Humorous Horror

In this short story from the novel, “SuperHero- Retirement”, recently retired Arch-Villains can’t help themselves. It’s so good to be bad.

After the hurricane, Reggie and Betsy discover a portion of their backyard has begun to sink. Fearing the ground will open up and swallow their house sooner rather than later Reggie calls the city to come fix it, but pushback from the local Sheriff slows the process down by a day. Come nightfall the power goes out, the sinkhole opens, and a busload of ghoulish children crawl to the surface for their first meal in 52 years.

The zombie apocalypse has been good to Sarah and David. Their marriage is better than ever. They communicate well, share responsibilities, and now, they're starting a business. ZombieBusters-for all your zombie extermination needs. There are lots of zombies and that means lots of customers . . . Except one of them doesn't want the zombies dead; he wants them alive and ready for experimentation. Mad scientists make for difficult clients, and this time Sarah and David might have bitten off more than they can chew.

A Collection of Short Tales is an anthology of unique stories that will capture one's imagination. Characters that you might cheer or jeer for are woven into these stories. Maybe... just maybe you will get lost within a tale and emerge a new person. Or maybe... just maybe you will have a good laugh. Either way dive into this compilation of distinctive stories and have fun.

From the madman who brought you Gleefully Macabre Tales, Dead Clown Barbecue, Everything Has Teeth, and Candy Coated Madness comes Jeff Strand’s latest and most twisted collection: Freaky Briefs.

While on her daily walk with her dog in the nearby woods, our protagonist comes across a note, handwritten and carefully pinned to the ground with stones. Her name was Magda. Nobody will ever know who killed her. It wasn't me. Here is her dead body. Shaky even on her best days, she is also alone and new to this area, having moved here from her long-time home after the death of her husband, and now deeply alarmed. Her brooding about the note grows quickly into a full-blown obsession as she explores multiple theories about who Magda was and how she met her fate.

The witch of Tophet County has three primary preoccupations: Kentucky bourbon, Amish romance novels . . . and protecting her true identity from the chthonic monsters who rule humanity with an iron tentacle. Despite her best efforts to get fired, the witch is trapped in a draconian, century-long contract that condemns her to work for the Archons of the Nether Realms in the banal misery of county government. But when she accidentally pleases her many-armed overlords, the Dread Lord of Human Resources curses her with an unwanted promotion. And it involves meetings.

ASBOs may be the pride and joy of New Labour, but they don't cut much ice with Horace Rumpole - he takes the old-fashioned view that if anyone is going to be threatened with a restriction of their liberty then some form of legal proceeding ought to be gone through first. When one of the Timson children is given an ASBO for playing football in the street, Rumpole soon realizes something fishy is going on.

Yes, Andrew Mayhem, hero of Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) is back. Still incredibly brave. Still ridiculously irresponsible. And this time, becoming chainsaw fodder is one of his lesser worries. He’s forced to pose as a serial killer known as The Headhunter in order to infiltrate a group of maniacs who’ve gathered in an isolated Alaskan mansion for a weekend of murderous games. Can he free the potential victims in time...or will he be forced to participate in their demise?

Once a celebrated author of short stories now in his twilight years, Anthony Peardew has spent half his life collecting lost objects, trying to atone for a promise broken many years before. Realising he is running out of time, he leaves his house and all its lost treasures to his assistant Laura, the one person he can trust to fulfil his legacy and reunite the thousands of objects with their rightful owners. But the final wishes of the Keeper of Lost Things have unforeseen repercussions which trigger a most serendipitous series of encounters....

Some say the world will end in fire and ash, others frost and ice, still others dust and dissolution. I say it will end in tentacles. Lots of tentacles.

Life is hard. Change is difficult. But adjusting to being a ghost? Well, that is just darn near impossible. And Bridget Sway is struggling. It's not just the job, the uniform, the housemates, the rules, the community service. It's everything. And now she's facing a week-long group assessment to evaluate her adjustment.As if that isn't bad enough, some inconsiderate soul has shoved another dead ghost in her locker. Things are looking bleak for Bridget. If she fails the assessment, she'll be "re-educated."

In the land of Lapvona, the lord of the land Villiam is cheating the local villagers of their food, their water, their livelihoods. Grotesque and ridiculous, he marries the pregnant and tongueless ex-nun Agata, whom he believes will make him God, and his son will be the second Christ.

A hitman is hired to assassinate the Prince of Darkness himself. A short, whimsical story that takes a serious look at Bible prophecy.

Damian Stockwell was raised from birth to be a force for good. Trained to combat the evils of the world and blessed with the physique of a demigod, he travels the globe on a quest to confront evil and punch it in the face. At his disposal is a vast fortune, an endless array of gadgets, and an army of loyal allies. The year is 1937. A mysterious curse has possessed Stockwell's friend, and nothing will stop him from dishing out justice one fist at a time. From the bowels of the darkest jungle to the armpit of the Statue of Liberty, there is no place that evil can hide from Damian Stockwell.

“Craig’s Chair” introduces you to our slow-witted hero of the Deep South. Craig gets more than he bargains for when he brings home an abandoned leather chair he found on the side of the road. He enjoys its warmth and comfort until he’s pulled into nightmares depicting brutal murders—nightmares in which he becomes the murderer. In “Craig’s Creature,” Craig and his put-upon wife, Lorna, are forced to move in with Craig’s dad, aka Mr. Father.

Samuel thought he had escaped his nightmares, but the horror has only just begun. Trapped in a shifting labyrinth where reality bends and the mind fractures, he must face his own twisted reflection, supernatural entities, and a relentless force lurking in the dark. With every step forward, he questions his own sanity—what is real, and what is a nightmare that refuses to end?

Murders are happening outside Charlotte's hottest nightspots. A new vampire society has set up shop in the sewers. And Jimmy Black's about to run afoul of the Master of the City. If Jimmy weren't already a vampire, the week ahead would be the death of him.

Hammerfall is a quiet town where nothing ever seems to happen, until one day in the late summer of 1999. The adults begin showing signs of a strange infection, turning them into ravenous lunatics that will stop at nothing to infect those around them. A group of teenagers, who had once been friends, find themselves thrust into a new world of carnage. Struggling to put aside their differences, they must learn to rely on one another as the town that they once knew now crumbles around them. Their lives hang in the balance when unlikely allies emerge, but the onslaught of the infected is not the...

What if you had to pretend to be a zombie to survive? Hanson’s been living like a zombie since the apocalypse, until he learns that his zombie crush is, like him, a human pretending to be a zombie.