Kids Stories Humor

On the first day of school, Artie falls out of his bed and hits his head. Hard. He tells his mom he's dizzy, and she says: "You’re just worried about your first day in a new school." On the second day of school, Artie falls out of bed and hits his head. Hard. He tells his mom he's dizzy, and she says: "You’re just worried about your first day in a new school." Huh?

A town is overrun by road weenies - a.k.a. joggers - who never smile. A girl thinks she's too old for Halloween...until she finds a special pair of gloves. A boy takes a shortcut to an unexpected place. A mummy takes his revenge, one little piece at a time.... These 35 tales ranging from the silly and offbeat to flat-out horrifying are just right for listening alone in the dark.

The last kids may have escaped the forbidden fortress by the skin of their teeth, but there isn't much to celebrate. Thrull has what he needs to complete the Tower, Rezzoch will most certainly come to Earth, and the world as they know it will cease to exist. Except Jack's Cosmic Hand is now even more powerful than he realized, and it might just be able to stop the inevitable from happening. To get the answers he seeks, he'll need to travel farther than he's ever been. He must go...to the monster dimension!

The zombies are disappearing. This might seem like a good thing, since zombies eat your brains, but normal human kid Jack Sullivan is suspicious. He keeps hearing an eerie shrieking noise that seems to be almost summoning the zombies - but to where, and for what (probably) foul purpose? Jack, his three best friends (maybe the only people left on Earth), and their pet monster Rover need to get to the bottom of this. Along the way they encounter a lot more than they bargained for.

Get the Poop: The Diary of a Dung Beetle Dookie is a friendly but hungry young dung beetle whose life revolves around poop. He eats poop, drinks poop, and even bathes in poop. At the end of the day, Dookie loves nothing more than to wash his hair with seagull poo in a nice warm bubble dung bath. Dookie and his best friend Turdy aren't fussy when it comes to eating poop. They'll devour unhealthy fast-poop from McDumps or fresh seapoo from Poopie Joe's Seapoo Shack. These poop-eating beetles will get poop however it's served! Dookie's mom needs an elephant pooball to lay her eggs, so she asks...

Long before saving the earth became a global concern, Dr. Seuss, speaking through his character the Lorax, warned against mindless progress and the danger it posed to the earth's natural beauty.

My biggest worry used to be whether my rogue character would finally loot that stupid dagger after six weeks of grinding. Now? It’s surviving daycare pickup runs, cooking toddler-friendly meals without setting the house on fire, and not getting murdered by magical psychos. It all started when my sister dumped her five-year-old son Adam on me because of some "emergency." I figured I’d Netflix, babysit, and maybe teach the kid how to fake sick days like a pro. What I didn’t plan on? Finding out Adam’s got magic. The dangerous, world-shaking kind. The kind that paints a target on his ...

Does any child like to go shopping? Not Llama Llama! But Mama can't leave Llama at home, so off they go to Shop-O-Rama. Lots of aisles. Long lines. Mama is too busy to notice that Llama Llama is getting m-a-d! And before he knows it, he's having a full-out tantrum! Mama quickly calms him down, but she also realizes that they need to make shopping more fun for both of them. Parents and children are sure to recognize themselves in this fun-to-listen to follow-up to the popular Llama Llama Red Pajama.

El tío Manuel pensaba que los días silenciosos eran los mejores, Se relajaba en casa con un libro y tenía descansos mayores. Las fiestas ruidosas no eran del agrado del tío Manuel, En su cumpleaños su familia lo sorprendía con un pastel.

With his zombie-controlling powers growing stronger, Jack Sullivan and his buddies are road-tripping toward the mysterious Tower, where they must once and for all stop Rezzoch the Ancient, Destructor of Worlds, from descending upon our dimension. But their journey is sidetracked when they are swept up by the Mallusk, an enormous centipede monster carrying the world's largest shopping mall on its back.

