Humorous Horror

In this story from the novel, “SuperHero – Retirement”, retired SuperHeroes discover a teen with Super abilities, who for secretive family reasons is unable to attend the SuperCharterSchool. So, they decide to train him.

Messina, Noah, and I headed off to Chicago for a little TLC involving "stumping" some vampires. While in the Windy City, the cannibals blew back into our path, and everything started going downhill from there. A rest-stop massacre, Stacks' penchant for getting his ass in a sling, a drunk witch armed with a tube of cookie dough, firebombing explosions, Tom Waits, a hunter dive bar, demonic kid hitchhikers, throwing bodies in dumpsters, and run-ins with two of my exes.

A city where people are turning gleefully insane. Inescapable blood-sucking bugs. A serial killer who may have discovered proof of alien life. A kinky proposal to "even out" an instance of infidelity. A man whose fingernails are growing at an out of control rate. These are only a few of the stories in Jeff Strand's deranged new collection, which includes several macabre tales written just for these bloody audiobook.

The cornerstone of private investigation—insurance fraud. Doing it, obviously. And then there’s the taxi job. Run someone to the airport while being chased by who knows what? Mix that in with drugs, party boats, and the Virgin Mary, and you’ve got a pretty standard day for one Mr. Cole. All for a lousy paycheck. Full of infanticide, evisceration, sadists, and snuff, Alex Cole is part private detective, part mercenary...all sick f--k. Cole Investigations is open—once more—for business.

As a stay-at-home dad taking care of triplets, Andrew Mayhem's days of getting into wild adventures are over. His life is measured in diaper changes. Sleep has become an abstract concept, something oft-discussed with his wife, Helen, but rarely experienced. So, when internet celebrity explorer Percival Longshore asks Andrew and his best friend, Roger, to travel with him on a good old-fashioned treasure hunt, Andrew laughs off the idea.

A Mosca, in un afoso pomeriggio di primavera, due letterati stanno elencando le prove dell'inesistenza di Dio. Lo straniero che si intromette nella discussione è di tutt'altro parere. Non solo, ma è stato presente al processo di Gesù. Si tratta infatti del Diavolo, nei panni del mago Woland, e la sua spettacolare comparsa getterà nel caos il burocratismo sovietico e l'élite letteraria del tempo. Satira devastante e fantastica, il romanzo, in parte ambientato nella capitale sovietica e in parte nell'antica Gerusalemme, è uno dei massimi capolavori della letteratura.

Lex, a teenage Grim Reaper, has the power to damn souls - and it’s getting out of control. Her boyfriend, Driggs, is dead - sort of. She’s a fugitive, on the run from the maniacal new mayor of Croak and the townspeople who want to see her pay the price for her misdeeds. Uncle Mort rounds up the Junior Grims to flee Croak once again, but this time they’re joined by Grotton, the most powerful Grim of all time. Their new mission is clear: Fix his mistakes, or the Afterlife will cease to exist, along with all the souls in it.

Kevin Austin has no plans of staying in the strange mountain town of Eden when he ends up becoming the new librarian after the previous one is murdered. He soon realizes this is no ordinary library. The books actually talk and fly around the rooms, and there's a ghost haunting the premises. Not to mention a collection of dangerous magical artifacts in the basement. In the town of Eden, Kevin encounters witches, zombies, demons, talking crows, angels, even gods and goddesses. Everyone in town seems to have secrets, including the alluring Olive, who Kevin falls for in book 1.

Beak-a-boo, it sees you! Cooper Klavan and his sister Anna are fishing with their parents at a woodland pond when they come across an injured bird. Anna, a huge animal lover, insists on taking it home to rehabilitate. But the bird really does not want to be rescued. It bites Anna, and scares Cooper. Soon, Anna is behaving very strangely. She's perching high up in trees, gathering sticks to hide in her room, and refusing to eat eggs-- once one of her favorite foods. Cooper doesn't want to jump to any conclusions, but his sister seems to be going to the birds.

Why would a mother murder her four children with a smile on her face? What sinister end awaits the regulars of the local watering hole? When Beverly Havermore rubs elbows with other members of high society, what ghosts from her past come to haunt her? Could a curse be behind the mysterious speech problems plaguing an otherwise healthy Benjamin Anatole? The answers to these alarming questions can be found in this collection of seventeen nerve-racking, and at times darkly humorous, short stories that are guaranteed to chill the bones of even the most sensible reader. From a man choosing ...

