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Acts of Desperation
- Narrated by: Lauren Coe
- Length: 6 hrs and 41 mins
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Publisher's summary
This "blistering anti-romance" (Catherine Lacey) paints a riveting, cathartic story about love addiction and what it does to us.
Wouldn’t I do anything to reverse my loss, the absence of him?
In the first scene of this provocative gut-punch of a novel, our unnamed narrator meets a magnetic writer named Ciaran and falls, against her better judgment, completely in his power. After a brief, all-consuming romance, he abruptly rejects her, sending her into a tailspin of jealous obsession and longing. If he ever comes back to her, she resolves to hang onto him and his love at all costs, even if it destroys her....
Part breathless confession, part lucid critique, Acts of Desperation renders a consciousness split between rebellion and submission, between escaping degradation and eroticizing it, between loving and being lovable. With unsettling, electric precision, Nolan dissects one of life’s most elusive mysteries: Why do we want what we want, and how do we want it?
Combining the intellectual excitement of Rachel Cusk with the emotional rawness of Elena Ferrante, Acts of Desperation interrogates the nature of desire, power, and toxic relationships, challenging us to reckon honestly with our own insatiability.
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“Megan Nolan is a huge literary talent, and her first novel, Acts of Desperation, is a love story like no other. The writing is intense and honest, with a rare access to real life, but it is also reflective and full of insights, and with this combination the novel manages to separate the idea of love and the experience of it, and take the reader to the place where it comes into being.”—KARL OVE KNAUSGAARD
“Megan Nolan writes with piercing vulnerability and precision. Her debut novel, Acts of Desperation is a blistering anti-romance about the seductive destruction of trying to find self-worth in the gaze of another.”—CATHERINE LACEY, author of PEW and THE ANSWERS
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When Rachel Meyer, a 30-something foodie from New York, agrees to move to Mumbai with her Indian-born husband, Dhruv, she knows some culture shock is inevitable. Blessed with a curious mind and an independent spirit, Rachel is determined to learn her way around the hot, noisy, seemingly infinite metropolis she now calls home. But the expat American’s sense of adventure is sorely tested when her mother-in-law, Swati, suddenly arrives from Kolkata - 1,000 miles away - alone, with an even more shocking announcement: She’s left her husband of more than 40 years and moving in with them.
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Try this author again
- By Robin on 11-03-20
By: Leah Franqui
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Who's That Girl?
- By: Mhairi McFarlane
- Narrated by: Cassie Bradley
- Length: 14 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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An achingly funny story from the author of the best-selling You Had Me at Hello. When Edie is caught in a compromising position at her colleagues' wedding, all the blame falls on her - turns out that personal popularity in the office is not that different from your school days. Shamed online and ostracised by everyone she knows, Edie's forced to take an extended sabbatical - ghostwriting an autobiography for hot new acting talent, Elliot Owen. Easy, right? Wrong.
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Very frustrating heroine, disappointing ending
- By Jennie L. Stumm on 09-23-20
By: Mhairi McFarlane
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Kiss
- By: Jill Mansell
- Narrated by: Gabrielle Baker
- Length: 16 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When aspiring musician Izzy is knocked off her motorbike, she doesn't just lose her dignity - she loses both long-term boyfriends, her job, and her beautiful apartment. Gina, who caused the accident, has more important things to worry about: Her husband has just deserted her for his pregnant mistress. Why should she care about Izzy? Yet, somehow, Gina finds herself opening her home to Izzy and her spirited teenage daughter.
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The story went on and on and on…
- By Karen S on 07-30-23
By: Jill Mansell
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The Nine Lives of Rose Napolitano
- A Novel
- By: Donna Freitas
- Narrated by: Kristen Sieh
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Rose Napolitano is fighting with her husband, Luke, about prenatal vitamins. She promised she’d take them, but didn’t. He promised before they got married that he’d never want children, but now he’s changed his mind. Their marriage has come to rest on this one question: Can Rose find it in herself to become a mother? Rose is a successful professor and academic. She's never wanted to have a child. The fight ends, and with it their marriage.
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Amateurish and Frustrating Book
- By Nerd on 06-04-21
By: Donna Freitas
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Blind Bet
- By: Tracey Richardson
- Narrated by: Sophie Daniels
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ellen Turcotte's messy divorce forces her to take a break from her life. She'll go back, after some rest and relaxation. When her best friend suggests a diversion, she's quickly smitten with the allure of cards and the intriguing stranger who never seems to lose a hand. Surely she can play with dangerous temptation, just this once. Courtney Langford's favorite date is with Lady Luck. Ever since she missed a connection and avoided a deadly plane crash, she always comes up aces. Cards, women . . . seduction is just another way to win. Why should the lovely Ellen be any different?
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Good book
- By Sab on 11-10-22
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The Stuff that Never Happened
- A Novel
- By: Maddie Dawson
- Narrated by: Teri Clark Linden
- Length: 11 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Annabelle McKay knows she shouldn’t have any complaints. She’s been in a stable marriage that’s lasted almost three decades and has provided her with two wonderful children and thousands of family dinners around a sturdy oak table. Other wives envy the fact that Grant is not the type of man who would ever cheat on her or leave her for a younger woman. The trouble is Annabelle isn’t sure she wants to be married to Grant anymore. The trouble is she’s still in love with someone else.
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Don’t pass this one up.
