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How It Feels to Float
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- Length: 9 hrs and 34 mins
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Publisher's summary
A Kirkus Reviews Best Book of the Year
A Chicago Public Library Best of the Best of the Year
"Profoundly moving . . . Will take your breath away."—Kathleen Glasgow, author of Girl in Pieces
A stunningly gorgeous and deeply hopeful portrayal of living with mental illness and grief, from an exceptional new voice.
Biz knows how to float. She has her people, her posse, her mom and the twins. She has Grace. And she has her dad, who tells her about the little kid she was, and who shouldn't be here but is. So Biz doesn't tell anyone anything. Not about her dark, runaway thoughts, not about kissing Grace or noticing Jasper, the new boy. And she doesn't tell anyone about her dad. Because her dad died when she was seven. And Biz knows how to float, right there on the surface—normal okay regular fine.
But after what happens on the beach—first in the ocean, and then in the sand—the tethers that hold Biz steady come undone. Dad disappears and, with him, all comfort. It might be easier, better, sweeter to float all the way away? Or maybe stay a little longer, find her father, bring him back to her. Or maybe—maybe maybe maybe—there's a third way Biz just can't see yet.
Debut author Helena Fox tells a story about love and grief, about inter-generational mental illness, and how living with it is both a bridge to someone loved and lost and, also, a chasm. She explores the hard and beautiful places loss can take us, and honors those who hold us tightly when the current wants to tug us out to sea.
"Give this to all [your] friends immediately."—Cosmopolitan.com
"I haven't been so dazzled by a YA in ages."—Jandy Nelson, author of I'll Give You the Sun (via SLJ)
"Mesmerizing and timely."—Bustle
"Nothing short of exquisite."—PopSugar
"Immensely satisfying"—Girls' Life
* "Lyrical and profoundly affecting."—Kirkus (starred review)
* "Masterful...Just beautiful."—Booklist (starred review)
* "Intimate...Unexpected."—PW (starred review)
* "Fox writes with superb understanding and tenderness."—BCCB (starred review)
* "Frank [and] beautifully crafted."—BookPage (starred review)
"Deeply moving...A story of hope."—Common Sense Media
"This book will explode you into atoms."—Margo Lanagan, author of Tender Morsels
"Helena Fox's novel delivers. Read it."—Cath Crowley, author of Words in Deep Blue
"This is not a book; it is a work of art."—Kerry Kletter, author of The First Time She Drowned
"Perfect...Readers will be deeply moved."—Books+Publishing
Critic reviews
“I haven’t been so dazzled by a YA in ages. . . . Biz’s voice is wild and rollicking, lyrical and hilarious, utterly authentic . . . There isn’t a false note.”—Jandy Nelson, author of I’ll Give You the Sun (via School Library Journal)
"[How It Feels to Float] explores intergenerational mental illness in a way that is nothing short of exquisite."—PopSugar
"A profoundly moving story about grief, loss, and love that will take your breath away. Helena Fox is a writer to be reckoned with."—Kathleen Glasgow, author of Girl in Pieces
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Clare and Henry have known each other since Clare was six and Henry was 36. They were married when Clare was 23 and Henry was 31. Impossible but true, because Henry is one of the first people diagnosed with Chrono-Displacement Disorder: periodically his genetic clock resets and he finds himself misplaced in time, pulled to moments of emotional gravity from his life, past and future. His disappearances are spontaneous, his experiences unpredictable, alternately harrowing and amusing.
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One of my favorite books
- By Joey on 01-13-08
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She's Too Pretty to Burn
- By: Wendy Heard
- Narrated by: Frankie Corzo, Bailey Carr, Stephen Dexter
- Length: 8 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
The summer is winding down in San Diego. Veronica is bored, caustically charismatic, and uninspired in her photography. Nico is insatiable, subversive, and obsessed with chaotic performance art. They’re artists first, best friends second. But that was before Mick. Delicate, lonely, magnetic Mick: the perfect subject and Veronica’s dream girl. The days are long and hot - full of adventure - and soon they are falling in love. Falling so hard, they never imagine what comes next. One fire. Two murders. Three drowning bodies. One suspect...one stalker.