Sharing a beer with Death - one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse - really put a few things into perspective for this foul-mouthed, billionaire wizard. Like finally getting the stones to propose to his girlfriend. But the Brothers Grimm - legendary supernatural assassins - have escaped their prison, and the number one thing they want after their centuries-long incarceration is Nate Temple’s head. With the entire wedding party also on their hit list and the Temple family fortune in jeopardy, Nate realizes they can’t run and they can’t hide. So, time to do magic and stuff.

After a fire rips through her loft, destroying the seven billboard-size paintings meant for her first major exhibition, a young painter is left with an impossible task: recreate the lost artworks in just three months without getting caught - or ruin her fledgling career. Homeless and desperate, she begs her way into Pine City, an exclusive retreat in upstate New York notorious for three things: outrageous revelries, glamorous artists, and the sparkling black lake where brilliant prodigy Carey Logan drowned herself.

Oliver was always a jerk. Now that he’s dead, he’s downright terrifying. Augie Doyle eats, sleeps, and breathes horror. Vampires? Real. Werewolves? Absolutely. Zombies? Don’t get him started. His best friend, Ethan, thinks it’s all nonsense—until Oliver Hackl shows up to school. Five days ago, Oliver fell off the Old Mill Bridge and broke his neck. The paramedics pronounced him dead. Now he’s back. Pale. Slow. Wrong. Augie’s convinced it’s the zombie apocalypse. Ethan’s sure there’s a logical explanation. Then Oliver’s friends start dropping like flies. One vanishes, ...

Northelm Boarding School on Lake Placid has the worst bully of all - a demon by the name of Hatchet Jack. M.J. Holliday, along with her partners Gilley and the handsome Dr. Steven Sable, are ready to send him back to the portal from whence he came. The school's summer construction, an uncooperative dean, and the very tempting Dr. Delicious are all trying to distract M.J. from her ghost hunting.

In this dark and hilarious new adventure, Andrew has started up a private investigation business with his best friend Roger (slogan: "We Solve Weird Problems"). Since his options in life will become somewhat more limited after his wife Helen gives birth to triplets, it's his last-ditch effort to get out of being stuck with a corporate day job. One of their first clients is an attractive woman named Shirley. Keeping with the kind of luck Andrew has had his entire life, her problem is: "I think I may be a serial killer".

-Extraordinary encounters. Unexpected humor. Endless challenges. Life-threatening diseases. Unthinkable trauma.- Welcome to STAT: Crazy Medical Stories as told by the healthcare professionals themselves. From peculiar conditions and mysterious ailments to remarkable recoveries and perplexing medical mysteries, Stat: Crazy Medical Stories, draws from real-life accounts. Each chapter unveils crazy medical cases as narrated by the healthcare professionals themselves. The stories take you on a captivating journey across various disciplines, including general medicine, surgery, psychiatry, and ...

On the outside, luxury real estate agent Sarah Nelson looks like every other mom in the suburb. But she has an edge that others don’t: She’s a witch. And no one knows . . . except her estranged ex-coven and college friends, Katrina and Alicia. One terrible night during their freshman year, the trio accidentally burned down their dorm, and soon after they scattered. Their secret had been safe, until Sarah learns they’ve been invited back to commemorate the anniversary of the fire.

Nobody likes getting bullied, and Donny has had enough. Deciding to take matters into his own hands, he solicits the help of the old Asian man at the end of his street to teach him Karate. During a grueling two days of training, Donny earns belt after belt, until he finally becomes a Karate Master.

Buffalo is melting. The sidewalks squirm. The cats have formed a militia. Max Noir—sarcastic detective, caffeine addict, and reluctant hero—just wanted his coffee. Instead, he finds himself ankle-deep in sentient goo, guilt-fueled hallucinations, and a grotesque game masterminded by a sourdough-born intelligence. As Buffalo oozes into madness, Max is forced to investigate a mystery that smells like burnt soup, features a psychic yeast tantrum, and may be targeting him personally. From a cheese-curd confession to a feline urine offensive, Max Noir is a genre-bending, noir-splattered ...

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde are about to face off... Mr. Edward Hyde is slowly taking over Dr. Jekyll’s body and committing unspeakable acts while possessing him. Meanwhile, Dr. Frankenstein is working on improving a serum to prevent Hyde from overtaking Jekyll completely and becoming the most notorious serial killer of all time. Have no fear, Abraham Van Helsing is on the case. With help from Mina Harker, Lilith and Adam (Frankenstein) can he save the people of London from the monster that is extinguishing one life after another? Will they stop Hyde before he consumes Dr. Jekyll completely? ...