
Allow Me to Retort
A Black Guy's Guide to the Constitution
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed

Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Buy for $19.95
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Elie Mystal
-
By:
-
Elie Mystal
About this listen
MSNBC legal commentator Elie Mystal thinks that Republicans are wrong about the law almost all of the time. Now, instead of talking about this on cable news, Mystal explains why in his first book.
“After reading Allow Me to Retort, I want Elie Mystal to explain everything I don’t understand - quantum astrophysics, the infield fly rule, why people think Bob Dylan is a good singer....” (Michael Harriot, The Root)
Allow Me to Retort is an easily digestible argument about what rights we have, what rights Republicans are trying to take away, and how to stop them. Mystal explains how to protect the rights of women and people of color instead of cowering to the absolutism of gun owners and bigots. He explains the legal way to stop everything from police brutality to political gerrymandering, just by changing a few judges and justices. He strips out all of the fancy jargon conservatives like to hide behind and lays bare the truth of their project to keep America forever tethered to its slaveholding past.
Mystal brings his trademark humor, expertise, and rhetorical flair to explain concepts like substantive due process and the right for the LGBTQ community to buy a cake, and to arm listeners with the knowledge to defend themselves against conservatives who want everybody to live under the yoke of 18th-century White men. The same tactics Mystal uses to defend the idea of a fair and equal society on MSNBC and CNN are in this book, for anybody who wants to deploy them on social media.
You don’t need to be a legal scholar to understand your own rights. You don’t need to accept the “Whites only” theory of equality pushed by conservative judges. You can listen to this book to understand that the Constitution is trash but doesn’t have to be.
©2022 Elie Mystal (P)2022 Audible, Inc.People who viewed this also viewed...
-
Bad Law
- Ten Popular Laws That Are Ruining America
- By: Elie Mystal
- Narrated by: Elie Mystal
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The New York Times bestselling author brings his trademark legal acumen and passionate snark to offer a brilliant takedown of ten shocking pieces of legislation that continue to perpetuate hate, racial bias, injustice, and inequality today—an urgent yet hopeful story for our current political climate
-
-
He has justified anger
- By Elsa Alcala on 05-21-25
By: Elie Mystal
-
Why Does Everything Have to Be About Race?
- 25 Arguments That Won't Go Away
- By: Keith Boykin
- Narrated by: Keith Boykin
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The most toxic racial arguments share one of five traits. They try to erase Black history, prioritize white victimhood, deny Black oppression, promote myths of Black inferiority, or rebrand racism as something else entirely. They’re all designed to distract society from racial justice, but now we have the tools to debunk them.
-
-
Take note and must highlight!
- By Ivri Nicole Crockett on 06-02-25
By: Keith Boykin
-
White Fear
- How the Browning of America Is Making White Folks Lose Their Minds
- By: Roland S. Martin
- Narrated by: Roland S. Martin
- Length: 3 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For two centuries, the deep-seated fear that many White people feel—of losing power, of losing economic standing, of losing a particular “way of life”—has been the driving force behind American politics and culture. And as we approach a future where White people will become a racial minority in the US, something estimated to occur as early as 2043, that fear is only intensifying, festering, and becoming more visible. Are we destined for a violent clash? What can we do to step into our country’s inevitable future, without tearing ourselves apart in the process?
-
-
an interesting and informative lesson
- By Mo Shaabazz on 09-14-22
By: Roland S. Martin
-
The 400-Year Holocaust
- White America’s Legal, Psychopathic, and Sociopathic Black Genocide - and the Revolt Against Critical Race Theory
- By: Dante D. King
- Narrated by: Dante D. King
- Length: 11 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The 400-Year Holocaust: White America’s Legal, Psychopathic, and Sociopathic Black Genocide—and the Revolt Against Critical Race Theory examines and discusses factions of the legal history of anti-Blackness and Whiteness through colonialism and the United States, and its impacts on present-day America
-
-
1619 project (great)! 400 Years ( surgically dissect laws aren’t real to perpetuate the big lie as we still seen this moment.
