How to Bite Your Neighbor and Win a Wager
Guides for Dating Vampires, Book 1
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Narrated by:
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Simon Dornet
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By:
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D. N. Bryn
About this listen
Vincent Barnes has suffered four years as a vampire, and they've been the most miserable years of his pathetic life. Too poor for black market blood, he feeds from sleeping humans to survive. He tries to never intrude on the same prey twice, but after a single delicious taste of a long-lost childhood neighbor, he can't help returning for seconds.
Wesley Garcia has been waking up with fang marks. Lucky for him, he needs a vampire—to use as bait. He's certain Vitalis-Barron Pharmaceutical killed his mother, but to gain access to their covert research labs, he has to bring them a bloodsucker for their experiments.
Step one, a dramatic offer: Stay, and you can bite me.
Vincent leaps at the chance to gobble Wesley up.
Wes's plan is perfect. He'll befriend the vampire, then trick him into coming to the lab. No fighting, no fuss. But Vincent is more than Wesley has bargained for: sweet and shy, with intoxicating fangs that awaken new desires in Wes. As the two bond, Vincent believes he might have finally found someone worth putting his trust in . . . and Wes fears neither of them will survive the betrayal he has planned.
Contains mature themes.
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Smart-mouthed hacker Caspian escaped an abusive home at 16. Now he's one of the most sought-after black-hat hackers in the world. Jonah is a ruthless contract killer with only one weakness: the vibrant runaway he took in years ago, Caspian. But Cas bailed when he turned 18, and Jonah has maintained a steady diet of eat, kill, sleep since then. A threat to Cas' life brings him back years later - not as the boy Jonah remembers, but as a hardened computer hacker with a price on his head and a list of names everybody wants.
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Not enough story
- By Amazon Customer on 08-17-21
By: Neve Wilder, and others
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Forgotten: Luca
- The Four, Book 1
- By: Sloane Kennedy
- Narrated by: Michael Dean
- Length: 9 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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I left him behind because I had no choice.... That's what I keep telling myself, but it doesn't make it any easier to sleep at night...or to drown out the words he kept repeating over and over the day we'd met: I just want to go home. That was eight long years ago and I'd only known him as Billy, a terrified 14-year-old I'd had to leave behind to save someone else. But his name wasn't Billy and he's no longer a frightened kid lost in a world where he was nothing more than a possession.
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Disjointed and unoriginal
- By MzBond on 05-05-20
By: Sloane Kennedy
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The Lost Elemental
- Royals of Kingwood Academy, Book 1
- By: Tessa Hale
- Narrated by: Aletha George
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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It was supposed to be simple. All of that changed in a single breath. Because it turns out I'm not human. And I just knocked out the power on an entire city block. In a split second, all of my carefully-laid plans go up in smoke. There's no chance for college because I'm being hauled off to Kingwood Academy. They say it's for my own protection and those around me. But I know one thing for sure . . . I'm not welcome here.
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One of the cutest heartfelt paranormal romance books I've heard all year
- By Anonymous User on 07-07-24
By: Tessa Hale
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Sunshine and Bullets
- By: CoraLee June
- Narrated by: Benjamin D. Walker, Jo Raylan
- Length: 8 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Sunshine. It's a nickname I haven't heard since I lived on Woodbury Lane, where the houses were pretty, but the secrets? Deadly. It was a pet name known only to the Bullets. Rough, violent, and ruthless, they laid claim to the town - and my heart. I wasn't supposed to fall for a boy from the wrong side of the tracks‚ especially not four of them. But they were the only ones who understood that sometimes hell hides in plain sight.
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Wow!!
- By Reader on 06-17-19
By: CoraLee June
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Vampires Never Get Old
- Tales with Fresh Bite
- By: Zoraida Cordova - editor, Natalie C. Parker - editor
- Narrated by: Almarie Guerra, Frankie Corzo, MW Cartozian Wilson, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Thirsty for fresh blood? Sink your teeth into vampire stories from young adult fiction's leading voices. In this delicious new collection edited by Zoraida Córdova and Natalie C. Parker, you’ll find stories about the lurking vampires of social media, the rebellious vampires hungry for more than just blood, the eager vampires coming out - and going out for their first kill - and other bold, breathtaking, dangerous, dreamy, eerie, iconic, powerful creatures of the night.
