Conflicted Scars Audiobook By Justin Davis, Brian Kilrea - foreword cover art

Conflicted Scars

An Average Player’s Journey to the NHL

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Conflicted Scars

By: Justin Davis, Brian Kilrea - foreword
Narrated by: David Attar
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About this listen

An indispensable guide to parents of hockey hopefuls

At a time of great change in hockey, Justin Davis exposes the dark underbelly of the journey from the minors to the big leagues

Hockey culture: it’s a commonly used phrase inside the game, glorifying sacrifice, toughness, loyalty, and a sense of identity. Justin Davis viewed this culture as something he was lucky enough to experience. After all, he’d won a Memorial Cup after leading the tournament in scoring, and he’d been drafted by the Washington Capitals. “In my mind,” he says, “I was the normal one.” Unfortunately, after stepping outside the game, he began to recognize the racism, sexual abuse and bullying that was so deeply ingrained in the sport. And then, as his own children grew into teenagers, the curtain was pulled back, the memories came rushing forward, and he was horrified: “Why was I naked in a bus bathroom for four hours with seven teammates? What happened to my brain, and why can’t I remember the simplest things? How did I end up living in a basement where the strangers upstairs were clearly engaged in domestic abuse?”

As it navigates the sport’s darkest corridors, Conflicted Scars shares the story of the common Canadian player and offers a guide for parents who need to know how and why a typical teenager with NHL dreams, from a small town, now lives anxiously, introvertedly, and battling emotional detachment.

©2022 Justin Davis (P)2022 ECW Press
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Critic reviews

“[A] very powerful, raw memoir calling into question many aspects of a hockey culture that glorifies sacrifice, toughness, and loyalty.”—Library Journal

“This is a deeply introspective, brutally honest memoir and a stark exposé of a part of hockey that remained hidden for far too long.”—Booklist

“I loved playing in the OHL, the second-best league in the world, and I have loved my life in the NHL. Justin’s book should be on the shelf of every hockey parent. He has some amazing stories … and every former player will vouch for them. Canada loves hockey, and rightly so, but we have to make sure the kids come first. I am glad my friend wrote this book.”—Joe Thornton, 22-year NHL veteran and Hart Memorial and Art Ross Trophy winner

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A Real Hockey Story

This is a fantastic book that offers a peek into the insane world of junior hockey. From the toxic initiation rituals to the power hungry coaches and GMs, this story tells it all in great detail. This book should be required reading for all parents contemplating sending their kid to play junior hockey.

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