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Amazingly romantic and haunting!!!
- By Kindle Customer on 07-01-21
By: Wendy Heard
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Just Fly Away
- By: Andrew McCarthy
- Narrated by: Suzy Jackson
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
A debut novel about one girl's discovery of family secrets, first love, the limits of forgiveness, and finding one's way in the world, written with wisdom and sympathy by the best-selling memoirist, actor, and director. When 15-year-old Lucy Willows discovers that her father has a child from a brief affair, an eight-year-old boy named Thomas who lives in her own suburban New Jersey town, she begins to question everything she thinks she knows about her family and her life.
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none
- By Rick on 04-06-17
By: Andrew McCarthy
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Driftwood
- A Novel
- By: Elizabeth Dutton
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Dutton
- Length: 6 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Los Angeles, California: Clem Jasper is a trust fund kid with a world famous rock musician for a father. When he dies suddenly (playing ping pong) she discovers he's left her a strange legacy: a series of letters that take her on a mysterious road trip around California. Ignoring her aunt's suggestion that she pitch the trip as a reality show, she embarks on her own to discover just what it was that her father meant her to find. What secret could be so powerful that he had to die before telling her?
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I cried with this one,
- By Angela on 08-16-23
By: Elizabeth Dutton
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The Night She Disappeared
- A Novel
- By: Lisa Jewell
- Narrated by: Joanne Froggatt
- Length: 11 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
On a beautiful summer night in a charming English suburb, a young woman and her boyfriend disappear after partying at the massive country estate of a new college friend. One year later, a writer moves into a cottage on the edge of the woods that border the same estate. Known locally as the Dark Place, the dense forest is the writer’s favorite place for long walks and it’s on one such walk that she stumbles upon a mysterious note that simply reads, “DIG HERE.”
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Oh my… gave me chills
- By Kelly on 09-10-21
By: Lisa Jewell
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Growing Things and Other Stories
- By: Paul Tremblay
- Narrated by: Sean Crisden, Graham Halstead, Cassandra Campbell, and others
- Length: 11 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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A chilling collection of psychological suspense and literary horror from the multiple award-winning author of the national best seller The Cabin at the End of the World and A Head Full of Ghosts. A masterful anthology featuring 19 pieces of short fiction, Growing Things and Other Stories is an exciting glimpse into Paul Tremblay’s fantastically fertile imagination.
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Paul Tremblay is totally nuts.
- By Gary & Jay on 07-07-19
By: Paul Tremblay
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One Last Child
- Tallman's Valley Detectives, Book 1
- By: Anni Taylor
- Narrated by: Caroline Lee
- Length: 15 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It was summer in the mountains when five small children vanished from their nursery school picnic. The heat was stifling that day, the tinkle of an ice-cream van in the air.... Three-and-a-half years later, in the dead of winter, the children are returned to their families...one by one. All except for Ivy - the granddaughter of Homicide Detective Kate Wakeland. The other four children say Ivy is dead.
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Amazing book and amazing narration!
- By Jeffrey Yauch on 08-12-20
By: Anni Taylor
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The Girls in the Garden
- A Novel
- By: Lisa Jewell
- Narrated by: Colleen Prendergast
- Length: 9 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Imagine that you live on a picturesque communal garden square, an oasis in urban London where your children run free, in and out of other people's houses. You've known your neighbors for years and you trust them. Implicitly. You think your children are safe. But are they really? On a midsummer night, as a festive neighborhood party is taking place, preteen Pip discovers her 13-year-old sister Grace lying unconscious and bloody in a hidden corner of a lush rose garden. What really happened to her?
