Humorous Horror

In this story from the novel, “SuperHero – Retirement”, retired SuperHeroes discover a teen with Super abilities, who for secretive family reasons is unable to attend the SuperCharterSchool. So, they decide to train him.

Leigh Somerset wants to spend some quality time with her kids before they grow up, and her husband has always fancied himself sort of a Clark Griswold figure. So the Somersets will be spending their family vacation on the road, driving from suburban Milwaukee to Orlando, Florida. Already off to a rocky start, they stumble upon an abandoned, half-burned down farmhouse in Indiana, and the Somersets inadvertently unleash an eerie history that will follow them the rest of their trip.

The cornerstone of private investigation—insurance fraud. Doing it, obviously. And then there’s the taxi job. Run someone to the airport while being chased by who knows what? Mix that in with drugs, party boats, and the Virgin Mary, and you’ve got a pretty standard day for one Mr. Cole. All for a lousy paycheck. Full of infanticide, evisceration, sadists, and snuff, Alex Cole is part private detective, part mercenary...all sick f--k. Cole Investigations is open—once more—for business.

As a stay-at-home dad taking care of triplets, Andrew Mayhem's days of getting into wild adventures are over. His life is measured in diaper changes. Sleep has become an abstract concept, something oft-discussed with his wife, Helen, but rarely experienced. So, when internet celebrity explorer Percival Longshore asks Andrew and his best friend, Roger, to travel with him on a good old-fashioned treasure hunt, Andrew laughs off the idea.

A Mosca, in un afoso pomeriggio di primavera, due letterati stanno elencando le prove dell'inesistenza di Dio. Lo straniero che si intromette nella discussione è di tutt'altro parere. Non solo, ma è stato presente al processo di Gesù. Si tratta infatti del Diavolo, nei panni del mago Woland, e la sua spettacolare comparsa getterà nel caos il burocratismo sovietico e l'élite letteraria del tempo. Satira devastante e fantastica, il romanzo, in parte ambientato nella capitale sovietica e in parte nell'antica Gerusalemme, è uno dei massimi capolavori della letteratura.

Why would a mother murder her four children with a smile on her face? What sinister end awaits the regulars of the local watering hole? When Beverly Havermore rubs elbows with other members of high society, what ghosts from her past come to haunt her? Could a curse be behind the mysterious speech problems plaguing an otherwise healthy Benjamin Anatole? The answers to these alarming questions can be found in this collection of seventeen nerve-racking, and at times darkly humorous, short stories that are guaranteed to chill the bones of even the most sensible reader. From a man choosing ...

To say I sometimes run hot under the collar is a gross understatement. After what happened in Triton, I was a pissed off 500-pound gorilla with a pink fanny pack, a sawed-off, and a “can do or screw you” attitude. Now, I’m just looking for a visual aide to demonstrate my rage on and the demon that keeps standing me up is my top choice. On my way to get to him, of course, I stumbled over a demon cult that was in the process of signing people up for Hell.

Kevin Austin has no plans of staying in the strange mountain town of Eden when he ends up becoming the new librarian after the previous one is murdered. He soon realizes this is no ordinary library. The books actually talk and fly around the rooms, and there's a ghost haunting the premises. Not to mention a collection of dangerous magical artifacts in the basement. In the town of Eden, Kevin encounters witches, zombies, demons, talking crows, angels, even gods and goddesses. Everyone in town seems to have secrets, including the alluring Olive, who Kevin falls for in book 1.

Sharing a beer with Death - one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse - really put a few things into perspective for this foul-mouthed, billionaire wizard. Like finally getting the stones to propose to his girlfriend. But the Brothers Grimm - legendary supernatural assassins - have escaped their prison, and the number one thing they want after their centuries-long incarceration is Nate Temple’s head. With the entire wedding party also on their hit list and the Temple family fortune in jeopardy, Nate realizes they can’t run and they can’t hide. So, time to do magic and stuff.

From the publisher of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies comes a new tale of romance, heartbreak, and tentacled mayhem. Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters expands the original text of the beloved Jane Austen novel with all-new scenes of giant lobsters, rampaging octopi, two-headed sea serpents, and other biological monstrosities.

