Born for Love
Why Empathy Is Essential - and Endangered
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Narrated by:
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Corey M. Snow
About this listen
From birth, when babies' fingers instinctively cling to those of adults, their bodies and brains seek an intimate connection - a bond made possible by empathy, the remarkable ability to love and to share the feelings of others. In this unforgettable book, award-winning science journalist Maia Szalavitz and renowned child psychiatrist Bruce D. Perry explain how empathy develops, why it is essential both to human happiness and for a functional society, and how it is threatened in a modern world.
©2010 Maia Szalavitz and Bruce D. Perry (P)2015 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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Trauma is a fact of life. Veterans and their families deal with the painful aftermath of combat; one in five Americans has been molested; one in four grew up with alcoholics; one in three couples have engaged in physical violence. Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, one of the world’s foremost experts on trauma, has spent more than three decades working with survivors. In The Body Keeps the Score, he uses recent scientific advances to show how trauma literally reshapes both body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control, and trust.
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Overall Worthwhile, Lingers Too Long in the Why
- By LittleBeadsOfMercury on 04-07-21
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WHY Do They Act That Way?
- A Survival Guide to the Adolescent Brain for You and Your Teen
- By: David Walsh, Nat Bennett
- Narrated by: Kaleo Griffith
- Length: 9 hrs and 2 mins
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Even smart kids do stupid things. It's a simple fact of life. No one makes it through the teenage years unscathed - not the teens and not their parents. But now there's expert help for both generations in this groundbreaking new guide for surviving the drama of adolescence. In WHY Do They Act That Way? nationally renowned, award-winning psychologist Dr. David Walsh explains exactly what happens to the human brain on the path from childhood into adolescence and adulthood.
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LOVE!!
- By Amazon Customer on 05-11-23
By: David Walsh, and others
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The Self Illusion
- Why There Is No "You" Inside Your Head
- By: Bruce Hood
- Narrated by: Bruce Hood
- Length: 10 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The Self Illusion provides a fascinating examination of how the latest science shows that our individual concept of a self is in fact an illusion. Most of us believe that we possess a self - an internal individual who resides inside our bodies, making decisions, authoring actions and possessing free will. The feeling that a single, unified, enduring self inhabits the body is compelling and inescapable. But that sovereignty of the self is increasingly under threat from science as our understanding of the brain advances.
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Disappointing
- By David R Pinsof on 05-10-12
By: Bruce Hood
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Age of Opportunity
- Lessons from the New Science of Adolescence
- By: Laurence Steinberg Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Malcolm Hillgartner
- Length: 8 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Adolescence now lasts longer than ever before. And as world-renowned expert on adolescent psychology Dr. Laurence Steinberg argues, this makes these years the key period in determining individuals’ life outcomes, demanding that we change the way we parent, educate, and understand young people.
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if you think you know, think again
- By Dk on 12-11-14
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Back to Normal
- Why Ordinary Childhood Behavior Is Mistaken for ADHD, Bipolar Disorder, and Autism Spectrum Disorder
- By: Enrico Gnaulati
- Narrated by: Matthew Kugler
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
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A veteran clinical psychologist exposes why doctors, teachers, and parents incorrectly diagnose healthy American children with serious psychiatric conditions. In recent years there has been an alarming rise in the number of American children and youth assigned a mental health diagnosis. Current data from the Centers for Disease Control reveal a 41 percent increase in rates of ADHD diagnoses over the past decade and a forty-fold spike in bipolar disorder diagnoses. Similarly, diagnoses of autism spectrum disorder has increased by 78 percent since 2002.
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surprisingly useful and specific
- By SaturdayDad on 03-07-14
By: Enrico Gnaulati
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The Attachment Effect
- Exploring the Powerful Ways Our Earliest Bond Shapes Our Relationships and Lives
- By: Peter Lovenheim
- Narrated by: Graham Winton
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Attachment theory is having a moment. Recently covered in the New York Times Magazine, New York magazine, and elsewhere, it's also the subject of popular relationship guides. Why is this 60-year-old theory, widely accepted in psychological circles, suddenly in vogue? Because people are discovering how powerfully it sheds light on who we love - and how. Fascinated by the subject, award-winning journalist and author Peter Lovenheim went on a years-long journey to understand it from the inside out.
