Armageddon: The Musical
Armageddon Trilogy, Book 1
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Narrated by:
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Robert Rankin
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By:
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Robert Rankin
About this listen
From the point of view of 2050, you're history. Theological warfare. Elvis on an epic time-travel journey - the Presliad. Buddhavision - a network bigger than God (and more powerful, too). Nasty nuclear leftovers. Naughty sex habits. Dalai Dan (the 153rd reincarnation of the Lama of that ilk) and Barry, the talkative Time Sprout.
Even with all this excitement, you wouldn't think a backwater planet like Earth makes much of a splash in the galatic pond. But the soap opera called The Earthers is making big video bucks in the intergalactic ratings race. And alien TV execs know exactly what the old earth drama needs to make the off-world audience sit up and stare: a spectacular Armageddon-type finale. With a cast of millions - including you! Don’t touch that dial - it’s gonne be one helluva show…
Robert Rankin describes himself as a teller of tall tales. The Morning Star describes him as 'The Master of Silliness', and his publisher describes him as ‘The Master of Far Fetched Fiction’. He is the author of more than thirty novels, of which he has sold millions of copies, and he makes people laugh around the world.
Robert loves going on tour, signing books for readers, and his appearances at signings and conventions are legendary, often including a stand-up routine, a song (accompanied by his 'air-ukulele'), and an always-entertaining question-and-answer session.
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Editorial reviews
A weird and wonderful romp through the galaxy in the grand tradition of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett. The plot involves multiple worlds and dimensions, a post-apocalyptic Earth, a religious leader named Dalai Lama Dan, Elvis (with a talking sprout embedded in his brain), and plenty of commentary on religion, television, and pop culture. Performed by author Robert Rankin himself in a warm English accent, and stuffed with laugh-out-loud humor. Some might find the plot a bit complex, although plenty of others will enjoy the wackiness and touches of true comic brilliance.
Critic reviews
“He becomes funnier the more you read him” ( Independent)
“Everybody should read at least one Robert Rankin in their life” ( Daily Express)
“One of the rare guys who can always make me laugh” (Terry Pratchett)
“To the top-selling ranks of humorists such as Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, let us welcome Mr Rankin” (Tom Hutchinson, The Times)
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The music of Rush, one of the most successful bands in music history, is filled with fantastic stories, evocative images, thought-provoking futures and pasts. In this anthology, notable, best-selling, and award-winning writers each chose a Rush song as the spark for a new story, drawing inspiration from the visionary trio Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson, and Neil Peart.
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I'm a RUSH fan, but ...no..not this book
- By NBP on 07-15-17
By: John McFetridge - editor, and others
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Altered Carbon
- By: Richard K. Morgan
- Narrated by: Todd McLaren
- Length: 17 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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In the 25th century, humankind has spread throughout the galaxy, monitored by the watchful eye of the U.N. While divisions in race, religion, and class still exist, advances in technology have redefined life itself. Now, assuming one can afford the expensive procedure, a person's consciousness can be stored in a cortical stack at the base of the brain and easily downloaded into a new body (or "sleeve") making death nothing more than a minor blip on a screen.
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Altered Carbon
- By Jake Williams on 09-22-07
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Standing by the Wall
- The Collected Slough House Novellas
- By: Mick Herron
- Narrated by: Gerard Doyle
- Length: 8 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Espionage. Blackmail. Revenge. Cunning. Slapstick. State secrets dating back to the fall of the Berlin Wall. All this and more in a tight package of five novellas by Mick Herron, CWA Gold Dagger-winning author of Slow Horses.
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More Please
- By Katy on 01-27-23
By: Mick Herron
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Phoenix Rising
- A Ministry of Peculiar Occurrences Novel
- By: Pip Ballantine, Tee Morris
- Narrated by: James Langton
- Length: 13 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Evil is most assuredly afoot - and Britain’s fate rests in the hands of an alluring renegade... and a librarian. These are dark days indeed in Victoria’s England. Londoners are vanishing, then reappearing, washing up as corpses on the banks of the Thames, drained of blood and bone. Yet the Ministry of Peculiar Occurrences - the Crown’s clandestine organization whose bailiwick is the strange and unsettling - will not allow its agents to investigate. Fearless and exceedingly lovely Eliza D. Braun, however, with her disturbing fondness for dynamite, refuses to let the matter rest...
