrote a book...it's crazy, a book!!!
- By Jonathan Placek on 03-02-16
By: Bonnie McFarlane
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Challenge Accepted!
- 253 Steps to Becoming an Anti-It Girl
- By: Celeste Barber
- Narrated by: Celeste Barber
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Part memoir, part comedy routine, part advice manual, Challenge Accepted! is Celeste at her best, revealing her secrets to love, friendship, family, and marriage (oh hai, #hothusband), and how to deal with life’s many challenges - why she checks the bath for sharks, how Nutella quite literally shaped who she is as a woman, and why being famous on Instagram is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s real, like totally, really real.
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Prepare to crack up in the grocery store
- By Chicago_Mama on 05-30-19
By: Celeste Barber
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Here's the Story
- Surviving Marcia Brady and Finding My True Voice
- By: Maureen McCormick
- Narrated by: Maureen McCormick
- Length: 5 hrs and 58 mins
- Abridged
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Marcia Brady, eldest daughter on television's The Brady Bunch, had it all. But what viewers didn't know about the always sunny, perfect Marcia was that offscreen, her real-life counterpart, Maureen McCormick was living a very different - and not so wonderful - life. Maureen tells the shocking and inspirational true story of the beloved teen and the woman she became.
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Gripping
- By Chris on 08-12-14
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I Can Barely Take Care of Myself
- Tales from a Happy Life Without Kids
- By: Jen Kirkman
- Narrated by: Jen Kirkman
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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"You'll change your mind." That's what everyone says to Jen Kirkman - and countless women like her - when she confesses she doesn't plan to have children. But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control.
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Funny. Not fall down laughing funny, but funny
- By david on 05-22-13
By: Jen Kirkman
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I Hate Everyone, Except You
- By: Clinton Kelly
- Narrated by: Clinton Kelly
- Length: 4 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Clinton Kelly is probably best known for teaching women how to make their butts look smaller. But in I Hate Everyone, Except You, he reveals some heretofore unknown secrets about himself, like that he's a finicky connoisseur of 1980s pornography, a disillusioned critic of New Jersey's premier water parks, and perhaps the world's least enthused high school commencement speaker.
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Filthy language overshadowed stories
- By Doris on 04-29-17
By: Clinton Kelly
What listeners say about I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- PK1448
- 10-20-16
She's quite a woman great story teller
Is there anything you would change about this book?
She doesn't sound believable. Even though I saw the season I can hardly remember her, but she needs to clean up her life!
What was one of the most memorable moments of I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends?
Nothing major
What does Courtney Robertson bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
she's a great narrator
Was I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends worth the listening time?
I listened to it every night until I fell asleep and then rewound the next night to the last paragraph I remembered.
Any additional comments?
Not really!
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- Amazon Customer
- 01-18-18
Loved!!!
Loved Courtney on the Bachelor...loved being able to hear her story and her side of the story. There’s always two sides to every story. I’d defiantly recommend to Bachelor lovers (whether you liked her or not, she’ll win you over with her story!...it also gives some insight to the show and behind the scenes)
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- Cassie
- 07-31-22
Really enlightening
Courtney was not my favorite on the bachelor, but I really enjoyed this inside look into her life, what brought her to the show, and the experience of filming and dating Ben. I disagree with the reviews that say they didn't empathize with her after listening; I think anyone who's found themselves isolated in a group for no reason, who's dated a jerk, or who has let themselves believe things would be okay when the signs pointed otherwise will sympathize with Courtney after listening. Highly recommend!
Her narration won't win any awards, but it is definitely passable- not distracting from the story.
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- KJB
- 02-06-24
Honestly ben and his mom are the true villains
I’m bummed there will never be a player as great as Courtney on this show. I literally just watch it because of reading this book and the one by Amy K that expose how dirty and sick this show is. Courtney is really relatable. We’re not “girl’s girls”and we’re violently shamed for it even though women will stab each other in the back and then get dressed to take the same stabbed woman’s widowed husband at her funeral. Good on Courtney for standing her ground and speaking her truth. I would love another book from her in the future. She is also an amazing narrator. Ben is a REAL man-child and I’m glad she dodged him and his piece of work mother!!!