- By chris jones on 08-03-24
By: Dante D. King
-
Black AF History
- The Un-Whitewashed Story of America
- By: Michael Harriot
- Narrated by: Michael Harriot
- Length: 15 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
America’s backstory is a whitewashed mythology implanted in our collective memory. It should come as no surprise that the dominant narrative of American history is blighted with errors and oversights—after all, history books were written by white men with their perspectives at the forefront. It could even be said that the devaluation and erasure of the Black experience is as American as apple pie. In Black AF History, Michael Harriot presents a more accurate version of American history.
-
-
LOVE It!
- By KMB on 09-29-23
By: Michael Harriot
-
The Grift
- The Downward Spiral of Black Republicans from the Party of Lincoln to the Cult of Trump
- By: Clay Cane
- Narrated by: Clay Cane
- Length: 10 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
After the Civil War, the pillars of Black Republicanism were a balanced critique of both political parties, civil rights for all Americans, reinventing an economy based on exploitation, and, most importantly, building thriving Black communities. How did Black Republicanism devolve from revolutionaries like Frederick Douglass to the puppets in the Trump era?
-
-
the detailed accounting of White hatred and racism and how they used black "Grifters" to aided them maintain total control.
- By joseph carroll on 01-31-24
By: Clay Cane
-
Bad Law
- Ten Popular Laws That Are Ruining America
- By: Elie Mystal
- Narrated by: Elie Mystal
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The New York Times bestselling author brings his trademark legal acumen and passionate snark to offer a brilliant takedown of ten shocking pieces of legislation that continue to perpetuate hate, racial bias, injustice, and inequality today—an urgent yet hopeful story for our current political climate
-
-
He has justified anger
- By Elsa Alcala on 05-21-25
By: Elie Mystal
-
Why Does Everything Have to Be About Race?
- 25 Arguments That Won't Go Away
- By: Keith Boykin
- Narrated by: Keith Boykin
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The most toxic racial arguments share one of five traits. They try to erase Black history, prioritize white victimhood, deny Black oppression, promote myths of Black inferiority, or rebrand racism as something else entirely. They’re all designed to distract society from racial justice, but now we have the tools to debunk them.
-
-
Take note and must highlight!
- By Ivri Nicole Crockett on 06-02-25
By: Keith Boykin
-
White Fear
- How the Browning of America Is Making White Folks Lose Their Minds
- By: Roland S. Martin
- Narrated by: Roland S. Martin
- Length: 3 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For two centuries, the deep-seated fear that many White people feel—of losing power, of losing economic standing, of losing a particular “way of life”—has been the driving force behind American politics and culture. And as we approach a future where White people will become a racial minority in the US, something estimated to occur as early as 2043, that fear is only intensifying, festering, and becoming more visible. Are we destined for a violent clash? What can we do to step into our country’s inevitable future, without tearing ourselves apart in the process?
-
-
an interesting and informative lesson
- By Mo Shaabazz on 09-14-22
By: Roland S. Martin
-
The 400-Year Holocaust
- White America’s Legal, Psychopathic, and Sociopathic Black Genocide - and the Revolt Against Critical Race Theory
- By: Dante D. King
- Narrated by: Dante D. King
- Length: 11 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The 400-Year Holocaust: White America’s Legal, Psychopathic, and Sociopathic Black Genocide—and the Revolt Against Critical Race Theory examines and discusses factions of the legal history of anti-Blackness and Whiteness through colonialism and the United States, and its impacts on present-day America
-
-
1619 project (great)! 400 Years ( surgically dissect laws aren’t real to perpetuate the big lie as we still seen this moment.
- By chris jones on 08-03-24
By: Dante D. King
-
Black AF History
- The Un-Whitewashed Story of America
- By: Michael Harriot
- Narrated by: Michael Harriot
- Length: 15 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
America’s backstory is a whitewashed mythology implanted in our collective memory. It should come as no surprise that the dominant narrative of American history is blighted with errors and oversights—after all, history books were written by white men with their perspectives at the forefront. It could even be said that the devaluation and erasure of the Black experience is as American as apple pie. In Black AF History, Michael Harriot presents a more accurate version of American history.
-
-
LOVE It!
- By KMB on 09-29-23
By: Michael Harriot
-
The Grift
- The Downward Spiral of Black Republicans from the Party of Lincoln to the Cult of Trump
- By: Clay Cane
- Narrated by: Clay Cane
- Length: 10 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
After the Civil War, the pillars of Black Republicanism were a balanced critique of both political parties, civil rights for all Americans, reinventing an economy based on exploitation, and, most importantly, building thriving Black communities. How did Black Republicanism devolve from revolutionaries like Frederick Douglass to the puppets in the Trump era?