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Breezy vamp fun
- By jc on 01-26-23
By: Zoraida Cordova - editor, and others
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Darkness Dawns
- Immortal Guardians Series #1
- By: Dianne Duvall
- Narrated by: Kirsten Potter
- Length: 10 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Once, Sarah Bingham's biggest challenge was making her students pay attention in class. Now, after rescuing a wounded stranger, she's landed in the middle of a battle between corrupt vampires and powerful immortals who also need blood to survive. Roland Warbrook is the most compelling man Sarah has ever laid hands on. But his desire for her is mingled with a hunger he can barely control...
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Luscious, Enthralling & Sensual w/o being porn
- By Linda on 08-16-11
By: Dianne Duvall
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Stray
- Shifters, Book 1
- By: Rachel Vincent
- Narrated by: Jennifer Van Dyck
- Length: 13 hrs and 49 mins
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"I look like an all-American grad student. But I am a werecat, a shape-shifter, and I live in two worlds. Despite reservations from my family and my Pride, I escaped the pressure to continue my species and carved out a normal life for myself. Until the night a Stray attacked."
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Loved it!
- By Alexis on 08-09-07
By: Rachel Vincent
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Since time immemorial the warriors of the Paladin Order have harnessed arcane powers to protect their rulers. For Balen, who has given up his chance at love and fought his way to the top of the Paladin Order, there can be no greater honor than to serve his king. But when assassins annihilate the royal family, Balen suddenly finds himself sworn to serve the very man he abandoned. Now with their nation threatened by enemies both within and outside the kingdom, Balen must fight hidden traitors and unnatural assassins, while also contending with the biting wit and dangerous charm of King Zavrius.
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All Casper Bell has ever wanted is to belong. But now, abandoned by his friends and family after being outed, he has nothing left to lose when the people of Novilem abduct him.
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When the Rezwyn Empire mysteriously cuts diplomatic ties with the Kingdom of Usleth, merchant lord Oren Radek is sent to investigate. But when he discovers a coup brewing against the emperor, Radek's life and his country's safety is suddenly under threat. Izra Dziove, visionary advisor to the Rezwyn Emperor, is trying to hold the turbulent Rezwyn court together while being plagued by dreams of his fated man. But when Izra's adversaries launch an attack on the diplomatic party from Usleth, he is forced to take action to protect them and prevent a war.
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so good!
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Without an academic endorsement to make him valuable to the high fey, Saffron will be sent back through the veil to the human world. The place he was traded from as a changeling-baby, and a place he is terrified of. And while getting an endorsement shouldn't be impossible, it's hindered by the fact his literacy is self-taught, using books stolen off of Morrígan Academy's campus of high fey students.
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Glad I stuck it out!
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There's an honesty in the turning of the earth, in the turning of the seasons, and I've always preferred its quiet, steadfast company over that of other people. Left alone with an inherited cottage and my beloved pup Rotho to look after, my days are largely given to tending the garden, save for periodic errands in town.
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Perfection!
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Pretty good for a debut novel
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When the Rezwyn Empire mysteriously cuts diplomatic ties with the Kingdom of Usleth, merchant lord Oren Radek is sent to investigate. But when he discovers a coup brewing against the emperor, Radek's life and his country's safety is suddenly under threat. Izra Dziove, visionary advisor to the Rezwyn Emperor, is trying to hold the turbulent Rezwyn court together while being plagued by dreams of his fated man. But when Izra's adversaries launch an attack on the diplomatic party from Usleth, he is forced to take action to protect them and prevent a war.
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so good!
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Syren sacrificed the man he loved to spare humanity from the wrath of the fae. For three hundred years, he’s been stuck on the mortal plane, floating alone in his pool while his powers slipped away. The last fae in the realm, his only companion is a mysterious bird until Audric, King of Aranthe, comes to claim his sword—the instrument that caused the rift between Faerie and the human realm.re for three centuries of touch-starvation.
