Space Humor

In the beginning ... was Chaos and nothing more. The exiles came. Cast out from Earth by Merlin the Wizard. The wizards, black magicians, sorcerors, warlocks, necromancers, witches, dark elves, rogue warriors...and the beasts - dragons, wyverns, gryphons, chimeras, and unicorns. The scum of the universe, except for us wizards, of course. We were the most powerful, the strongest, the best. And the greatest of these were selected to rule Chaos. Eight mighty Masters of Chaos and one, I Merlor, to rule all as Lord. My ambition on Earth had been to reign supreme, holding the entire planet under ...

Captain Duncan Arugula is being hunted by a sniffing, snarling, snurgling, pointy-toothed monstrosity. He’s locked in the cockpit of his own spaceship, his crew has gone radio silent since the mutiny, and now the monster — whatever it is, let’s just call it a Problem — is closing in. Lemon Tarts in Space! careens through the desperate final days of the space race and crashes into an apocalyptic future, following Captain Arugula on an absurdist cat-and-mouse chase from the deepest tunnels of the moon up to a blistering dogfight across the stars.

Our heroes thought they had saved reality, but now, they’ve learned they don't even know what reality is! Things from reality are fighting back against them, and in order to save their reality, they must first work out what reality is, find the real reality, and stop it, or something—I don't even know! Come on one last insanity-filled trip, and let's just hope nobody dies for very long.

She's a spoiled shopaholic with daddy issues. He's a socially conscious vegetarian who doesn't hide his disdain for people who come from the trappings of wealth. Of course none of that would have mattered if Chloe could have just left her summer fling with Chase behind her, without a glance back - something that will prove impossible when the consequences of that fling rear their head. Particularly one consequence; one with 10 fingers, 10 toes, and the potential to turn Chloe's privileged life upside down.

Indrajit Twang is the 427th epic poet of his people, the only person alive to carry their entire epic history and mythology in his head. His people are dwindling in number, and if he can't find a successor in the great city of Kish, their story will disappear with them. Fix grew up a foundling on the ancient streets of Kish and is making his living as a mercenary. The woman he loves married someone else, and Fix has turned to buying and selling risk on the black market - but is he trying to impress her, or prove something to himself?

Space Station Oberon is on high alert, because a comet is about to whizz past. All the scientists are preparing for the exciting event, and all the kids are planning on watching. All the kids except Hal Junior, who's been given detention. Unfortunately the comet passes a whole lot closer than expected. Fortunately nobody is hurt, but the kids are trapped in one half, the adults in the other. Never mind. They have air and supplies, and they can all sit tight and wait for rescue. Or can they? The scientists discover Space Station Oberon is now falling towards Gyris, faster and faster, and ...

For nearly a century, the Justified have been searching for gifted children to help prevent the return of the pulse. Until recently, they thought they were the only ones. Jane Kamali and her telekinetic protégé, Esa, now 17, barely managed to claim victory against a Cyn - a being of pure energy - hell bent on hunting down the gifted. Now, they face an army. The Cyn and their followers will stop at nothing to find Esa and the others. No one knows what they want, but Jane, Esa, and their allies in the Justified are determined to find out.

Liam is too big for his boots. And his football strip. And his school blazer. But being super-sized height-wise has its advantages: he's the only eleven-year-old to ever ride the G-force defying Cosmic rollercoaster - or be offered the chance to drive a Porsche. Long-legged Liam makes a giant leap for boy-kind by competing with a group of adults for the chance to go into space. Is Liam the best boy for the job? Sometimes being big isn't all about being a grown-up.

That is Fanner Marston’s mantra—his reason for being—and while he knows a little about the first and a lot about the second, he may well be on the verge of learning everything there is to know about the third. Power. He may, in fact, be about to uncover the key to gaining absolute control over the entire universe. The only problem is, Fanner is certifiably insane.... His starship has crash-landed, and he’s the sole survivor, which doesn’t matter to him.

