Preview
  • February the Fifth: The First Hilarious Glothic Tale

  • The Glothic Tales, Book 1
  • By: Derek Haines
  • Narrated by: Persephone Rose
  • Length: 7 hrs and 20 mins
  • 3.9 out of 5 stars (16 ratings)

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February the Fifth: The First Hilarious Glothic Tale

By: Derek Haines
Narrated by: Persephone Rose
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Publisher's summary

Welcome to Gloth

After the sudden and mysterious death of his father, a young fool becomes the ruler of 12 whole sun systems and quickly discovers he has some very nasty enemies. Particularly the ones who, quite quickly, start shooting at him.

In a remarkable turn of events, a young man with a lot definitely not going for him manages to come to terms with a startling reality. He has to grow up. Being handicapped by having rather nasty acne and an odd eye impediment, he also has to suffer the fact that his name is February. Or, at best, Feb to his very limited number of friends.

While not at all wishing to rush into this startling new reality, circumstances and a few elbow nudges from his very protective elder sister ensure that his "not at all wishing" turns out to be a complete waste of time. Thrust totally and unwillingly into a position of authority by early afternoon, February finds himself with a new appendage tacked on to the end his name.

The Fifth. The new and very authoritative part of his name. February the Fifth and Supreme Potentate of the 12 Sun Systems of Gloth.

Of course, as is the case in all such rapid and thrusting types of promotion to positions of power, there will be those who are not happy about it. In February’s case, however, he finds that in fact these those amount to just about everyone apart from his three sisters.

Undaunted by this reality, Feb accepts his new responsibility and by early evening sets about getting himself into a real tangle. His only true achievement being that he discovers that quite a few of these those who weren’t so happy are in fact really very upset about the whole Fifth appendage deal. By bedtime, he thinks he is in trouble.

Before lunchtime the next day, he is sure.

Listen to February the Fifth, a laugh a minute romp around the galaxy.

©2014 Derek Haines (P)2018 Wordwooze Publishing
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What listeners say about February the Fifth: The First Hilarious Glothic Tale

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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Listener received this title free

The Third Son has to Mature Fast

February The Fifth, is the first book I have read by Derek Haines. It was a pleasent read with s touches of science fiction and comedy throughout. I enjoyed the world's that the author builds and the entities that people them.
Narrator does a nice job with the various characters voices and the entire storyline.
will listen to book 2 next.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Not "hilarious", but worth it

At first, I omitted the "l" and read it as a "gothic" tale. Wasn't too sure what I was in for after I realized my error. However, the tale of February the Fifth, Supreme Potentate of the 12 Sun Systems of Gloth turned out to be a very enjoyable listen. It's not a laugh a minute, but what it is is a good, lighthearted sci-fi story. The plot is actually a typical comedic fantasy plot, with a ruler that isn't ready getting thrust into the job. Feb adapts quickly, and by the end of the book he has made new friends, and has truly found his purpose, Not to give anything away, but the final scene in the Glothic government chambers was really worth the price of admission. Persephone Rose really gives the story that something that draws you in. While some parts seemed a little rushed, and could benefit from a bit more space between sentences, the overall project is well worth your time and money. I already have the second book on my list to get! I received this promo copy at my request via Audiobook Boom, and have voluntarily left this review.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Fun, Funny, and Great Story

This story was way more fun than I originally anticipated.

A fun romp through the sun systems.

Follow February the Fifth as he unravels the mysteries of his family and finds the reason that he must become the Supreme Potentate.

Derek Haines does a fabulous job writing wonderfully quirky characters that while flawed are endearing.

Persephone Rose does a tremendous job of bringing this rag tag group of misfits to life while telling the story.

I would happily recommend this story.


I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

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nice adventure

a very nice adventure story very likeable and well-written I liked it a lot I will not call it hilarious but it was quite funny in some parts the narrator was good and overall it was a great story
I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review

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2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Gloth

Book was interesting and at times funny. Would not call it hilarious. Probably more a young adult book. Narrator was great, especially in spitting out the very uncommon names with no problem.

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

February the Fifth

I found this to be an enjoyable listen. There’s humor, action, corruption, loyalty, but most importantly a young boy becoming a man and fulfilling a role as he was meant to.

Derek Haines has written an interesting story, and there was enough action to keep me from putting it down. The narration by Persephone Rose added to my enjoyment.

I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and I have voluntarily left this review.

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2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Beautifully funny book.

There's nothing I love more than a comedic sci-fi or fantasy story except one that also manages to bring a sense of world building to the table. And February the Fifth manages to do all of those things and then some. The writing is witty and clever with an obvious influence of British humor (a la Adams and Pratchett), but it's also unique. Feb is a great character because he is a little stupid and he is quite awful to look at but that doesn't stop him from taking control of the situation he's thrown into. I would love to listen to the rest of this series.

Persephone Rose was the perfect choice for this book. He manages to capture the characters and the humor perfectly. I hope he gets to do more dry humor type books.

**I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.**

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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Fun Adventure

This book to me on an adventure that was funny, entertaining, and engrossing. The story is fast-paced, adventure filled, and full of one-liners that made me laugh, especially the names.
I received this book for free upon my request. I am voluntarily leaving this review of my own free will.

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Give the Author a sigar!

Very entertaining listen! And yes, Derek Haines hit my funny bone many times. I will be listening to more from Derek. I highly recommend this book. Now for the obligatory: "I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review."

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2 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Very entertaining

A quest that spans worlds and time. A romance. And a bittersweet ending. This book gathers together a group of unlikely characters to help a king on his quest for justice. It’s a bit like listening to the plot of a video game.

This is nothing deep. Just fun adventures without violence or harsh language.

I received this audiobook for free in exchange for a fair review.

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1 person found this helpful