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BuyMort: Grand Opening: How I Became the Accidental Warlord of Arizona
- Shopocalypse Saga, Book 1
- Narrated by: Wayne Mitchell
- Length: 16 hrs and 5 mins
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Publisher's summary
Some predicted that the AI singularity would result in robots destroying the world. None of them ever understood that it was the sales algorithms they had to be afraid of.
After the arrival of the multiversal monopoly BuyMort, life got brutal. All systems were through BuyMort. All currency was through BuyMort. All sales were through BuyMort. You could resist, you could compete, but it didn’t really matter because in the end you used BuyMort—or you perished. BuyMort be praised.
But not everyone’s happy with the new system. Some, even, want to see it destroyed.
It’s quick. It’s convenient. And it will help people kill you and your family as readily as it will help them sell you knickknacks for a quick mortie. Because BuyMort doesn’t care about anything except the bottom line.
Enter Tyson Dawes, a no-cares slacker with a traumatic past, two wrinkled bucks in his wallet, and a crap job caretaking a crap campground in the desert sands of Arizona. He had a deal with the world. He didn’t change it, and it didn’t change him. Seemed simple enough. He liked it, anyway.
BuyMort changed all that the moment it let loose a torrent of alien entrepreneurs upon his planet, intent on selling everything that hadn’t been tagged through the system and classified as his private property.
When a man has little, he cherishes it. When that little is lost, he’ll do whatever it takes and change into whatever he needs to be able to get that little bit back.
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By: R. S. Belcher
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Tesser: A Dragon Among Us
- A Reemergence Novel, Book 1
- By: Chris Philbrook
- Narrated by: James Foster
- Length: 12 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Tesser, the dragon of life itself, is one of seven: Earth’s primordial draconic guardians, destined to oversee its development and safety. Species rose and fell, and 10,000 years ago...Tesser disappeared. The golden dragon woke up this morning, buried deep beneath the city of Boston, with no idea how he got there, and no idea how humanity grew so fast and learned so much while he was away. He is lost, a fish out of water. Where is the magic? He’s got a lot of catching up to do if he’s going to find his missing sister and stop an incursion of daemons from beyond the Veil.
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I dont think the author has ever actually communicated with another human being.
- By Konrad on 04-11-16
By: Chris Philbrook
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Inception
- A Near Future Thriller
- By: Jonathan Yanez
- Narrated by: Jay Snyder
- Length: 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
My history is unknown. My present is violent. My future may be more dangerous still. I use my unique skillset in one of the Moon’s many watering holes. Here, miners can spend their hard-earned money to forget that they’re not among the wealthy elite in the paradise colony on Mars. When a known crime boss walks in, events will begin to unfold hinting at a dark past and an even murkier future.
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Hunh?
- By Linda Luella on 11-08-19
By: Jonathan Yanez
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Battle Miner
- By: Kirk Mason
- Narrated by: Melanie Hastings
- Length: 9 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When I got the letter, I couldn't believe it. When I drove down the highway, I still couldn't believe it. And when I got there? I finally realized I had a purpose: breaking rocks with my crazy new roommates.
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Great start
- By Austin Verm on 03-21-23
By: Kirk Mason
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No Quarter
- A Supernatural Action Adventure Opera
- By: Michael Todd, Michael Anderle, Laurie Starky
- Narrated by: Emily Beresford
- Length: 6 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The rules have changed. Now the Damned can go on vacation and even hook up. Without Pandora near him, can Calvin get a little action in Cabo? Unfortunately, the general has a different demand for Katie, and it’s coming from the whole industry. Requested in New York to work with the NYPD, Katie is working a side job or two. Her mercenary skills are useful, and profitable, for other types of hard jobs. And this time, the Damned can help a child. There will be hell to pay when Katie and Pandora come calling, with no quarter for the demons.