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- AudioAddict
- 08-05-15
Pretty good but ONLY for Bachelor fans
STORY (reality show confession) - So I must admit I'm a fan of the Bachelor and Bachelorette series. I will also say right up front that I didn't care for the choice of Ben as the Bachelor and I was one of millions who disliked Courtney, the author of this book, who is the girl Ben proposed to at the end of the season.
Anyway, I listened to this book hoping to hear the inside track on what goes on while filming the series. I learned some interesting tidbits and also heard some juicy gossip about past contestants, but I had to endure a lot about Courtney's early years, her introduction to sex, her modeling career and her name-dropping of famous guys she dated. She also gives details of her venomous relationships with the other contestants during filming, as well as a blow-by-blow account from the moment she met Ben, through their engagement and ultimately the failure of their relationship about a year later. It's her book, right, so this was her chance to vent about Ben and try to explain why she appeared like such a stuck-up b1tch on the show. All in all, I enjoyed the book, but would have preferred less Ben and way, way less Courtney.
PERFORMANCE - Courtney reads the book herself. I suppose it was good to hear her tell her own story and she does an okay job.
OVERALL - Recommended only for serious Bachelor fans and/or people who like Ben and Courtney. Some cursing and descriptions of sexual acts.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Callie Martin
- 07-13-15
I'd watch the season again if it weren't for Ben's hair
This book is for a super specific audience-- Bachelor/bachelorette lifers, aka. people who've watched for several cycles. And still remember many of the contestants. This book was fun but VERY detailed. I learned things about her that I def could've lived without knowing, but it was fun to get a behind the scenes look at the show.
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- Renee Smith
- 04-27-16
Courtney is not what I thought she was!!!
This story was very good, it explained a lot and she is not the bitch I thought she was. Now Ben was and is exactly what I thought he was a douche bag! But the story is very interesting and keeps you wanting to listen to it the whole way through. Good luck Courtney!
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- shannon
- 12-31-15
Ehhh, could've been more interesting
I have mixed feelings about the bachelor franchise but I was interested in this book because Courtney's "win" was such a scandalous event. My main problem with this book was that it was read by Courtney, she mentions that she tries to be funny, but it doesn't come across and that VERY apparent in this book. Her humor and tone is so dry it's basically monotone and seems serious.
I liked this book for the background of the bachelor insight, but the stories she told about her living in LA and dating actors was a little annoying. I also only heard her bashing blame the men in her relationships and never herself, that got exhausting. This book has the same tone as Holly Madison's new book, it's an interesting listen but it's probably much better to physically read than to hear and don't read this book expecting to like Courtney more. I feel as if that was the goal, but it didn't work at all.
If you're interested in hearing about her hooking up with Ben while on the show, then you'll want to listen.
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- ND
- 07-09-15
Funny read!
I enjoyed listening about the behind the scenes of The Bachelor and what it's really like being one of many girls after one guy. Eek!! Definitely not something I could do! It's easy to see how they can clip and choose scenes to make you look a certain way. Villain or Innocent. I laughed several times during this book at how brutally honest Courtney was about subjects most people keep private.
However, I felt that someone besides Courtney should have narrated the book. She seemed to stumble over words that clearly she doesn't use in her every day vocabulary. Also, it was kinda bland and monotone reading, but at least it had funny content to keep me entertained and listening through the entire thing.
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- Kennerly House
- 10-23-18
LOVED the book!
I loved this book! I wasn’t sure what to expect but this book had it all. The juicy bachelor details behind the scene, the background of what makes Courtney who she is (which is a really confident and witty woman with a sense of humor) - I can see in hindsight why she was so easily portrayed the villain on the show. I never thought Ben F was really looking to find a wife back then, and it’s interesting to hear her side of the story. Also I loved the details into her modeling career and her complete honesty about it all. Felt like I was dishing with a close friend. Also Courtney, if you’re reading this...I listened to this book, and I love your voice.
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