-
-
the detailed accounting of White hatred and racism and how they used black "Grifters" to aided them maintain total control.
- By joseph carroll on 01-31-24
By: Clay Cane
-
Minority Rule
- The Right-Wing Attack on the Will of the People - and the Fight to Resist It
- By: Ari Berman
- Narrated by: Gary Tiedemann
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The mob that stormed the Capitol on January 6, 2021, represented an extreme form of the central danger facing American democracy today: a blatant disregard for the will of the majority. Through voter suppression, election subversion, gerrymandering, dark money, the takeover of the courts, and the whitewashing of history, reactionary white conservatives have strategically entrenched power in the face of a massive demographic and political shift.
-
-
SO much great information!
- By CharlieSeymourJr on 05-01-24
By: Ari Berman
-
Surrender, White People!
- Our Unconditional Terms for Peace
- By: D. L. Hughley, Doug Moe
- Narrated by: D. L. Hughley
- Length: 5 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Surrender, white people! After 400 years of white supremacy in America, a reckoning is here. Time to listen up, look history in the face, and surrender unjust privilege. These are the terms of peace - and they are unconditional. Hope you have a sense of humor, because this is going to sting. The legendary activist/comedian and author of the “hilarious yet soul-shaking” (Black Enterprise) best seller How Not to Get Shot returns to address a nation on the edge of civil war.
-
-
This book trivializes racism and is embarrassing
- By Bradley on 08-22-20
By: D. L. Hughley, and others
-
Defining Moments in Black History
- Reading Between the Lies
- By: Dick Gregory
- Narrated by: James Shippy
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
With his trademark acerbic wit, incisive humor, and infectious paranoia, one of our foremost comedians and most politically engaged civil rights activists looks back at 100 key events from the complicated history of Black America. Defining Moments in Black History is an essential, no-holds-bar history lesson that will provoke, enlighten, and entertain.
-
-
How we see the world matters to how we tell storie
- By Adam Shields on 10-03-18
By: Dick Gregory
-
Lady Justice
- Women, the Law, and the Battle to Save America
- By: Dahlia Lithwick
- Narrated by: Dahlia Lithwick
- Length: 10 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Lady Justice, Dahlia Lithwick, one of the nation’s foremost legal commentators, illuminates these many heroes of the Trump years. From Sally Yates and Becca Heller, who fought the Muslim travel ban, to Roberta Kaplan, who sued the neo-Nazis in Charlottesville, to Stacey Abrams, who worked to protect the voting rights of millions of Georgians, Lithwick dramatizes in thrilling detail the women lawyers who worked tirelessly to hold the line against the most chaotic presidency in living memory.
-
-
Beautiful
- By susan c on 09-26-22
By: Dahlia Lithwick
-
The Originalism Trap
- How Extremists Stole the Constitution and How We the People Can Take It Back
- By: Madiba K. Dennie
- Narrated by: Madiba K. Dennie
- Length: 7 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Lawyers don’t often admit this in mixed company, but Madiba Dennie wants to let you in on a secret: There's no one true way to interpret the Constitution. Americans saw just how subjective it can be when the Supreme Court denied basic bodily autonomy to millions of people in its Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization decision, suggesting that our rights and liberties are frozen in a cherry-picked version of history. This is a line of constitutional interpretation called originalism—a framework that says we must be constrained by the meaning of the Constitution's text when it was written.
-
-
A ray of hope in a bleak time
- By Emily S. Lakdawalla on 09-20-24
By: Madiba K. Dennie
-
Erasing History
- By: Jason Stanley
- Narrated by: Dion Graham
- Length: 4 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Combining historical research with an in-depth analysis of our modern political landscape, Erasing History issues a dire warning for America and the world: the worst fascist movements of humanity’s past began in schools; the same place so many of today’s right-wing political parties have trained their most vicious attacks. Yale professor Jason Stanley exposes the true danger of the right’s tactics and traces their inspirations and funding back to some of the most dangerous ideas of human history.
