Humor Short

I was sent to kill her. I fell in love with her instead. There’s only one rule in my line of work: kill or be killed. I was raised to be the best. A cold-blooded assassin. Until tonight. Until Dahlia. She’s looking for vengeance. I came for blood. One kiss might just kill us both.

Here you have found a book so foul, so repulsive, so horrifying...that you will undoubtedly find yourself running to the nearest bathroom in an effort to both relieve your bowels and scrub your hands clean of its putrid filth. They have finally released this humorous collection of terrifying tales, despite the bitter public outcry which demanded these pages never see the light of day...and perhaps for good reason.

Ever wondered what it's like to be born into a family of assassins? Gin Bombay knows, and now she's sharing her family's deepest, darkest secrets. The Bombay Family Bedtime Stories continue with My Heroes Have Always Been Hitmen! Four more family stories have been released from the vault, including Rio Bombay, wanna-be cowboy and wild west gunslinger; Caspian, the first Bombay to have to take out another Bombay; Aberdeen, the hoop-skirted Antebellum Assassin; and Dublin Bombay, the Scottish Viking Slayer! History is at its most hilarious as this darkly funny family tells all.

Two teens, one cemetery, and an app from hell. Tommy and Billy are just a couple of average high school punks who are about to download a very unaverage app... An app that just might raise the dead. Click BUY NOW or READ FOR FREE!

Christmas in Paris… What could possibly go wrong? Ava Sext, an amateur sleuth and transplanted Londoner who sells books from an outdoor stand that overlooks the Seine, has vowed that this Christmas will be the best Christmas ever. It has to be! It's her first Christmas in Paris as a Parisian. But when someone pushes a book dealer in the Seine at a Christmas Fair leaving him between life and death, Ava, with the help of her fellow bookseller, Henri DeAth, a former notary in a country where notaries are a powerful caste, sets out to solve the crime before someone else dies. A little Paris ...

Mark Twain's "Extracts from Adam's Diary" first appeared in 1893. He based Adam and Eve on himself and his beloved wife Olivia ("Livy") to create a humorous counterpoint the traditional Garden of Eden story, this time centered on what life may have been like for the first man. In this story, we hear Adam trying to work out what the "new creature with long hair" is all about. She names things, much to Adam's annoyance. She follows him around. Then suddenly, there's another creature, which eventually Adam decides is his son Cain. It's all about confusion and curiosity, and finally, love for Eve.

Andy and Danny boldly go where sensible people fear to tread. Just how stupid can two human beings be? Just Stupid! provides the answer to this vexing and important question. Winner of AudioFile's Earphones Award - 2005.

This collection of sharply observed animal-themed tales is a delight, told with David Sedaris's trademark blend of hilarity and goodnaturedness. Though the characters may not be human, the situations in these stories bear an uncanny resemblance to the insanity of our own everyday interactions.

This is a collection of the second six short stories in the Caverns and Creatures series.

David and Ellie didn’t realize how much they have missed their friends, two other couples who had moved out of their modest neighborhood in a desert city for the comforts of the suburbs, until the day of Donald Trump’s election. Separated also from their daughter who lived hours away in California, they were in a funk. But, when Ellie discovers a repellent offering floating in the small Jacuzzi in their backyard, David is blindsided. Little does he know this is but the first in a chain of grisly events that would play out in their lives with devastating consequences.

Award-winning comedian Andrew Heaton brings wit and warmth to his vision of humanity, the supernatural, and bureaucrats in his debut short story collection. Learn the pitfalls of settling resurrected Neanderthals in Detroit. Explore the work-life balance of a professional who assumes other people’s hangovers. Or the travails of a State Department diplomat posted to a planet with relentless boredom and allergies. Discover the challenges time-travel regulators face when everyone tries to kill Hitler.

