Contains books one and two of the Attempted Vampirism series: Attempted Vampirism and Attempted Adventuring.

A few minutes ago, Meghan Moretti's biggest concern was getting the kids' athletic clothes washed in time for practice this evening. Now, it seems that Earth has been forced into participating in some high-stakes intergalactic reality television. All electrical wiring has been slagged, and most combustibles neutralized. Some kind of evil space rodents are appearing on the front lawn, too.

Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.

Timothy Walter Bolton - better known as Timmy - has spent most of his life as a necromancer. When he isn't terrorising his enemies, he's plotting inside his castle, which is built on top of lightless chasms filled with nameless horrors and beings of a generally malevolent and megalomaniacal nature. But after one of his latest creations, a zombie hydra-dragon-bear, tries to eat him, he decides that maybe it's time to find a new, less dangerous, career.

A plucky farm boy will find more than he's bargained for on his quest to awaken the sleeping princess in her cursed tower. First there's the Dark Lord, who wishes for the boy's untimely death...and also very fine cheese. Then there's a bard without a song in her heart but with a very adorable and fuzzy tail, an assassin who fears not the night but is terrified of chickens, and a mighty fighter more frightened of her sword than of her chain-mail bikini. This journey will lead to sinister umlauts, a trash-talking goat, and the Dread Necromancer Steve....

Landover was a genuine magic kingdom, with fairy folk and wizardry, just as the advertisement has promised. But after he purchased it, Ben Holiday learned that there were a few details the ad had failed to mention. The kingdom was in ruin. The Barons refused to recognize a king, and the peasants were without hope. A dragon was laying waste the countryside, while an evil witch plotted to destroy everything.

Only one thing matters to Kai: getting the job done, and doing it better than anyone else. But when a beautiful thief crashes his security gig, claiming she's trying to protect the valuable artifact he's guarding, all his careful plans go up in flames. He doesn't believe a word she says - until the item is stolen right out from under them.

Captain Hammond Roystan is a simple cargo runner who has stumbled across the find of a lifetime: the Hassim, a disabled exploration ship - and its valuable record of unexplored worlds. His junior engineer, Josune Arriola, said her last assignment was in the uncharted rim. A renowned body-modification artist, Nika Rik Terri has run afoul of clients who will not take no for an answer, and she is dragging along a rookie modder. Together this mismatched crew will end up on one ship, hurtling through the lawless reaches of deep space with Roystan at the helm.

Multiverse travel is finally possible, but there’s just one catch: No one can visit a world where their counterpart is still alive. Enter Cara, whose parallel selves happen to be exceptionally good at dying—from disease, turf wars, or vendettas they couldn’t outrun. Cara’s life has been cut short on 372 worlds in total. On this dystopian Earth, however, Cara has survived. Identified as an outlier and therefore a perfect candidate for multiverse travel, Cara is plucked from the dirt of the wastelands.

The Earth is changing. The alien invasion brought social upheaval, advanced technology, and an armada of peacekeeping robots. But Alan, a college student pursuing a now-useless degree, cares little about all of this. He has only one thing on his mind: the Game. A fully immersive virtual reality, the Game appears to be a major part of the invading civilization. Alan can't wait to play, recklessly diving into the digital universe. Soon though, Alan realizes the Game is anything but simple, and the stakes are higher than he ever imagined.

Keiko "Kei" Springs is a Rider, a specialized form of delivery girl and mercenary all in one. They are among the most highly prized criminals in the dystopian neon city of New Los Angeles. Kei has been running from her past for years and has literally erased it from her mind using a popular street drug called lethe. Unfortunately, you can't outrun your past forever, even on her specialized Nina cybercycle.

Deep in the Afghan mountains, Sergeant Michael Pitcher discovers an object with powers that defy explanation. After interacting with it, he suffers a traumatic seizure and is flown home for evaluation. Cleared by the doctors, Michael goes home to his relieved wife, Josie. But he’s a changed man. The once-loving husband is now coldly withdrawn. When a team of scientists connected to Sergeant Pitcher vanishes without a trace, CIA agent Dean Ninemeyer comes to him for insight - only to find that the recovering soldier has also disappeared.

Timid, socially awkward, and plagued by self-esteem issues, Fred has never been the adventurous sort. One fateful night - different from the night he died, which was more inconvenient than fateful - Fred reconnects with an old friend at his high school reunion. This rekindled relationship sets off a chain of events thrusting him right into the chaos of the parahuman world.