Another alien abduction, this time one of the Intergalactic Marriage Council’s own members goes missing. Julie, a human from Earth, works on Zeylan and needs to find a Zeylan match since she can’t return to earth. The man she’s paired with is sexy, sweet, and fabulous in bed. Everything she would want in a husband. But what will Julie do when she finds out she’s just another abducted woman? Each book in the Zeylan Bride series is stand alone and can be read in any order. If you like it, check out my Otan Bride series as well for more arranged marriage erotica set in the same ...

Join Captain Commander, the intrepid (and slightly clueless) space explorer, as he faces his greatest challenge yet: an invasion of enormous, eight-legged extraterrestrial spiders! From the darkest corners of the universe, these creepy crawlies are hell-bent on conquering the galaxy and spinning their intricate webs of terror.

Finding himself suspended upside down from a burning tree above a pack of ravenous beasts was a bit of a surprise for Sevan. It had been one heck of a week. One minute he'd been struggling to meet his Corporation targets, the next he'd been promoted... And then he'd found himself on a stolen freighter with the Resistance, on their way to find the President of the system. But sometimes, stuff like that just happens... right? When he discovers that the President is really a ball of gas, and the Corporation is trying to destroy the presidential cruiser on which he's trapped, that's when he ...

These are the voyages of the starship, A.S.F. Willful Child. Its ongoing mission: to seek out strange new worlds on which to plant the Terran flag, to subjugate and if necessary obliterate new life life-forms, to boldly blow the...And so we join the not-terribly-bright but exceedingly cock-sure Captain Hadrian Sawback - think James T Kirk crossed with ‘American Dad'

Centuries have passed since evil Emperor Zhan attacked Earth and sent humankind packing in a mass exodus. Now the human race is scattered throughout the galaxy, and United World Space Command is no more. Captain Bartholomew Quasar and the crew of the Effervescent Magnitude have one purpose: to reunite the descendants of Earth's diaspora and save their planet from the monstrous machines Zhan left behind to ensure Earth's ultimate demise.

Connor and Ethan are spending their summer holidays aboard the world's first orbiting city, Starville (basically Beverley Hills in space!). The amazing space station is bursting with celebrities and the mega-rich. But Connor and Ethan are too busy selling ice cream to see the sights.

Meet Sun: He's a star! And not just any star - he's one in a billion. He lights up our solar system and makes life possible. With characteristic humor and charm, Stacy McAnulty channels the voice of Sun in this next celestial "autobiography". Rich with kid-friendly facts, Sun! One in a Billion is an equally charming and irresistible companion to Earth! My First 4.54 Billion Years.

It’s the year 2525, and things aren’t looking great for Planet Earth. An endless night is coming—a super-advanced alien spaceship has stopped the world from turning, threatening the existence of every creature on the planet—and it turns out that ten-year-old Eliza Lemon is the only one who can save them! Will she be able to handle alien overlords, a doughnut-shaped spaceship, monkeys and vampire finches? And, most importantly of all, will she be able to rescue her baby brother, save the world and survive THE FUTURE?

Felix used to be a traveling salesman, drifting through the galaxy and hawking his wares. Used to be, that is, until a freak accident in an out-of-the-way system. One rough landing later, Felix finds himself stranded on a wild, alien planet - front and center - in a deadly role he never auditioned for to entertain a secret audience. The upside? A fellow passenger made it to the escape pod with Felix. With this reptilian stranger at his side, he’s not totally alone. The downside? They don’t share a language.

In "The Search for Microboo," the stakes are higher than ever, when Microboo McBlinkie goes missing in outer space. Her loyal friends of the forest, led by knucklehead T-mo-t McBlinkie, plan a mission to search the galaxy to find her.

Slab Steele’s life is in a rut. Once the hottest craterback prospect coming out of Texas Space University, Slab is staring 30 in the face with nothing to show for it. Worse yet, his craterball career is circling the bottom of the bowl like yesterday’s grilled cheese sandwich. But things are about to change. On the eve of the biggest match of the season, a pair of mysterious strangers draw Slab into their web of weird.