Poetry Humor

Last week, I saw a mermaid. It's not something I'd pretend! I'd really like to catch her, so she could be my friend. But how to catch a mermaid? You don't learn this in school. We'll need to build a gentle trap and start near the tide pool. Many claim to have caught a mermaid, but can you? The newest title in the New York Times best-selling How to Catch series will have children and parents excited to see if these characters can actually pull off catching a mermaid!

”I’ve never been one to turn down a challenge, but these particular ‘dares’ beat anything I’ve ever seen!” My sorority sisters throw down a triple dare!!! I'm sure it's because they know that no matter what they toss at me, I'm NOT going to knock it back. I'll be up for it. First my sorority sisters challenged me to get the underwear of all the guys in the frat house. I took that dare. And I think I came up with a fair exchange! Next I had to challenge a guy to a wrestling match. Tricky, but at least it didn’t have to be a guy from the wrestling team! The only catch is that ...

OMG! What is my doctor doing to me?! A Hard Exam in So Many Ways! But My Doctor Has a Dirty Little Secret ... that only he and I know about . . . I have a stranger’s hands all over me… and in me... and all the while there’s something I’m sure I should remember... My doctor has been restrained… tied to the exam table… and all the while I keep thinking he seems so familiar! Livvy is reminded of an incident that happened in her late teens when her then boyfriend wanted to do a full physical examination on her… and he played a little TRICK on her that she’s never forgotten Who ...

Get ready to set sail with "Salty Limericks," a hilarious and irreverent collection of poems that will leave you laughing out loud. Whether you're a sailor, a pirate, or simply a lover of the sea, these carefully crafted limericks are sure to entertain and delight. With clever wordplay and a dash of rudeness, each poem delivers a tasty punchline that will have you chortling with glee. Written by a skilled poet, these limericks are a true feast of fun, casting a net to drag a catch of wriggling, rib-tickling words to shore. And the best part? You can share them with your friends and family, ...

This book contains 101 thought-provoking haiku poems, covering broad topics such as life, love, death, and almost everything in between. The poems are filled with insight, passion, and a touch of humor. The author first encountered haiku in high school. He thought they were cool back then, as he does today. The challenge and enjoyment in crafting a haiku is in attempting to portray a meaningful thought or emotion using only three lines and seventeen syllables. That was the challenge the author faced in writing this book. He’s hopeful that you will find these haiku poems both eloquent and ...

A RAINY DAY READER contains 100 poems by Stan Paregien. The poems range from the serious to the hillariously funny, from those with an academic bent to those with little redeeming social value (except for a smile or two). Great for that rainy day read. Poems include "N. Scott Momaday: A Literary Legend," "Had Any Lately?," "My Banker Ain't No Friend of Mine," "Cat Heaven," & "Smart Pills."

Special Price! For a Limited Time: Only .99 cents - Regular Price $2.99 - Save two bucks while offer lasts! Bryce’s girlfriend’s best friend makes him an offer he can’t refuse… Now all he has to do is find a way to accept her offer - and not get caught! What can when the LAST thing he wants to happen HAPPENS? The Offer: excerpt: Bryce gets an offer he can’t refuse - “Ahhh, I must’ve fallen asleep,” she said drowsily, suppressing a little yawn. “Why didn’t you wake me?” “You were sleeping so peacefully, I thought you could use the rest after your hard day,” I lied. ...

OMG! What have I done?! A young conservative wife does something she never dreamed she'd do in a million years: She sleeps with her husband's best friend! A hot soldier teaches her a few new tricks . . . But it goes way beyond that . . . When her husband's best friend stays over while her husband is away ... Kim cannot believe what happens next! Apprx. 12,000 words Previously published in two volumes as Stretched By My Husband's Best Friend. Includes: vaginal / oral / backdoor / fisiting

Meet Chris Harris, the 21st-century Shel Silverstein! Already lauded by critics as a worthy heir to such greats as Silverstein, Seuss, Nash, and Lear, Harris' hilarious debut molds wit and wordplay, nonsense and oxymoron, and visual and verbal sleight of hand in masterful ways that make you look at the world in a whole new wonderfully upside-down way. With enthusiastic endorsements from best-selling luminaries such as Lemony Snicket, Judith Viorst, Andrea Beaty, and many others, this entirely unique collection offers a surprise around every corner.