OMG! What have I done?! A young conservative wife does something she never dreamed she'd do in a million years: She sleeps with her husband's best friend! A hot soldier teaches her a few new tricks . . . But it goes way beyond that . . . When her husband's best friend stays over while her husband is away ... Kim cannot believe what happens next! Apprx. 12,000 words Previously published in two volumes as Stretched By My Husband's Best Friend. Includes: vaginal / oral / backdoor / fisiting

A city where people are turning gleefully insane. Inescapable blood-sucking bugs. A serial killer who may have discovered proof of alien life. A kinky proposal to "even out" an instance of infidelity. A man whose fingernails are growing at an out of control rate. These are only a few of the stories in Jeff Strand's deranged new collection, which includes several macabre tales written just for these bloody audiobook.

This novel is the tale of Stanley Dabernath, zombie. A regular guy who dies, is brought back to life as a ghastly walking cadaver, and becomes the international sensation hailed by the press as The Amazing Mr. Corpse. Fame! Wealth! Groupies! Despite his ghoulish appearance, Stanley finds himself living the dream. But in many ways, it’s harder to be a celebrity than a zombie. The suits behind Project Second Chance want to tell him how to behave in public. There’s constant pressure coming at him from all sides—not to mention that many people consider him a vile blasphemy.

After a fire rips through her loft, destroying the seven billboard-size paintings meant for her first major exhibition, a young painter is left with an impossible task: recreate the lost artworks in just three months without getting caught - or ruin her fledgling career. Homeless and desperate, she begs her way into Pine City, an exclusive retreat in upstate New York notorious for three things: outrageous revelries, glamorous artists, and the sparkling black lake where brilliant prodigy Carey Logan drowned herself.

Oliver was always a jerk. Now that he’s dead, he’s downright terrifying. Augie Doyle eats, sleeps, and breathes horror. Vampires? Real. Werewolves? Absolutely. Zombies? Don’t get him started. His best friend, Ethan, thinks it’s all nonsense—until Oliver Hackl shows up to school. Five days ago, Oliver fell off the Old Mill Bridge and broke his neck. The paramedics pronounced him dead. Now he’s back. Pale. Slow. Wrong. Augie’s convinced it’s the zombie apocalypse. Ethan’s sure there’s a logical explanation. Then Oliver’s friends start dropping like flies. One vanishes, ...

-Extraordinary encounters. Unexpected humor. Endless challenges. Life-threatening diseases. Unthinkable trauma.- Welcome to STAT: Crazy Medical Stories as told by the healthcare professionals themselves. From peculiar conditions and mysterious ailments to remarkable recoveries and perplexing medical mysteries, Stat: Crazy Medical Stories, draws from real-life accounts. Each chapter unveils crazy medical cases as narrated by the healthcare professionals themselves. The stories take you on a captivating journey across various disciplines, including general medicine, surgery, psychiatry, and ...

On the outside, luxury real estate agent Sarah Nelson looks like every other mom in the suburb. But she has an edge that others don’t: She’s a witch. And no one knows . . . except her estranged ex-coven and college friends, Katrina and Alicia. One terrible night during their freshman year, the trio accidentally burned down their dorm, and soon after they scattered. Their secret had been safe, until Sarah learns they’ve been invited back to commemorate the anniversary of the fire.

The humorous horror trilogy: available here as one box-set (though the titles below are also available individually elsewhere on Amazon). THE WEDDING FEAST Philip awakes, naked and chained to the floor by wrist and ankle, in the ramshackle dwelling of a family of murderous inbreds. His only hope of rescue lies with Matilda, their hideously deformed and needy daughter, who lurks in the shadows in her bloodied wedding dress. But what will she require of him in return? And will it give him carpet burns? Matilda has lived in the darkness all her life. Finally, an Outsider has appeared, a man ...

Nobody likes getting bullied, and Donny has had enough. Deciding to take matters into his own hands, he solicits the help of the old Asian man at the end of his street to teach him Karate. During a grueling two days of training, Donny earns belt after belt, until he finally becomes a Karate Master.

Buffalo is melting. The sidewalks squirm. The cats have formed a militia. Max Noir—sarcastic detective, caffeine addict, and reluctant hero—just wanted his coffee. Instead, he finds himself ankle-deep in sentient goo, guilt-fueled hallucinations, and a grotesque game masterminded by a sourdough-born intelligence. As Buffalo oozes into madness, Max is forced to investigate a mystery that smells like burnt soup, features a psychic yeast tantrum, and may be targeting him personally. From a cheese-curd confession to a feline urine offensive, Max Noir is a genre-bending, noir-splattered ...