-
-
The bias attitude of the author
- By Elizabeth ohanna on 09-30-24
By: Jason Stanley
-
We Are the Leaders We Have Been Looking For
- By: Eddie S. Glaude Jr.
- Narrated by: Eddie S. Glaude Jr.
- Length: 4 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
One of the nation's preeminent scholars and a New York Times bestselling author, Eddie S. Glaude Jr., makes the case that the hard work of becoming a better person should be a critical feature of Black politics. Through virtuoso interpretations of Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcolm X, and Ella Baker, Glaude shows how we have the power to be the heroes that our democracy so desperately requires.
-
-
Great introduction to WB DuBois
- By Michael Sheffield on 06-03-25
-
The Moment
- Thoughts on the Race Reckoning That Wasn’t and How We All Can Move Forward Now
- By: Bakari Sellers
- Narrated by: Bakari Sellers
- Length: 4 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Author Bakari Sellers expands on the issues he addressed in his New York Times bestseller My Vanishing Country, examining national politics and policies that deeply impact not only Black people in his home state of South Carolina but the lives of millions of African Americans in communities across the nation. Four years later, Sellers has an answer to the question he raised on CNN, offering much-needed prescriptions to help all Black American lives.
-
-
Great lessons on life and Black history
- By Amazon Customer on 05-05-25
By: Bakari Sellers
-
Law School for Everyone: Constitutional Law
- By: Eric Berger, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Eric Berger
- Length: 6 hrs and 28 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Americans wage many of today’s fiercest policy debates and culture wars over constitutional meaning. It’s because constitutional law is so fundamental to our democracy that law schools across the country teach the subject. It's the area of law that determines what federal and state governments are permitted to do, and what rights you have as an individual citizen of the US. Here, you'll get the same accessible, well-rounded introduction to constitutional law as a typical law student - but with the added benefit of noted constitutional scholar Eric Berger's brilliant insights.
-
-
Read with this Neil Gorsuch!
- By Amazon Customer on 02-03-20
By: Eric Berger, and others
-
Tired of Winning
- Donald Trump and the End of the Grand Old Party
- By: Jonathan Karl
- Narrated by: Jonathan Karl
- Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Packed with new reporting, Tired of Winning: Donald Trump and the End of the Grand Old Party tracks Trump’s improbable journey from disgraced and defeated former president to the dominant force, yet again, in the Republican Party. From his exile in Mar-a-Lago, Donald Trump has become more extreme, vengeful, and divorced from reality than he was on January 6, 2021. His meddling damaged the GOP’s electoral prospects and his legal troubles were mounting. Yet he re-emerged as the frontrunner for the 2024 Republican presidential nomination, and the president-elect.
-
-
Compelling and Terrifying
- By Shaz on 11-15-23
By: Jonathan Karl
-
We Are Not Yet Equal
- Understanding Our Racial Divide
- By: Carol Anderson, Tonya Bolden
- Narrated by: Robin Miles
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Carol Anderson's White Rage took the world by storm, landing on the New York Times best seller list and best book of the year lists from New York Times, Washington Post, Boston Globe, and Chicago Review of Books. It launched her as an in-demand commentator on contemporary race issues for national print and television media and garnered her an invitation to speak to the Democratic Congressional Caucus. This compelling young adult adaptation brings her ideas to a new audience.
-
-
Great
- By JD on 07-06-20
By: Carol Anderson, and others
-
White Rage
- The Unspoken Truth of Our Racial Divide
- By: Carol Anderson
- Narrated by: Pamela Gibson
- Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
As Ferguson, Missouri, erupted in August 2014 and media commentators across the ideological spectrum referred to the angry response of African Americans as 'Black rage', historian Carol Anderson wrote a remarkable op-ed in the Washington Post showing that this was, instead, 'white rage at work. With so much attention on the flames,' she wrote, 'everyone had ignored the kindling.'
-
-
Good History, Was Hoping For More Insight
- By Mike on 09-08-16
By: Carol Anderson
Makes You Think Hard
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
A lot of things I didn't know.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Straight no chaser
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
A must listen
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Great Read
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Nailed it!
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
This was the best of all of those
It was raw and brutally honest
I learned a lot
The constitution on steroids!
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
I’m your face
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Brilliant
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Classic
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.