Space Humor

Calling Major Tom is a funny, uplifting tale of friendship and community about a man who has given up on the world...but discovers in the most unlikely way that it might not have given up on him. We all know someone like Thomas. The grumpy next-door neighbour who complains to the residents' committee about the state of your front lawn. The man who tuts when you don't have the correct change at the checkout. The colleague who sends an all-company email when you accidentally use the last drop of milk.

If a hot older man asked to restrain you and pleasure you all night long, would you agree? Judge Emily Jennings is thirty-seven when she realizes her life is going no where on Earth and she needs to make a major change. Hot tattooed men have always been her thing, so she chooses to marry a Zeylan and start over on a new planet. She’s paired with Judge Jared, a Zeylanian Judge, and quickly learns that he likes to control, not just a courtroom, but also in the bedroom. Jared wants to hear Emily beg, but she is a control freak who claims she never does. Will Emily be willing to submit and ...

John Perry was living peacefully on one of humanity's colonies - until he and his wife were offered an opportunity these ex-supersoldiers couldn't resist. To come out of retirement and lead a new frontier world. However, once on the planet, they discover they've been betrayed. For this colony is a pawn in an interstellar game of war and diplomacy. Humanity's Colonial Union has pitched itself against a new, seemingly unstoppable alien alliance dedicated to ending all human colonization.

A real-life astronaut is coming to Edith B. Sugarman Elementary School, and one lucky kid gets to interview him! Not only that, a trip to a space adventurer program is also up for grabs. To win the contest, students must complete a physical fitness challenge and come up with three interesting questions to ask the astronaut. As always, George intends to beat his rival, Louie. But when the competition heats up, George is too distracted to notice how much the prize means to his best friend.

There are two ways to be a hero. One is more violent than the other. And the universe needs a hero, because a mysterious entity known as the Fathom is terrorizing the known universe and seizing control. But they’ve made one mistake: They woke Rico, the universe's greatest killer, from a coma. And he’s decided he might be the good guy this time. But being a hero isn’t easy. Rico has to work with others (not his favorite), and the impossible odds means it’s going to take an insane scheme or two (more to his liking).

A smuggler's nightmare unfolds—an electrifying scramble for survival. Smuggling always carries risks, and the Sea Rover's crew stumbles into the worst scenario: cornered and trapped by the powerful and corrupt authorities. Now, they must race against time to escape certain doom. Can ship pilot Calin Aku rise to the challenge? In this heart-pounding prequel to the Sea Rover Saga Series, the adventure begins in a seedy lunar bar before devolving into a desperate fight for survival in this Take-No-Prisoner drama. The relentless Planetary Patrol Division closes in for the kill, leaving no ...

The Krakau came to Earth in the year 2104. By 2105, humanity had been reduced to shambling, feral monsters. In the Krakau's defense, it was an accident, and a century later, they did come back and try to fix us. Sort of. It's been four months since Marion "Mops" Adamopoulos learned the truth of that accident. Four months since she and her team of hygiene and sanitation specialists stole the EMCS Pufferfish and stopped a bioterrorism attack against the Krakau homeworld. Four months since she set out to find proof of what really happened on Earth all those years ago.

The location: London. The date: Very, very soon. Beset by multiple crises and buried under a growing mountain of debt, the leaders of the G7 have taken the only logical decision. They've sold the planet. When Toby, a penniless student, and his two new flatmates find out one morning on TV, they're surprised to find the Earth's new alien owners are staggeringly cute and bring the promise of a debt-free future. They're just getting ready to celebrate along with the rest of the world, when a chance encounter with a mysterious professor reveals the truth.

NASA’s scientists thought he’d be the PERFECT chimp to send into space. Little did Chump know that he had been selected for a deadly-dangerous mission. If a chimp could orbit Earth, then chances were a human could too. With Chump the chimp at the controls of a spacecraft, what could possibly go wrong? As it turned out, EVERYTHING.