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Read the book
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Married to a ruthless prince, for years Max had to serve and obey the vicious magical nobles. Now, he is one of them. When the heir to the throne attacks him, Max accidentally responds with a lethal burst of magic. Max is certain he will be executed. But his power is too rare and precious for that....
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Slow and Anticlimactic
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Only One Coffin
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I’m stuck sharing a coffin with the world’s perkiest vampire. This vacation is going to suck. After centuries of eternal existence, and still mourning the loss of my lover to vicious slayers, I needed a few days of peaceful solitude at the Hotel Draugr. But thanks to a double-booking mishap, I’m forced to share my coffin with Kilroy, a freshly bitten vampire who loves his new afterlife as much as he loves hanging ten. My unexpected roommate is determined to show me how “totally awesome” being a vampire can be.
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Clever and sweet
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Not All Himbos Wear Capes
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Big City is supposedly the place where dreams come true. As someone just trying to live my life, I can tell you it’s more like a recurring nightmare where dreams get c*ckblocked at every turn. Especially if you’re a supervillain like me. The irony is that I have zero powers, despite coming from purebred villain stock, but try telling that to Big City’s beloved hero, Captain Masculine.
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How, how, how is this so entertaining??? 🫤
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At the age of 20, I never thought I'd have to make the choice between true love or my soul. Then again, I never thought I'd be faced with any of the terrible, wonderful, impossible things that exist in Lyle Carraway's world. The vampire is a weakness I never even knew I had, and when he whispers promises of immortality and sensual luxury, it's more temptation than I can handle. Good Catholic boys from small towns aren't supposed to make deals with the devil, but I never counted on him being this hard to resist. Or being the key to the family I've always wanted.
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I love this story so much
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The Misfit Mage and His Dashing Devil
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Apprentice mage Wally spends his days cataloging rare artifacts and dreaming about finally mastering his magics and living the adventures he's always desired. Bez, a once mighty devil who craves the freedom of the outside world again, despises his confinement inside a powerful object. His only company now comes from the mages working within the archives he's stored. Among them, the most annoying of them all, an anxious and considerate Walter. When the archive is attacked, Wally and Bez each seize the opportunity to achieve their dreams—and inadvertently create a magical link between them.
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really enjoyed the slower progression
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Prince of Flowers
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Lochlann Wilde walks in the shadow of his father, a legendary summoner who commanded mythical beasts in battle. But Locke isn't legendary. He’s barely a summoner, never passing his academy’s trial of the elements. And then he accidentally summons a fae prince with a beautiful body and a bad attitude. Sylvan is fiery and ferocious, stronger than anything Locke has ever encountered. And hotter, too. But time is running out. Locke must tame the prince’s wild heart. If he fails his trial, he’ll lose his inheritance and ruin his family's name.
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New entities, new school, and a horny mc oh my!
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Pixies are supposed to be petite, beautifully lithe creatures with gossamer wings. Sporting luscious, ombre pink hair and fluttering pink wings, Phil meets two out of three of those criteria. At over six feet tall, no one would dare call Phil petite. As a home-and-hearth pixie, Phil yearns to find a home and family he can bond to. When no one's willing to hire a pixie of his stature, Phil is forced to find work elsewhere. Turns out, pixies make terrible bouncers.
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I love a good finding your place story
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A Clash of Steel: A Treasure Island Remix
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1826. The sun is setting on the golden age of piracy, and the legendary Dragon Fleet, the scourge of the South China Sea, is no more. Its ruthless leader, a woman known only as the Head of the Dragon, is now only a story, like the ones Xiang has grown up with all her life. She desperately wants to prove her worth, especially to her mother, a shrewd businesswoman who never seems to have enough time for Xiang.
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Happy Tiny Gay Heart
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Cair
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The humans and the supernaturals mostly keep to their own kind, but Luca—curious and desperate for work—crosses the border and finds himself employed by a tall, stupidly handsome Fae with killer horns. He should be intimidated, but instead, Luca is utterly captivated. Falling for the boss is a bad idea though, right?