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No Quarter
- By Joe Mellia on 06-21-24
By: Michael Todd, and others
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Arcadian Genesis
- By: Greig Beck
- Narrated by: Sean Mangan
- Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Alex Hunter - in the mission that turned him from a normal man into the weapon known as the Arcadian - and the elite team of soldiers known as the Hotzone All-Forces Warfare Commandos must enter a hostile country to rescue a defected Chechen researcher from the centre of a country at war. But the HAWCs are not the only ones looking for the rogue scientist and the mysterious package he carries with him. A brutal and relentless killer and his death squad are on the trail, too - and they bring a savagery with them that Hunter and his team have never witnessed before in modern warfare.
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Not bad, but not great
- By Michael on 02-27-22
By: Greig Beck
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The Wastes of Keldora
- Factory of the Gods, Book 1
- By: Alex Raizman
- Narrated by: Christopher James Mayer
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Summoned to another world where gods and monsters roam, Julian continues his streak of bad luck. Rather than touching the Godcore directly, he let his smartphone absorb it. Now, he's got to figure out how to make the Godcore and his phone work together to help the people who summoned him survive their upcoming annihilation by the mad God of Chains.
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New beginnings. Same people.
- By GrimReaperD13 on 08-14-21
By: Alex Raizman
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Death's Mantle: The Complete Series
- Death's Mantle, Books 1-3
- By: Harmon Cooper
- Narrated by: Andrea Parsneau
- Length: 30 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
With great power comes formidable enemies and heartbreaking revelations. Lucian's quest to save his addict brother from a preordained death propels him into the heart of ancient conflicts, forcing him to forge and test alliances. As the series unfolds, Lucian must leverage his newfound abilities against a backdrop of cosmic war and familial secrets, risking everything to protect those he loves. Faced with loss, betrayal, and the dire consequences of his choices, Lucian's journey is a relentless pursuit of salvation that challenges the boundaries of sacrifice and the power of destiny.
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The Narrator is Phenomenal
- By KTupua on 10-02-24
By: Harmon Cooper
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Space Tripping
- By: Patrick Edwards
- Narrated by: Nick Tecosky
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Chuck never thought too deeply about whether aliens existed - not until Jopp, an intergalactic transport pilot, drunkenly crashed on Earth and tried to steal his truck. Now Chuck finds himself unwittingly roped into helping Jopp work off a debt to the universe's most powerful corporation, the Prime Partners Intergalactic Consortium. Through a series of mishaps and misfortune, the duo find themselves in possession of a mysterious black case. In order to survive, they must fend off murderous marauders, an interplanetary police force, and a peculiar crime boss.
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Excellent Book!
- By Ian Matties on 09-07-17
By: Patrick Edwards
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Gun Runner
- By: Larry Correia, John Brown
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 18 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Once, Jackson Rook was a war hero. Raised from boyhood to pilot an exosuit mech, he’d fought gallantly for the rebellion against the Collectivists. But that was a long time ago, on a world very far away. Now, Jackson Rook is a criminal, a smuggler on board the Multipurpose Supply Vehicle Tar Heel. His latest mission: steal a top-of-the-line mech called the Citadel and deliver it to the far-flung planet Swindle, a world so hostile even the air will kill you. The client: a man known only as the Warlord.
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Agree with Others
- By LivinInKY on 02-04-21
By: Larry Correia, and others
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Histories
- A Quincy Harker, Demon Hunter Short Story Collection (Quincy Harker Collection)
- By: John G. Hartness
- Narrated by: James Anderson Foster
- Length: 4 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
An attack in the dark. The loss of a love. Waking up hung over in a ditch. These are the things that make a hero, especially if that hero is Quincy Harker, immortal wizard, snarky bastard, and general badass. Histories collects two short stories and one short novella giving a peek behind the curtain at the man, the myth, the legend that is Quincy Harker, as well as the origin story of one of his most popular cohorts, Jo Henry.