- By Lauren on 03-10-20
By: Maddie Dawson
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The Other Side of the Door
- A Novel
- By: Nicci French
- Narrated by: Imogen Church
- Length: 11 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Bonnie Graham arrives at her boyfriend’s apartment in London, she is horrified to discover a dead body in a pool of blood on the floor. But she doesn’t call the police. Bonnie hides the corpse and then carefully wipes away any evidence she was ever there. Bonnie is a music teacher who spent a long, hot summer in London rehearsing with a band to play at a friend’s wedding. It was supposed to be fun, but the band members find the complicated knots of their friendships - some old, some new - unraveling as the days themselves unwind.
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Pass
- By Jessica Tenorio on 04-29-21
By: Nicci French
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EG, Sorry to say it doesn't get any better
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Extraordinary performance ! Love Irish literature
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Should come with a lot of trigger warnings
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A ruthless dissection of American life in the late 1960s, Joan Didion's Play It as It Lays captures the mood of an entire generation, the ennui of contemporary society reflected in spare prose that blisters and haunts the listener. Set in a place beyond good and evil—literally in Hollywood, Las Vegas, and the barren wastes of the Mojave Desert, but figuratively in the landscape of an arid soul—it remains more than three decades after its original publication a profoundly disturbing novel, riveting in its exploration of a woman and a society in crisis.
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Welcome to 1990s Norway. White picket fences run in neat rows, and Christian conservatism runs deep. But as the Artist considers her work, things start stirring themselves up. In a corner of Oslo, a coven of witches begin cooking up some curses. A time-traveling Edvard Munch arrives in town to join a death-metal band, closely pursued by the teenaged subject of his painting Puberty, who has murder on her mind. Meanwhile, out deep in the forest, a group of school girls get very lost and things get very strange. And awful things happen in aspic.
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A Fascinating Voice that edges too close to the Absurd
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Rouge
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For as long as she can remember, Belle has been insidiously obsessed with her skin and skincare videos. When her estranged mother Noelle mysteriously dies, Belle finds herself back in Southern California, dealing with her mother’s considerable debts and grappling with lingering questions about her death. The stakes escalate when a strange woman in red appears at the funeral, offering a tantalizing clue about her mother’s demise, followed by a cryptic video about a transformative spa experience.
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What a fun romp!
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A Very Nice Girl
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Performance
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Anna knows she has talent, but she’s always felt out of place in the world of opera. A first-year student at a prestigious London conservatoire, she lives in a grim series of rented rooms with her friend Laurie, a sharp-tongued waitress and aspiring writer. Her days are devoted to highly competitive auditions and long, straining rehearsals. At night, she sings jazz in an expensive bar, relying on her popularity with the inebriated businessmen to make rent and stay afloat alongside her wealthy peers.
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Plausible.
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What listeners say about Acts of Desperation
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Mia
- 05-07-22
Not what I expected
I was suggested this book based on my listening history. It was a poor suggestion by audible. Probably an interesting story if you’re looking for something about anxious attachment styles
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- Sharlotte
- 06-07-22
Eerily Relatable
I have lived this voice, not in sequence necessarily, but in totality. It is uncanny, intense, and the culmination of the most tragic and desperate vignettes of my long life.
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- A Lynn
- 12-29-21
Gorgeous, tragic
A sad yet rich portrait of what it looks like to be a young adult who is being taken advantage of while battling the world's larger forces — Nolan does an excellent job of taking us into her mind and what the thought patterns of a co-dependent, abusive relationship look like. I thoroughly enjoyed it, but if the subject matter makes you uncomfortable, you probably should look elsewhere.
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- Prescilla
- 07-11-23
Raw
A very raw and honest take on a toxic relationship, it was easy to appreciate.
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- Jessica
- 07-16-22
Raw & Real
I love this book & how relatable and honest the character is. The writing and narration was top tier. I look forward to more from this author
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- Suzanna
- 09-04-23
Pretty Good
This was a decent book, not great but not bad. It was well written but a bit morose. If you like happy endings and likable characters, this is not the book for you. Both of the main characters seemed to have personality disorders, mutually abusive and self-destructive in their own ways.
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- julia
- 11-26-21
very heartbreaking
This book was very very heartbreaking. The name of the narrator was never given, so it remains anonymous. The poor girl did anything to feel "loved" and to feel "validated". She went through so much bs and was still treated horribly by everyone. If you want to feel sad this book is the way to go.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Aharrington03
- 08-19-21
A Work of Art
I found myself saying "wow" out loud, in swooning sort of way, all throughout the story. It read like one long beautiful poem. Her mind felt incredibly familiar, real, and relatable. I went out to buy a bottle of wine after it finished, and cried about how amazing and terrible it all was. I loved it, I hated it, I will never forget it.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Kanissia
- 01-03-23
Real and Raw
This book had my attention and it explores dark themes! An extremely toxic relationship ending.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Dr Sophie Henshaw
- 05-01-21
Wonderful and tortured
This is a wonderful book about the profound exploration of a young woman's sexual and emotional experience with a cold, emotionally abusive and critical but handsome man, Ciaran. It's in the genre of My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell, My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh and Elena Ferrante's Neapolitan Novels. I loved this so much because it has psychological depth and I'm bored by anything else (yes, I'm a psychologist).
There are those who will attempt this book and think it's too self absorbed - so stay away from this if the deep, rich, inner life of women doesn't interest you. Probably most men won't like this. But if you liked the other books I mentioned, you'll love this too, I'm sure.
Now I've just got to find more of equal quality!
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11 people found this helpful