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Failed to Attach
- By Danielle SeCheverell on 07-21-20
By: Peter Lovenheim
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The Marshmallow Test
- Mastering Self-Control
- By: Walter Mischel
- Narrated by: Alan Alda
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
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Performance
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In The Marshmallow Test, Mischel explains how self-control can be mastered and applied to challenges in everyday life - from weight control to quitting smoking, overcoming heartbreak, making major decisions, and planning for retirement. With profound implications for the choices we make in parenting, education, public policy and self-care, The Marshmallow Test will change the way you think about who we are and what we can be.
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Great performance, but lacking in content
- By Hilary - San Francisco on 09-27-14
By: Walter Mischel
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How to Raise a Boy
- The Power of Connection to Build Good Men
- By: Michael C. Reichert
- Narrated by: Adam Grupper
- Length: 11 hrs and 18 mins
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Michael C. Reichert draws on his 30 years of experience researching the process by which boys become men to provide a road map for parents and educators who hope to help the boys they love and care about grow into strong, emotionally intelligent, and compassionate men.
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Good overall information, but a but lacking how-to
- By Dima on 01-12-21
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The Sibling Effect
- What the Bonds among Brothers and Sisters Reveal about Us
- By: Jeffrey Kluger
- Narrated by: Pete Larkin
- Length: 8 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Nobody affects us as deeply as our brothers and sisters - not parents, not children, not friends. From the time we - and they - are born, our siblings are our collaborators and co-conspirators, our role models and cautionary tales. They teach us how to resolve conflicts and how not to, how to conduct friendships and when to walk away.
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This is the only book I never finished
- By Rob on 06-25-12
By: Jeffrey Kluger
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A User's Guide to the Brain
- Perception, Attention, and the Four Theaters of the Brain
- By: John J. Ratey
- Narrated by: Eric Martin
- Length: 16 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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John Ratey, best-selling author and clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, lucidly explains the human brain's workings, and paves the way for a better understanding of how the brain affects who we are. Ratey provides insight into the basic structure and chemistry of the brain, and demonstrates how its systems shape our perceptions, emotions, and behavior. By giving us a greater understanding of how the brain responds to the guidance of its user, he provides us with knowledge that can enable us to improve our lives.
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Great book, mediocre narration
- By Dr. B on 09-25-18
By: John J. Ratey
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The Bond
- Connecting Through the Space Between Us
- By: Lynne McTaggart
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 10 hrs and 50 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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From the best-selling author of The Intention Experiment and The Field comes a groundbreaking new work---a book that uses the interconnectedness of mind and matter to demonstrate that the key to life is in the relationship between things. We are always connected with others, hardwired at our most elemental level---from the quantum level to the cellular, from personal relationships to business and societal structures.
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Horrible narrator
- By Cotran on 09-19-11
By: Lynne McTaggart
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Great read for understanding
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Loneliness
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John T. Cacioppo's groundbreaking research topples one of the pillars of modern medicine and psychology: the focus on the individual as the unit of inquiry. By employing brain scans, monitoring blood pressure, and analyzing immune function, he demonstrates the overpowering influence of social context - a factor so strong that it can alter DNA replication.
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does offer any way of dealing with lonely
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Doing Psychotherapy
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This book teaches assessment, treatment plans, enhancing the therapeutic relationship, and ethics and boundary issues, all within a general framework of attachment theory and trauma. Practical chapters talk about working with attachment problems, grief, depression, cultural differences, affect tolerance, anxiety, addiction, trauma, skill-building, suicidal ideation, psychosis, and the beginning and end of therapy.
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Good
- By phixeus on 06-02-23
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What listeners say about Born for Love
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Satisfied
- 02-17-22
A good read to do twice in a row
There is so much helpful information. A lot of scientific references were hard to comprehend, but as I got to the end chapters I was really starting to comprehend and tie ideas together. Thank you for teaching my more about empathy and compassion. My major in school is Community Health Administration and the topics of empathy and compassion in a neurological and scientific sense is important.