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Delightful
- By Julie on 11-03-17
By: Lisa Jewell
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We Are All Made of Stars
- A Novel
- By: Rowan Coleman
- Narrated by: Ben Allen, Avita Jay
- Length: 11 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
We Are All Made of Stars is an unforgettable story about second chances, the power of words, and the resilience of the heart.
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An All-Around 5 Stars!!
- By Trosado on 02-28-20
By: Rowan Coleman
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Sweet Sorrow
- The Long-Awaited New Novel from the Best-Selling Author of One Day
- By: David Nicholls
- Narrated by: Rory Kinnear
- Length: 12 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
From the best-selling author of One Day comes a bittersweet and brilliantly funny coming-of-age tale about the heart-stopping thrill of first love - and how just one summer can forever change a life.
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A delight in every way!
- By Jennifer on 04-24-22
By: David Nicholls
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Falling Together
- A Novel
- By: Marisa de los Santos
- Narrated by: Julia Gibson
- Length: 14 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It’s been six years since Pen Calloway watched her best friends walk out of her life. And through the birth of her daughter, the death of her father, and the vicissitudes of single motherhood, she has never stopped missing them. Pen, Cat, and Will met on their first day of college and formed what seemed like a magical and lifelong bond, only to see their friendship break apart amid the realities of adulthood. When, after years of silence, Cat - the bewitching, charismatic center of their group - e-mails Pen and Will with an urgent request to meet at their college reunion, they can’t refuse.
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Narrator's breathy voice a turn off
- By Amy on 10-16-11
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The Perfect Lie
- By: Emily Barr
- Narrated by: Jilly Bond, Penelope Rawlins, Julia Franklin
- Length: 11 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
For Lucy Riddick, Venice has always been the dream destination, the ideal place to lose herself. And now she needs to do just that. The secret she's been keeping has finally caught up with her and Lucy needs to disappear - fast. But what if, when she sets foot in Venice, Lucy finds the one thing she has been running from?
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Fun and Absorbing
- By Jen Griffin on 10-15-15
By: Emily Barr
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I Know You
- By: Annabel Kantaria
- Narrated by: Nan McNamara
- Length: 9 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
A recent transplant from sunny California, life in the London suburbs is not what Taylor Watson expected. Far from the West End shops and city lights she imagined, she finds herself pregnant and lonely, with a husband frequently away on business and only social media to keep her company. It’s only after Taylor joins a book club and a walking group, that she finally starts to make some real-life friends. Before long, Taylor’s hanging out with Anna, Sarah, Simon, and Caroline, but, as her pregnancy progresses and her friendships blossom, a sense of unease develops.
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slightly suspenceful
- By Karen T on 03-16-22
By: Annabel Kantaria
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Make or Break
- By: Catherine Bennetto
- Narrated by: Anna Acton
- Length: 11 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Jess, a 29-year-old Londoner with a Kate Beckett fringe and a tendency for dramatics, gets taken on a surprise trip by her long-term boyfriend, Pete, to attend her best friend’s last-minute wedding in South Africa. Jess imagines sun, sand, wine and safaris. And returning to London with an ethically mined diamond on her left hand... But this holiday isn’t set to be quite the fairy tale Jess has planned. Suddenly she finds her world tilting on its axis, and things are only set to get worse when Jess returns home....
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Excruciating. Save yourself.
- By Kristyn Rose on 05-11-19
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Charlotte Davis is in pieces. At 17 she's already lost more than most people do in a lifetime. But she's learned how to forget. The broken glass washes away the sorrow until there is nothing but calm. You don't have to think about your father and the river. Your best friend, who is gone forever. Or your mother, who has nothing left to give you. Every new scar hardens Charlie's heart just a little more, yet it still hurts so much. It hurts enough to not care anymore, which is sometimes what has to happen before you can find your way back from the edge.
