Space Fantasy Comedy

Evangelist Brock T. Hanson believes Colin Douglass to be the prophet he’s been waiting for his whole life, the man who will lead the faithful back to Earth and trigger the most momentous event since Creation itself. But there’s a problem. Actually, there are several. First, Colin Douglass himself doesn’t believe a word of it and is the kind of chap who’d rather stay at home with a nice cup of tea than cross the galaxy on some foolish, idealistic crusade.

Steven Erikson has taken his lifelong passion for Star Trek and transformed it into a smart, inventive, and hugely entertaining spoof on the whole overblown mankind-exploring-space-for-the-good-of-all-species-but-trashing-stuff-with-a-lot-of-high-tech-gadgets-along-the-way adventure. The result is a novel that deftly parodies the genre while also paying fond homage to it.

The Krakau came to Earth in the year 2104. By 2105, humanity had been reduced to shambling, feral monsters. In the Krakau's defense, it was an accident, and a century later, they did come back and try to fix us. Sort of. It's been four months since Marion "Mops" Adamopoulos learned the truth of that accident. Four months since she and her team of hygiene and sanitation specialists stole the EMCS Pufferfish and stopped a bioterrorism attack against the Krakau homeworld. Four months since she set out to find proof of what really happened on Earth all those years ago.

Harnessing planetary forces, Terramancers shape landscapes and avert natural disasters. But not this one. He collects rocks. Out of a job and on the run from his rainbow-haired adversary, the Terramancer is ready to jump to the next system and start again. Again. It’s not his fault he’s made more enemies than friends. Cutthroat pirates, ruthless socialites, and the ancient and powerful Terramantic Order all stand between him and escape. When he finds the most sought-after rock in the universe, it’s one problem he can’t get away from—the rock, it seems, has been waiting for him.

An overconfident pilot with a stolen spaceship must fix an alien device before time runs out. The Newtonians came to Earth 2000 years ago looking for a place to call home. Earth was perfect, except its sun had a fatal flaw that needed to be corrected. Once it was fixed, they were free to abandon their ship and leave it to orbit the planet below. Earthlings commonly refer to it as the moon.

Earth is rising in the House of Voltar.... And there’ll be hell to pay! That’s right. The invasion is on...and it’s coming soon to a galaxy near you. The action couldn’t be hotter, and the plot couldn’t be more diabolical. Earth is coming to Voltar - and the Voltarians won’t know what hit them. Murder, blackmail, drugs, psychoanalysis, PR firms, sex-crazed teenyboppers, riots in the streets, women in chains. These are the powerful secret weapons of war.

Contains books one and two of the Metal Fury series: I Am Mech and Mech Planet.

The story picks up less than a year after the events of High Priest on Union Station, with Kelly coming to the conclusion that EarthCent needs an intelligence service. Of course, EarthCent has no institutional knowledge of what spies do or how they work, so the new agency gets off to a slow start. Then Kelly and the Union Station crew come up with a brilliant idea.

The first carnival to take place on Union Station since humanity joined the galactic community is coming, and the ambassadors of the different species are all entered in the election to become Carnival King or Queen. It's not a job that Kelly wants, and, fortunately for her, the humans get a late start at electioneering.

Bucking family tradition, Dyre is determined to become his planet's first hero, even if it breaks his mother's heart. He sets out on numerous quests to bring justice to the universe. However, his altruism never seems to turn out quite as expected. Who knew doing the right thing was so hard? In between saving those who don't want his help - and the chaos that follows - he rescues a damsel in distress. She doesn't appreciate his heroic abduction, and, even worse, once Dyre gets to know the outspoken human, he entertains thoughts about ravishing her.

The Pan of Hamgee is not a natural knight in shining armor. Yet he has escaped from police custody in K’Barth, switched realities and foiled Lord Vernon’s attempt to kidnap Ruth, the Chosen One, from the Festival Hall. Pretty good, he thinks. However, Ruth thinks otherwise. Being pursued by Lord Vernon is bad enough. Now, thanks to The Pan, she’s on the run. They are both alive, of course, but with Lord Vernon on their tail neither of them can be sure how long for.

Three years have passed, and the children are growing like weeds as Aisha grows into a new career. A mob of alien party animals has settled near Union Station like a plague, but nobody seems willing to see them off. They bring word of a new wave of helpful artificial intelligence, but perhaps there's such a thing as too helpful?

When Darren’s charge-cart gets knocked off the Earth-to-Mars highway and lost in space forever, he thinks his day can’t get any worse. When Kelly sees Darren accidentally short-circuit a talking lamppost, and its camera captures her face as it expires, she thinks her day can’t get any worse. When Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is sent on a top-secret mission into the depths of the Internet and betrayed by her boss, a power-crazed smartphone, she knows this is only the beginning of a day that isn’t going to get any better. Join Darren, Kelly, and Pam in an anarchic comic adventure.

Extra! Extra! Read all about it! The Empire State Building has vanished into thin air! Gone, too, are Grant’s Tomb and Grand Central Station, and all hell is breaking loose in New York City! What’s the story? One grizzled old newspaper reporter known simply as Pop - a role made for Walter Matthau - is on top of it...and better stay there, because his livelihood is on the line. If Pop fails to get to the bottom of the vanishing landmarks, his job will disappear as well - and land in the hands of the newspaper publisher’s son-in-law.

Two years after the events of Alien Night on Union Station, Kelly faces new challenges as the EarthCent Ambassador. The growing acceptance of humans by their alien neighbors plus a measure of her own personal fame (or infamy) is resulting in too much work for an embassy with only two full-time staffers. Friends and family must wonder if the stress is finally getting to Kelly when she starts acting even more peculiar than usual.

The Stryx offer EarthCent help in reaching out to the wide-spread human communities, but as usual, it comes with a catch or two. Kelly see an opportunity to increase her book hoard, just as publishing on Union Station begins to take off and Donna's daughters enter a friendly competition. But who will publish the most expensive book of all?

Over half of Earth's population has left the planet, mainly as contract workers for aliens, and the homeworld is losing relevance to the emigrants. The EarthCent president takes on the task of making sure that humanity isn't permanently stuck in a rut of low-skilled labor. Can the ambassador put aside her new-found obsession with the Galactic Free Press crossword puzzle and help save the day?

That is Fanner Marston’s mantra—his reason for being—and while he knows a little about the first and a lot about the second, he may well be on the verge of learning everything there is to know about the third. Power. He may, in fact, be about to uncover the key to gaining absolute control over the entire universe. The only problem is, Fanner is certifiably insane.... His starship has crash-landed, and he’s the sole survivor, which doesn’t matter to him.

Once, John Irish was a legend in the porn industry, partying with the likes of John Holmes, Peter North, Nina Hartley, and Seka, but now he's on the far side of 50, and Ron Jeremy won't even return his phone calls. Desperate for any kind of paying work, he's sunk to the level of bit roles in grade-Z porn and is even considering applying to work at Wal-Mart, when hot-blooded starlet Mindy Copperhead comes into his life. He quickly discovers she's far more than a simple blowjob artist, but is in fact an advance scout for a distant alien race, sent to Earth to find...him.

Handle the most difficult girl in the galaxy, or everything blows up. When an alien princess arrives, a jaded celebrity handler has to keep her happy. But will he manage to get through her visit, when catering to her spoiled needs is the only way to prevent her from exploding the Earth, when rebels are trying to assassinate her, and when he starts to seriously fall in love with her?