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- Samuel Shapiro
- 08-15-21
Perfect Mix of Storytelling and Scientific Study
While this book focuses heavily on the empathy developed in childhood and infants, this book does make it clear that it can be developed and improved throughout life. I thought that was an excellent point to be made and providong a sense of hope to readers.
The book also highlights the work of others in studying and developing empathy. It also includes specific policies and practices we can use as individuals and society to foster the growth of empathy.
His statements based on research and personal stories from people he works or spoke to compliment each other perfectly. The audio and reader were also great.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Keith Bj-
- 09-04-17
Must Read
A must read to understand the vital importance of connection for every woman/man and humanity. Our society has become socially impoverished and is growing more so; we must turn this ill trend. This book is convicting, yet hopeful. Read...
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- Sharon P.
- 05-23-21
I'm hopeful
Most of the studies in this book are not recent, but the hope for children is. I found this book after reading Oprah Winfrey's book, "What Happened to you," which includes Dr. Perry. I wish Dr. Perry had narrated this book because I wondered if the inflection and emphasis in some section would have been different. I love learning about the force behind these programs that will slowly alter American society and IMHO make this country shine as a leader in humane growth.
Considering what we know about the pervasiveness and impact of adverse childhood experiences, it seems intuitive that we would focus on treating childhood trauma as our first concern in education. We know what works and that the problems span every part of society, but the focus in education is academic achievement and discipline. Achievement is what we measure as progress and anything that interferes with 'that progress' is a burden to taxpayers that should be excluded or molded for the sake of the good children and good schools. Framing our goal as empathy and our expectations of childhood where trauma as common, changes the paradigm of what we should be measuring schools on. How empathetic our our schools, day care, and psychologists? Why do women need to see a trauma psychologist when experiencing spousal abuse to avoid the focus on saving the marriage as a social solution?
I especially liked the discussion on diet, exercise, and human touch as a basic need with massive therapeutic benefit. The discussion on the influence of oxytocin in the mother child bond is long overdue. We are biological creatures on an unstable landscape and the temptation to address violence with violent discipline is truly in our DNA.
I am afraid that parental inclusion in public education is problematic. My experience is that of educators,including special ed teachers, collaborating with administrators to bully weak parents in schools where soccer moms rules in political armies. I don't think schools can reach these goals through self-governance. Perhaps a check and balance system outside of school influence that oversees empathy and health, with the authority to insure s a child's needs are appropriately addressed, would be more effective than our current system. (Something more accessible that suing the school for special ed resource which is ineffective).
We have missed the boat on diet and exercise , so, I guess progress is slow. I like to study children in history because I am more hopeful progress is evolving.
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- Eric T.
- 08-29-21
Amazing as always
Dr Perry’s books are always amazing and well worth the reading. Anyone in the helping profession should be required to read them.
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- Smiles McCray
- 02-21-19
Insightful Read
This book highlights the importance of empathy and kindness in a way that allows you to reflect on your life and those you grew up with, and who you are today.
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-16-22
As always I am not disappointed
Bruce and Maia have such great insights. The stories they use to relay the research is always fantastic.
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- Mittens u.
- 06-04-18
Empathy is learned in the home
Empathy starts in the home with good enough parenting and sometimes with not so good parenting. Fascinating true stories are told to get a better understanding of what is needed to learn and feel empathy for self and others.
Listening to this book was not always easy but it is well worth the time and discomfort to learn this important information. There are proven ways to improve your life your children's life and the life of others. A must-read!
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- Seeking Health
- 05-05-22
thank you Dr Berry!
This book on empathy and your subsequent book with Oprah have been very helpful to
understanding my early childhood experiences and how they reflect in my adult life. heartfelt thanks . 🙏.
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- Shawn A. Bumgarner
- 08-16-22
Dr Perry is well worth your time!
Just a great book on child development in general and human relationships. I’ll be listening to this one again someday soon I hope.
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