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Great Steampunk - worth a listen
- By DarkFish on 05-11-12
By: Pip Ballantine, and others
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The Sheriff of Yrnameer
- A Novel
- By: Michael Rubens
- Narrated by: William Dufris
- Length: 9 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet Cole: hapless space rogue, part-time smuggler, on a path to being full-time dead. His sidekick just stole his girlfriend. The galaxy's most hideous and feared bounty hunter wants to lay eggs in his brain. And the luxury space yacht Cole just hijacked turns out of be filled with interstellar do-gooders, one especially loathsome stowaway, and a cargo of freeze-dried orphans.
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Fun, Light-hearted SF
- By Martin Moore on 08-30-09
By: Michael Rubens
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The Stainless Steel Rat
- Stainless Steel Rat, Book 1
- By: Harry Harrison
- Narrated by: Phil Gigante
- Length: 4 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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DiGriz is caught during one of his crimes and recruited into the Special Corps. Boring, routine desk work during his probationary period results in his discovering that someone is building a battleship, thinly disguised as an industrial vessel. In the peaceful League no one has battleships anymore, so the builder of this one would be unstoppable. DiGriz' hunt for the guilty becomes a personal battle between himself and the beautiful but deadly Angelina, who his planning a coup on one of the feudal worlds.
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A Rat Race Worth Running!!
- By M. Stephenson on 10-28-10
By: Harry Harrison
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Stand on Zanzibar
- By: John Brunner, Bruce Sterling - foreword
- Narrated by: Erik Bergmann
- Length: 21 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Niblock House is a rising executive at General Technics, one of a few all-powerful corporations. His work is leading General Technics to the forefront of global domination, both in the marketplace and politically - it's about to take over a country in Africa. Donald Hogan is his roommate, a seemingly sheepish bookworm. But Hogan is a spy, and he's about to discover a breakthrough in genetic engineering that will change the world...and kill him. Society is squeezed into hive-living madness by god-like mega computers and mass-marketed psychedelic drugs.
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perfect audio experience
- By Darryl on 03-24-14
By: John Brunner, and others
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The Lost Army of Cambyses
- By: Paul Sussman
- Narrated by: Gordon Griffin
- Length: 16 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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In 523 BC, the Persian pharaoh Cambyses dispatched an army across Egypt's western desert to destroy the oracle at Siwa. Legend has it that somewhere in the middle of the Great Dune Sea his army was overwhelmed by a sandstorm and lost forever. Two and a half millennia later, a mutilated corpse is washed up on the banks of the Nile at Luxor, an antiques dealer is savagely murdered in Cairo, and a British archaeologist is found dead at the ancient necropolis of Saqqara.
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Panorama in words
- By ggmomma on 06-03-19
By: Paul Sussman
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Patient Zero
- The Joe Ledger Novels, Book 1
- By: Jonathan Maberry
- Narrated by: Ray Porter
- Length: 14 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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When you have to kill the same terrorist twice in one week there’s either something wrong with your world or something wrong with your skills - and there’s nothing wrong with Joe Ledger’s skills. And that’s both a good and a bad thing. It’s good because he’s a Baltimore detective who has just been secretly recruited by the government to lead a new task force created to deal with the problems that Homeland Security can’t handle....
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Yes! It IS that good. Five stars and more.
- By Kim Venatries on 10-05-12
By: Jonathan Maberry
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Superheroes
- By: Peter S. Beagle, Daryl Gregory, James Patrick Kelly, and others
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman, Joe Barrett, Christina Delaine, and others
- Length: 17 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Modern gods and goddesses, remote, revered - and like the pantheon of heroes and heroines of ancient myth - possessing great power tempered with flaws. Now, find within this anthology great tales by gifted and award-winning authors who move superheroes from the four-color panels of comic books to the fantastic pages of fiction, stories that will remind anyone who ever wanted to wear a cape or don a cowl of the extraordinary powers of the imagination!