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Touching, Sobering, Fascinating
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It hit home (losing a loved one)
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Samantha McAllister looks just like the rest of the popular girls in her junior class. But hidden beneath the straightened hair and expertly applied makeup is a secret that her friends would never understand: Sam has purely obsessional OCD and is consumed by a stream of dark thoughts and worries that she can't turn off. Second-guessing every move, thought, and word makes daily life a struggle, and it doesn't help that her lifelong friends will turn toxic at the first sign of a wrong outfit, wrong lunch, or wrong crush.
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Nothing Special
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The Way I Used to Be
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Performance
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Story
Eden was always good at being good. Starting high school didn’t change who she was. But the night her brother’s best friend rapes her, Eden’s world capsizes. What was once simple, is now complex. What Eden once loved—who she once loved—she now hates. What she thought she knew to be true, is now lies. Nothing makes sense anymore, and she knows she’s supposed to tell someone what happened but she can’t. So she buries it instead. And she buries the way she used to be.
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Tear jerking, jaw breaking, just a whole lot
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Suicide Notes
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Fifteen-year-old Jeff wakes up on New Year’s Day to find himself in the hospital—specifically, in the psychiatric ward. Despite the bandages on his wrists, he’s positive this is all some huge mistake. Jeff is perfectly fine, perfectly normal; not like the other kids in the hospital with him. But over the course of the next forty-five days, Jeff begins to understand why he ended up here—and realizes he has more in common with the other kids than he thought.
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Extremely problematic
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Paperweight
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Seventeen-year-old Stevie is trapped. In her life. And now in an eating-disorder treatment center on the dusty outskirts of the New Mexico desert. Life in the center is regimented and intrusive, a nightmare come true. Nurses and therapists watch Stevie at mealtime, accompany her to the bathroom, and challenge her to eat the foods she's worked so hard to avoid.
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The Fake Southern Accent? Yeeeeesh!
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The Quiet and the Loud
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George’s life is loud. On the water, though, with everything hushed above and below, she is steady, silent. Then her estranged dad says he needs to talk, and George’s past begins to wake up, looping around her ankles, trying to drag her under. But there’s no time to sink. George’s best friend, Tess, is about to become, officially, a teen mom, her friend Laz is in despair about the climate crisis, her gramps would literally misplace his teeth if not for her, and her moms fill the house with fuss and chatter. Before long, heat and smoke join the noise as distant wildfires begin to burn.
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This Is Where It Ends
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10:00 a.m. The principal of Opportunity, Alabama's high school finishes her speech, welcoming the entire student body to a new semester and encouraging them to excel and achieve. 10:02 a.m. The students get up to leave the auditorium for their next class. 10:03. The auditorium doors won't open. 10:05. Someone starts shooting. Told over the span of 54 harrowing minutes from four different perspectives, terror reigns as one student's calculated revenge turns into the ultimate game of survival.
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Valiant Effort in Otherwise Melodramatic Read
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All the Bright Places
- Movie Tie-In Edition
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Story
Theodore Finch is fascinated by death, and he constantly thinks of ways he might die. But each time, something good, no matter how small, stops him. Violet Markey lives for the future, counting the days until graduation, when she can escape her Indiana town and her aching grief in the wake of her sister's recent death. When Finch and Violet meet on the ledge of the bell tower at school, it's unclear who saves whom.
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Best YA Quirky Love Story of 2015
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The Last to Let Go
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Story
How do you let go of something you've never had? Junior year for Brooke Winters is supposed to be about change. She's transferring schools, starting fresh, and making plans for college so she can finally leave her hometown, her family, and her past behind. But all of her dreams are shattered one hot summer afternoon when her mother is arrested for killing Brooke's abusive father. No one really knows what happened that day, if it was premeditated or self-defense, whether it was right or wrong. And now Brooke and her siblings are on their own.
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It's slow
- By Autumn S. on 09-05-18
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The Last Time We Say Goodbye
- By: Cynthia Hand
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The last time Lex was happy, it was before. When she had a family that was whole. A boyfriend she loved. Friends who didn't look at her like she might break down at any moment. Now she's just the girl whose brother killed himself. And it feels like that's all she'll ever be. As Lex starts to put her life back together, she tries to block out what happened the night Tyler died. But there's a secret she hasn't told anyone--a text Tyler sent that could have changed everything.