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Great for newcomers and Harker fans
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 10-11-22
By: John G. Hartness
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First Encounter
- Ascension Wars, Book 1
- By: Jasper T. Scott
- Narrated by: Ben Jaeger-Thomas
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The United Nations of Earth sent out the Forerunner ships to explore and colonize the four most promising star systems within 50 light-years of Earth. Forerunner One left Earth under the command of Captain Clayton Cross, heading for Trappist-1. After a ninety year journey to reach it, the crew encountered not only a habitable world, but alien life already inhabiting it, and dark secrets lurking beneath the surface. The revelation of who these aliens are and what they want proves more terrifying than promising, and Captain Cross is forced to make tough decisions that will affect not only his crew, but the fate of the entire human race.
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Good Story and Concept; Narrator mispronouncing
- By Vance F. on 02-18-20
By: Jasper T. Scott
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Hellboy: Oddest Jobs
- By: Author Various
- Narrated by: Seth Podowitz
- Length: 9 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Longtime contributor to the Hellboy mythos Christopher Golden brings together a crew of luminaries including Joe R. Lansdale and China Miéville, cross-genre sensation Barbara Hambly, celebrated mystery writer Ken Bruen, best-selling science-fiction and fantasy novelist Tad Williams, and a bevy of other skilled storytellers eager to spin a tale or two about the world's greatest paranormal detective. Some of the biggest names in horror, mystery, and fantasy come together to pay homage to Mike Mignola's Hellboy!
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could go with more authors that know Source materi
- By bEnemy on 07-25-23
By: Author Various
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Monster Hunter International
- By: Larry Correia
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 24 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Five days after Owen Zastava Pitt pushed his insufferable boss out of a 14th story window, he woke up in the hospital with a scarred face, an unbelievable memory, and a job offer. It turns out that monsters are real. All the things from myth, legend, and B-movies are out there, waiting in the shadows. Some of them are evil, and some are just hungry. Monster Hunter International is the premier eradication company in the business. And now Owen is their newest recruit.
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Suprizingly entertaining
- By Konstantin on 02-17-12
By: Larry Correia
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Extremely Weak
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Summoners are born, not made. For Bran of Ealdor, this is the one thing stopping him from becoming a member of the legendary warriors known as summoners. They are gods among men who can call monsters into battle to fight alongside them. Mages, Rangers, Beastmasters, Protectors, Hunters, and Lancers. These are the six classes of summoners. None of which Bran can become.
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Love me a great LitRPG series!
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Isaac Thoma lived to see the last handful of survivors defeat the demonic champion. He is now alone, his past in ashes, the last and most powerful human on a blighted Earth. But what if he could go back? Hurled back in time, Isaac has one chance to change it all. A chance to warn humanity of their impending doom. A chance to stop the [System] before shortsightedness and lust for power can render humanity extinct.
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top tier world, no stupid MC
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The Hedge Wizard
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Legends speak of wizards with the power to rival Gods. To Hump, it’s just a story. Apprenticed to a wandering wizard, he grew up on the road, following the coin on whatever quest it took them. He always believed his master was just an ordinary hedge wizard, until the old man suddenly died, and his book of spells bound to Hump’s soul. Knowing no other life, Hump takes up his master’s staff and heads out alone into a world of dungeons and monsters. So begins the path of The Wanderer. The White Flame. The Hedge Wizard.
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I'm so torn on this.
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Overall
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Story
After being betrayed by the very kingdom he saved, Jacob Stone forsook his title of Hero. Now he lives the simple life of a barkeep. Yet even that life is irrevocably erased when a young woman named Enyo appears before him. She claims to be the daughter of the former Dark Lord and has come seeking his aid. He’d normally never consider lending her a hand, but when she tells him that she knows of a way for him to return home, he’s left with little recourse.
