Space Humor

What's so special about Ted? Nobody knows...and certainly not Ted! Ted's back for more in this THIRD installment! Well, Ted didn't really go anywhere, but the let's not forget the fact that he's still trapped on a space ship crewed by over six thousand gorgeous females drawn from his own desires... Ted isn't going anywhere anytime soon. The Council is acting more and more strangely; especially Annalisa, taking on the hot and luscious form of some of the other Councilwomen. She seems to be taking more of an interest in, ahem, collecting Ted's genetic material than performing her normal ...

You think you’re struggling to find your place in the universe? Consider poor old Colin Douglass, a terminally ill insurance agent who awakens from centuries in cryogenic freeze to find Earth is a devastated wasteland. Now, he’s being pursued by a homicidal interstellar tourist board, and calculating insurance dividends is as outdated as making stone axes. Sci-fi-hating technophobe Colin seeks a cure for his illness in this strange new galaxy where toilets talk back, and door handles are a long-forgotten relic.

There are shootings in space, fighting in the streets, and Nadine is being friendly. It's the middle of a revolution but Jose is buying welding equipment, Dashi's diverted him to look for a lost ship, and Nadine has volunteered to help. Strange, but Dashi always knows what he's doing. But with alliances failing and allies fighting each other, what is really going on? Whose side is he on? The good guys? Or the bad?

Contains books one and two of the Metal Fury series: I Am Mech and Mech Planet.

"Utterly absorbing…" — The Prairies Book Review The Race at Valli Ha'i is the sixth book of The Chaos Trilogy and occurs 5,341 years after The Goddess of the Gillani. Five hundred years previously, the known Universe had finally run out of dark matter. As the cost of energy increased exponentially, the prolonged recession quickly deepened into a full-blown centuries-long depression. While it would only be a matter of time before another major dark lode was discovered, it was statistically unlikely to be found in time to save everyone. Unless some wildly improbable sequence of events ...

Leo MacGavin is not the brightest specimen of humanity, but when he inadvertently rescues a flirty alien heiress, he’s promoted from second-rate lounge entertainer to captain of the galaxy’s most sophisticated cruise ship. Before he can flee in terror, a human-hating executive gives Leo an ultimatum: complete the vessel’s maiden voyage or mankind’s last colony will be turned into a sewage dump. To make matters worse, a militant cyborg is undermining his authority, a giant spider is terrifying the passengers, and a sentient plant keeps stealing all the beer.

These are the voyages of the starship, A.S.F. Willful Child. Its ongoing mission: to seek out strange new worlds on which to plant the Terran flag, to subjugate and if necessary obliterate new life life-forms, to boldly blow the...And so we join the not-terribly-bright but exceedingly cock-sure Captain Hadrian Sawback - think James T Kirk crossed with ‘American Dad'

In the beginning ... was Chaos and nothing more. The exiles came. Cast out from Earth by Merlin the Wizard. The wizards, black magicians, sorcerors, warlocks, necromancers, witches, dark elves, rogue warriors...and the beasts - dragons, wyverns, gryphons, chimeras, and unicorns. The scum of the universe, except for us wizards, of course. We were the most powerful, the strongest, the best. And the greatest of these were selected to rule Chaos. Eight mighty Masters of Chaos and one, I Merlor, to rule all as Lord. My ambition on Earth had been to reign supreme, holding the entire planet under ...

Space Bimbos are human too, right? ...and Sam is finding he's their ultimate Alpha Male! Sam's a geek for alien abduction stories. Heck, he's even been seeking them out, hoping to join the ranks. His dreams were never quite like this, though, as he finds himself abducted by a crew of gorgeous Bimbos from Space!. Seems as if this long-lost human civilization doesn't have a clue about real men, and Sam's more than happy to teach them the hot and steamy truth. He'll need courage, wisdom, and all the stamina he can muster to protect his new benefactors from the harsh realities of the universe, ...

I'm Jace O'Malley, back from the outer reaches of civilization. My adventures have only just begun. Dad's paralyzed, and I'm starting at a new school. Yeah, socialization. Fun. But things at school take a drastically terrible turn. Soon, I'm on the run for my life, and make all kinds of discoveries better left in the past. Hopefully I'll survive this mess! Join me on my latest adventure!