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Good audiobook, bad split between narrators
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Dante MM
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- By: Jae Greyn
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Having brothers is detrimental to my sanity. One is safely tucked away on the mantel behind my desk, his face not quite what it should be on the urn. My twin? Sad story that. Boy meets girl, boy falls in love with girl, and girl marries a Shifter. My twin ran away. That leaves me to run the show and hunt down the Witches who just can't stop killing us. We are also at war with the Shifters, who killed my oldest brother, and by order of the Gods Council, I'm not supposed to set one toe in Shifter territory.
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Wow!!! Lance brought Jae's words to life!
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The King's Dragon
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Overall
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Story
Lord Tristram Radcliffe has a secret - he is the only dragon at the king’s court in Llangard. It’s a secret he’s kept from the knights he’s fought beside, from the ladies who bat their lashes at him, and from his closest companion, Prince Reynold. If it were to get out, he’d be banished to the Mawrcraig Mountains along with the rest of his kind, but the kingdom of men is the only one he’s ever known, and his heart lives in the stone halls of those who’d count him an enemy.
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Didn't Work For Me
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What listeners say about How to Bite Your Neighbor and Win a Wager
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Amanda P
- 08-25-24
Sweet romance
I loved the story and the flirting between the two main characters. Wished it was longer and with more spice
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- Mai Shaina
- 08-09-23
Fantastic Fluff Gay Vampire Novel
The novel overall was very good and I couldn’t stop listening! The characters are very likable and relatable. The end was unfortunately a little underwhelming. The characters’ thoughts are very explicit towards one another throughout the novel and you expect to hear/read their first time, but it fades to black. Other than gore and touching, there’s no explicit content.
If you like wholesome and emotionally intimate romance, this is for you!
The narrator is very good and distinguishes the voices very well!
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- Linda Yancey
- 08-16-23
Speed ran this in two days!
A lovely story with two very goofy but sweet characters. Plot was good, simple and contained, which I think did this book well as I enjoyed the characters dynamic more than the revenge plot. 10/10 would vampire again
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1 person found this helpful
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- :)
- 04-27-24
I finished it in one day
And I already want to listen to it again. Everything was so cute and well paced. This is my first vampire novel I've read but I couldn't have chosen a better start! I already bought the second book T.T I hope there's more to come!
The narrator was also perfect loved their voice!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Ash
- 10-15-23
Sweet and fluffy and such a TEASE!
I really enjoyed this book. I loved the two MMCs. I thought they had wonderful chemistry and I couldn't wait to get to the next part of there story and relationship. I overall and overwhelmingly loved this story
with that being said what a damn tease it was. maybe it says more about me but I am not used to reading a book that is a romance that dosnt have a full scene in it. This left me craving more and being teased with such sweet and steamy little nibbles just wasn't enough for me.
I highly recommend this book for its sweetness and fun ride.
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- Anonymous User
- 05-21-24
Amazing
I had such a great time with this audiobook! I absolutely enjoyed Simon Dornet’s narration (particularly with 1.3+ speed!), especially Vincent’s voice! Every time I heard Vinny, my heart 💗💞 Anyway, this was a joy to listen to!
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- Anna
- 06-12-24
Wes + Vinny
Overall this was a good read/listen. The storyline itself was both entertaining and adorable. The narration wasn’t bad either it was pretty good though not much of a variation between characters, but it wasn’t terrible. If you’re looking for a steamy vampire romance..look elsewhere. Where there was some spice..it was more insinuation than anything. All in all it was a decent story and will keep your interest throughout.
1.5 / 🌶️
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- Anonymous
- 12-10-23
So cute! A must listen
This book is super cute. The characters are adorable and I cannot count the number of times I said "awe" while listening. The narrator is fantastic and really brings the story and the characters to life. If you're debating over which audio book to try next, choose this one.
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- Bailey green
- 05-07-24
such a sweet story
I love how lovely the book read and was such a sweet ending. it took a while to start liking Wesley but once I did I couldn't stop😭 great book. I can't wait to read the next one
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- Andy D
- 10-26-24
Surprisingly emotionally impactful
Came for a cutesy/maybe slightly trashy vampire romance, stayed for the poignant exploration of marginalized identities and genuinely touching story
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