Max Tyco is a truck driver on the road more days than he's home. Events are about to transpire that will lead this everyday Joe on an adventure of a lifetime. Things like traveling through space, starships, alien monsters, and blasters have all been daydreams...until now. The Rowki is a fraternity of intergalactic guardians tasked with keeping the balance between the light and the darkness. A call for help from the oldest galaxy in the universe and the central planet in that galaxy will uncover an ancient secret that could mean the end of the universe as we know it.

Deep within the Congo, a team of scientists prepares for the greatest event in the history of humanity, making first contact with an intelligent extraterrestrial species. Only the jungle is no place for doubts. Could first contact be our last?

Are you being attacked by a pissed-off unicorn? Has an angry basilisk slithered into your camp? Is a dragon about to eat you? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this book is for you. Our world is full of monsters. Some of them are happy to live and let live, but the majority of them are vicious jerks. If you want to survive, then you need to know what to do when things go wrong. Don't settle for speculation or the ramblings of a tavern drunk. Get the facts about monsters straight from a legendary hero who has fought just about all of them.

Contains books one and two of the Attempted Vampirism series: Attempted Vampirism and Attempted Adventuring.

Timothy Walter Bolton - better known as Timmy - has spent most of his life as a necromancer. When he isn't terrorising his enemies, he's plotting inside his castle, which is built on top of lightless chasms filled with nameless horrors and beings of a generally malevolent and megalomaniacal nature. But after one of his latest creations, a zombie hydra-dragon-bear, tries to eat him, he decides that maybe it's time to find a new, less dangerous, career.

In October of 2013, Drew Hayes began posting a story to his website. Written over the thirteen days leading up to Halloween, when each chapter ended the next step was chosen by the readers. Sometimes this led to great discoveries and triumphs, other paths led to Dead Ends, though even in those there was much to be gleaned. For ten years, this tradition occurred, until in the year of 2022, the readers chose a finale. This is their story: a tale of deaths and decisions that spanned a decade.

Agent Isaac Steele has problems. He spends all his splibs on drink and drugs. He has some deep-seated and very much unresolved issues with his parents. And his robotic partner at Greatest Britain’s Department of Clarification, Dr Timothy Stephens, is ruled more by his heart than his hard drive. But all these issues take a back seat when Isaac stumbles upon a case involving the most sensitive information in the cosmos - a Never File, inaccessible to all except those with the highest clearance. He is expressly forbidden to involve himself. So naturally he does.

In the distant past, a time of magic and swordplay, there lived Harold, the mightiest lich of all, a master of arcane sciences, and a challenger of gods. After reaching the pinnacle of his power and finding it surprisingly bland, Harold waged a cataclysmic war against the gods, aiming to shatter the very system that confined him.

Brian Duffy, aging soldier of fortune, had been hired in Venice by a strange old man who called himself Aurelianus Ambrosius. He was supposed to go to Vienna and act as bouncer at an inn where the fabulous Herzwesten beer was brewed. That was clear enough. But why was he guided and guarded on the trip by creatures from the ancient legends? Why should he be attacked by ifrits and saved by mythical dwarfs? What was so important about the Herzwesten beer to the Fisher King—whoever he was?

Space travel just isn't what it used to be. With the invention of quantum teleportation, space heroes aren't needed anymore. When one particularly unlucky ex-adventurer masquerades as famous pilot and hate figure Jacques McKeown, he's sucked into an ever-deepening corporate and political intrigue. Between space pirates, adorable deadly creatures, and a missing fortune in royalties, saving the universe was never this difficult!

Jake is working at the neighborhood market under his apartment when the world ends. He expected nuclear war, a computer virus, or even climate change burning everyone to a crisp to bring about the downfall of civilization. But cruel and arbitrary gods from another world? Who would have guessed that? When these cruel gods shuffled Earth like a deck of cards, nothing was in the same place anymore. Monsters, dungeons, and magical items appear scattered across the globe. And suddenly, everyone has access to a new, strange magical card system that gives them magical powers.

Amber is a young videographer who has landed her dream job. She is to produce a web series based on a late-night talk radio show dealing with the unexplained. She is a huge fan of the show, and its host, Jack Owens, who she hopes to help reveal the world’s most cryptic secrets. The first secret she reveals is Jack’s. He doesn’t believe any of this crap. To him, the show is just a cushy job that allows him to support himself and his wife without having to try very hard.