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Pretentious tired old concepts
- By BookofJoy on 12-29-14
By: Peter S. Beagle, and others
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Market Forces
- By: Richard K. Morgan
- Narrated by: Simon Vance
- Length: 15 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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What do you buy and sell when the global markets reach saturation point? The markets themselves. Thirty years from now the big players in global capitalism have moved on from commodities. The big money is in conflict investment. The corporations keep a careful watch on the wars of liberation and revolution that burn constantly around the world. They guage who the winners will be and sell them arms, intelligence, and power. In return for a slice of the action when the war is won.
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Good easy listen
- By GGodman on 06-07-05
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Cold City
- Repairman Jack: Early Years Trilogy, Book 1
- By: F. Paul Wilson
- Narrated by: Alexander Cendese
- Length: 11 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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If you've never read a Repairman Jack novel, this is the place to begin. It's 1990. A twenty-one-year-old named Jack has dropped out of college, leaving his old life behind to build a new one in New York City. Manhattan's rough edges are jagged enough to shred any unwary newcomer, but perhaps not one who is determined to stay off the grid, at any cost, in the busiest metropolis on earth. And to do so, he'll have to take jobs of a less than legal nature.
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Fun, as long you don't think too much
- By Andrew Pollack on 01-17-14
By: F. Paul Wilson
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Others
- By: James Herbert
- Narrated by: Kris Dyer
- Length: 17 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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The ugly truth. Nicholas Dismas is a Private Investigator, but like no other that has gone before him. He carries a secret to which not even he has the answer. Dismas is hired to find a missing baby. One that was taken away at birth... Or was it? His investigation takes him to a mysteriously located place called Perfect Rest, a nursing home for the elderly. Here Dismas will discover the dark secret of the Others. And in an astonishing and spectacular finale he will resolve the enigma of his own existence.
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Good book
- By Joy on 06-26-18
By: James Herbert
What listeners say about Armageddon: The Musical
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anthony
- 05-23-23
Some of the best author-read books
Robert Rankin’s books are in some ways, a bit old-school and dated, but in other ways, the subjects and the humor are completely on point for today, and he does a great job of humorously reading his own work.
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-17-16
I Couldn't Finish It
What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?
I don't think this is salvageable in that way. I got to 3:48/10:15 and had to quit. And I have listened to some crap all the way to the end out of my compulsion to completionism.
What could Robert Rankin have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?
I'm American, and while I listen to a decent number of British audiobooks and watch a smattering of British television, the amount of British colloquialisms and slang (as well as their narrated delivery) was off-putting to me with its unfamiliarity. I may be too ignorant of whatever dialect Rankin was using, and possibly a British audience would respond better to it. It was like fingernails on a chalkboard over here.
The plot was... nonsense. Not fun Terry Pratchett-heartwarming-nonsense. Not zany everything's-game-Douglas Adams nonsense. Just ridiculous. It was a running commentary on TV viewing for fun and profit and the decline of humanity. It got old, and I didn't even make it to the end. Of course, this is a bigger issue than the dialect choice. The dialect just turned me off first.
What do you think the narrator could have done better?
He's terrible with the female characters. I'm pretty sure there were two female characters. In the narrator's defense, they were pretty poorly written to begin with... oh, wait...
What character would you cut from Armageddon: The Musical?
They seemed to be cutting themselves efficiently enough... Geez... Elvis. I'd cut Elvis. What the hell was Elvis doing in there in the first place? I will certainly never know--I'm not going back to find out. Also, Elvis was an actual human being. Something about putting a real human into your nonsense alien apocalypse cannibal television story doesn't sit well.
Any additional comments?
Ugh.
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3 people found this helpful