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Good Iseaki
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Rob didn't think of himself as anyone special, but when a pitch-black portal tried to wrap his best friend in chains, he stepped up without thinking and found himself ensnared instead. His moment of heroism results in being torn away from everyone he knew and loved, kidnapped by an unknown force that leaves him with a note in his pocket stating: "Good luck." After being thrown into the wilderness of Elatra, a hostile fantasy world ruled by levels, stats, progression, and bizarre video game logic, he finds himself entirely out of his depth.
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if blood is your drug then everyone's a juice box
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Ashborn Primordial
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Ekavir is a hardworking lumberjack's son. It isn't his fault crows speak in eldritch voices when he walks through the forest, or that his blood-red eyes leave the village kids shaking in their shoes. He might be the latest incarnation of a dreaded god known as the Primordial, but he never asked for that. He doesn't even know. When knights arrive hunting for the Ender of Realms, Vir loses his idyllic life along with his chance to be anything else. To grow strong enough to survive, he'll have to become the Primordial.
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A Hidden GEM!
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An Unexpected Hero
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Sorry... Really? Thrust? Anyway, Danny Kendrick was a down-on-his luck performer who always struggled to find his place. He certainly never wanted to be a hero. He just hoped to earn a living doing what he loved. That all changes when he pisses off the wrong guy and gets sucked into a fantasy realm straight out of a Renaissance Fair. Getting used to a new world is tough. It's even tougher when you're surrounded by axe-wielding barbarians, super hot elf assassins, strange magic, and a jaded System that doesn't appear interested in being charged with yet another companion.
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Wanted to like it
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The First Law of Cultivation
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Lu Jie woke up in a world filled with scheming sects, arrogant young masters, and the mad chase for the immortal heavens. He wanted none of it, and soon finds himself beaten bloody in a spar he didn't remember and treated as less than worthless. But his plan to escape the sect is interrupted by an old Alchemist's pills that heal him within moments—a magical cure. These medicines ignite the flame of curiosity to learn true magic in him. Lu Jie sets out to study the truths hidden within the world, and soon finds an all new path of cultivation that could take him to the very top.
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Meh. BoC was better
- By O. C. Stevens on 06-26-23
By: KrazeKode
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A Summoner Awakens: Origins: (A Deck Building LitRPG)
- By: Kerberos
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After the collapse of the known world, Rowan Wilder opened his eyes and found himself on the first floor of the Tower. With a flawless memory and a mere eight cards to his name, he must venture out and prepare himself for the coming calamity.
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Saved by Jeff Hays
- By Julie Pickerill on 07-18-23
By: Kerberos
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Melody of Mana
- A Progression Fantasy
- By: Wandering Agent
- Narrated by: Reba Buhr
- Length: 12 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Alana wasn’t always a child of the Kingdom of Bergond. In fact, she hails from an entirely different world. But an accident on Earth left her dead, and she was reincarnated as the daughter of a farmer and his wife in the hamlet of Orsken. Now, she’s learning how to live in a land vastly unlike that which she came from—and how to wield the new powers she possesses. For, even by the rules of her strange new home, Alana is special: a young bard capable of mending wounds, counteracting poisons, and healing the sick, all through the use of mana and her own mind.
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I want more
- By Kindle Customer on 09-10-22
By: Wandering Agent
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System Change: A LitRPG Adventure
- System Universe, Book 1
- By: SunriseCV
- Narrated by: Adam Verner
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Overall
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Performance
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Fight, survive, adapt, and rely only on yourself. That is Derek’s creed and what's got him through the System Integration on Earth. Everything changed when the System came. Cute bunnies and beautiful butterflies became savage killing machines. Then the Invaders arrived with a single goal: to obtain ownership of this new habitable planet. War has raged ever since. None of this mattered much to Derek, aside from making living a little more perilous.
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Reviews lie hard
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What listeners say about BuyMort: Grand Opening: How I Became the Accidental Warlord of Arizona
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Mike and Jen
- 08-25-23
Fantastic - Fun, gritty new twist on system apoc
I really enjoyed this. Reminiscent of Dungeon Crawler Carl in the real feeling way that civilization would react and an MC who for various reasons is uniquely suited (and a bit lucky) to thrive. Basically another universe's Amazon AI goes rogue and is on a mission to spread to new markets and maximize profits at any cost. Everything is for sale in the universal marketplace.