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Such sweet sorrow
- By Lesaly on 04-26-15
By: Cynthia Hand
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When We Collided
- By: Emery Lord
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
Seventeen-year-old Jonah Daniels has lived in Verona Cove, California, his whole life, and only one thing has ever changed: His father used to be alive, and now he is not. With a mother lost in a deep bout of depression, Jonah and his five siblings struggle to keep up their home and the restaurant their dad left behind. But at the start of summer, a second change rolls in: Vivi Alexander, the new girl in town.
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Wow. This story is a feast
- By Julia Fairchild on 04-24-16
By: Emery Lord
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If He Had Been with Me
- By: Laura Nowlin
- Narrated by: Gina Rogers
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Autumn and Finn used to be inseparable. But then something changed. Or they changed. Now, they do their best to ignore each other. Autumn has her boyfriend, Jamie, and her close-knit group of friends. And Finn has become that boy at school, the one everyone wants to be around. That still doesn't stop the way Autumn feels every time she and Finn cross paths, and the growing, nagging thought that maybe things could have been different. Maybe they should be together. But come August, things will change forever.
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Waste of time.
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What listeners say about How It Feels to Float
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anonymous User
- 08-25-22
Moving, Revealing & Touchingly Beautiful
This is a wonderful story. The main character is such a beautiful complex tapestry of personality, vulnerability and wonder for her world. Her voice is subtle, tender and brave. She is trying to make sense of her life narrative in the midst of a parallel family story being lived and written; in the midst of being a teenage girl; in the midst of ever changing friendship, school and community.
There is revelation, tenderness, heartbreak and learning how to live. Find your people. Find a way to live and treasure life with those who love each other.
Wonderful narration!!! Splendid work.
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- Cat mom
- 09-14-21
Beautifully written
The tenderness and love with which this book addresses issues of grief, mental illness, suicidal ideation, and sexuality is absolutely beautiful!
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- Maria
- 11-10-23
Beautifully written
I love the representation of mental health and sexuality. It is honestly a sad yet beautiful story told of grief and loss.
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- Melanie
- 12-18-23
Fantastic!
I really loved this book and how powerful it speaks to mental health issues. The story is unpredictable and put together in a way that makes a lot of sense. I think everyone should read this!
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- P. Grider
- 02-20-23
Not my favorite
I listened to this book based off a recommendation not knowing anything whatsoever about it. I didn’t care for the rhythm of the book. It was as if a teenager wrote it for other teenagers.
My boyfriend had schizophrenia so I thought it would be a good read but I didn’t care for it.
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-09-23
Good but Confusing
I did my best to follow along, trying to understand what was going on and I did for a majority but there was so much towards the end it got so so confused what was going on cause there was no describing but just thoughts, tons of random thoughts. I get its the point but I wish I also was able to have some understanding so it would hit deeper. Also the narrator was fine, but it was super annoying when she got SO LOUD I had to turn the volume down.
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- Andrea
- 12-29-21
Not the Best
Struggled to finish. Didn't like the narrator. Very Repetitive and the story moves slow.
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- Scott Swanson
- 10-05-22
Intense Story
I have to admit I found this story a struggle to listen to at times. I felt the main character's disconnect with reality to be distracting, but obviously this was the point.
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- marshall p
- 09-28-23
Beautifully written and very relatable
As someone who has struggled with mental illness for most of my life, this was honestly a tough read, but SO worth it. I loved the author's writing style, and the narrator did a wonderful job! Both the narrator and the author kept me engaged and wanting more. I fell in love with the characters throughout this book... I would definitely recommend it! 10/10
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- V
- 07-13-24
Perfect!
I Loved it! Wonderfully written and performed! The acknowledgment at the end was amazing. I am obsessed with this book!
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