Middle-schooler Greg Heffley charts the rise of his teenage brother's band, Löded Diper, as they live out their rock-and-roll dreams. But things could get messy for Greg and Rodrick when the Diper hits the road.

Jane Kamali is an agent for the Justified. Her mission: to recruit children with miraculous gifts in the hope that they might prevent the Pulse from once again sending countless worlds back to the dark ages. Hot on her trail is the Pax - a collection of fascist zealots who believe they are the rightful rulers of the galaxy and who remain untouched by the Pulse. Now Jane, a handful of comrades from her past, and a telekinetic girl called Esa must fight their way through a galaxy full of dangerous conflicts, remnants of ancient technology, and other hidden dangers.

Random Facts You Should Know: WTF Edition is jam-packed with fun and strange facts that you will be itching to unpack in any conversation to impress those around you. Whether you enjoy listening through these by yourself, with a partner, or with a group, you are bound to lose track of time while having a laugh and learning something new.

Scholastic's best-selling Old Lady returns in this adventure series with a nonfiction twist that will make you laugh and learn! In this spin-off, the Old Lady turns into an Old Astronaut who travels through space, swallowing a moon...along with a star, a planet, a comet, a meteor, a rocket, and a satellite.... Why? Well, it went down just right, that bright satellite!

After two years of searching, Marvin has one last night to find proof of alien life. Instead he gets drunk with his clone Reggie. Marvin is such a failure as an archaeologist and has such a hangover that he can’t even see straight let alone crawl home. Will his parents fire up the spaceship and take off without him? And if they do wait for Marvin, does he have to take his clone back to earth? What are people going to think of Marvin when they find out Reggie is one atmosphere short of an ‘M’ class planet? Suddenly a little green man is pointing a ray gun at him. Marvin no longer gives...

On the eve of Keith Jefferson’s retirement, Aliens invade the Earth with one demand, that they be worshipped. Keith worshipped no one. And having lost his pension and other financial instruments when the banks and other financial institutions exploiting the invasion kept everyone’s assets because they could, Keith vowed revenge and became a one-man resistance movement in a world that complacently accepted the alien leaders as, just some other people they didn’t vote for who now were in charge.

Marcus Aimond, untrained tag-along aboard humanity's first intergalactic exploratory commerce vessel, has a singular mission: sell off-brand misprinted merchandise. When the rookie and his crew encounter the Nerelkor, a frog-like civilization, he is thrust head-first into an alien civil war. The opposing factions, Rejault and Dinasc, are stuck in an ill-fated feud driven by deep-rooted ineptitude.

Earth is rising in the House of Voltar.... And there’ll be hell to pay! That’s right. The invasion is on...and it’s coming soon to a galaxy near you. The action couldn’t be hotter, and the plot couldn’t be more diabolical. Earth is coming to Voltar - and the Voltarians won’t know what hit them. Murder, blackmail, drugs, psychoanalysis, PR firms, sex-crazed teenyboppers, riots in the streets, women in chains. These are the powerful secret weapons of war.

Professor James Lowry didn’t believe in spirits, or witches, or demons. Not until a gentle spring evening when his hat disappeared, and suddenly he couldn’t remember the last four hours of his life. Now, the quiet university town of Atworthy is changing - slightly at first, then faster and more frighteningly each time he tries to remember.

Seventh Dwarfstar, a solar mining vessel, is cruising past a dwarf star when they pick up a capsule floating through space. Aboard the capsule, Sierra has just barely escaped the tyranny of Hatcheta, ruler of Nagiha Space Station, alive. She’s welcomed on board Seventh Dwarfstar by its ragtag crew. She keeps her past a secret from the others until betrayal shatters them. Seventh Dwarfstar is a retelling of Snow White in space.

On the other side of the galaxy, the Cayl Empire has decided to wind down operations and the Stryx are planning to pick up the pieces. Kelly is tapped to host an open house event on Union Station to tempt the aliens into joining up, but does anybody other than the Stryx actually want the merger to take place?