Kids Humor

Rafe Khatchadorian has enough problems at home without throwing his first year of middle school into the mix. Luckily, he's got a foolproof plan for the best year ever, if only he can pull it off: With his best friend Leonardo the Silent awarding him points, Rafe will break every rule in his school's oppressive Code of Conduct. Chewing gum in class--5,000 points! Running in the hallway--10,000 points! Pulling the fire alarm--50,000 points! But when Rafe's game starts to catch up with him, he'll have to decide if winning is all that matters.

It's holiday time, and Room One is doing lots of fun things to celebrate. Like making elf costumes! And singing joyful songs! Only, how can Junie B. enjoy the festivities when Tattletale May keeps ruining her holiday glee? And here is the worst part of all! When everyone picks names for Secret Santa, Junie B. gets stuck with Tattletale you-know-who! It's enough to fizzle your holiday spirit!

When Stanley Lambchop awakes one morning, his brother, Arthur, is yelling. A bulletin board has fallen on Stanley during the night, now he is only half an inch thick!

When we last left our hero, Max Crumbly, he had crash-landed on top of a Mighty Meat Monster pizza after taking a late night tumble through the vents at South Ridge Middle School - and he was completely surrounded by three ruthless criminals! Will Max be shredded to bits like mozzarella cheese on the hard and crunchy pizza crust of doom?

Jake McQuade's the smartest kid in the universe—or at least he was. But just as his training with the secret agency known as the Consortium is about to start, Jake's jelly beans go missing! And to make matters worse, they (and Jake's genius!) might be wearing off right when he needs his smarts most! Jake needs to solve this mystery fast. Who stole the jelly beans and why? Can Jake figure out what's going on, recover the missing jelly beans, and stop a high-tech heist before it's too late?!

Jen Dixon is not your typical Kansas City kindergarten class mom - or mom in general. Jen already has two college-age daughters by two different (probably) musicians, and it's her second time around the class mom block with five-year-old Max - this time with a husband and father by her side. Though her best friend and PTA president sees her as the "wisest" candidate for the job (or oldest), not all of the other parents agree.

Jake McQuade is the smartest kid in the universe — and he's back to defend his title! This time, he is heading off to a camp for geniuses sponsored by billionaire tech mogul (and brilliant inventor) Zane Zinkle. But genius camp is not like regular camp. There are limo buses, robot polar bears, and high-tech cabins with high-tech toilets! But it isn’t all fun and brain games at camp, especially when Jake goes up against the artificially intelligent Virtuoso quantum computer — the smartest machine in the universe!

The Queen of England calls on her trusty spy, Mac B., once again. This time, Mac must navigate secret tunnels beneath the Berlin Wall in order to retrieve cheat codes from a Soviet scientist. Floppy disk in hand, our hero finds himself trapped in East Germany, stuck between the wall and the Stasi. How will he escape? Well, it is 1989, and walls do fall down.

After working as a nanny for the power-hungry ShrubBaby (a deceivingly adorable baby shrub), DJ Funkyfoot - a chihuahua who dreams of being a butler - has finally landed his dream job. A real actual butler gig! He's been hired to buttle for President Horse on the day that the president needs to sign a peace treaty with the Queen of Wingland. But the president doesn't feel like it. All he wants to do is kick back, relax, and play some mini-golf.

When the art teacher disappears after a strange display of flashing lights, it looks like Bailey Elementary is in a bind. But out of nowhere a mysterious and pale woman with silver-white hair and an unusual white outfit shows up to take her place. Soon after her arrival the objects of Bailey City start to lose their color, but the new teacher seems to be getting more colorful every day. Can the Bailey School kids stop Bailey City from being washed out before it's too late?

The kids and their monster buddies are hanging out in the tree house, when Jack launches into an epic, totally-heroic, super-rad story of one of his many post-apocalyptic adventures. Of course, after he's finished, everyone's eager to one-up his tale with a story of their own. Soon, Quint, Dirk, June, and Skaelka, and even Globlet regale the group with sometimes outrageous, often hilarious details of their action-packed escapades during the monster-zombie apocalypse.

Children will listen along swimmingly to Dr. Seuss's absurd and endearing fish.

‘Hey, how you doing readers? Adam Buxton here… Let's begin with a recap. No, don't skip it! It's great stuff in the form of a montage of scenes from a film that would certainly revive the flagging fortunes of the cinema were it to be made: The Adam Buxton Story…’ So begins Love You, Bye – Adam Buxton’s wonderful follow up to the bestselling Ramble Book.

Mac must crack a secret code that has been recovered from a double agent. A series of clues leads Mac to France and then to Japan, where he comes face-to-face with his arch-nemesis, the KGB man...and the world headquarters of Nintendo! Is the KGB Man secretly behind all of this? And are Mac's video-game skills good enough to face down his enemy at the Video Game World Championships?

England is in trouble! A priceless violin has been stolen, and there's only one person who can help: Mac B., kid spy. Mac's adventure takes him on a top-secret museum night watch, zip-lining in Italy with his trusty corgi sidekick, and on an undercover mission in the heart of enemy territory. But when he ends up as a captured prisoner, is the mission lost for good?

The problem with books on how to raise kids is that all those other authors have PhDs, MDs, or kids. Luckily this author has none of those limiting factors. Instead, you get hilarious advice based on observations and assumptions with zero evidence. It’s advice that will help you be the best parent you can be whether you have a real job, a fancy job, or a trust fund. Learn the secrets to: Picking a Favorite Winning Kindergarten How to Hide from the Kids Sharing Aggressive Driving for Teens ...and much more terrible advice

Big Nate is going for broke! Mighty Jefferson Middle School always wins. Then Nate decides it's time to go from zeroes to heroes! Will Nate crack under the pressure of the "Ultimate Snowdown"? Or lead P.S. 38 to its biggest victory ever?

A modern fable in humorous verse.

After their masters are vaporized in a goblin battle gone bad, Fart, Pan, and Moxie - three lowly apprentices - decide to impersonate their mentors and pick up the mantle as heroes of the realm. But they need more than a fancy robe, magic staff, and book of magical beasts to be real heroes. They need a quest! So when The Great and Powerful Kevin puts out a call for help, seeking the coveted Golden Llama and its magical golden fart, young Fart and his friends jump at the chance and embark on a journey they were destined for.

"Gassy Ghouls: Zombie Farts and the Smelly Undead (Whiffy Wonders Tootin' Tales Book 2)" 30 Hilarious Zombie Stories That'll Have You Dying of Laughter! Get ready for a spooktacular adventure in the second book of the "Whiffy Wonders Tootin' Tales" series! What's Inside: - 30 side-splitting zombie stories - Full-color illustrations on every page - Silly characters and ridiculous plots - Sneaky reading lessons hidden in the hilarity Meet Zombino the Farty Reading Teacher and a cast of gassy ghouls in stories like: - "The Haunted House of Fearful Farts" - "Zombie Pool Party: The Big Splash ...