Featuring Margaret MacDonald's storytelling accompanied by Richard Scholtz's autoharp and dulcimer, this recording is full of lively, playful fare. These selections are ideal for expanding into song, dance, and creative drama. Includes stories adapted from MacDonald's picture books, Fat Cat (Denmark) and Mabela the Clever (Limba, Sierra Leone), as well as several from her resource collection Shake-it-up Tales.

Six couples. Six steamy nights. Six unexpected encounters that lead to love. Sometimes love at first sight can happen in the most unexpected places… Welcome to Club Surrender, a women only club where you can give into your secret fantasies, blow off some steam, and maybe find the woman of your dreams. This book includes the complete “Club Surrender” series including: Jaded Hated Fated Saved Caged DaredClub Surrender is a fun and steamy lesbian instalove romance collection featuring matchmaking dommes, loving sapphic relationships, and sweet happily ever afters.

This is a collection of six short stories from the Caverns and Creatures series. It includes the following stories: "Slimes and Misty Wieners", "Great Balls on Fire", "Your Anus Is a Gas Giant", "Clear and Present Ranger", "The Mimic's Chest", and "Styxian Stoners May Break My Boners".

Living is hard. Living is complicated. But, this book can help you make sense of everything important in the life of (almost any) individual, along with a pinch of humor and a lot of pop-culture references. Written by a practicing counseling psychologist with over 10 years of therapeutic experience - who’s also a game design teacher - this book aims to cover it all. It does the same through simple and clear language, steering clear of complex psychological notions and statistics of any kind. There’s no hard data in this book and the author takes pride in that fact. But, it’s full of ...

Ravaged At the Party! Be the first to read Lakelyn's Forced By Strangers ~ Book 4 Excerpt: How did I get here… alone in the dark basement with three hot strangers and no clothes… not even a bra… or panties? Well, I could say it all started with a party invitation, but I have a feeling it started before then. It didn’t get underway, though, until I arrived at my best friend’s house that evening. The night promised to be unforgettable... The party was going full blast. People laughing and talking – and drinking. Some of them mingling. Lots of flirting. Music pulsating, beat ...

Strong men need an even stronger woman to take them in hand and give them the punishment they crave… To the outside world these men are confident and in charge, but behind closed doors the dynamic changes. They willingly turn over their control to a dominatrix who will tease them, spank them, humiliate them, and then make them beg for more. “Under Her Control” is a collection of three short and steamy female domination stories that combine pain and pleasure for a very happy ending. About the Submitting to Her series: Who says all the dominants have to be men? Sometimes the women want ...

After two years of searching, Marvin has one last night to find proof of alien life. Instead he gets drunk with his clone Reggie. Marvin is such a failure as an archaeologist and has such a hangover that he can’t even see straight let alone crawl home. Will his parents fire up the spaceship and take off without him? And if they do wait for Marvin, does he have to take his clone back to earth? What are people going to think of Marvin when they find out Reggie is one atmosphere short of an ‘M’ class planet? Suddenly a little green man is pointing a ray gun at him. Marvin no longer gives...

Can old friends reuniting be the start of something new? Lily and Jasmine decide that it's time to get together with Anna Halwell, the attorney handling the vestiges of Sam's divorce paperwork. They were good friends in college but have lost touch since then. A night out reminds the three of them how much fun they used to have, and gets Anna thinking about how much more fun could be waiting. But she's a lawyer, and Sam's her client, and she can't do anything...unethical. Lily and Jasmine want Anna to be part of their relationship, but it's not going to be easy to pull off. The only way to ...

Protecting Her Heart Bundle Blurb: From Amazon #1 Best-Selling Author Regina Wade comes this long awaited bundle The first nine installments of the Protecting Her Heart series features smokin’ hot alpha males and the innocent, curvy heroines that tame their hearts. And every other part of them, too. A steamy collection that Includes all epilogues and extended epilogues from the #1 New Releases Her Billionaire Boss and Her Billionaire Landlord Along with: Her Brother’s Best Friend July Fourth with His Best Friend’s Daughter Dad’s Private Investigator Best Friend Her BFF’s Brother ...