Kids Humor

Adventure-loving penguin Jackson dreams of being a secret agent like his Uncle Bryn, who works for the Frosty Bureau of Investigation. Jackson and his gadget-inventing best friend, Quigley, might officially be too young to join the FBI, but they aren’t going to let that stop them! They just need to come up with the right plan to prove they are worthy. But when one of Q’s inventions goes dangerously wrong, Jackson suddenly finds himself dropped right in the middle of an FBI stakeout. There’s fishy business afoot at the city’s aquarium....

Stacy Friedman is getting ready for one of the most important events of her young life—her bat mitzvah. All she wants is the perfect dress to wear, her friends by her side, and her biggest crush ever, Andy Goldfarb, to dance with her (and maybe even make out with her on the dance floor). But Stacy's well-laid plans quickly start to fall apart... Her stressed-out mother forces her to buy a hideous sequined dress that makes her look like the bride of Frankenstein. Her mitzvahs are not going well at all. And then the worst thing in the entire world happens.

Penguin presents the audiobook edition of The Ugly Truth by Jeff Kinney, read by Dan Russell. Greg Heffley has always been in a hurry to grow up. But is getting older really all it's cracked up to be? Suddenly Greg is dealing with the pressures of boy-girl parties, increased responsibilities and even the awkward changes that come with getting older. And after a fight with his best friend, Rowley, it looks like Greg is going to have to face the 'ugly truth' all by himself....

In today’s world, it seems like it is becoming ever more important to figure out how to laugh. Society today seems always to be so serious and doesn’t make time for the most important things - like laughing with your friends and family over a few good jokes. So make your life more enjoyable and dive into jokes you haven’t heard of before!

The ever-suspicious students at Bailey School lose control of their imaginations again when they meet new school nurse Mrs. Redding, who they come to believe is a Martian spying on Earth kids.

Amelia Bedelia's friend Rose is having a slumber party. It's Amelia Bedelia's first sleepover, and she's confused. Isn't sleeping boring? Luckily, all the girls in Amelia Bedelia's class are there, and the party is the exact opposite of boring. There are pizzas to eat, games to play, and fingernail polish in all the colors of the rainbow to admire. And when it is time to go to sleep, well, something unexpected happens then, too.

Whatever you do, don't ask Greg about his summer vacation because he definitely doesn't want to talk about it.... It's a brand new year and a brand new journal and Greg is keen to put the humiliating (and secret!) events of last summer firmly behind him. But someone knows everything - someone whose job it is to most definitely not keep anything embarrassing of Greg's private - his big brother, Rodrick. How can Greg make it through this new school year with his not-quite-cool reputation intact?

With over 3,000 jokes, this audiobook is a great addition to any family library and is sure to provide listeners of all ages with limitless pleasure. Explore the world of timeless dad jokes that are so funny they make you grin, sharp one-liners that will surprise you, smart puns that play on words in the funniest ways, and short humorous stories that will make you laugh. There's something in this collection for every age group to appreciate, be they young, old, or somewhere in between.

The kids and their monster buddies are hanging out in the tree house, when Jack launches into an epic, totally-heroic, super-rad story of one of his many post-apocalyptic adventures. Of course, after he's finished, everyone's eager to one-up his tale with a story of their own. Soon, Quint, Dirk, June, and Skaelka, and even Globlet regale the group with sometimes outrageous, often hilarious details of their action-packed escapades during the monster-zombie apocalypse.

What do REAL PIGEONS do? They nest, of course! And when they nest, they nest HARD. Protecting their city from crime is tiring work after all! But the squad can't rest yet, not with a bone-crunching vulture on the loose, a wild child running amok, and a long-lost family to find! Will the REAL PIGEONS ever find the perfect nest to take the perfect nap?

Amelia Bedelia and her friends are studying all about the Middle Ages in school. They’re building catapults, creating illuminated manuscripts, and visiting a medieval fair - in costume! Plus, there’s a class-wide competition to see who can be the most chivalrous student. Amelia Bedelia really wants to win! But when she discovers that one of her friends is the kindest and most helpful of them all, can she somehow help her friend win the competition?

Get ready - book 11 in the phenomenally best-selling Diary of a Wimpy Kid series is coming! The pressure's really piling up on Greg Heffley. His mom thinks video games are turning his brain to mush, so she wants her son to put down the controller and explore his creative side. As if that's not scary enough, Halloween's just around the corner, and the frights are coming at Greg from every angle. When Greg discovers a bag of gummy worms, it sparks an idea.

A brand new collection of gut-busting hilarity from the best-selling author of Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids and Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids.

It's Hallowe'en in Marshland, and Marshland Baptist Church has narrowly dodged the plethora of preachers who forbid this scary holiday. The celebrations will continue! But one young man in the youth group has evil on his mind, while others are envying the wealthy Presbyterians. They are playing paintball all night long for prizes, while the poorer Baptists are toasting marshmallows and taking their little brothers and sisters out trick or treating. Dark plans are brewing out in the windswept marshes, and one young lady is being led astray. Will Jack Daniels realize what is going on and save...

Rafe and Jimmy, two misunderstood "troublemakers", are finally up to something good. They're in charge of a huge celebration of books and reading - but when a small issue snowballs into a big problem that threatens to derail the whole event, they need to work fast to keep things on track! And the best part? Rafe and Jimmy are joined by the funniest storytellers they know, including Jamie Grimm from I Funny, Jacky Ha-Ha, the Kidd family of Treasure Hunters, and super-genius Max Einstein - everyone's favorite characters from James Patterson's best-selling series for kids!

A young girl awakens to find she has memories from two different pasts, fifty years apart, both of which ended tragically when eight years old. She feels different. She is different. She is alive! The Professor has taken charge of a secret government project, which April is the core part of. Li-Ming is assigned to be April’s ‘educator’ and is a a harsh disciplinarian, although as April develops, she softens. However, April is warned by 'Travis', someone who resides inside her head, to trust no-one. When April and Li-Ming begin the drive across America in a specially adapted RV (the ...

Amelia Wishart was the first child ever to receive a Christmas present. It was her Christmas spirit that gave Santa the extra boost of magic he needed to make his first trip around the world. But now Amelia is in trouble. When her mother falls ill, she is sent to the workhouse to toil under cruel Mr. Creeper. For a whole year, Amelia scrubs the floors and eats watery gruel without a whiff of kindness to keep her going. It's not long before her hope begins to drain away.

Which of the following short stories would you read first? A.) A stubborn donkey challenges a Tennessee race horse. B.) A chess match ends in bloodshed. C.) Two sisters beg a funeral director to play their daddy's favorite Johnny Cash song. D.) A shooter takes aim from a church baptistry. E.) Two astronauts survive a horrific spinout only to return to earth and find everybody else walking around in super slow motion. Why not read them all? They're all in this far-flung collection of short stories and more. Scroll up and get them now with just one click.

Rafe isn't exactly considered a winner in Hills Village Middle School, to say the least, but everything's about to change: He's won a school-wide art competition, and the fabulous prize is getting to jet-set off to Australia for a whirlwind adventure! But Rafe soon finds that living in the Land Down Under is harder than he could've ever imagined.

After their adventures in China and Germany, the Kidd family is ready for some rest and relaxation. But when you're an ace treasure hunting team, there's always another adventure waiting around the corner! This time the Kidds head to Russia, where a set of priceless paintings by Leonardo da Vinci and Rembrandt has gone missing. Hot on the trail of the daring thieves, the Kidds race through the sinister streets of St. Petersburg and the wild Arctic tundra to track down the stolen treasure.