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Every Time I Think About Sex I Get Vexed
- Narrated by: Ryan Haugen
- Length: 2 hrs and 48 mins
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Publisher's summary
Hold on. This wasn't how I envisioned this would be. I mean, in the movies the music is right, the girl is patiently anticipating the love, and the guy is mentally psyching himself up for what is supposed to be the most life-altering, man-producing moment of his life. But that did not happen. Not even close.
The stupid cassette tape was skipping, so Baby Face's "I only think of you" came out as "I only tink on you". Really romantic song, eh? I only fart on you on two occasions...just great.
This magic moment wasn't magical at all. Fine, she was in her element as an older seasoned woman who was body-aware and confident and in control. Me, not so much. I had labored breathing, sweaty palms, and a severe case of hebetude thwarted my cool "mojo", as it were. My first time was a flop of epic proportions.
Oh well, there's a reason it's called the first, not that I was already looking forward to my second, but I knew there was at least a mulligan to come, and it could only get better from here, right?
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-
Girls Coming of Age Story for Generation Y
- By Amazon Customer on 02-07-21
By: Renée Watson, and others
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Something She's Not Telling Us
- A Novel
- By: Darcey Bell
- Narrated by: Vivienne Leheny, Carly Robins, Pete Simonelli, and others
- Length: 9 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Charlotte has everything in life that she ever could have hoped for: a doting, artistic husband, a small-but-thriving flower shop, and her sweet, smart five-year-old daughter, Daisy. Her relationship with her mother might be strained, but the distance between them helps. And her younger brother Rocco may have horrible taste in women, but when he introduces his new girlfriend to Charlotte and her family, they are cautiously optimistic that she could be The One. Daisy seems to love Ruth, and she can’t be any worse than the klepto Rocco brought home the last time.
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Should be "Something Almost Happened"
- By Kimberly Wasilewski on 05-03-20
By: Darcey Bell