A laugh-out-loud pirate adventure, perfect for listening to at home, in the car, at bedtime - or any time at all! The Troll longs for a juicy goat to eat - but he's stuck with boring old fish for supper. Bother! Meanwhile, Hank Chief and his pirate crew love fish, but without a decent recipe their slimy, soggy dinner is even worse. If only they could find their buried treasure and pay for a ship's cook, but it seems they've sailed to the wrong island. Again.

Welcome to the Lives of Five Naughty Wives! The long-awaited parody of the TV series is here, naughtier and nastier than the series…Delicious Housewives is the hottest book ever by #1 Best-Selling International Author Tamarias Tyree. Secrets, mystery-suspense and sexual shenanigans! One critic called it a “trashy, fun read!” ~ Names and personalities have been changed/altered in keeping with the parody, but the novel and its characters are still fun and sexy like their TV counterparts. These hot ladies enjoy lots of sexual adventures and an assortment of misadventures including ...

A marvelous collection of Poems and Short Stories from Robert E. Kearns - Award Winning author of Hy Brasil: Island of Eternity, Crabb, Carnivore, Freedom is For the Few, Ossuary, Embers and A Donnybrook Affair. In this work Kearns provides us with thought provoking poems, and an array of incredible stories. . Now with a Five Star editorial review from Readers' Favorite, Poems & Short Stories Vol. 1 is the perfect introduction to the author's work, which can be cherished over and over.

Spunky Grandmas and Other Amusing Characters is a collection of over 100 entertaining, fictional mini stories about comical human behavior. Written in sonnet form, each of 22 chapters starts with a cartoonish illustration by Joella Goyette that introduces the theme of the stories that follow. Humorist, Ken Mogren, features grandmothers who are anything but stereotypical, as well as other folks whose behavior is best described as unconventional.

Virtuoso wordplay, irresistible rhythm, and laugh-out-loud humor abound in the first kids' book by the one and only "Weird Al" Yankovic. This unbridled celebration of creativity and possibility invites listeners of all ages to consider afresh what they want to be when they grow up.

A follow-up to highly acclaimed Spunky Grandmas..and Other Amusing Characters, Super Spunky Grandmas…and Other Amusing Stuff features many of the same type of clever stories about comical human behavior that entertained readers of Mogren’s earlier work. It adds dozens of amusing, tongue-in-cheek observations about human nature and the world we live in, all written in sonnet form. Illustrator, Joella Goyette, is back with cartoonish drawings that introduce the themes of each of the book’s 13 chapters.

Nothing but flowers ******************* Late, late at night, when I just couldn’t sleep I heard a noise outside, it sounded like a beep A flying saucer landed, and no, it was no joke: A little man emerged, who looked at me and spoke

In this third book from Maddox, the reigning king of Internet satire delivers a collection of humorous, unapologetic essays in the same voice that propelled him into comedic stardom. With all-new material, F-ck Whales doesn't fail to deliver on his personal brand of satire, complete with self-promotion, petty rants, and brilliant essays on anything and everything Maddox deems worthy of his ire.

A woman expects her boyfriend to pop the question at dinner, only it’s not the question she expected. A girl finds a game board with frightening results. A young woman must fight off an attacker who has a surprising motive for his crime. The painting of a mother's dead son haunts her. A young wife wants to surprise her husband but it doesn’t turn out as she hoped. Or does it? This book of stories, poems, and other writings by the author of the Twigs series and the Detective Tony Pantera series will delight and frighten as well as make the reader ponder life's way of throwing us a curve ...

Her: Curvy brilliant and pure Him: Older, rough, sexy tough. When I took an internship at my best friend's father's company, I never expected it to change my life. She said his testosterone is low. I want to help out. Late nights at the office became something more when I found Jack, my best friend's incredibly attractive dad, in a compromising situation. Unable to resist, I decided to help him, and our professional boundaries quickly blurred into a world of heated moments and stolen glances. The chemistry between us is undeniable, and every touch, every look, ignites a fire I can't put out...

the varying moods of poetry