Not a full on LitRPG in that there are no levels and stat points but characters still evolve if they're "smart shoppers". Satisfying antagonists and an MC who has the usual checkered past but who you can get behind. I binged the first two books and am looking forward to the third. Highly recommended if you like the System Apocalypse genre.
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4 people found this helpful
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- J woods
- 08-12-23
I love it!
This book has a unique twist on the apocalypse! I truly enjoyed it and the performance from Wayne Mitchell is top notch! Highly recommend!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Travis
- 05-29-23
It’s worth a read or a listen, depending on if you like narration, by Wayne Mitchell or not.
As far as the main story goes, not bad I think it’s worth a read or a listen, but main character rambles a little bit too much at times, or is a little bit too repetitive with descriptive words in certain places of the story.
The narrator If you like Wayne Mitchell. You’ll like this narration for those who don’t know Wayne Mitchell. He gets very exuberant with how he reads certain characters and if you listen with ear buds, it can be a little hard to get through the sound spikes. Personally, I don’t mind Wayne Mitchell. I think he has gotten better over time but if you really don’t like him, you probably should give the audio version a skip.
Overall, this book was better than most released in the last year, and I couldn’t imagine a better narrator for the main character. No story or narration is perfect so give it a try or don’t it’s up to you.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-19-24
So. Much. Yelling.
The story is entertaining and can be thought provoking but the narrator’s near-constant yelling is frankly distracting. To his credit, the story is action packed and does deserve dramatic effect, but there’s a limit to how much drama can be injected by shouting.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Chris Johnson
- 06-22-24
Whole series is great!
It's an imaginative and well written story. The characters are fun and I'm always on the seat of my pants. Some wild things happen over the course of these books and I love it. It's like science fiction should be. However, I will take a hard pass on the love story between moles, and Jake.
Would love to have a flashback a few chapters of Lee working for the company back in the day would be a lot of fun to read.
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- Gunslinger
- 01-10-24
Excellent listen
I liked this more than i thought i would. the story flows well, kept me interested, and the narration was well done without being neither subdued, nor over the top. I liked it well enough that I'm now listening though the second book. Kudos to both authors and narrator.
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- Jeffrey
- 12-16-23
ok. parts start to wear on you.
yes this is like Carl because it's basically a solo MC with a sprinkling of random assortment of characters.
needs a Skippy or shart. or some kind of companion character. too many things went past funny into annoying.
just a personal preference. not going to be continuing.
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- BBbandura
- 12-27-23
loved the sci Fi corporate apocalypse
it is a creative journey into how aliens could crush us with a Walmart/Amazon corporate take over.. It has a ash vs the evil dead feel too, especially with the narration. What it lacks in well polished story telling and plot it makes up for in its unique takes on glutinous capitalism.
It's a little scary how close to reality it is.
I love the narration and his raspy deep voice. fits the MC very well. he needs to learn how say Prescott properly though. When speaking for female characters, his deep voice misses the mark.
Overall i recommend it if you are just looking for new litrpg/sci Fi experience. You should probably skip this one if your are looking for in depth characters and plot development.
I just bought book 2.
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- Jay Bryant
- 02-03-24
Couldn’t finish
The MC is an absolute tool, idiot and pansy. Literally everyone steps over him. He does ONE none pansy thing to save his life and then he cries about it. He goes on and on about how he used to be the big scary but no he’s nothing. Good lord….I’m glad I got this on sale.
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- C Lee
- 11-13-24
OVERACTING ruined it
without the histrionic performance of the narrator, who incidentally was quite good when he wasn't doing overblown cartoon voices and YELLING, I would have enjoyed this much more.
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