It's the first winter after the Monster Apocalypse. For Jack and his buddies, that means sled catapults, epic snowball battles, and one monstrous Christmas celebration. But their winter wonderland turns dark when a villainess begins hunting them. And this villainess is different - she’s a human. When the villainess steals Jack's prized monster-slaying tool, the Louisville Slicer, he vows to get it back. But it won’t be easy. Jack and his friends soon discover that the Louisville Slicer is the key to a dark plan that threatens the entire world - and beyond.

Teach your child patience! * * * * * * * * * "You forgot the mail?" The king yelled at the snail. But the snail stayed as calm as could be. He was not afraid of the king, you see. He knew where the gift was; he knew what to do. The monsters learned that patience pays off too. We are all familiar with the phenomenon of children wanting everything "here and now". This story describes just such a situation. I hope you and your children will enjoy it and learn from it. 子どもたちに辛抱について教えてくれる１冊！ 「郵便を忘れただと？」王様はカタツムリ君に...

In this infectious rhyming book, Baby Llama turns bedtime into an all-out llama drama! Tucked into bed by his mama, Baby Llama immediately starts worrying when she goes downstairs, and his soft whimpers turn to hollers when she doesn't come right back. But just in time, Mama returns to set things right. Children will relate to Baby Llama's need for comfort, as much as parents will appreciate Mama Llama's reassuring message.

The Avery Diary: The Party Invitation! Hilarious Books for Kids 9-12 Middle school was supposed to be simple: survive classes, avoid humiliation, and maybe not trip over your own feet. But for eleven-year-old Avery, it’s more like a reality show called Surviving Middle School: Awkward Edition. With her besties Claire and Ellie dishing out constant warnings about her life choices, Avery is just trying to dodge gym class disasters, keep her locker shut, and avoid the cafeteria pizza (which might be alive). Then, the unthinkable happens—she gets invited to the birthday party. Not just any ...

Poor Dick and Sally. It's cold and wet and they're stuck in the house with nothing to do...until a giant cat in a hat shows up, transforming the dull day into a madcap adventure and almost wrecking the place in the process!

Jack’s friends make a startling discovery: They may not be the last kids on Earth, after all. This is great news for everyone...except Jack. Once they’ve found other humans, his friends won’t stick around for long! Jack’s only hope for keeping things the way they are is to prove that everything here is perfect, life is crazy fun, and nothing else could be any better. After all, they live in a mind-clobberingly cool tree fort, speed through town playing real-life Mario Kart, have a crew of monster buddies, and battle zombies on the regular. That's as good as it gets!

Leer este título de forma gratuita con tu suscripción ilimitado Kindle. * * * * * * * * “Uno” se despertó sintiéndose triste un día, Sabía que no era especial y que nada valía. Sus amigos, los números grandes, tenían trabajo, Menos “Cero” porque él estaba aún más abajo.

Told from June's point of view - and set between the shattering events of The Midnight Blade and The Skeleton Road - June's Wild Flight brings new characters, high-stakes action, and stunning revelations in an adventure that could only be June's. An essential Last Kids story that readers won't want to miss!

"Gassy Ghouls: Zombie Farts and the Smelly Undead (Whiffy Wonders Tootin' Tales Book 2)" 30 Hilarious Zombie Stories That'll Have You Dying of Laughter! Get ready for a spooktacular adventure in the second book of the "Whiffy Wonders Tootin' Tales" series! What's Inside: - 30 side-splitting zombie stories - Full-color illustrations on every page - Silly characters and ridiculous plots - Sneaky reading lessons hidden in the hilarity Meet Zombino the Farty Reading Teacher and a cast of gassy ghouls in stories like: - "The Haunted House of Fearful Farts" - "Zombie Pool Party: The Big Splash ...

Picking up after Quint and Dirk's Hero Quest, the Last Kids are happily reunited—but quickly faced with a monstrous new mission. Inside an other-dimensional fortress, the evil Thrull, alongside a vile new villain, is carrying out a sinister plan. Jack, Quint, June and Dirk must make their own plans to infiltrate the stronghold before Thrull gets any closer to completing the mysterious Tower, a structure that could ultimately spell doom for this dimension.