In 2488, Battle Quest, an arrow shooting, sword fighting, magic slinging live action RPG, is the most popular sport in the universe. Tal works in a trash dump by day and fights in a street samurai pit by night. He dreams of becoming a Battle Quest pro to pull his sisters and grandmother from the slums. Problem is he’s too short, too broke, and his highlight vid-reel has more fails than an ogre’s got warts.

Being stuck in a traffic jam is already horrible enough. What's even worse is when you have three screaming kids in the backseat. Do you recognize this age-old question coming from the back row of your car: Are we there yet? Ah, this one never gets old. Usually spoken just after you put the key in the ignition. Your children hate to sit still in the car. Boredom takes over before you even leave the driveway.

In the midst of the awkward and bewildering journey through puberty, Jessi's life takes an unexpected turn when her hair starts talking to her – in her head. But it's not just any kind of chitchat; my hair helps me on school tests, gives unwanted advice, and worse, it can do things. Like, really do things. Imagine your locks reaching out to grab your hairbrush or style itself without your consent. That's my bizarre new reality. As I grapple with the changes taking place in my body, I can't help but wonder: Is this hair-raising phenomenon a normal part of growing up? Are other kids going ...

As Dirk and Nora's adventure to the stars continues, Nora inadvertently introduces feminism to a planet with the gender politics (and fashions) of a 1950's B-movie while Dirk struggles to fend off an old flame. With all this going on, will they still be able to hale the advance of the Second Saturnian Empire? Or will they fail, ending this series at book two? Find out inside! (Or, you know, find out when the third book comes out and kind of spoils the suspense by its mere existence. You can probably find out that way, too. But what's the fun in that?)

When Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin stepped onto the lunar surface in July of 1969, they wore spacesuits made by Playtex: 21 layers of fabric, each with a distinct yet interrelated function, custom-sewn for them by seamstresses whose usual work was fashioning bras and girdles. This book is the story of that spacesuit. It is a story of the triumph over the military-industrial complex by the International Latex Corporation, best known by its consumer brand of "Playtex" - a victory of elegant softness over engineered hardness, of adaptation over cybernetics.

Triana Moore, maintenance bot technician on Station Kelly-Kornienko, prefers life in orbit where the air is purified, the commute is short, and nature doesn’t get all over you. But when a minor infraction gets her sent to remedial training dirtside, she doesn’t complain. Who wouldn’t enjoy a few days of sitting in the sunshine, eating gourmet burgers, and drinking too much Jager Hula?

Marcus Aimond, untrained tag-along aboard humanity's first intergalactic exploratory commerce vessel, has a singular mission: sell off-brand misprinted merchandise. When the rookie and his crew encounter the Nerelkor, a frog-like civilization, he is thrust head-first into an alien civil war. The opposing factions, Rejault and Dinasc, are stuck in an ill-fated feud driven by deep-rooted ineptitude.

O que você pretende fazer quando chegar ao Restaurante no Fim do Universo? Devorar o suculento bife de um boi que se oferece como jantar ou apenas se embriagar com a poderosa Dinamite Pangaláctica, assistindo de camarote ao momento em que tudo se acaba numa explosão fatal? A continuação das incríveis aventuras de Arthur Dent e seus quatro amigos através da Galáxia começa a bordo da nave Coração de Ouro, rumo ao restaurante mais próximo. Mal sabem eles que farão uma viagem no tempo, cujo desfecho será simplesmente incrível.

Joining the Space Troopers was my ticket off of the poor planet I grew up on. I believed the recruiter hype about being setup for life financially after my term of enlistment. Yeah, I was an ignorant soul. I didn't know about the tinkering the Space Trooper doctors would do with my brain and body. Nor did I know about the different alien species the United Planets was fighting on multiple fronts across the galaxy. Ignorance was bliss. Sometimes I miss it. My name is JT Jones. I've forgotten about being setup for life after my enlistment. I'm just trying to stay alive.

Quentin Tipper enlisted because he didn’t want to stay a two-bit hustler like his father. Alvin Phish enlisted to impress his fiance’s father, the Admiral. Together, two nobodies become members of the Intergalactic Space Force and become...still nobodies. But when the ISF is attacked by the mysterious Femen, these two nobodies must answer the call to action.